A/N: I have no words for how horrible this chapter was. Two non saves and losses of information - a million typos and I want to rip my hair out. So I fixed, and rewrote and there's probably a ton of typos - which I am such a freak about, I loathe them - but I'm tired and just posting it now. Sigh. So some of you know who the killer is- the conclusion to the casefile portion of it will be done soon. But it won't be the end, naturally it's just a means to an end. The shippy stuff - the real good stuff- won't happen til after anyway, so non shippers are warned, once the arrest is made, stop reading. Also, I hate the title of this fic. I almost always use song titles for my fics, but I didn't want to this time, and now it's driving me insane. Once again, thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter- I appreciate it muchly.

Disclaimer: Insert thought about how we all wished we owned it here.

The IA building was brightly lit and badly laid out. Not that the MCS was laid out better, but she enjoyed the open feel of it, she liked the windows and the open floor concept. IA was the direct opposite, narrow dark corridors leading to tiny shut off offices, and as a result people scurried up and down the halls as they walked towards Det. Smyth's office. "Like rats in a cage." She muttered darkly to herself. Bobby's chuckle from behind her didn't really shock her though.

When they arrived at his office, she was the one to knock sharply, once and then again when there had been no response for a few moments. His superior officer had told them he was in, so she sighed slightly- she wasn't really in the mood for this, and knocked again, more loudly – adding a 'NYPD' in a forceful tone. Finally the door was opened by an irritated looking man, whose shirt was unbuttoned halfway, and his dark hair was disheveled and he wore a thunderous expression.

"What?!" He snapped, clearly annoyed. Alex simply rose a brow, taking in the rest of his appearance. His pants were slightly off center and he had no socks or shoes on.

"I'm Detective Eames and this is Detective Goren-" she spoke in an abrupt tone, not really in the mood to coddle what could be their top suspect. "We're from MCS – we're investigating a series of murders, and we need to speak with you."

Smyth frowned, his face coloring slightly in anger, before he finally shrugged. "Fine. But give me a minute." And without another word he slammed the door shut in their faces. Bobby looked down at her, waiting.

"What?"

"Aren't you gonna-" he waved a hand at the door expressively "-say something about that?"

"What I'm so predictable now that you wait for my jokes?" Her voice was irritated and she glared up at him. "Fine what would I have said, Mr. Knows me so well he can predict my one liners?"

"I don't know- I don't really have a sense of humor." He glanced down at her as he spoke and she rolled her eyes.

"Fine. It would have been along the lines of me counting down to the woman's exit, or speculating since no woman has appeared that he was doing a tango for one- I had something much better planned, but you went and ruined the mood." She elbowed him lightly as she spoke and he chuckled. Just then the door flew open again and a woman dressed impeccably exited and strode down the hall. Bobby leaned over her shoulder a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.

"Always go with your first instinct. She looks like another Detective-"

"Kinda hypocritical don't ya think? Smyth judging fraternization when he seems to not mind indulging in it himself?" She smiled tightly as the door opened again, this time revealing Det Smyth , fully dressed – thank God.

"Are you coming?!." He spoke roughly, and she fought the urge to giggle like a 12 year old girl. I think you've taken care of that for us Smyth. He strode into the office, and sat himself at his desk, waving a hand to indicate the chairs empty in front of them. It wasn't a large office, but there was a sofa off to one side that she avoided staring at, and the larger desk, which she seated herself in front of. Bobby – speaking of predictable- was wandering the room, bending over bookshelves and studying the diplomas on the wall.

"Thank you for seeing us." Her voice was a tiny, tight coiled thing – and he eyed her warily like she was a snake about to strike. "I'm sure you've heard of the two recent murders of two officers? Interestingly enough, we uncovered that you investigated both sets of partners just weeks prior to their murders."

"Yeah I heard. People whispering about a serial cop killer" His tone was brusque and uncaring and she fought the urge to reach across the desk and smack the man. "So what-" He jerked open the drawer in his desk, shifting through files quickly. "-You want my impressions of the two sets? Why I didn't charge them? What were the names again?" He spoke in a slightly bored tone and she gritted her teeth tighter.

"Collier and Casas, and Yellis and Jones." He nodded, thumbing through files and finally pulling out two slim folders.

