In Shallow Seas We Sail
Author's Note: Back to regular updating, and I'm sure you all will be happy. As always, thank you so much for your responses. I'd love to know what you find interesting, and also, I love to hear your ideas of what you think is going to happen next! Even if it's not what I have planned, I still enjoy reading it.
Enjoy,
Sara
*
Just know that you can't
Take back what you said
Thoughtlife
[6]
When Cassidy finally left the room to fix supper for Clementine and herself, Sawyer scooted closer to Juliet, who had been noticeably distracted since she'd returned from Kate's room. Juliet regarded him carefully. "Just tell me," he said. It was obvious from her expression that something else had happened, but for some reason, she wanted to keep it from him.
"I think I know what's happening to her," Juliet said in a hushed voice. Neither of them knew how they would explain this all to Cassidy, and it was getting harder and harder to hide the truth. Sawyer knew Cassidy, and he'd assumed that even if they did tell her the truth, she wouldn't believe it for a second. Now, though, the situation was getting crazier, and he had several witnesses. He decided to see what the Doc would say in this matter.
Sawyer narrowed his eyes and looked at her closely. "You do?"
Juliet nodded. "While I was in the room with her, she was almost…almost having flashbacks. She talked to you, she talked…to someone else, maybe Jack. And when she came back around, she – she had a nosebleed."
Sawyer continued to stare at her, but soon the gravity of the situation hit him. "Nosebleed – are you tryin' to tell me she's time travelin'?"
"Well, obviously she's not time travelling. I believe her mind is. And because her mind can't physically transcend time, she's just jumping through things she's already experienced, namely things that happened on the island. The only thing I can't figure out – she said she talked to a man. She said she talked to Jacob. As far as I know, she never spoke with Jacob on the island, none of us even knew who Jacob was, or where he was."
"I've heard about him before, but what would he have to do with this?"
"He's…I don't know, he's the island's leader, or something. Ben spoke of him often, but I don't even know if Ben ever saw him. This Jacob made all the decisions on the island. Still makes them, I guess."
Sawyer remembered his own conversation with Kate. "When I spoke with her, she said she saw a man in her dreams. She said he wasn't on the plane, but she felt like she knew him from somewhere. She said he was the one that wanted us to come back." He shook his head. "This is crazy. This can't be happening."
Juliet twisted her hands together. "That's another thing…"
"What?"
"She told me – she told me I had to convince you to go back."
He was caught off guard. "Just me?"
"That's all she said to me, that I had to get you to go back."
Sawyer thought about this for a while, then forced a smile. "Well, at least you don't have to worry about ol' Ben coming back to take you."
Her expression showed that she was less than amused. "James – "
He reached over to grasp her arm. "Nothing's gonna happen. To me, to you, to anyone."
"You can't promise that," she said sternly, looking at him with big, steely eyes.
It was true, he couldn't promise. All he could do was hope. He did feel slightly relieved that Kate hadn't mentioned Juliet. If he could save her from going back to the island, he considered that a success.
"No, I can't promise. But I'll do everything in my power to make sure that nothing happens." He locked her gaze with his own, but she seemed less than hopeful. If the person pulling the strings really was Jacob, whoever and wherever he was, Sawyer could see that in her eyes, everything in his power wouldn't be good enough.
-
Kate stayed in the present until Jack's arrival, which was a relief. Just as they learned on the island, the less frequent the flashes, the better.
Sawyer found himself anxious. Without realizing it, he was waiting…waiting for the world to turn upside down like it had done for Kate. He felt his vision blurring at the corners, but each time, he would fight it off. At least, he believed he was fighting it off.
Jack finally arrived. He looked drawn and uneasy, almost as if he wanted nothing to do with Kate, but he couldn't keep himself away. Sawyer believed this was probably exactly the case. He behaved cordially toward Cassidy, who passed of Jack's apprehensive state as fear of being caught assisting a fugitive. She, no doubt, felt the same. She took Clementine upstairs so as to stay out of the way.
Jack grilled Sawyer and Juliet about Kate's condition, and they answered as best they could. Both relayed the experiences they'd had with Kate, and Juliet explained what she assumed the cause was. Jack accepted this diagnosis without question. It was really the only thing he could do.
Juliet went into Kate's room to bring her something to eat – a bit of macaroni and cheese that Cassidy had made for Clementine. As soon as she left the room, Jack turned toward Sawyer and spoke in a hushed whisper, "Is it happening to you?"
Sawyer repeated his lie. "No."
Jack's gaze bore into his. "Don't fight it, Sawyer."
Jaw clenched tight and eyes hard, he regarded Jack closely. "It's happened to you."
