Guilt, Sin & Apples Pt. 8
Waitin' wasn't his strong suit. Well, of course he could wait if his life depended on it, and sometimes it did. If a man couldn't wait for trouble to come to him on his own ground, he'd be much more likely to die seekin' it out. So, yeah – he could wait like that.
But not like this. Waitin' for her to come and ask for her notebook was startin' to wear on him. It weighed on him worse than bein' on a heavy planet, where the gravity-levelers hadn't quite worked out. Sometimes it was like that on a dense planet – apparently, it was a lot easier to artificially increase gravity than to decrease it. Anyway, he never liked to go to those worlds, where he felt slow and weak, like he did now.
She never tried to catch his eye these days. He knew because he watched her, and if Mal happened to catch him watchin' her, he'd just remind Mal that she had injured him twice now, and he'd keep an eye on her if he damn well pleased.
Of course, that weren't the real reason at all. He wasn't even sure if he knew the real reason. He just knew better than to ask himself.
For days before the crew docked on Kaylee's home planet of Caledonia, Kaylee was even cheerier than usual. She looked forward to seeing her parents and her little sister, and had begun regaling the crew at every opportunity with stories of her youth, which was a particularly funny idea to most of the crew when they considered how young she was. However, since none of them had ever really seen her so excited about anything, most of them indulged her and asked questions about stories they had by now heard a dozen times, while smiling good-naturedly over her head. Her enthusiasm was infectious.
Jayne was still suffering the after-effects of his last adventure on Persephone, and every time he moved, he felt the stitches pulling in his belly. At night, he often lay awake, belly throbbing, his hand absently playing over the weave that still stuck to him under his shirt. He wondered if he really might have died if River hadn't come along and found him bleeding and drunk in the infirmary.
In the hours approaching landfall, everyone made their plans. Kaylee would visit with her folks while Mal, Zoe and Wash attended a meeting with a man who needed to move fresh vegetables off planet. Inara had two clients lined up, since it looked like Serenity might be moored for a few days. Simon and Book would remain aboard with River and Jayne, since River needed looking after and Jayne would still be useless in a fight for some time to come. It all seemed simple.
After hitting dirt, Kaylee didn't let any moss grow on her bootheels. She barely waited for the doors to open, and she was off with a cheery wave to the rest of the crew, who all felt somewhat like they were sending their little girl off to school for the first time. Not a man among them didn't remember their first visit back home after taking to the black, and they all knew the pride Kaylee felt in being able to return home with credits in pocket and tales to tell.
Inara made her exit quietly, as was her habit, telling only Mal when she would return to Serenity. Shortly thereafter, Mal, Zoe and Wash made their way into the small town to do their business.
Jayne was more than slightly annoyed that he had to stay behind, since Mal had made it clear to him that every day he wasn't able to work would cost him. Mal could be generous to a crew member who got themselves injured on the job, but apparently, gettin' knifed in a bar during a drunken brawl didn't count. He had tallied up Jayne's cost of care, everything from the bandages and antibiotics, to the food he ate while he recuperated. When Jayne had protested about the cost of food being added to his bill, Mal had only pointed out that while he wasn't workin' to put food on the table, it wasn't free. Jayne understood enough to know that supplies was limited, and he was consumin' em. Deep down, he didn't even really resent Mal's decision that much. He did, however, resent the fact that he wasn't allowed to go along on the job today, and therefore would not be paid any of the cut.
Still, he had to admit, he wasn't quite up to snuff. He was hurtin' and he was tired, not bein' able to sleep much at night. It probably was best for him to skip this job. And as much as he wanted to get off the boat for a few hours, he knew better than to get off and then get into any trouble. Mal might just take it into his head to hire another merc, one who was smarter than him and wouldn't be thinkin' about the doc's little sister all the damn time.
Jayne wondered what she was doing since they'd landed. Kaylee was her main amusement, aside from drawin', and he wondered if she was as bored as he was. Hell, that brother of hers ought to take advantage of the fact that they were on a mostly agricultural planet, where any Alliance presence would be minimal, and take her off into the air and sun for a while. Maybe he should suggest that to the preacher, who might pass it on as his own idea, since Jayne doubted the doc was ready to take any advice from him.
