Hold On To the Intensity

by ClassicalyWrote

Sequel to Seeing Red: The first Installment to the story./ Kassia Hume learns the true meaning of betrayal. Nothing is what she thinks it once used to be. Secrets and lies come to light in one BIG facade. The only thing anyone can do is, hold on!

2. Chapter 2: Justified?

A/N: Hello readers. First of, thank you to the two reviewers of the preface. I really appreciate the feedback. :) Also thank you to those who put this on your faves/alert list. I love the support that you all give me. It only motivates the author. I do welcome reviews of any kind. My only rule is that you give a negative review in a respectful manner. I don't mind if you don't like something or a situation. By all means please voice that opinion. But I don't welcome flames. Those are hurtful. This story is hard work. I hope you like it. We are starting off to the night of the shootout in Billy Darley's "office".

I as usual would love to own Billy Darley and his mustang! Like I could if they were real, lol. He'd do the owning. ;) But sadly James Wan owns them and idea for the mustang. Some lucky dude or dudette won the car. Lucky! LOL. But, I own nothing. I only claim Kassia, Rowan and any other character that you did not see in the movie! I don't own the song used in this chapter either. That belongs soley to the wonderful band of Imogen Heap! Check em out! The song: The Moment I Said It-

So without my ongoing ramblings. I present chapter 1, but I call it 2. Enjoy!

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX

Rowan was still over Bodie. His sobs were quiet, but painful. He let his head drift from my thigh and he placed it inside of his brothers chest. "Bodie." He cried. The tears were falling silently on my face as he sat there and the cries got louder every few seconds. I didn't know what to do at this point. My hand raised to run across Rowan's neck, but I let it falter. It was after all my father who killed Bodie. It was starting to bring an ache into my chest now. There wasn't anyone left to help any of us now. All of Billy's gang was most likely dead. I leaned my head back into the air. Oh god. I started choking on my cries. Dad had taken everyone out for the family. I didn't know how to feel.

I looked up to the front at Billy. His eyes were pale now and blood was running from his arm. I got up slowly and left Rowan at peace with Bodie for now. Making my way to the front I had to swallow a lump as I saw the damage of Billy Darley. His entire front was covered with blood and it ran down his leg and hand, onto the floor. His left hand lay still and open on the wooden bench. "Oh fuck." I whispered. Rowan still inside of his own cries. I knew that he wouldn't be aware for a long while. Not having anyone left is too much to comprehend even...

I shut my eyes and held onto the bench as I set myself down beside him. Gathering all of the courage that I could muster at this point I looked beside me. Wasting no time looking slowly. He was a mess. Those once captivating eyes were now closed and hidden behind the pale lids. His chest was still. "I'm sorry," I whimpered quietly. "I'm so sorry that he killed your brother." And I turned my head and laid it onto the side of the bench as if leveling myself to talk to him. Everything was holding me and pulling me in all different directions. My family was murdered by this son of a bitch, but I felt a deep remorse for him. An understanding for his brother. I shook my head and shouted. "God damn it!"

I slammed my hand into the wood of the bench twice. "Fuck!" I cried out, throwing my head into my knee. Rowan was whispering silent into Bodie. "I'm so sorry brother. I shouldn't have. God. Man. I love you man. Come on please." He was pleading now.

I let myself cry finally into my knees. I brought them up to my chest and cried just like anyone would to hide themselves. And when I thought the tears would stop they didn't. They only got worse and worse as the seconds ticked by. But my crying fell silent as to not upset Rowan anymore right now. They say holding something in isn't good, but when it's protecting someone from anymore hurt then they have already hanging over their chest, it's justified. I brought my knees down and felt a humongous wave of emotion sweep over me and before I knew what was happening I slid across that bench and lay down in his lap. Still and now turning cold. But covered with blood. For a few moments I forgot everything and everyone and just went with what my emotions were making me feel. Rowan still over Bodie. I brushed my own hair back and lay down in his lap. The blood was staining my t-shirt and neck, but I didn't care. Leaning on someone right now helped. Even if they were dead. Even if they were murderous low life's. I let the tears fall silently. I heard Rowan sniff a tad bit and then I heard a mumbling as I lifted my head up. Looking behind me Rowan was still laying on Bodie, hugging him silently. My throat got caught somewhere in my chest and my level of adrenaline rose.

