THANKSGIVING, 2007--EARTHSIDE
As compromises go, it wasn't
half bad.
Three tables. Three webcams. Turkey
on the table at 6pm in San Francisco while the Tokyo Elrics
celebrated with a festive brunch of omelets, steak, pain perdu buried
under wild strawberries, fresh fruit salad, and enough coffee to
float a Behemoth RV.
Hughes
and Gracia, four days home from the hospital, were logging in from
Los Angeles. They had set up in the living room so that Gracia could
rest on the couch. "We already had our turkey," Elysia
confided, "so we're having our dessert. 'Cept for my
sister—my mommy is bestfeeding!"
"Whoa! Whoops!
Sorry about that, folks!" Mayland Hughes distracted his
firstborn by spritzing a mountain of cream in ornate curlicues over
her slice of pumpkin pie. "
"We
didn't hear a thing, did we?" Alfons winked at his sister in
'Frisco. Alphonse's older children were hosting the Elric clan's
festivities from Risembool West, currently the home of Fritz, his
wife Christine and their son Edwin. Alfons named his son after his
own beloved godfather, famed German ex-patriot film genius Fritz
Lang. Lang had befriended Edward in Germany just before the war and
had encouraged Ed and Al to emigrate to the U.S. along with the other
German scientists who wished to play no part in the war machine of
the Third Reich. "Uncle Fritz" had been a fixture at Elric
Thanksgiving dinners right up until his death in the 70's.
Even with the 'Tokyo Contingent' absent from the feast the room
was still crammed to the rafters with Elrics and Rockbells, plus the
'Shanghaied Elrics'—people like Denny Brosh, Maria Ross,
Sheska, the Hughes family and a handful of others who found
themselves embraced by Alphonse, Ed or the Earth-born decedents of
Hohenheim.
"Hey! Aunt Tee! When are
you and Uncle Remy coming back?" Edwin waved at the camera.
"Will you be here for Christmas? Dad says I can go bike riding
with you as long as I wear a helmet." Like his great grandmother
Winry, Edwin had a passion for motorcycles, even though he was too
young to ride solo. He greatly approved his aunt's choice of Havoc
as her life partner. Uncle Jean-Remy was beyond cool with his big-ass
Harley Electra-Glide, leather jackets and his unflappable Cajun joie
de vie.
Teddy shook her head. "We'll be back before
Mardi Gras. We'll see you then—oh, and I'm bringing a big
surprise back to the States."
At
the words big surprise, Win-Sara dropped her napkin, bending down to
mask the uneasy expression on her face. Aware of the questions that
might come of a close perusal of her medical records, Teddy and Remy
had settled in Japan with Ed and Alphonse and Mustang to wait out the
birth, planning to introduce little Izumi Jean as an adopted newborn.
And happy as they tried to be for their little sister, the whole deal
unnerved the hell out of Alfons and Win-Sara.
Alphonse had always battled against the natural skepticism of his
older children. The recent adventures in Amestris—and the
ultrasounds of Teddy's unborn child--had flung irrefutable
evidence, once and for all, that their old man and quarrelsome uncle
were not simply spinning imaginative yarns to comfort themselves
since their exile from their motherland. Amestris was real. Alchemy,
damn it, was real. Two—no, three—members of the family were full
fledged alchemists. Hell's bells—there were even pictures!
Alphonse and Teddy posing with a tall, wasted figure with an eye
patch who appeared to be conjuring a small flame with the snap of his
fingers. Teddy standing in a glowing array, this one eye'd Colonel
supervising her from one side. A cluster of older men and a graceful
silver haired woman surrounding their father—and one of them was a
dead ringer for Teddy's lover, Havoc!
Edo had finally laid down the law. "Our father fucked up, got
it?" he growled at them when balked at the evidence. "For
the rest of our lives—as long as there are those goddamned Gateway
Stones and we can't figure out how the hell to destroy them, our
family has got to have trained alchemists who know how to deal with
anybody and anything that tries to cross over. A lot of innocent
people died back before the war when those jerks from the Thule
Society opened the Gate on this side. And you do not want to know
what it did to our home world. This shit is not going to happen
again. Do you understand me? This is what your father and I and your
kid sister do—we are the watchdogs who keep Earth safe from
Amestris—and Amestris safe from Earth. You'd better deal with
this, or you'll tear this family apart."
Alfons quickly caught his sister's eye. It's okay, Win. Let it go. It's a holiday, after all.