As for himself, he figured it couldn't hurt nothin' if he was to sit outside of Serenity and soak up some sun.
Once he was outside, the first thing he felt was the first thing he always felt – the solidity of the dirt beneath him. Unlike some of the other members of the crew, Jayne had no true affinity for the black. He went there to make a living, and found it necessary. But he didn't love it. To him, Earth-norm gravity always felt like home, and fresh air felt like a blessing in his lungs.
He took a deep breath, shook out the plastic chair that belonged to Kaylee, and sprawled out in it, his long legs spread out before him. Turning his face up to the sun, he closed his eyes and sighed. This planet smelled good to him, clean and cool. With any luck, maybe they'd see some rain before they went. Ever since River had mentioned it in the kitchen that day, he'd been cravin' it somethin' fierce. As he'd thought of her words later, he'd tried to place when was the last time he'd been in the rain, and almost couldn't remember it. He thought of the times when he was a kid and they couldn't work in the fields because of rain. Rain had meant freedom back then, and now – now, he craved it.
A small sound alerted him that he wasn't alone, and he slitted one eye half open to see River floating down the gangplank, her chocolate colored dress blowing erratically behind her. His gut tensed like it did when he knew a fight was on , but this was different. It felt different. It felt like…fear, and something else he couldn't name, all wrapped up together.
When she reached his side, she only looked down on him, her face serene, as casual as if she hadn't avoided him for weeks since the day in the mess when she'd left her notebook.
He looked back for a moment, then deliberately closed his eye and turned his face back to the sun, containing his tension behind a cool facade. Praying she couldn't, or wouldn't, see beyond that.
"A lion in the sun," he heard her say.
He knew what she meant, but couldn't stop himself from teasing her. Hell, if he'd admit it to himself, he didn't even want to stop himself. He never did where she was concerned. "Where?" he said, lazily, eyes still closed.
When he felt a tickle on his nose, his eyes slitted open again to find her leaning over him, her long hair brushing his nose. He was reminded of the other time she had done this while he worked out. Something told him that she liked to look down on him.
His first instinct was to sit up, but he curbed it and remained where he was. "What'dya want?" he asked, trying to calm his heartbeat and breathe normally. The scent of her washed over him, and broken pictures of her as he had dreamed of her washed through his mind, inundating him with images of her white skin and dark hair and her panting breath in his ear. He might have even forgotten to sound surly.
"I'm afraid for Kaylee," she said softly, her nose only a few inches above his own. "Family is hard to lose." She smiled sadly, then stood straight and stared into the distance. "I've lost both my parents, you know."
Jayne felt a fist clench in his stomach. He sat up. "Is there somethin' wrong with Kaylee?" he asked, knowing by now not to doubt anything River said, only his ability to understand it.
She looked back into his eyes and considered him for a long moment. "No," she said finally. "Kaylee's fine." Her head tilted to the side. "But something… bad is happening." Her eyes didn't waver from his, yet he saw how they focused inward. "Nothing we can do. Too far." Tears filled her eyes. "Aren't I broken enough?" she asked.
He stood, unsure of what to do. Should he alert the preacher? Surely he'd have some idea.
Jayne took her smaller hand in his and led her back aboard Serenity, leaving Kaylee's chair sitting out in the sun by itself.
As luck would have it, he ran across the doc before he could find the preacher, and the fact that River's hand was engulfed in his own made him uncomfortable enough to try to pull away. She, of course, wouldn't have it. She had none of the playfulness about her that he might of expected from a trick like that, though - when he looked down at her, she looked… scared.
His hand tightened around hers.
He spoke before Simon could say anything about their entwined hands. "Hey, Doc," he said. "River says there's somethin' wrong with Kaylee, or… Kaylee's okay, but…" He looked down at River, hoping she would speak, but she only looked at him entreatingly. Wanting him to say it. He took a breath. "Somethin' to do with her… family?" His statement ended on a question, mostly because he knew he had no idea what he was saying.
Simon looked at River, concerned. "Are you sure that you're not just – imagining…?"
Jayne shook his head impatiently. "Damn it, Doc," he said, not bothering to try and hide his irritation. "When're you gonna learn?" he asked. "Don't it seem pretty obvious that yer sister's got – I dunno – what they used to call 'The Sight'?"