If it wasn't Rowan and sure as hell couldn't be Bodie then that meant? No, his injuries were too severe he couldn't be. I heard a coughing sound and I turned to look at his head with my eyes focused. "B-Billy?" I whispered in shock. "Are you?"

I looked to his body and sure enough the hand that was left spared twitched with life and recognition. I saw his eyes open and he squinted at first, but kept them fully open not faltering. "You." He spoke coughing as blood ran from his mouth. "Get me the fuck out of here. Now!"

I stared at him with disbelief. I was now feeling anger that my father hadn't succeeded!

"Why?" I questioned. Knowing I had the power now to leave him and the emotions that were flowing through me at this very second could be utterly impulsive and I would leave him here to die if I felt the fury over take me. I had power now. "Hume's are victorious aren't they?" At that point I heard Rowan snap his head up from Bodie and the impounding of footsteps were heard. Billy's eyes went weary. "No. Stupid," Billy stated. His voice weak, but clear. "I always have a fuckin' plan Kassia."

"Unless you want to feel even more w-worthless about yourself then I suggest you pick me up and get me the fuck out of here. Unless you forgot our d-deal." He finished coughing on his words. His eyes still and tried had a broken trace of darkness. "How?"

"Someone." His face smirked and twisted in pain. I pulled my hand up and slapped him across the face. "You fucking tell me now son of a bitch!"

"You know your r-right. You've got nothin' left to loose. Well, aside from, from l-loosing it all over again. Bodie and I made sure of that." He laughed darkly over the cough and blood now running from his nose. "Your friend OM. Been a little birdie of mine ever since his brother was fucked over."

His head lolled around forward as he tried to lift himself. OM? Who the hell do I know? No. He's pulling me damn leg. "You're loosing too much fucking blood." I scrambled on my words. I knew now what he was capable of.

OM? All I know is Owen Michaels. Huh? What?! As my face registered what just dawned on me in total shock I watched Billy's eyes grow dark. "He's been everywhere for me when I needed him to be. If I'd known he knew you before well.." He trailed off taking in a deep breath. "No. He- he wouldn't." I mumbled as my chin started to quiver. "He doesn't even know you so how could he?"

"Like I said bitch h- his brother." He coughed again.

"What makes you think I won't leave you hear fucker?" I stamped as the tears slipped from my eyes again. His head nodded back to Rowan who was bent down staring, just staring at his brother's lifeless face. I couldn't believe what I was hearing or seeing. "But he just lost his brother. Your brother. You're fucking best friend. Doesn't that mean a damn difference to you?!" I practically shouted, but forced it down. He knew he had me again. "There's nothing he can do either. And you're still mine! And I'll still set his ass straight for what he did. He's gotta learn. Bodie died," He choked on the words of Bodie and died. I knew it hurt him beyond any grief.

I shook my head not understanding why. "B-Bodie died for this life. And I'll be damned if Rowan gets off when he's alive. Bodie is gone there's nothin' he can do now." I closed my eyes. "You're.. god." I whispered silently running my hand up and down my arm.

"Daddy did a good job I'll give his ass that. Almost passed as Heco's friend." He smiled darkly.

"You fucker I'll-" I stopped when the tears caught up with my voice.

He gave me a look. Not knowing what else to do and feeling fury build against Owen, fearing my own sanity of what I'd do to that bastard if he was near me and my hands were free. No, they didn't need to be free to what I could do to him. I'd find a way. I'd learned how far grief and betrayal drives you. I ignored my conscience to look at Rowan. Battered and lifeless looking. He deserved life even if things would change now.

I was scared for Rowan and what grief could turn him into.

I wasn't ready to watch this happen to someone else again in front of my eyes.

I breathed in deep and Billy cleared his throat to motion Rowan over. He obliged to my surprise, but was like a lifeless corpse. That was how I described him now. Truly seeing what loosing someone means to you. It happens to you and hurts you even more to see the emotions of it, physical, mental to others. Especially when they are close to you.