"Yes," Jack replied, though it was not a question.
"How bad?" Sawyer asked.
"Not bad, just flashes. One dream. That's when he told me."
"Jacob?"
Jack tilted his head. "Who?"
Sawyer realized they hadn't mentioned Jacob's name to Jack. "Kate said the man in her dreams, his name was Jacob. She said she felt like she knew him from somewhere."
Jack nodded. "I've seen him, too. I just," he sighed, "can't place his face. You've seen him, too?"
"No, no. I only saw – "
Juliet reentered the room, still holding the plate. "Says she's not hungry," she said, "Jack, she asked for you."
Jack gave a firm nod, thanked Juliet, and entered Kate's room.
Sawyer slumped back down at the couch and tried to process all he'd heard from Jack. How long would he be able to keep this from Juliet?
"Juliet," he said, suddenly curious, "What did Kate say to you? You said she was talking to me…"
Juliet smirked. "She said you taste like fish biscuits."
Caught somewhere between a laugh and a grimace, Cassidy's living room was engulfed in white light, and he was back in the cages. He felt a weight on his chest, and looking down, he realized Kate's head was resting there. His mouth formed the words he knew he would say, but he felt off, disjointed."Lemme ask you something, Freckles. When Blockhead was beating on me, and you said 'I love you.' That was just... to get him to stop, right?"
Kate raised her head and looked at him, and her only response was a kiss.
In his mind, he struggled, struggled not to be here because somehow, he knew this wasn't where he was supposed to be. But he didn't know where he should be. "I love you, too," his disjointed voice said, and it was all gone again in a flash.
*
"She said you taste like fish biscuits," she said, trying to force herself to be amused and not jealous.
He emitted somewhat of a choked laugh, one that she mistook for uneasiness at the situation.
"I disagree," she laughed, sinking down beside him.
He didn't move but stared straight forward. "Lemme ask you something, Freckles. When Blockhead was beating on me, and you said 'I love you.' That was just... to get him to stop, right?"
Freckles? "What?" Juliet blinked, touched his arm. "James?"
He remained staring straight ahead. His eyes were glassy, just as Kate's had been earlier. It became shockingly obvious that he was experiencing the same thing.
"James, come on," Juliet said furiously. Not him, too.
"I love you, too," he murmured in a low monotone.
Although he'd said the same to her, so many times before, but she knew he wasn't saying it to her. She stood. She knew he was experiencing a mind flash, but she couldn't sit around and watch him flash through his memories of Kate, as that had obviously been what had set him off.
Cassidy met her at the door. "Where are you going?"
"Cassidy, you need to go back upstairs," she said, trying to maintain some sort of composure. "Everything's okay, Jack is handling it, but I – I have to run to the store. It's just down the street, right?"
"Well, Allsup's, but it's just a convenience store and it's really expen—"
"It doesn't matter, just a quick run." She forced a smile and watched Cassidy go back up the stairs.
Vaguely, from the living room, she thought she heard, "Don't you let go, don't you leave me," but she was probably only hearing what she wanted to heard, and regardless, she didn't need to experience his grief when she did, inevitably, let go.
-
Once outside the house and down the street, she felt as if a weight had been lifted. She walked in the direction of Allsup's (at least, the direction she thought she'd seen it), but she didn't intend on going in. She didn't need anything besides time away from the island crazies.
After a couple of turns, she found a small little restaurant with metal tables outside. It was well-lit, and she pulled out a chair. It scraped the concrete angrily and a couple sitting nearby turned to look at him. She smiled weakly. After a moment, a skinny young girl appeared at her table with a shy smile. "Can I get you something?"
"Do you serve alcohol?" Juliet asked without hesitation, though she knew how bad it sounded.
"Um, no, ma'am, we don't. Is there – is there something else I can get you?"
"Coffee, please. Plenty of cream. That's all."
The girl left and returned shortly with her coffee and five small cream packs. Juliet quickly emptied them into her drink, but it was still too strong. She left it untouched and began to contemplate her situation. She felt horrible for abandoning them there, but she couldn't stay…not for any longer. She'd go back, of course, but she just needed some time.
Wrapped in her thoughts, she was hardly aware of another chair scooting across the concrete. She turned quickly and was looking into his spectacled eyes.
"Juliet," he said simply.
Her muscles tensed to flee, but for some reason, she was glued to her seat. Ben smiled slightly and slid a black camera across the table to her.
"What is this? How did you find me?"
"Juliet, I need you to go back with me, and I'm afraid this is the only way."
Juliet picked up the camera, which was already powered on and displaying a bright picture of a child playing in the park. "Julian," she breathed.