So they ate their pie in L.A., carved the turkey in San Francisco and toasted one another with champagne and orange juice in Japan—the Elrics, Rockbells, Hugheses and Havocs and their adopted kinfolk. "Sucks not to be there with you," Ed admitted, tearing into his second mushroom omelet as if he hadn't already demolished the first one as well as a half dozen sausages. "Still, it's great that we can talk like this together. And soon as most of us are done we can get down to business."
A third omelet and three cups of coffee later, Edward rapped on the table for order. "Right! First things first—it's good to see you all. We're here, intact, nobody's dead or run off or whatever. Next year we'll be back on the west coast for Thanksgiving…although we are planning a special family reunion trip this spring—I'll get to that later, okay?" All three tables had exploded into eager—and anxious—talk at the mention of family reunion. Every time the Elrics had invaded a resort area en masse there was bound to be mayhem, and Uncle Edo was invariably at the heart of the trouble. It could be great fun…provided you weren't one of the ones caught up in the chaos. Fritz would never forget the famous trip to Disneyland when Edo offered to ride Space Mountain with him—and got booted off for being too short. When the cast member suggested that It's A Small World didn't have any such height requirements Ed had to be physically dragged out of the line before any punches were thrown.
"Anyway," he continued, "let me be the first to welcome Teddi-Grace Hughes to our family!" He lifted his glass and the family toasted with him as Gracia glowed with pride. "Long life to you, and to Miss Elysia, who is now officially a big sister!" He glanced across the table where the Havocs were seated on either side of Teddy. "And for anyone who hasn't met them yet, Jean-Remy and his mother Jeanne-Marie have joined us from Louisiana. Teddy and Remy are going to be handfasted at Mardi Gras this spring, so all of you who aren't adverse to Pagan rituals that involve large quantities of food and alcohol and jazz are invited to throw beads and doubloons at the happy couple if you happen to be in New Orleans. As for Teddy's surprise—Mays and Gracia aren't the only ones celebrating a new arrival. Teddy and Remy will be welcoming a very special little girl into their lives. They're going to name her Izumi Jean Elric—hold on! Everybody shut up!" he yelled as pandemonium broke out. "The baby is expected to be born sometime around the first week of December, and they have to wait for her to be old enough to travel and to get all her papers in a row. Soon as we bring her home, we'll upload some pictures to the website."
Teddy, disguising her heavy belly
by slouching at the table, heaved a sigh of relief. "Told you
he'd handle it for you," Taisa whispered with a grin. "He
can be tactful."
"Usually Edo
is about as subtle as flying mallet," she shrugged. "Hope
it doesn't cause internal bleeding or anything."
"Roy." Edward nodded to his lover, who rose and joined him at the head of the Tokyo table. Turning to the camera, Edward became very serious. "EVERYBODY Shut the hell up! This is the big news, and we have wanted to share this with our loved ones for some time now. Taisa Roy Mustang and I have been together for longer than a lot of you have been alive. Thirty years, and we haven't killed one another yet.
"When
Mustang and I met back in 1976, it was dangerous for two men to walk
down the street holding hands. Damn it, it's still dangerous. There
are a lot of evil minded people out there who wouldn't mind pumping
a few rounds of bullets in either of us, just because the person we
share our life with happens to be another guy. I knew the day I met
this man that I was never going to let him go. Now, I know not
everybody here is comfortable with that. Three words, people: get
over it. Do it now, because—hell!" To everyone's
astonishment, Edward rubbed at his eyes for a moment before reaching
up to grab at Mustang's shoulders. "I asked you this in front
of a bunch of repressed closet cases in the jungles of the
Caribbean—and you said yes. I asked you again in Paris—and nearly
got the shit beaten out of both of us for kissing you on the Eiffel
Tower You said yes."
"Right
after I paid off the sommelier at Le Jules Verne, that restaurant on
the second level, so we could crawl down the service hatch and get
away from the gendarmes."
Edward shook his head dismissively. "Only one star from Guide
Michelin, even with Alain Ducasse at the helm. The food wasn't
brilliant but you looked great in white tie and tails."
"—which were ripped to shreds when we were
halfway down to the first level—"
"Look—it was better than ending up in some pissant Parisian
police lockup waiting for Hughes to bail us out before some branleur
tried to make you his tassepé—"
"Oh really? Well, as the French would say,
Edowado, 'C'est
vraiment de ta faute!'
Remy, would you mind translating that for this trou
de cul?"
"French?"
Havoc looked innocent. "Me? I'm Swiss.
Swiss and neutral."
