Nameless One: Once again, WELCOME to Fire! I hope you have a pleasent stay, and thank you oh so very much for reviewing!! It makes me glow.
Jedi-Lover: I'm glad you're enjoying it! I'm sorry it's rather late, but, I do have one more chapter after this one already written/beta'ed! Go me!
SailorLeia: Several things dear.
1. Please, call me 'Mel'; Jaid Ziaen takes far too long to type, don't you think?
2. I. Love. Your. Reiviews. They're so long and beautiful! I'm serious, they make me feel so much better about my writing.
Excellent, excellent, excellent, EXCELLENT... on and did I mention this story is EXCELLENT.
uhm.... No, but please feel free to! ::teases::
There is nothing wrong with drama!
Beyond that I was convinced I couldn't write it... no, there's not!
I still love this story!
Aww! You're going to make me say "squee" if you keep that up!! And now I'm blushing.... ::hugs::
You worried me for a moment when Mara said the four dreaded words for any relationship married or not... "We need to talk!"
Mwahahahahaha! I loved writing that part! My beta almost killed me for writing it though, cause originally I had a conversation between Mara and Leia in there and the part where she tells Luke that they need to talk was going to be... THE END....
....but I decided not to.
Never should have doubted your planning gunius for a second!
No, you shouldn't have, but if you doubt me, then you'll review and then I'll feel so very very happy about everything!!! Well, mainly you, my writing and this fic but... hey! Isn't that what It's all about?!
Keep up the great work, and thank you for being so nice in your answer! Your wonderful!
Aww... Sweetie, you're way too generous! I love IR's, I almost prefer writing them to reading new reviews - does that show you how much I love them? Hell, if you'll take five minutes to review Fire, I sure as hell can take ten to give everyone an IR. Unless I have to go somewhere. But that's rather rare.
CeeKay:
How can you write this stuff and tell me not to cry?!
...Um.... I'm.... a hypocrit? >:) ---devil face!
The roller coaster ride in this chapter is almost painful.
There's a chapter coming up that's twice as bad as that one was... (it's almost half way done, only the angsty part too! must work on the semi-fluff part... wooo...)
I'm so glad you're reading! It makes me feel so happy, CeeKay!! ::hugs::
A/N: Hey guys! Sorry about the delay, see, I forgot last week that I had the SAT on Saturday, so I didn't study untill like WEDNESDAY!?!?! Ah! Even for a homeschooler, it was really really dumb. So, I basically shut off my computer (although I did check my email) and did nothing. I've had this chapter sitting here for a while, in the "manage documents" section I mean, but I wanted to make sure I could do IR's for you guys so I refused to put it up! I'm sorry if it was a mistake... I hope you like this chapter! It was rather fun to write.
Chapter Three
.
-
.
That night, Mara and Luke lay side by side in bed, one asleep, and the other wide awake. Mara lay with her arms tucked around herself, and her eyes fastened on the clock beside the bed, Luke's hand resting on top of her hand in his sleep. The entire sky was filled with dark, angry clouds that poured down sheets of unforgiving rain. The occasional headlights from speeders shone through the large windows that spanned the outside wall, throwing contorted shadows across the walls and sending shivers down her spine.
An ominous crack of thunder, followed distantly by a flicker of lightening made Mara jump nervously, and tug the blankets up a little higher with her free hand. The rain fell faster as she simply stared, wide-eyed at the dreary world outside.
It looks like life. Mara compared dully, So full of dark and ugliness...
Mara could feel the despair sinking into her soul; the unworthiness that was the epitome of her life; the self loathing that, the inescapable knowledge that she was nothing more then a bleak, empty failure to the two men whose admiration she had ever wanted. But it obviously was too much to wish for; someone with her past could never - should never even dream about being valued by others. After all, it was the people who were successes were valued. When you were nothing more then a failure, a miserable hopeless failure, hoping for the impossible would only end in pain. And pain was something she knew very well.
Mara rolled over so she was looking at Luke instead of out the window, straining with every little ounce of her will to keep the dark emotions inside of her at bay. Something that was proving to be impossible when confronted with the freezing world outside of their apartment.