"Alright-" his tone was rushed, as if he just wanted to get this over with, but nothing in his manner indicated any type of guilt- or anything else other than the fact that he was clearly an asshole. "-Collier and Casas – no evidence. I interviewed several people they had worked with on cases, and no signs of unprofessionalism. They were never caught outside of work- just a hunch their Captain had- so as per procedure I was only able to review their work related procedures- not their personal ones. If you ask me though, they were involved. But there was no evidence, no co workers would back it up- so it got shelved." His tone was impersonal and clipped, like he was reciting something he knew by heart.

"And Yellis and Jones?" She questioned shortly, making notes in her book as he spoke.

"They were reported seven times- once again, all work related reports. None of their co workers saw them intimately engaged, or otherwise – so I was reviewing their work history alone. And again, I got the best of reports on them. Completely professional conduct- even when I interviewed them. After the third report, the partners we investigate get a heads up and get interviewed." He shut the folder in front of him and glared at her across the desk.

"So if a set of partners are reported, they wouldn't know the first two times?" Bobby's voice rumbled from across the room, and Smyth lanced over in surprise. Apparently he had forgotten Bobby's presence.

"No." Smyth answered shortly. "I investigate over 500 complaints a year, detectives. If the partners knew, they could hide it – that's why we don't let them know. I'm sure that some people would be appalled to know they'd been reported." He had a strange look on as he spoke, a certain sly tone to his voice and she frowned thoughtfully. It almost sounded as if he were suggesting-

"Could we have a list of the complaints you've looked into over the last few months?" Bobby spoke politely, and Smyth laughed outright, a strange barking sound.

"Hell no, you can't. You get a warrant and I'll give it to you- but no judge is gonna open sealed fraternization complaints based on a connection between two dead cops. Now if that's all Detectives- I have important work to get back to-"

She stood, promptly, and nodded at him. Smiling slightly she paused at the door. "We'll see you soon Det. Smyth." Pulling open the door she stepped through, Smyth's laughter following her down the hall.

"Don't forget your warrant!"

"So we have no grounds for a warrant- and basically nothing to do until another set of bodies show up?" She sighed in frustration, glaring at the phone Bobby had just hung up as if she could physically harm Carver through it.

"I'm sorry Eames-"

"It's not your fault Bobby. We need those damn files though- I mean- God, as much of a snake as Smyth was-"

"You don't think he's the killer?" Bobby finished for her. She nodded slightly, leaning forward and resting her forehead against the pile of files scattered across the table in front of her. Her hair hung around her face like a curtain, and all she wanted to do was clear this case off their desk. She wanted this guy caught- and caught yesterday. "I don't either- he's not what I'd call a shining addition to the force, but I don't think he killed these guys- for one thing, Smyth seemed the type to want a fight from his victims-"

"And our guy had to subdue them." She finished tiredly, still in her prone position. Tilting her head slightly she looked at Bobby who was seated next to her. "But why? Why subdue them?"

"Perhaps it's a woman. Or it could be someone without the physical strength to complete the task- an injury, or they could be of an older age, or-"

"Oh my God Bobby- You're a genius!" She shot up, her body tight with excitement as she stared at him. "We know it's someone who has access to files right? How many people could have access right now – because the reports were only made a few weeks ago- plus be a female or injured male? If we pull out all of the files of officers who work with or have access to IA files-"

"And cross reference old injury with it-" Bobby was staring at her as he spoke now, his eyes light and his fingers drumming on the surface of the table. "But the search is too specific- the computer would never be able to-"

"No but we could. All we need is a list of people with access to those files. Then we go through them-"

"We get a suspect." He finished thoughtfully. Glancing at the clock behind her, he frowned. "It's gonna take a while- and we'll need two laptops- I'll see if I can go steal one from CITU-" he was out the door before he even finished the sentence and she rolled her eyes, picking up her cell phone.

"I'll get food."

Four hours later, her eyes felt like they were burning out of her head, and she was beginning to hate the glow of her computer screen. Bobby sat across from her with the borrowed laptop, and his head was resting in his hand heavily- in fact, she wasn't entirely sure if he was awake. She hadn't heard any clicks of his keys for a while now. Ignoring him, she let him take the small nap, knowing she would probably need one later as well. The search had kicked back no less than 412 individuals within the Force with access to those files. She sighed, and leaned back, stretching her arms above her head and moaning slightly.

Sighing she stuck her tongue out at the computer screen for a moment, screwing her face up and glaring at it. A chuckle surprised her and she leaned to the left to see Bobby smiling as he watched her. "I don't think that's the proper search technique." He spoke softly, as if the silence of the room had affected his speaking voice.