"And if you were my boy, Edouard, I'd wash your mouth out with
soap!" Jeanne-Marie cut in crossly. "Regardez les
enfants!"
She was right. Not
everybody at the table was accustomed to the foul mouthed squabbling
of the lovers and some looked rather uncomfortable. Ed shrugged,
mumbled something that might have been an apology, and returned to
the subject at hand. "Anyway, I wanna do this one more time, in
front of my whole family and the people I love best. So…Taisa Roy
Mustang, will you marry me?"
"Why
the hell not?" Mustang smirked wickedly. "Gracia? We'll
need your help getting Ed's gown altered so he won't trip over
the train—"
"Why you low-life,
backstabbing, smirking evil bast—"
Teddy
and Remy, as if on cue, began waving their napkins like white flags.
"PEACE! Pax! Pacce! Shanti!" Teddy shouted.
"Don't make us start singing 'Kumbaya',"
her lover added.
Edward lifted his hands
in mock surrender and returned to his audience. "Right! Soon as
we can find a place for a legal wedding, we'll make the
announcement so we can make travel plans, since we want Teddy and
Gracia there and we have to make sure the babies can come with us, or
arrange child care while we are gone." Edward folded his arms
and stared right into the camera. "All right—this is the point
when you should be saying 'congratulations'."
The response was almost completely positive.
The lone naysayer, however, cut Edward to the heart.
"That's….god…that's
just sick,
dude!" Young Edwin shoved his chair back, looking flushed and
furious. " I mean--you're acting like a bunch
of faggots!"
"We are,"
said Roy calmly.
"And
we're family," Edward added sternly. "Watch your
goddamned mouth, kid."
"You're
not my family, you fuckin' perverts," the boy shouted,
flipping a rude gesture at the head of his family before stomping out
the front door.
"Hey."
Mustang glanced wearily up from the same paragraph he'd been
reading for over an hour. He smiled faintly, lifting his hand in
welcome. "Edo back yet?"
Havoc
shook his head. "Alphonse says he left on foot, so you shouldn't
worry about him smashing up the car again." He shrugged. "He's
hurt. Has every right to be. The kid was way out of line. And I think
that we might give everybody a few days to calm down before we get it
sorted out. Kids his age…maybe I can talk to him, get him to see
this objectively. Maybe he'll take it back."
"I'm not holding my breath." Roy didn't look hopeful.
"Well, he damn well won't listen to me, if that's the way he
feels. And I'm guessing Teddy's pretty upset, right? Edwin is
technically her alchemic disciple."
Havoc sighed a little. "Furious. Maman's letting her vent a
little before getting her to settle down. Says she's going to jerk
a knot in Edwin's tail for being a 'snotty little bastard'.
She's very protective of you., my friend. She figures Edouard can
take care of himself—most of the trouble that comes after him is
invited in, it seems. But if anyone hurts her Taisa, she's ready to
load up both barrels and start blowing people's heads off.
Figuratively,
of course."
Mustang chuckled
slightly. "Don't be too sure. You know the old saying,
'friends will give you a place to hide, and real friends will give
you a place to hide bodies.' When I told you an Elric will lay down
his or her life for a loved one, I wasn't joking. They will…and
they have, on occasion. The night we met Teddy and Hughes saved
neck—possibly even my life. Didn't know me. Didn't ask. They
just saw I was being beaten and about to be assaulted—"
"Mon Dieu!
Was this at Berkeley?"
"Yeah.
Funny. I don't remember seeing Queer Bashing listed as a team sport
when I accepted the scholarship. But there I was, and those two
swooped down out of nowhere and ran straight into that gang like a
pair of hippy avengers. Hughes got a microphone out of Teddy's gear
bag and was whipping that damn thing in arcs like Roger Daltrey,
screaming like mad. And Teddy grabbed her Nikon and shot enough
incriminating pictures to get the whole damn lacrosse team expelled."
He sipped his coffee, quietly for a moment. "Twenty four hours
later I had a new home. Two months later—in fact it was on
Thanksgiving night of 1976—the three of us became lovers. And five
months later Teddy introduced me to Edward."
Remy nodded. "Hughes runs over me with an RV, and before I know
it I've settled down with an alchemist—took less than a
week."
"And expecting your
first child," Roy lifted his cup in salute.
"Indeed, for which we both know I have you to thank."