The sun was clear over the sky again and I smelled the sun as it hit my face. Holding up the mess that was Billy was hard. I stayed with him in the back seat. Seeing his entire gang and the one lying in the glass outside was having its toll on him. There's where my mixed emotions came in. His eyes could do a lot of talking, but when he spoke I wanted to kill him myself. I knew that I might never be able to. Everyone's breathing was heard silently as Rowan drove with tears and each wave of sunlight that poured throughout the car with every turn he made. I held Billy's head on my lap as we were seated in the back seat. My own lips were chattering against each other.

Every time I would breathe in or yawn. One tiny motion of my face and it brought my lips quivering violently and had me crying all over again. The tears slipped from my eyes like ticking of a clock. I felt Billy shaking on me silently and I didn't know why but some reason my hand was stroking his face in a rhythm. Quiet and strong like my heart. I could feel it beating against my back. Something was happening to all three of us beyond the walls of this car. Branding us, changing us. We were all left with no one and none of us knew what to control anymore. One of us out for blood, one of us not knowing which way to turn, who to hurt next. And the other confused on mixed emotions and heart centered feelings.

Single lines notes played out as I started running my fingers across his neck. I looked down and to my unfortunate luck he was looking at me through the twisted pain. A knowing look in his eyes. That same one that led me to know he was tired and full of pain. No more wit left as of right now. For now.

The moment I said it

The moment I opened my mouth

Lead in your eyes

Bulldozed the life out of me

I know what you're thinking

But, darling you're not thinking straight

Suddenly things happen we can't explain

His spared hand let go of his fingers and reached out for my hand. And I let him take it, oddly appreciating the warm feeling of the blood. His body was getting colder by the second. If his life ended he wouldn't have a very good ending. It some instances of sparks in my mind I knew it wasn't fair. Life isn't fair. But things are preventable and fixable. He didn't deserve anything for his crimes. But what Rowan said to me made me think and I hated it even further more. He rubbed my hand with all the strength he could. "I did what I had to do." His hoarse voice slipped out. His delusions taking over. I knew his logic was slipping away from him and he was letting slip some of the things on his mind. "I don't feel remorse. I can't. You'll never fuckin' know..."

It's not even light out

But you've somewhere to be

No hesitation

No, I've never seen you like this

And I don't like it

I don't like it at all

Everything felt like it was moving faster now. It was as if Rowan's emotions closed him off, barricading him to the front seat. Billy and I were the only ones in the back seat now. Loosing all of our family, ones that meant the most to us all at once. The other taking that family, wiping them out from each other. "I never knew." He started to speak, but coughed up blood. I wiped my fingers across his lips not caring if blood soaked them.

His neck bounced up and down as he was trying to breathe. I pressed on his chest to help him. Part of me really needing and wanting to.

*~*~*~*

Rowan turned in silently to the hospital and helped me get Billy inside. A flock of doctors and nurses took him away immediately. Some with wide eyes and hesitation. They all rushed away and as I turned to speak Rowan brushed me off and just walked away.

Just put back the car keys

I stood alone in the middle of the hospital. And I started to wonder down the hallways of the north end. Billy was in the south wing under surgery. They asked if he had any family and that is when my heart hurt. He didn't. So I signed the forms, lucky to be eighteen now. I walked alone with my arms around myself through the hallways. As I stopped to stare out glass doors overlooking the now cloudy sky, hovering over the parking lot. I stared more into then I ever thought I could. Getting more out of the bigger darker picture. I heard the click of a tongue and recognized the hard cinnamon smell, but before I turned around the person jerked my shoulder. "Hey?" They called their heels on the cement floor permanent loud beats.

I turned around to the face of detective Jessica Wallis. "Oh god. Oh my god. Lowell. Lowell." She snapped her fingers as I just looked at her. So she found her missing prize. She's damned if she thinks she's getting anything from me. She looked at me from side to side shaking me a tad bit. "Kassia Hume. My god. We thought Darley murdered you. Jesus. What did he do to you?" Her look was frozen, plastered across her face. She was testing my anger with her smug pride now. She never helped us in the first place when she knew how dangerous this all was. Her promises of I'm gonna lock you up. Or why didn't she take us away from all of this so we'd be safe and Rowan would have his brother and I'd have mine.

