Disclaimer: None of the characters depicted in the following stories belong to the Author, and no money is being made from this work.

"They are women, thus no matter how much you plot and plan, you as a man, will lose."

Parable

The Gods hated him.

Zuko just knew they took pleasure in his misery; there was no other possible explanation. With Uncle Iroh on the throne and successfully leading peace talks with the other nations, Zuko did not have much to do with his newly reinstated title as Prince.

Other than furthering his family line, which was the little seed of his little problem.

Not to say there weren't willing women; the court ladies practically threw themselves at his feet, but in truth, none of them were worth even a simple thought. In reality his list of possible wives was the daunting number of two, regardless of what the elders said.

Mai.

And Toph.

It was hard to describe his position. Mai had held a spot for him in her heart. She had secretly aided him even while under Azula's control. Truth be told, he would not mind marrying her, she was beautiful, a Fire Nation noble of sufficient rank to become Fire Lady, and (he wasn't sure what to think of this) a trained assassin.

Toph… It was hard to describe Toph. She was brash, loud and cynical, and an Earthbender and would likely give a majority of the Elders a heart attack should a proposal be made (which on second thought seemed like a serious benefit to consider). The thought of such a vociferous reaction from the regal and arrogant Elders would have Iroh laughing for hours. She was entirely inappropriate for a Fire Lady, but she understood him. The kisses, their small moments of quiet togetherness, were in direct contrast to the utter verbal (and physical) brutality she could (and would) put him through if he became too broody for her tastes.

They knew of each other, they knew their positions relative to him. Since moving into the palace along with the Avatar and his entourage, they had treated each other like wary cats keeping their distance until their inevitable showdown.

The pressure had gotten to him, and in a lapse of sanity he tricked them both and locked them in a room so they could just get it over with. One hour since that fateful occurrence had been marked by the sun, and the young prince slowly approached the door berating his stupidity at his own actions. He had come to the conclusion that the Gods hated him, expecting with a certain amount of clarity and foreknowledge that there would be blood spilled, likely lots of it, along with… creative redecorating.

Instead, peeking in at them, he saw them smiling (Mai never smiled, or showed anything other than boredom) and Toph laughing (Toph laughed, but never like this, soft sweet and feminine).

They were discussing history, history that Zuko knew but had forgotten, about the times before the war. To be specific they were discussing the marriage practices of the Fire Lords before the war had begun. The polygamist marriage practices.

Shocked as he was morally at this he could barely contain himself as he stepped away from the door and began to pace, attempting to organize his thoughts. He heard the door latch begin to open and panicking, attempted to rush away only be knocked down by a wall that hadn't been there a few seconds prior.

His eyes snapped open from his position on the floor as the voice of a slightly amused Mai reached his ears.

"Perhaps you would like some refreshments to cool your throat before you would like to join the Lady Beifong and I in a conversation I'm sure you will find interesting."

Mai was smiling as realization came to Zuko, the knowing smile of a predator that had finally gotten particularly elusive prey within its grasp. Behind her Toph was staring at him with blind eyes, a wide smirk on her face.

Manfully trying to regain his dignity from his position on his back, he stood and stepped into the room. The sound of the door locking behind him made him reiterate his previous statement as he walked to his imagined doom.

The Gods must really hate him.

fin

AN: Really late, and in my opinion not well done at all, but I may as well toss it out to the wolves and see what comes of it. Happy October people.