"Hmmm. Indirectly, I suppose. I don't remember much of
Amestris. Bits and flashes now and then. That's better than being
haunted by the past the way the Colonel was. Maybe…I don't
know…"
"Roy," Remy sat
down on the edge of the bed. "You should know that Teddy and
Alphonse are both noticing little…inconsistencies. Finding that
events of the past that they remember don't jive with what everyone
else remembers."
"Like not
remembering that she and I have an intimate history?"
"Which she believes was never consummated. Oh, not that it
worries me, my friend," Havoc assured him with a grin. "I
know that you would have been very good to her—"
"—was good to her, and it's a tiny blow to the ego to know
the one woman I made love to has no recollection of it at all--
"—and if she does remember, hopefully she'll realize it is
nothing she needs to be anxious about. But—well, I remember before
those two went through the Orlando 5 Gateway and they were cramming
everything in sight in your pockets? Everything from water
purification tablets to disposable cameras and Sharpies. They had a
pair of letters from Ed, the ones that came out of the vault in Los
Angeles."
Roy sat up straight. "What
about them?"
"I caught hold of
Teddy right as she and her father were pulled though. I didn't let
go of her. And when we got back to the hotel, we undressed her and
got her into a bath, to warm her up. Gracia and I went through her
stuff—that's how we found the flute she transmuted and the
crystal she shaped from the cave rock. I also found a baggie full of
dirt and another full of pebbles and rock fragments."
"A piece of home, Alphonse called it."
"Right. Ed asked me if we had the letter. Said it was very
personal and was only to be read if he died or they couldn't get
back. Ed wanted it back in his vault. Roy—she didn't have it.
Neither did Alphonse, and he didn't have his own, either.
Roy looked suddenly sober. "Either they were consumed in the
Gateway—""Or, for some reason, both letters were left in
Amestris, 1951. Mon frere, was there anything in those letters we
should be worried about?"
AMESTRIS, 2001
"A project for school, you say?"
"Yeah, Dad. I mean, isn't there this thing called the Legacy Law, allowing families and identified disciples of alchemists to gain access to some of the personal papers in their archives?"
His father looked up from his microscope. "Not the research diaries. Mostly the published works, letters. Articles written about them. It's good to see you're taking an interest in Russell and Fletcher, Josh. I can email the admin for an access pass. Probably get it for you in a day or two. Hey, we could go together—" "No, that's okay!" Josh. "I—I mean, that's good, Dad, but I'll want to go after school. Got stuff to do on the weekend."
Whew, that was too close, Josh Tringham told himself as he headed back for his room. Once I get that damned pass I can poke around and see what kind of dirt I can dig up on the Fullmetal Faggot and the Flamer. "Hope I hit pay dirt, or they're gonna take the price of that pizza right out of my ass…"
Risembool East, Tokyo— November 22--Thanksgiving 2007
It started with a puff of smoke, really…
Remy wanted his mother to give up cigarettes. Jeanne-Marie wanted Teddy to stop drinking Coca Cola, which Teddy has been addicted to since childhood. Teddy wanted Alphonse to quit fretting and worrying obsessively about Everything That Might Go Wrong when the time came for Teddy to give birth. Alphonse wanted Edward to stop peppering the air with foul language every time he opened his mouth, arguing that he didn't want his granddaughter to be exposed to such vile profanity—which Edward seems to regard as a high art. Ed wanted me to stop making remarks about his age and height. Now, really--is it my fault that he takes offense when I remind him that he's too short to ride Space Mountain and old enough to have given Hitler the finger?
Havoc and I? Shit. We just wanted everybody to shut the fuck up, calm the hell down and get off each other's backs.
Everybody was on edge, thanks to the ugly blowup on Thanksgiving Day, when our nephew Edwin essentially told Edward and I we were a pair of faggots and no kin to him. Now you know Edward. You know he shrugged, got up from the table, grabbed his coat and stomped out alone into the snow, fists jammed in his pocket, head down and his face carefully arranged in one of those Elrician scowls that wards off all but the very young and the very brave. Alphonse shut himself up in the library with a half-dozen cats to comfort him. Teddy stomped around the penthouse, singeing the air with profanity in several languages, including what sounded like Mandarin Chinese, which she probably picked up from watching Firefly with her dad. Remy cleaned up the remains of our brunch, washed the dishes, and was wise enough to let Teddy wind down before gently reminding her that this was a thirteen year old kid she was damning to the seventh inner circle of hell, not to mention he was soon to be groomed to begin his studies in alchemy under her guidance.
