Well...it wasn't raining.
It was, however, very hot. And sandy.
In fact, sand kept blowing into his eyes, and he would have flinched or tried to protect himself, but that would destroy his bad-guy, nothing-affects-me image.
He frowned. If he was a gay little weak insignificant twerp, where would he hide…?
Sasuke had friends in this village, that much he knew.
Well, friends was pushing it. Acquaintances? Associates? Links? Whatever.
"Ummm…Itachi…?"
This village was just one big sand castle…
"…Itachi…?"
One big sandcastle he was going to crush.
"Itachi-"
"Quiet, fool! And from now on, you will address me as Itachi-sama!"
"Ummm….why…?" Itachi sent him a harsh look. "Itachi-sama."
"Because I can. Now move."
With that command, they descended onto the village which would soon be crushed.
Itachi didn't mention that he wanted Kisame to call him Itachi-sama because he felt insecure. No. No. No. No. Itachi does not DO insecure.
However, apparently, pregnant-Itachi does. Thus, he was Itachi-sama. It made him feel good about himself…
Itachi began taking out his anger that he felt good about himself when Kisame called him Itachi-sama by destroying the village. With a sharingan here, sharingan there…soon, the village had been practically leveled, and just when Itachi was about to deliver the finishing blow, someone stopped him…
Itachi frowned at the red-headed boy in front of him.
"Stop destroying my village, or I'll kill you."
"No." Itachi was never one to yield under intimidation.
"What do you want?"
"I'm looking for two people."
The red head frowned. "You look familiar…"
If he looked familiar then that meant he probably knew Sasuke which meant he might know where Sasuke is.
"Hey! He thinks you look familiar which might mean he knows Sas-mphf-" Itachi body slammed Kisame into a wall.
"Quiet, fool! I know!"
"…you look like Sasuke…"
"I would do. He's my brother."
The red-head looked surprised and Itachi was sure if he had eyebrows they would have raised.
"AHHH!" What kinda twisted freak didn't have eyebrows!
"I'm Gaara." Said the red-head.
"Itachi." Replied Itachi, who had recovered and was avoiding Gaara's eyes and his lack of eyebrows, and also resisting the urge to introduce himself as Itachi-sama.
"You're Sasuke's brother?"
Itachi nodded.
"That sucks."
He nodded again. "I know."
"Did you know that Sasuke…and Naruto…"
"Are screwing? Yes. That's partly why I'm here."
Gaara frowned, confused.
Itachi waved his hand at Kisame, who was trying to play dead in the hope the pain and anguish he suffered would finally stop...
Itachi sharinganed a boulder onto Kisame and commanded, "Explain to Gaara, pathetic freak."
After explanations of gayness, babies (or lack of), sex and Orochimaru, hindered by the fact Kisame's jaw was broken and Itachi kept breaking his fingers whenever he paused, Gaara was finally clued in.
Gaara looked thoughtful, then asked, "…so…would it be in your best interests to break up Naruto and Sasuke?"
"…maybe…I'm sure the blonde demon will object to me giving his bum-buddy to Orochimaru."
"…I'll help you find them if I get Naruto."
Did Itachi really need help?
He felt a twinge from his stomach and glanced over at the helpless mess that was Kisame.
"…okay then. But…the village…" He trailed off and glanced around at the carnage.
Gaara shrugged.
"…okay, let's go."
-------------------------------------------
That wasn't meant to happen... -wonders how Gaara got dragged into the journey- oh well.
And I'm sooo sorry, it took ages for me to update -dies-. But I got so many AWESOME reviews! -is unworthy-
Thanks for reading! Please R&R! It motivates me!