Simon only glanced at him impatiently before refocusing intently on River. "Are you sure?" he asked.
River only nodded miserably.
Simon tensed. "Will there be anything I can… do?" He looked vaguely hopeful.
She only shrugged, her eyes as helpless as his.
Jayne sighed, frustrated. What was the damn use in knowin' somethin' bad was about to happen if you couldn't do nothin' about it?
River's big brown eyes fixed on his. "It's so we can be ready," she said sadly.
"Ready to what, River?" Simon asked.
She only stared down at the steel floor under her feet, saying nothing more.
The news, when it came, wasn't much of a surprise.
Zoe called in to Serenity, only telling the Shepherd that she and Mal and Wash had been delayed. When they showed up a few hours later, they were solemn-eyed and quiet. Without being summoned, everyone gathered at the large table in Serenity's mess to hear what had happened.
Mal looked around at the assembled group, and his eyes narrowed. "Y'all wanna tell me how y'all seem to know somethin's goin' on?" he asked.
Book was the first to speak. He nodded toward River. "She knows it's about Kaylee, and it isn't good. That's all we know." He paused. "Is… Kaylee alright?"
Mal only shrugged. "Well," he said, "what's happened ain't nothin' anyone here would want to happen in their own family, but it ain't so bad that we got to avoid sayin' what it is, if you know what I mean."
Jayne couldn't help himself. "But – she's alright?"
The captain nodded. "She's alright. But she's lost some family, and that's always hard. We're gonna be here for a couple more days, and we're gonna all attend her brother's funeral, day after tomorrow. Hopefully, Kaylee's still plannin' on shippin' out with us afterwards, cause we ain't got a chance in hell of getting' a mechanic as good as her if she don't."
Simon spoke next. "Uh.. brother?" he asked. "I don't remember Kaylee ever mentioning that she had a brother."
"Older. Born angry." This was River.
"Seems unlikely, considerin' Kaylee's sweet ways," the preacher put in, only to be cut off by Zoe's head shaking.
"Who knows? Maybe Kaylee got all the happy genes in the family. The point is, he was Kaylee's brother, and she loved him, and he's dead now."
Book asked the next obvious question. "Do we.. know what happened?" he asked tentatively.
It was Mal who answered, while Zoe and Wash just looked solemn. "The brother had a habit he couldn't handle, had debts he couldn't deal with. He kidnapped Kaylee's little sister and tried to sell her back to their parents for enough money to get him off-planet. He threatened to sell the girl to some other buyer if the parents didn't pay. Kaylee's father – shot him."
"Oh." Shepherd Book's reply pretty much encompassed the reaction of all of them.
"Kind of.. I don't know…boggles the mind, doesn't it?" Wash asked, including the room in general in his question. "Just doesn't seem possible that Kaylee – sweet, lovable Kaylee – could come from a family like that, does it?"
"Is her father in any legal trouble?" Simon asked, and the question startled Jayne, because such a thing hadn't even crossed his mind.
Zoe shook her head. "Law seems to be on his side," she said. "But it's still gonna be mighty difficult for Kaylee to come to terms with."
Another moment of silence passed, then Simon said, "I want to go to where she is. Is that possible? Can someone here take me there?"
Mal and Zoe looked at each other, then Zoe transferred her gaze to Wash. "Can you take Simon?" she asked softly, her voice taking on that tone that it took on only when she spoke to him. Wash only nodded, then looked at Simon.
"Are you ready to go now?" he asked.
"Just let me grab my bag," Simon replied, "in case there's something I can do for someone."
Wash nodded. "I'll get the Mule up and runnin', then," he said, standing. He squeezed his wife's shoulder, as he walked past her. "I'll be back as soon as I can be," he told her.
She only nodded.
As he passed Book, Simon hesitated, but before he could say anything, Book spoke reassuringly. "Don't worry about a thing," he said with a small smile. "I'll keep my eye on her while you're gone. You go now."
Simon nodded, then looked back at River, standing beside Jayne. "I'll be back as soon as I can," he told her. She only nodded, and he gave her a long look before turning and following Wash out of the mess.