It was early, but I decided to hell with everybody, grabbed a book, my iPod and my pet rat and curled up in bed like a lazy bastard, listening to jazz and letting Einstein forage in my pocket for concealed yogurt drops. At one point he crawled down my shoulder, struggled up the summit of Ed's pillow and peed all over it. I was in such a foul mood that I simply flipped the damn pillow over. Thwarted, Einstein promptly decorated the pillowcase with a half dozen or so 'rat raisins' and foofled triumphantly.
Before I could flick the offensive pellets into the trash, Remy let himself in, worried about Edo and surprisingly, worried about me. He's a deep one, that Cajun. Intuitive to the point that he's almost a little scary sometimes. We talked at length and eventually I crawled out of bed and made some fresh coffee. I could hear Alphonse snoring gently—probably stretched out on the library couch with old Pinako draped over his chest, purring loudly in his ear. Teddy was in the computer room, watching an illegally downloaded episode of Doctor Who and IM'ing Gracia. She apologized for losing her temper and said she'd try and talk things out with Edwin once she'd had some time to cool off. "You guys seen Edo since brunch?" she asked.
"Maybe we'd better go look for him," Remy suggested. "What about Maman?"
"No idea, although I think she was going out for some fresh air, she said."
Havoc's eyes began to flash cold blue fire. "Breath of smoke, more likely. Je n'y crois pas à ces conneries!"
I glanced at Teddy. "Translation?"
She grinned at her lover. "He says he can't believe her bullshit. "Darlin', when we first met you were still trying to kick your own nicotine habit. I'll never forget the way you used to shove those damned carrots in your mouth so you had something to keep you occupied. Hughes used to email me and say, 'so—how's Carrot Boy doing?'"
"Remind me to kick his ass next time I see him," Havoc answered curtly. "Note that I've never made cracks about his habit of shoving those damned pictures in our faces every time we turn around. And you'll note that I've never flashed your ultrasounds around, either."
"For which our daughter will undoubtedly be grateful. Personally, I think they look a little creepy. Poor Gracia, " she sighed. "He went completely crackers when Elysia was born. Shoved a thousand dollar camcorder right between Gracia's legs and she got so mad she kicked it right across the delivery room and into the hazardous waste bin. Perfect shot. Lady should have been scouted by the NFL."
"Speaking of annoying people," I cut in, "let's go find Edo. Need anything while we're out?"
"Yeah." Her grin was brimming with malice. "An ice cold bottle of the bubbly brown Elixir of Life that Maman says is going to rot Izumi's teeth—even before she has any!" She paused for a moment. "And some Pocky. That's the crack of snacks—and Taisa, you got me hooked, damn you!"
Well…didn't I say everybody was ragging each other's ass about something?
Ed had run into Ai-san in the teashop down the road and had joined her for sweet bean cakes and green tea. Our housekeeper has a remarkably soothing effect on my combustible lover and he had actually been good mannered enough to escort her home, carrying her shopping for her—which actually annoys the hell out of Ai-san, making her feel like she's a fragile old lady, which she emphatically is not, believe me. We took the short cut home through the park, stopping at the drink kiosk to get a bottle of the contraband soda Teddy craved more than ever and a enough packets of Pocky to share around.
About a block from the house we found her, half-concealed in some shrubbery, puffing away like a fiend. Havoc snuck up behind her and whacked his sainted mother right between the shoulders.
She whirled around, belching smoke and patois obscenities, and planted one of her size nine Tony Lama cowboy boots right into her son's crotch. "Nom de dieu de bordel de merde—REMY! Mon Dieu, what have I done?"
"You fucking maniac!" Ed shouted.
"Don't call my mother a fucking maniac!" Remy was gagging and turning crimson but that didn't prevent him from looking exceptionally tall, muscular and threatening.
"Knock it off, Ed!" I told him firmly. "Pick on somebody your own size—if you can find one!"
"Goddamn you, Mustang! I hate your fucking guts!" He grabbed at my sleeve and the bottle of contraband soda hit the ground at our feet, bursting like a bomb and dousing us all.
"Coca-Cola!" Jeanne-Marie rounded on me now, eyes blazing. "You—you'd poison your own unborn child? What kind of a monster are you?"
All this shouting and swearing had summoned Alphonse, heading to the corner market for some cat food. I tend to forget at times just how imposing my 'brother-in-law' really is. Broad-shouldered like Havoc, but of a heavier build—and very little of it is pudge. This is a man who can pick up his older brother with little effort and hurl him across a dojo as easily as Elysia could fling a stuffed bunny.
"I…HAVE…HAD…ENOUGH!!"