Who are you calling at this hour?

Sit down, come' round, I need you now

"Your family they were looking for you." I shook my head at her. Past tense. No more...

"Your father and brother they. They're alive Kassia." Huh? No.

"No." My tone was harsh. "No they're not alive. No. Luke was. All rendered and I can't. Please just stop and leave me alone." I mumbled as the tears rushed to my lashes, numbing me.

"No. They are. Your father was hurt again, but he made it and your brother did too. He's showing signs now of movement if he has you-" She didn't finish her sentence as I turned on my heel, my heart pumping and started pushing open every door even when they hit the walls. "Where is he then?"

"Room 206." She answered simply, her heels following me and shouting something to her bastard partner. "Lowell get the.."

I didn't hear the rest as I neared that room ready for whatever heartache behind the let down. When I found the door I pushed it open. Only to see a dark blonde head of hair bent over the bed. She held a set of pink roses in her hand. "Tiffany?" I snapped gaping.

She pushed herself up quickly. From head to toe she was doused in designer labels as usual. Light lip gloss and pink eye shadow blended with black and blue. Her purple top too tight for her. Her nails black with blue dots on them and her channel ballet flats. She popped a piece of bubble gum. Brendan's girlfriend that he met through Amy at the Starfish Capital annual Christmas ball. Didn't even attend his funeral for that long.

I shook my head feeling the anger rise. "Oh Kassia." She threw her arms around me. "We all thought you were dead. Those horrible gangsters. The same ones who killed My Brendan and poor Lukey here. Your dad-" I pushed her aside and gasped. Luke was there. Lying in the bed draped with machines and cuts. I turned my head upon seeing his head. "Oh god." I grabbed his hand. "Wait a minute. You look fine to me. Oh my god are you kidding me? It was that Rowan guy's family wasn't it?"

Something about her erked me more than usual. She knew too much. And after Owen.

"Fuck off Tiffany." I snapped looking at her darkly.

"Make me." She threw the flowers down. "Your family is getting picked off like little bitches and your out screwing around on them nice turn Kassia you should-" I wasted no time as my new fury built and I swung straight to her face. I turned away from Luke, loosing my breath and walked over Tiffany's form on the ground. I walked down the hallway, covering my face.

We'll work it all out together

But we're getting nowhere tonight

Now sleep, I'll promise it'll all be better

Somehow in time

I walked past Wallis and back to the entrance of the hospital. I slumped into a chair in the general waiting area as people passed in and out sirens sounded off. I felt out of it. My brother was here, but he looked so. God I couldn't protect him.

It's not even light out

Suddenly, oh, you've somewhere to be

(Suddenly)

No hesitation

Oh, I've never seen you like this

You're scaring me

You're scaring me

You're scaring me to death

I felt my body slice up. Dad knew Luke was alive and he'd left him to become an orphan. How could he? He didn't learn. He still had Luke left and yet even if Luke was in a comatose state he couldn't stop. I didn't need to know the exact term of his state to know that he was hurt internally. If he woke up god he'd be a mess.

Don't

(Smash)

Please don't

( I do, please another one)

Smash

The people passed and everything ticked on. I knew Wallis was standing there watching me and I didn't know where Rowan had gone. I had no interest in finding my father now. I wouldn't be able to contain my words if I saw him. I didn't want anymore messes right now in life. I never thought that just forty-eight hours ago I would see life.

Someone tapped me on the shoulder and I looked up. "Miss? Are you here for Billy-" I motioned him quiet as Wallis maybe on stand by. I knew she'd be crawling hungry if she found out. "Yeah. How is he?"

"He's out of surgery. He's stable and looks like he was pretty lucky keeping all of his limbs and things. He'll make a full recovery, but I warn you like I warned him it won't be easy."

"Good." I mumbled getting up. "What room?"

"Uh room- room 404." I pushed aside the doctor as I made my way to the room. I peaked inside at his sleeping form. The tattoos clear under the hospital gown and some tubes hooked to him. The usual ordeal. I bent my head down when I heard someone speak. My heart jumped. "That bastard." Rowan grits his teeth. "I can't believe. I mean Joe. Then Bodie. He deserves to have someone rip that fucking plug from his nose." He started to move forward and I felt that fear throughout me. I pushed on him. "Rowan don't. No. It won't do any good; it won't bring Bodie back. I'm sorry."