Mal sighed. "Well," he said, "I'll be in my berth, finishing up the last details of our business dealings. Zoe, I'll need you." She nodded, and the two of them exited as well, leaving only Book, Jayne and River in the kitchen.
When River turned to the hatch, Book smiled at her. "And where will you be, in case I'd like to have a word with you later, or call you to dinner?"
She looked at him solemnly. "I'm going to go get my notebook," she said, quite lucidly. "I will return for dinner."
Book smiled again, thinking that drawing would be a good distraction for the girl, whose company (he didn't mind admitting to himself and God) had made him more than a little nervous since the time she had "reassured" him that time that he wouldn't die gasping.
"Well, that's just fine," he said. "I'll see about finding us something good to eat tonight, then, shall I?"
River, unconcerned with such things as politeness, had already turned away and headed for Jayne's bunk.
Jayne, meanwhile, while admittedly not the brightest bulb in the box, had understood what River was saying quite clearly, as if she had seared it into his skin as she said it. He just didn't know what to do. Let her go to his bunk and get the book? He rejected this idea as quickly as it occurred. She couldn't be allowed into his bunk alone – there was too many weapons there, too many things he didn't want her to dig through or get into. There was a stack of pornography sittin' on the shelf in plain sight, and she'd see it if she got to goin' through his stuff.
He took as step backward. "Yeah, uh.. I got some things ta.. you know.. take care of, myself," he said. "I'll, uh.. see ya at supper, I reckon."
The shepherd, who was already headed for the cupboards, looked up enquiringly. "Sure you don't want help me out and chop some things for me?"
Jayne took another step backward. "Sure wish I could," he said. "But, uh.. I got…you know, things…"
And without another word, he turned and ducked through the hatch, headed for his bunk at top speed.
Book shook his head. He'd noticed more than once that Jayne was quite fond of Kaylee, though he knew the big mercenary would never admit as much. He must be more worried for her than he wanted anyone to know.
Jayne, knowing that the captain and Zoe was unlikely to be in the passages, ran to his bunk as if Reavers was chasin' him through the corridors. Still, when he got there, the hatch was already open, and he wasted no time descending the ladder. He found River sitting on the floor, crosslegged… drawing in her sketchbook.
Her hair fell over her shoulder, almost long enough to drag on the page. She didn't look up as he descended the ladder, just kept drawing.
Now that he was here, Jayne didn't know what to do. He stood there for a moment, then took a step toward her. "You can't be in here," he said, not surly, just factual.
She looked up at him, tilted her head to the side. Then she looked back at the page she was drawing on. "Can't be anywhere," she answered, her voice soft.
He took another step toward her, not understanding her words, but not expecting to. "Yeah. But – you really can't be here," he repeated. He had to get her out of there before the captain or Zoe found out.
"Don't worry," she said. "No one will know. You won't get in trouble." She looked up, her gaze met his squarely. "I promise."
Jayne was drawn a step closer by her voice, and a desire to see what she was drawing. "River," he said, his voice nearly as soft as hers. "You gotta take your sketch book and git on out of here, now."
She didn't look up. "Why did you keep it?' she asked.
He shrugged, stepping even closer. "You left it in the kitchen," he said. "Just thought I'd give it back to ya when I saw ya, and just… never did."
"No," she said, still drawing. "You wanted me to come." Her eyes met his again, and he was suddenly surprised to find himself standing nearly over her. "You wanted me," she said.
Staring down at her, he knew the uselessness of lying, and it nearly made him angry. A man had a right to his own thoughts, and his defenses, didn't he? And yet, since she had pressed the clone child's thoughts into his head, he understood something of what it was to be her, and he didn't know if he would ever be able to be truly angry with her again. He surprised himself by squatting before her, and putting his hand over her drawing hand.
When her eyes met his again, he gazed into them, closer than he ever had before. "You cannot be here," he said again, his voice rumbling deep in his chest. "It's dangerous."
Her eyes began to fill with tears and Jayne felt that clench in his guts again. He glanced down at the page she had been drawing on, only to see a picture of an unfamiliar girl there. Trying to distract her, he said, "Who's this?"
She glanced down at the drawing. "It's … Kaylee's sister," she said, as one tear traced down her cheek. "She's only fourteen – the same age I was when – when I was River Tam."