"You were supposed to be asleep." she whispered back fiercely, annoyed at being caught.

"I never sleep- you know that." She rolled her eyes at this statement and frowned thoughtfully.

"This is taking forever." She clicked to the next file as she spoke, her eyes scanning the pertinent injury section. She was barely reading the names at this point, just flagging files of women and men with injuries and moving on. She had no idea how many they had flagged together, but she figured another hour and they'd have their flagged stack to go through more thoroughly.

"Look at the bright side- at least we aren't pulling these files by hand." He chuckled slightly as he spoke, and she stared at him for a beat before shaking her head and carrying on. The monotony of the click, scan, flag, discard was interrupted a moment later as her phone buzzed and she glanced down startled. It was now close to nine pm, and she knew it wouldn't be her family, and she felt his eyes watching her as she unclipped her phone and looked at it as if it was a foreign instrument for a moment.

"You flip it to answer." He offered in a helpful whisper, earning a glare from her, before she walked out of the room to answer, closing the door firmly on his curious face as she did so. Take that.

"MJ, hi- I'm so sorry I haven't called you lately-" her tone was apologetic as she started and she heard a slight laugh on the other end.

"No! When you called every day I knew you had time. The fact that I haven't heard from you was the most hope I've had all week. You've found something haven't you?" MJ's voice was strained and Alex felt a small twinge of sympathy for the woman.

"Another victim." She answered softly, hearing the quick indrawn breath on the other end.

"Oh shit." She paused for a moment the air thick with tension. "Are you- were there any connections? I mean obviously the killer- but were there-"

"You know I can't answer that MJ." Alex spoke softly, regret lacing her voice. "It would be-"

"I know." MJ heaved a sigh on the other end. "I just- I feel crazy you know? I have nothing to do – I'm on suspension pending investigation, and all I have to do everyday Alex, is think about him. And it-" Her voice chocked slightly, and Alex frowned listening to her.

"Are you still at home MJ?"

"I have nowhere else to go." MJ's voice sounded dull as she responded. "CSU released Mark's- but I- I can't go over there. Even knowing it's just through that wall-"

"Have you been sleeping at all?" Alex spoke softly, and felt the sudden sensation of someone watching her. The gaze was familiar though, and she knew without turning around that Bobby had snuck out of the room to overhear.

"A bit- I try, for the baby, you know..." Alex felt a hand on her shoulder, and turned toward Bobby, who was indicating he needed to talk to her.

"Hang on one second MJ." Covering the phone, she glanced at him expectantly.

"You should- maybe take off and see her. I'll stay and do the files, then when you get back you can take over and I'll take a break." His voice was soft and he leaned towards her as she spoke. The bullpen was dimly lit, and he seemed to be melting into the shadows in front of her, making his face seem much closer. Blinking slightly she opened her mouth to argue. "No Eames, it's not unprofessional, she's a witness not a suspect- besides she- she probably needs someone, and you were the one threatening to kill your laptop-"

"I stick my tongue out at you all the time Goren, and let me tell you- each time does not constitute a death threat." She spoke dryly and a smile twitched the corners of his mouth.

"Says you." He shot back swiftly and she grinned. "Seriously Eames- go – take off for a bit, maybe it'll give you fresh eyes when you get back." She nodded slightly, putting the phone back to her ear. "Fine, but I'll bring you some good coffee back ."

"I'd have to kill you if you didn't." He deadpanned, before waving slightly and turning back towards the room- to bury himself in files and forget I even exist.

"Sorry about that MJ. Would you like to meet for coffee? We can talk if you need to-"

"Oh I couldn't Alex. You're working and-"

"Don't worry- Bobby's taking this shift, so I'm free. Where do you want to meet?"

Alex walked into the small coffee shop in wonder. She had thought between she and Bobby that they'd been to every cafe in Manhattan, but apparently she was wrong. Walking up to the counter and ordering her large coffee she picked it up and turned towards the booth she had spotted MJ in when she entered the shop.