If I had had any urine in my bladder I'd have disgraced myself on the spot. Those hazel-bronze eyes burned holes into our foreheads, and, quite suddenly, all of us had shrunk down to Edward's size—from sheer terror.
Alphonse looked mad enough to bite our heads off, chew them to ribbons and spit the leftovers down our necks.
"You!" he jabbed a finger sharply into his brother's chest, "are going to shut your mouth, and if you say one more swear word, so help me Edward, I'm going to turn you over my knee and spank you like a child!" He shot me an equally angry glare. "You just love to egg him on, Taisa! You're every bit as bad, and I want you to stop it, right now!"
He regarded Jeanne-Marie sternly. "You complain about Teddy drinking soda and eating the wrong foods--and you're sneaking cigarettes, knowing bloody well that you could die of lung cancer—and Izumi would lose her only grandmother! It's hypocritical, and it's wrong."
Havoc didn't budge. "What about me, sir?"
Alphonse looked suddenly weary. "You shouldn't let S me get so riled up over things like this. I'm…well…I'm not helping matters either, am I?"
We stood in silence, avoiding one another's eyes. "Let's go home then," said Havoc softly…
26 November, 2007
…and of course, we were painfully polite to one another all weekend long…
"Taisa? What the fuck is going on around here? Is it that business with Edwin?"
We were sitting in the nursery, where Teddy was putting the final touches on the small shrine she had started a week ago. Just a shelf, really, but it was over the head of Izumi's crib and contained a few personal totems that Teddy imagined would bring positive chi to her daughter's room. A pebble from Strawberry Fields, where she always prayed to one of her most personal of household saints, John Lennon. A twig from Glastonbury Tor. A tiny clay statue of Isis she'd bought in a Cairo bazaar, joined by an image of Kwan Yin my mother had placed above my own crib when I was a baby. A framed portrait of Winry. A vase of fresh flowers and a candleholder made from a single chunk of raw rose quartz. Strangest of all was carving of a snake, adorned with rainbow dots and stripes. "That was a gift from a Pitanjara woman Daddy and I met in Australia. She said that it was the Rainbow Serpent—she said that our clan was haunted by Green Lizard man, a trickster that means us harm. She said that the Rainbow Serpent will protect us. Sounds a lot like Dambala, who is sacred to the swamp magics of Remy's people. And there's the serpent on our crest as well…just…I don't know…"
"…seemed like a good idea?" I teased her gently. "Makes about as much sense as some people hanging crosses or pictures of Krishna or other saints in a nursery. If it works for you, hey…." I examined the pebble from Strawberry Fields—I had brought it back to her after a New York trip twenty years ago, amazed that she'd kept it all these years. "And no, it's not all about Edwin. I think everybody's just, I don't know…tense. Waiting. And it's hardest on you, I know."
"I'm so damn tired." She leaned against the side of the crib and shook her head. "And I'm so damn scared."
I slid my arms around her shoulders, letting her lean on me. "Are you sorry you didn't—"
"No. As if I would undo your child…even if you don't remember making her in Amestris….fifty goddamned years ago."
"If you and Alphonse hadn't gone through the Gate, gone back in time ," I told her gently, "I wouldn't be here. And my Amestrian self would have died a miserable death, strapped in a wheelchair and shitting in a diaper and being fed mush by some condescending little nurse. My pride would have been taken from me. It was no way for a soldier to die."
Teddy stared up at me for a long time. Finally, she drew the silver pocket watch from around her neck and rubbed her thumb over the raised lion-de-mer crest. "Sometimes…when you talk like that….I can close my eyes and see him again."
"You loved him."
"In a way…yes." She looked thoughtful. "What I felt for him was my love for you and Edward's love for him….and…yes…there was a spark between us , so to speak. I came to him out of duty. An act of Tantric Alchemy. I came away from that experience whole and healed on many levels. I…I don't regret it…I don't think."
She touched her belly gently. "And I don't regret her. Not any more."
Dinner that night included a special surprise. "Taisa, Teddy tells me that this was your favorite dessert when Winry used to make it back in your college days." Remy shared a conspiratorial grin with Teddy. "Maman remembered this cake. They used to serve it at the fais do-dos on Saturday nights, only they called it Burnt Sugar Cake."
Behind her back, we used to call it 'Better Than Sex' cake. It's hard to describe if you've never tasted it. A buttery, rich yellow cake with a sort of not-frosting-not-exactly-fudge-not-quite-fondant glaze poured thickly over the top of butter and cream and caramelized sugar, and in the middle a delicious mess of that same glaze mixed with whole handfuls of chopped pecans.