He frowned. "You're still River Tam," he said, wondering what she meant.
She bit her lip, then swiped her hand under her nose, leaving a dark smudge on her upper lip from the pencil she had been using. "No," she said, her eyes dipping into his. "I – I am the River that flows forth from the girl who was River Tam," she said, then sobbed in earnest, her hand over her mouth. "I am not that child – she's dead, just as this girl is dead now, too – don't you see?"
No, he didn't see, and he was frustrated as hell. He didn't know what to do with a crying crazy girl… hell, he couldn't even call nobody because she couldn't be found in his bunk! Damn it!
Suddenly, she wilted forward and leaned her cheek on his heavy thigh, and snuffled again. Without thinking, he stroked his hand down her back, feeling every rib under his hand. He frowned. The damn girl needed to eat, he thought. He looked down at her and felt defeated. "Why you always gotta come cry on me, crazy girl?" he asked her wryly, then stroked his hand over her hair. "Don't you know I ain't got no experience with cryin' girls? I don't even know what to do, or say. You know that, right?"
She sat up, and his palm found her wet cheek, his thumb brushed over her cheekbone, then gently rubbed away the dark smear over her upper lip.
Her eyes were miserable. "I hurt," she nearly whispered.
He frowned. "I ain't no doctor," he said. "I can't help you." Yet his hand still caressed her face.
She rose to her knees as he still squatted before her, his own knees splayed, and leaned her cheek against his chest. Her eyes closed. Jayne froze, not knowing what to do. "Put your arms around me," she instructed, and without thought, he obeyed her, even though he knew they were playing with fire. "Tighter," she said dreamily, and he closed his arms around her, one arm clamped around her waist, the other wrapped around her shoulders. Her own arms wrapped firmly around his back.
She felt so… small against him. Somehow he hadn't remembered that from the time he'd held her inside his coat in the cold, or the time he'd carried her to the medlab. How could she be so small?
She sighed, then said softly, "There's silence inside you," she said clearly, "a place for tears. Here, there is no Wash and Zoe, no Mal and Inara, no Simon and Kaylee. Here, there is only Jayne, who once was a boy who would have liked the girl who once was River Tam…"
His grip tightened on her even more for an instant. "I don't understand what you're sayin'" he said, "but I guess I don't really need to." He leaned back and wrapped his hands around her upper arms, then stood, and pulled her with him. "I… I can't be the one you come to when you're cryin'," he said, feelin' cruel as he said it. "You gotta go to… your brother, or – Inara. Even Mal," he told her. "But not to me, do you understand?"
Her eyes searched into his. "My pain becomes your pain," she said softly.
He shook his head. "That ain't it," he said. "It just ain't right, that's all."
She stood on her toes, pulled his head down to whisper in his ear, and he didn't resist, his hands still wrapped around her arms.
Her breath was moist in his ear, and he shivered as she whispered. "Shared pain is less," she said, her voice as wise and innocent as the stones of Earth That Was. "And shared pleasure is more."
And with that, she turned her head and despite all his best intentions, he met her halfway, his mouth on hers before he had a chance to consider the consequences. He broke before her like a dam waiting for one more drop of rain. All he knew was that he was on fire for her, and it felt like he always had been, as if every woman he'd ever had, had been practice for this. For her. Tasting her felt like coming home.
She arched into him, and his arms clamped around her, lifting her off the floor. Her legs wrapped around him, unhesitating, as if the two of them had rehearsed for this moment a thousand times. His mouth never left hers as he shifted one arm to support her bottom, then buried the other hand in her hair, turned her head so that he could taste her more deeply. When she groaned, he nearly came out of his skin, that feline purr echoing into him as if it had maybe come from him in the first place.
In his mind's eye. He suddenly saw her at the pond back on the old place, her hand on his chest, her eyes full of sorrow. He pulled his mouth from hers and stared down into her eyes.
"You've been wandering around in my head," he said huskily. "I told you not to do that, didn't I?"
"Minds wander in sleep," she said. "My mind wanders, too." She looked up at him, all innocence and seduction. Then, she stretched up, put her mouth on his again, and he groaned, all pretense of resistance given up as her legs tightened around him.