"Sorry?" He looked at me in disbelief. "He's not the only one at fault. Bodie shouldn't have and died and I am going to make sure he gets what he deserves. His life livin' on."

"Rowan no. You can't."

"Why not?" He yelled. "Everyone else can. Be free too."

"Because I've seen what grief does Rowan. I'm scared. I've watched how it transforms people before my eyes. And I won't let it happen to you." His eyes stared painfully into mine before he grasped me by the shoulders and pushed me as hard as he could into the wall. He stormed off without so much as looking back. I felt the wind knock out of me as I hit the floor. People stared as they walked by. Oh god not Rowan. How can this all happen. How can things go from bad to worse when. You can always make the situation much worse.

I pulled myself up with tears and I heard that deep familiar voice speak out tiredly. "You can't change him."

"Go to hell." I whispered.

I'm loosing you

I'm loosing you

~*~*~*~*~*

Tiffany was gone by the time I peered back into Luke's room. I heard that tongue click before Wallis spoke. "You know you could've said something. Somehow. You're a smart girl Kassia." She spoke as I rubbed Luke's hand. Shut your mouth Wallis.

"Shame too. Your Dad had half of his family left and it was off somewhere else, just like Miss Londa said." I stood up with anger. "Someone really needs to shut you up. Speaking of someone not doing their job." I placed my hands on my hips.

"You have no idea what powers you're messing with Miss Hume." She spoke.

"Right. Go have a doughnut and get laid Jessica." I barked. Her lips pulled together and before another word left her mouth I decided against letting her have the last say. I threw my already swollen fist into her face and she fell to the floor. Making a clatter. Anyone who fucked with me today would have no second chance if even a first. I turned back to my brother as I heard her get up and rub her jaw. "Well. I'm going to check on Mr. Hume and you better pray that I can't get a warrant for your arrest."

"Get on your own knees Wallis." I spoke looking to Luke's face.

When I heard the door close I smirked before it faded as I looked to Luke. "I'm so glad to see you Lukers. I thought I'd lost you forever. They took me and I couldn't get to you. I swear if I could have then I would have. You mean everything to me. More than anyone. My favorite brother forever." I wiped the tears with my sleeve and held onto his hand as I lifted it slightly in the air. "You gotta wake up for me. I need you so much." I cried. "Luke I'm so sorry that I didn't say anything when I knew what dad was doing. When I feel remorse for the ones that tore us all apart for good. And mom. I know she would be here if she could. God I miss her too." I found it easy to pour myself out to Luke no matter what state he was in, yet so hard now.

When he lay unmoving I slid the floor with his hand.

Trust me on this one

I've got a bad feeling

Trust me on this one your gonna throw it all away

"Please wake up. Oh god I need you Luke. I need you so much. I lifted myself up to the white edge of his bed and cried into it. I let myself cry now not fearing anything. Thinking about my family once again and myself. "Luke please." I cried. I felt a twinge in my hand. "You gotta do more that move Lukey. You've gotta wake up for me. I promise I'll take care of you." My mouth agape and tired. I heard a hoarse sound that made my head snap up. "Luke?" My breath caught and speech was rendered. I watched his purple/pale eyelids flicker a few times before they opened and I could see the familiar green in them. My mouth fell open with a cry. "Oh. Luke."

"K-Kass." His eyes watered up as the tear slid down his pale cheek. "I love you." He spoke the words straight.

With no hesitation

Smash

Bye, bye, bye

Bye, bye, bye

Bye, bye, bye

My lips pushed together as I lifted my head up to the sky. "Thank you." I whimpered as I held onto his now moving hand in mine.

XxXxxxxxxxxxxxXXXX

So, whatcha think? I've got about four more chapters for this story written but I'm only posting them one at a time. Anyways, this story is an emotional rollar coaster. And it only gets even more intense from here. Hence the title of the story, lol. Review if you will. I want to know what you all think. Happy late Merry X-mas and New Year. - Kris