Absolute bliss with a tall glass of ice cold milk—but since the appearance of milk in anything other than a baby's bottle provoked Ed to make theatrical gagging noises, we settled for vanilla bean ice cream, also home made.
Edward, cynical as ever, studied his slice with a jaundiced eye. "Can't be as good as Winry's," he groused.
I whacked him on his metal wrist with a fork. The tines vibrated loudly. "Shut up, Edward. Don't insult the cook." I nodded to Havoc's mother. "Itadakimasu, Jeanne-Marie-san."
After a few blissful bites, I leaned back and sighed. "Good as Mom's?" Teddy asked eagerly.
"Incredible." I told them solemnly, "I just saw the God that Edo doesn't believe in."
Alphonse was smiling widely. "Really, Nii-san. It's perfect!"
He scowled. "Bet it's not."
Jeanne-Marie faced him down. "Bet it is, you little—"
"Maman! Please!"
"—bet it's not," Ed insisted stubbornly. "Care to wager?"
"If it isn't, I'll personally wax your car. And if it is…." She shot me a conspiratorial grin, "you have to wait on Taisa, hand and foot, for the rest of the night!"
"Taken! And don't skimp on the third coat either!" He shoveled a big forkful into his mouth, prepared to fire off a stinging retort…
…then he slumped back in his seat. He closed his eyes. He chewed. Slowly—a first for him. After a while, he swallowed.
"Well??"
He buried his face in his hands. "Shit!"
Teddy and Remy hugged their maman. Al looked nostalgic and slightly misty-eye'd.
And I….got an evil idea. "Finish your cake, old man," I told my lover. "You've got a long night ahead of you." I cornered him when he skulked off to the kitchen for a refill of coffee. "Come here, Edward." I commanded.
Of course he ignored me—this is Edward, after all.
I grabbed him by his belt and yanked him around. "What the fuck do you want, Shithead?" he growed.
I held up a cautioning finger. "Ah-ah-ah! I don't want to hear a word out of you, Asshole. You just lost a wager in front of the whole damn family." I moved in closer and caught his ponytail with one hand, covering his mouth with the other. "Now," I leaned in, breathing softly in his ear, "you're going to make good on it, understand?"
His golden eyes went wide but he nodded. I backed him against the dishwasher with the pressure of my hips alone. He blinked, and I felt a slight shiver pass through him. He was getting the idea. Good. "Get in the shower, old man." I rocked my hips against his groin. "In fifteen minutes I want to see you naked, scrubbed from head to toe, laid out across the bed—and I don't want to hear one goddamned word out of you. You will be ready. You will be obedient. And," I moved my hand from his ponytail and laid it over his zipper, "you will be hard for me. Do you understand?"
I went back to the table, enjoyed another slice of that amazing Burnt Sugar Cake and a second cup of coffee. "Where's Nii-San?" Alphonse fretted.
"Scrubbing the shower, sorting the laundry, and hand washing my boxer shorts, after which he will make the bed—with hospital corners, of course—polish my shoes, dust my bookcase and clean the rat cage."
Jean-Remy and Teddy exchanged knowing smiles. "I think he's full of shit. D'accord, cher?"
Teddy winked at me. "C'est vraiment, mon amour. Need anything to tie him up with?"
Alphonse nearly inhaled his fork. Jeanne-Marie cackled wickedly. "Panty hose," she suggested. "It doesn't leave marks."
An hour later, I toweled my hair dry, brushed my teeth, slipped into my yukata and geta and entered the bedroom, waiting to see if the Fullmetal Asshole had actually obeyed me.
Well…sort of. He was only half hard, and he was pissed as hell. He opened his mouth to tear into me--and then obediently shut it. Glancing up at my traditional clothing, I saw his cock stir with renewed interest. Quickest way to get my lover in the mood is to either wear my native dress…or to put on something dark blue with a high collar, which no doubt reminds him of the uniform I wore during our days in Amestris. One of these days I'll get some cosplay tailor to make me a replica of my old military dress…and then I'll really wear him out…maybe over a desk or filing cabinet. Mmmmm. The thought of having Edward like that drew my immediate attention back to my own groin, which was screaming for attention.