MJ smiled in greeting as she slid into the seat across from her, before leaning forward and unashamedly sniffing her coffee with an expression of longing on her face. Pulling back, she grinned slightly. "Sorry- but I haven't had coffee in forever and it's killing me. First it was to be better able to conceive, and now well-" She gestured down with a small smile and her hands played with the cup in front of her. She looked down at it with a grimace. She wrinkled her nose and laughed slightly. "So now I drink flavored herbal tea- and believe me when I use the word flavored in the loosest sense." She sighed softly, and Alex watched her fidget for a moment unsure of what to talk about. "I'm sorry for pulling you away-"

"Don't worry about it MJ. Bobby and I were just doing a good old fashioned manual search. The make your eyes cross type." She laughed slightly, and took a sip of her coffee. "Oh my god this is fantastic!"

"I know!" MJ smiled softly. "Mark and I found this place and never went anywhere else for coffee. Even if we had to drive an additional twenty minutes- he didn't care." She smiled brightly, but it faltered and slid off her face after a moment. She stared down at the table between them, and one of her hands picked at the edge. "Sorry- I just- I wanted to be distracted you know? I want to stop thinking about it-" She finished on a whisper. Alex nodded in understanding.

"Well, tell me how to distract you." She smiled wryly as she spoke. "A cup of coffee this good is worth a few questions."

MJ's mouth curved upwards and her eyes lost the cold look they had. "Alright, well- tell me about yourself Alex."

"Well- there's not a ton to tell. I'm the second youngest in a family of five. We're Irish- we go big or go home, I guess. I was a horrible tomboy as a child- always chasing after my brothers from the moment I could walk. So my Mom was relieved when a few years later she had Kate- and got the girl she was looking for with me. " She smiled wryly, and MJ nodded, listening intently. "No one was surprised when I became a cop- my Dad was one, two of my brothers are- and the others Army."

"What about your sister?" MJ asked with curiosity.

"Kate's a mom. She always was – if you know what I mean- but she got married young. They tried for a long time before they got Nate." She took another sip of coffee, her mind wandering back to when she had been pregnant.

"Got Nate? They adopted?"

"No- surrogate. Me actually. Drove Bobby nuts when I was off because of the baby. I heard some not so nice stories when I got back." She chuckled and MJ looked at her carefully.

"Wow- that's a huge thing you did for her. Couldn't have been easy." Alex tensed for a moment, not wanting to think about hose first days, and MJ must have read it in her body language, because she changed the subject quickly. "So how long have you and Bobby been partnered?"

"Going on six years now. He went through something like three partners in a year before he got me. He's- he's not easy to work with – not at first anyway. But he's brilliant." She stated simply, her tone warm as she took another sip. MJ smiled and nodded.

"You can tell. But you guys seem to work really well together." She got a far away look in her eyes as she spoke.

"Yeah well- he's a pain in the ass at times. At first I really wanted to do nothing more than smack him. He didn't get my jokes, he would go off on tangents about things we hadn't even talked about- just expecting me to follow the way he thought."

"And you couldn't?" MJ had pushed aside her tea and was leaning against the table now, her face bright and interested.

"Hell no. We may be great partners now- but one thing that will probably always hold true for Goren and I is that in no way do we think alike." She shrugged slightly as she spoke. "But it's not a bad thing- it gives him perspective – and sometimes I learn a thing or two."

"How long did it take?" MJ asked with a knowing look in her eyes.

"A while." She answered softly – her mind drawn to that damn letter for the second time that day. "I almost gave up. But I'm glad I didn't." She shook off the shroud of sadness that had cloaked her for a moment, and began telling the stories of how badly they had misunderstood each other at first. Several moments later MJ was laughing along with her, wiping her eyes occasionally. If there was one thing she was good at- it was telling stories. Her father called it spinning yarns- that her own personal humor often colored the stories and more often then not, she had people crying in laughter over her renditions. It wasn't something she did a lot though- no time on the job, and she smiled watching MJ. "and he actually said 'sharks don't have scales.' I just about died-"

"He thought you were serious? Oh lord!" MJ laughed, her face lighting up as Alex told the story. "Wow, you guys really didn't have a lot in common then, did you?"

"Yeah, well – adjustment I guess. Now he waits for my one liners- I guess I'm getting predictable in my old age." She sighed as she spoke, and MJ glared at her.

"Oh please, Alex- you're what, in your late thirties?"

"Oh I like you already." Alex teased gently. "I turned forty last year. It's a bit sad I think- I mean I have my family and they're great, but-"

"You hit the big birthdays and start wondering?" MJ nodded understandingly as she spoke. "Wondering if making your career your life was the right choice? If you're ever going to have everything- and wondering if it's even worth it anymore?"

