Flooded ch. 9- Feelings and surgery

Wilson started the conversation. He knew House would stay silent, but he could see the emotion bottling up inside him and he was ready to let House rant.

"So what are you feeling? I can see it in your eyes House."

"I'm pissed."

"At who?"

"Are you ready for this? You know it's gonna come out fast and loud and directed at you."

"Yes I'm ready."

"I'm pissed at myself. I don't resent you or Cuddy for being able to walk while I have a limp. I'm pissed at myself because I chose the Ketamine and it opened a window of what it was like before the infarction and I got too used to that. That window slammed and smashed into a million pieces and my fucking life took a 180 turn and now I'm back to where I was at the infarction years ago. I have to deal with surgery and hospital beds, pain medication, rehab and my over sensitive over helpful friends that I don't want to push out of my life, but will probably try to at least once, all over again. It was hard enough the first time, do you think I want to do that again, or even see what its like all over again?"

"I understand the stress and all the crap that comes with this. It will be different this time. The surgery won't be as invasive, the rehab will take a week or two maximum and your friends are defiantly not leaving even if the threats come and the curses come out, we are staying here for you, no matter what. We won't pull a Stacy and we will help you through this."

"That's right House, we aren't leaving and it will be better than last time." Cuddy had arrived back from the cafeteria with lunch and drinks. House looked like hell, but his eyes said that he felt better now that he had all his anger off his chest. Wilson decided to go for a little humor before lunch.

"House would you put on a t-shirt before you scare someone?"

"Sure Jimmy" he said with a smile "Why don't you wrestle up a t-shirt for me?"

"Sure thing."

They sat and had lunch, Cuddy carefully monitoring his pain meds and saline drip. Since House was to have surgery that night, he couldn't eat lunch with them and had to settle for ice chips. They discussed the surgery and who would be performing it. Cuddy had pulled a few strings and got an OR for late that same night. That way the staff would be minimal and House would stay secret. They would be able to leave the hospital in two days, and Cuddy could keep them under cover until then. Wilson was to take the Tuesday off, Cuddy the Monday since she would stay for the surgery, and together they would get him home that Tuesday night. They were all glad that there were three of them, Cuddy and Wilson could take shifts if needed and it was easier to cover why they were taking off work for a little while until House was ready to tell all what had happened. The only people who would really need to know were Chase, Cameron and Foreman, all of which would be informed by Wilson on Thursday whether House was ready or not. They all hung out for the remainder of the day, Wilson had to get back to his house at around 8 and Cuddy stayed through until Monday morning.

The surgery began at 7:30 and Wilson stayed with Cuddy until 8. They were both worried, but they sat quietly together, hoping for the best and dreading the worst.

"He's a trooper Lisa; he'll pull through just fine."

"I know but that doesn't stop me from worrying about him."

"Me neither. Make sure you get some rest tonight."

"I'll try, but you know that will be near impossible. House will be asleep all night but that won't stop me from checking on him."

"Yeah I doubt I'll sleep, so you might see me later tonight, if that's ok."

"Yeah, you know where we will be. Good night James."

"Good night Lisa, call my cell when he's out of surgery with an update."

"Will do. Thanks for everything."

"No problem."

Cuddy wasn't sure what do you with herself after Wilson left. She knew that he was going to be fine, but that didn't help ease her worry. She got coffee and tried to read but mostly sat and thought about House and how much she actually liked him, maybe even loved him. If she could worry this much about someone, maybe there were serious feelings there. The surgeon came out and found her around ten. He said everything went well, no complications. He should be home in two to four days providing that his pain was manageable and with little rehab he should be back to normal in three weeks. She was relieved that she could see him again and that he would be ok. She went back to the room to wait for him. On her way she called Wilson to update him. He was just as relieved that everything was fine and told her that he would come by tomorrow morning to see them both.

She arrived at the room and was glad to see that the staff had brought up the cot she had asked for. House's room was big enough to fit a bed for her too and she wasn't leaving him tonight, he might still need her. He arrived groggy and half asleep. She made a mental note of what medications he was on and the levels in his IV. She stayed up as long as possible to make sure that he was ok, after a half an hour he didn't awaken and she figured that he was out for the night. She gave herself the ok to try to sleep for a little while and was asleep within ten minutes. The day had been almost as stressful for her as it probably was for House.