Mara squeezed her eyes tightly shut, wishing that she could attack the doubts and fears physically, as if they were nothing but an opponent in a fight. The warm arm that had curled around her, tightened slightly and she opened her eyes with a small sigh.
Luke lay on his side, facing her. Mara sighed as she simply stared at him, admiring the way his pale skin glowed in the moonlight, how the gentle structure of his face threw weird shadows across his face. His dark blonde hair was an absolute wreck and was falling into his eyes. A ghost of a smile flitted across Mara's lips and she reached over and brushed some of the unruly strands back on his forehead, relishing the shivers that skittered down her spine when she ran her hands through his hair.
How can they be so different?
The chill that sank into Mara was unexpected as it was unwelcome. What am I doing? she wondered, both scared and worried at the direction her thoughts were headed. Luke is nothing like the Emperor...
Ah, but he was the first Force powerful being you met after the Emperor died, a coldly logical part of Mara's mind contradicted. It is safe to reason that a bond as strong as the one that you shared with the Emperor would cause severe backlash when severed, and one of the consequences very well might've been to reestablish the bond that had been destroyed with someone else. It is entirely possible that Luke realized this and simply twisted it.
Luke would never do something like that!
Because... he's too understanding?
He's Luke. He can't help being so understanding.
Ah. And how was he being understanding when he constantly was trying to change you? Constantly trying to make you into what you feared most? Trying to re-create you?
He-he didn't know…
The Almighty Jedi Master? Not know? Hah! You delude yourself. You're nothing more then a project. A mission. A job. And probably the one and only failure that he's ever seen. Even Vader was a bigger success after all – didn't he manage to overcome his silly fears and become a Jedi? Even though he knew the risks better then you did?
Luke isn't like that…
Oh?
He's… he's…
He's a Jedi. You are not. It's as simple as that.
No…
------
Luke opened one crystal blue eye, and then the other, disturbed by the flailing emotions that swirled in the Force around his sleeping wife. "Mara?" he whispered sleepily, pushing himself up onto his elbow. "You're shivering. Mara? Are you alright?"
Mara didn't seem to register what he was saying. Her glassy green eyes continued staring unseeingly at Luke's face, her unhealthily thin form wracked with shivers that refused to subside, even though she had the blankets clutched to her chest.
"Mara?" Luke asked, growing panicked when Mara failed to respond. He lifted a hand to her face, brushing her glinting strands of hair away from her parted lips. The backs of his fingers lay against her cheek for a brief moment, and he was suddenly struck by a feeling of absolute wrongness.
Her face was cold. Not like the kind of cold that you get from being in low temperatures, but a grey sort of cold, that meant something was very wrong.
Luke slid his arms under Mara's trembling form, pulling her close to his chest as he clambered out of bed, his destination fixed firmly in his mind.
His wife needed to go to the medward. Again.
-----
The terrifying dreams that had held Mara enthralled hid deep in her mind as awareness slowly crept through her body.
Warm.
She was warm.
Beating.
Luke.
Mara curled her fingers into the shoulder of Luke's tunic, mewing faintly. Luke froze, his swift stride checked at the slight movement from the woman in his arms.
"Mara?" Luke whispered softly, his blue eyes hopeful as he looked at her bowed head. "Mara? Can you hear me?"
"Yes," Mara whispered back, her throat stiff with echoes of terror. "What-what's going on?"
"You were cold, and you weren't blinking so…" Luke trailed off, suddenly realizing how idiotic his reasons sounded. "Uh – I was taking you back to the medward?"
"Oh," Mara tried to say, but Luke shook his head.
"I won't leave you in the medward," Luke said firmly. "I promise."
Mara's heart twisted and she knew that she was worrying him. Damn you! she cursed herself. It's not enough that you're a disappointment, you have to make his life hell too?!
"I'm sorry," Mara said in as strong a voice as she could manage. "It's nothing; really. I was just trying to meditate on some memories. I didn't mean to worry you."
I'll be good, Mara vowed to Luke as he carried her easily down the hall, heading for the medward. I'll be okay, and I'll succeed this time – I won't fail again, I promise, Luke. I won't fail you.