"I didn't really have a choice making my career my life. I mean – my husband died-"

"Oh God, Alex, I'm so sorry!" MJ drew back a stricken look on her face, but Alex waved her off.

"It's fine. It's been a while. To be honest- we'd only been married a few years, and looking back I don't even know what would have happened. We were young I guess. At any rate by the time I was even remotely over it, I was at MCS and pulling 14 hour days- and then I had a few really bad dating experiences. The 'oh did I forget to mention my wife' kind of bad." She sighed slightly as she spoke. "At this point I'm not really looking for forever anymore. I like my house- and my life. I like no one telling me what to do, or being bothered by the fact that I spend more than half my day with another man."

"And that's important?" MJ spoke quickly, her eyes shrewd. "Having someone accept Bobby – no questions asked?"

"Well- yeah." Alex answered dryly and MJ smiled.

"It was the same for me – with Mark I mean, before we.. you know. I wouldn't date guys that had an issue with how close we were. Partnership is a hard thing to explain to someone who doesn't work that closely with a co worker. Turns out that I did find someone who was okay with it- it just happened to be him." She laughed slightly, her face softening at the thought of Mark.

"MJ- do you-" Alex bit her lip unsure how to ask the question without offending MJ or possibly revealing too much. "Do you ever regret it? I mean if someone told you-"

"That if we had stayed partners he'd live?" MJ finished her question uncannily. "I've thought about it. A lot- but no- I don't regret it. And given the two choices, I think I'd choose the same. Because if I chose twenty years with Mark as just my partner- God Alex, I'd never have known how it feels to be held by him, or to touch him. I'd never have known what it was like to love someone so much that it was like they were part of me. I'd never have this baby- and I can't regret that." Her eyes filled up, and Alex instantly felt horrible for even bringing it up.

"I'm sorry-"

"No! Don't be Alex. If you're asking for a reason- which I'm not saying you are, but if – just look at it this way. What if I had stayed partners with him, and he met someone? I don't think I ever would have- but Mark was a great guy. He could have met someone and gotten married, had kids. The way I felt- I wouldn't have been able to- I wouldn't have been strong enough to stay and watch. So I would have lost him anyway." She spoke simply, and her eyes met Alex's, pinning her down with her intent gaze. She flushed and looked away from her eyes, playing with her empty cup as she did so.

"You and Bobby, Alex- how long?" Alex swallowed nervously, she hadn't spoken about it to anyone- not her family, not her friends, not even her therapist.

"I don't know." She finally answered after a long silence. "I guess a better question would be when didn't I? The more I learned about him- the more time I spent with him- he's – he's-" She paused, uncertain how to describe it. "It doesn't matter though- even if he felt the same, which I doubt- our partnership is too important to us."

"How do you know what he'd want Alex?" She spoke softly, leaning forward and waiting.

"He's- Bobby is just- you don't know him MJ. He needs me as his partner more than he needs me in any other way. I keep him even- balanced. Without that – he wouldn't be able to function well. When I was gone-" She looked down suddenly, staring at the cheap plastic cover on her empty cup and frowning. "He needs me to protect him, even from himself sometimes." MJ nodded understandingly.

"You're worried- that if you gave in, and it didn't work-"

"It could ruin everything. And I need Bobby just as much- maybe more- than he needs me. I can't just give in- I have to fight- for both of us." Her phone buzzed at her side, and she glanced over at MJ in apology. Checking the display- She saw her partners name and grimaced. "Eames."

"I think I found something- and you won't believe who it is- fits the profile, and god damn, how did I not see this sooner?" His voice was excited, and agitated all at once. She frowned on her end.

"Bobby- who is it?"

"I'll talk to you when you get here, I'm calling Carver in the meantime, we need a warrant for the IA files, and his house- I'll see you soon." He hung up quickly and she glared at her phone.

"Idiot." She muttered , and looked up at MJ, apology in her eyes.

"You have to go- go. I'll be alright. Thanks for seeing me, Alex." Alex stood, and glanced down with a smile.

"It wasn't a problem, MJ. Call me – okay?" Turning to go, she walked a step and turned back. "Oh and thanks- for listening about the- and if you-"

"I won't breath a word, Alex. I swear. Now go!" She laughed and waved her off, and Alex walked up to the counter to get Bobby's coffee – and one more for herself, it was damn good coffee- before taking the tray and exiting the cafe with a wave.