Brooke's POV
It has been four months since I found out I was pregnant, and one year since I gave birth to Myles. Today is an especially sad day because we should be celebrating as a family, celebrating our boy turning one. Instead, Lucas, Lola, Maia and I are going to the cemetery. I have flowers and a teddy bear. I kneel in front of the headstone. Lucas kneels beside me. Lola and Maia are standing off to the side. I place the flowers down and kiss my fingers. Gently, I place my fingers on the headstone.
A tear falls down my cheek and Lucas wipes it off. I look at him and he is crying too. I hadn't seen him cry since just a few months after Myles's death. I hold him tight and he places his hand on my growing belly. I can't believe that in just five months, I will have a new baby to take care of, a new baby who will never know Myles. I look up at Maia, almost 15. She looks so grown up and I wonder if she didn't get a real childhood because of our situation. In her early years, we were like two friends. When Lucas and I got back together, she got to be a kid. She played ball and had two parents, not an older friend. Then, when Lucas left again, she took care of Lola, and that hadn't been fair. She had been so responsible, too grown up for her age. I wanted her to go out and have fun.
I looked at Lola, she was like an angel. She looked at me with eyes that matched my own and I pulled her into a hug. In just a month she would be five. She was starting first grade next year, she was getting so big.
I looked back at the grave and wondered what Myles would look like. Would he be a daddy's boy or a momma's boy? Would his hair have been like mine or Luke's? Would he joke or be serious. All of these questions had no answer. I would never know what he looked like or how he would act. I cried for a while longer and then we made our way home, the four of us. I hoped that the baby I was carrying would be healthy and that he or she wouldn't have to fight to survive. I never wanted to lose a child again. I wanted to live first nights at home and first birthday celebrations. I wanted to hear first words and laughs and see first smiles and steps. I wanted to see school plays and sports games. I was ready to see my new baby.
When we got home, Lola and Maia took Spencer outside to play in the yard. Greg came over and joined them. I looked at Lucas.
"What?" He asked smiling at me
"I'm ready to start getting the nursery ready for the new baby."
"Really?" He asked, excited.
"Yeah, I'll always miss Myles, but the new baby isn't going to wait until we're ready for it."
"I love you Brooke"
"I love you too Lucas" And then we kissed.