Speaking of screaming…
Before I went back to the table I dished up a few scoops of that wonderful homemade vanilla bean ice cream into a porcelain bowl and stashed it in the freezer. It was still more or less frozen. I placed it on the bedside table. "You know, Edo, Jeanne-Marie's cake was very good…but I considered it part of the dinner. Dessert is something you savor afterwards." I tugged a pair of brownish wrinkled lengths from my pocket, the severed legs of a pair of donated maternity panty hose Teddy would obviously not be needing in a week or so. He stared up at me as I tied them in loose loops to the bed posts. "Your hands, sir," I ordered. "I won't tie you as long as you keep your hands on the post. Just slip your wrists through the loops…like so. Good."
From my other pocket I produced a corked bottle. It was labeled "Kama Sutra Oil Of Love", and when I tugged out the stopper we could both smell the delicious aroma of vanilla and cream. "I've had my pot roast and my carrots." I slid my feet out of my geta, kicking them under the bed. "I've had my coffee and cake." I lit the candles beside the bed and clicked off the light switch. Then, slowly, I untied my yukata. "Now, Edowado," I purred, "I want dessert."
I stood before my captive in the flickering candlelight, making him watch me, holding his eyes with my own. I dribbled a little of the sweet golden oil over my chest. "Do you like vanilla?" I asked him. "Some people say," my hands began to trail slowly down my belly, "That vanilla is synonymous with boring and unadventurous. I disagree." Another turn of the bottle. Rivulets of sweetness now trickled down below my navel. "You love chocolate. I know. But vanilla is a sensual journey all on its own." "Open your mouth," I ordered softly. I offered my finger. He grabbed at it frantically with his teeth, sucked it eagerly. "You like it, don't you?" He nodded, biting back a whimper. "Good." I leaned in closer, "You're going to have more…all you can take. Because tonight," I laid my hand on the inside of his thigh, "I…am…going…to make…you…melt."
"So," Alphonse asked nervously to the family lingering around the table. "Anybody up for a game of Uno?"
The very mention of the word up made Havoc blush and Teddy look wicked.
"Don' know about the children," Jeanne-Marie tossed a glance at the younger couple, "Look to me dey down for a leetle 'Go Fish'."
Teddy stood up abruptly, jerking Havoc to his feet. "And on that note," the Cajun grinned, "au revoir, chers!"
I don't believe in this seme/uke bullshit, not in my relationship. Ed does tend to be the aggressor much of the time, but it's more that 'I'm older and more worldly wise' crap than anything else. Ha! Considering that at the tender age of eighteen I went from absolute virgin to Tantric initiate in a triad with a man and a woman, I don't think he has jack shit to brag about. I lost my virginity to Mayland Hughes and Teddy Elric—abandoned it is more like it. Hughes nailed me first in early October of '75, and that Thanksgiving, on the night of the Beggar's Banquet, he guided Teddy and I into our first time together. I was inside her, he was inside me and believe me when I tell you, any innocence I might have had before that memorable night was chucked into the trash with the remainders of our feast.
This is the very reason why I love to turn the tables on the little bastard.
Goddam, I love this man. Feels like my heart is going to crack, going to split wide open. Like I can't hold it, all this emotion.. God, I have to hold him, have to taste his mouth, want to cry it feels so good…ohhh…ashiteru, my Edowado! I tell him, over and over. Love you…oh god…love you so much…
He is shouting so loud everybody can hear him. If Alphonse hasn't grabbed for his iPod, he will. Makes him embarrassed to hear us at play. Knowing Teddy and Remy, that Cajun's got his face between her legs right now or she's down on her knees, treating him to one of her truly artistic blowjobs…and I should know. I taught her how. As for Jeanne-Marie…hope she doesn't run out of batteries or she'll sprain a finger. There is so much Goddam sexual energy swirling through this room it feels like it will bleed through the walls.
And that's all to the good. There isn't enough love in this world.
And suddenly I'm the one who is screaming
Tearing the pillows out from under my love, I fall into his arms, not at all surprised by the tears that mingle with the sweat on my face.
I burrow my face into his chest and he cradles me tenderly, kissing my hair.
"You little shit," he whispers tenderly.
"Asshole," I murmur back, the taste of vanilla and my lover still sweet on my tongue.
And after a fuck of such epic proportions, only one thing could have dragged us, sticky and sore, out of bed and straight into our clothes:
The sound of Alphonse Elric going amuck in the kitchen, screaming, "THIS IS IT! OH GOD! THE BABY'S COMING!" as his newest grandchild prepared to launch herself into the world—into a family where love might not always meet all the proper guidelines and conventions but was absolutely guaranteed to last past death, through the Gateway, and Beyond…
…..TO BE CONTINUED…