Without really knowing how it happened, he found himself kneeling on his bunk, River still wrapped around him like a vine to a tree. His mouth broke contact with hers as he lowered her to the bunk, then he buried his mouth in her throat, tasting her there as he had dreamed so many times. Her skin was smooth as silk under his tongue, and tasted of apples, as he'd known it would.
She gave a kittenish mew and twisted against him, running her hands up under his shirt and grinding her hips against him in unabashed invitation.
He groaned. He wanted to go slow, but –
She pulled his shirt over his head impatiently, and before he could lean back down to capture her mouth again, she leaned forward and bit him, her teeth sinking into the flesh just beneath his collarbone.
He grunted and pulled back, but the small pain only made him harder, and he began unbuttoning the back of her dress urgently, his hands busy behind her as his blue eyes stared down into her brown ones. She traced the bite mark she had left on his chest with her fingers, then leaned up and ran her tongue along the cord in his neck, and he groaned, finally pushing the material of her dress over her shoulder and baring one small breast.
Her fingers played lightly over the weave on his stomach, and she looked softly up into his eyes. ::you could have died::
He heard it plain as speakin' in his head, but was far too distracted by her near nakedness to care.
It occurred to him then that she was too small, too fragile, to be under him, so he wrapped his hands around her ribs and reversed their positions, pulling her over him like a blanket, then raised her up so that her breast was within reach. She arched against him as he tasted her there, and mewed again as she writhed against him, her hands in his hair.
He pushed the dress down around her waist, finding that she wore nothing under it but a pair of plain, white panties, which he found unbearably erotic. His hands slid down the cool skin of her back, to cup her buttocks as she slid down and pressed herself firmly against him. He groaned and dug his fingers into the backs of her thighs.
She put her mouth to his, pushed her tongue inside and bit his bottom lip as he cupped her hip in one hand. Then she sat back and reached for the fastening to his pants.
He slid one hand into her panties, and she froze.
For a moment, he thought he'd done something wrong, until she rocked against his hand, her eyes closed, her head back. He nearly came just from the look on her face as he slid one, then two fingers into her wetness.
His pants were forgotten as her hands clenched on her thighs, and she rode his hand unselfconsciously, absorbing pleasure as a sponge absorbs water. He touched her with his thumb and she gasped, her hands clenching and unclenching. As he watched her, he realized in some haphazard fashion that she was right. Pleasure shared was more. Her pleasure was his pleasure – just as her pain became his, also.
She leaned forward, pressing harder on his hand, and Jayne gave her want she wanted, twisting his hand against her. She gasped, and her eyes fluttered open to fasten on his. If he'd thought watching her before was erotic, this unashamed meeting of eyes while she took the pleasure of his hand her nearly broke him. She bucked against him, breathing hard. Finally she gasped and twisted her hips one last time, her eyelids fluttering, then collapsed against him, panting heavily.
Only a moment later, her lips found his again as he pulled at her panties, then finally ripped them to get them off her. Not a word was spoken as she reached again for his pants, and when he finally sprang free of them in the coolness of the room, he felt as if lightning was sizzling along his nerve endings.
She took him in her hand, staring down at him. Then she slid down and tasted him, as if she'd done it a thousand times. He gasped, pulling her back up. "Not this time, princess," he panted, his hands on her hips. "You just hold onto that thought, though," he said huskily, with a hint of humor.
Instead, he rubbed her wetness against him, and stared up into her eyes as he began to push into her. As he entered her, her eyes slowly closed and she wriggled slightly against him, accommodating his size. He panted as she slowly began to ride him, and relaxed when he realized that she felt no pain.
She'd done this before, then. He filed that thought away somewhere in the back of his mind.
He tried to hold off as long as he could, wanting her to come again before he did, and he began to encourage her. "That's right baby," he panted up to her, his hands on her hips. "Oh, yeah, girl, you do it just like that – oh, wuh de ma -"
Then he pulled her down, his hand in her hair, and took her mouth with his, thrusting up against her with everything that was in him. Suddenly, she stiffened, clenched around him and cried out into his mouth. With one more powerful thrust he spilled himself into her as the room seemed to go black around them…
For a long moment, Jayne just lay there, River clutched to his chest, her heart pounding against his. Her hair spread out over the two of them, and he absently brushed his hand over it, smoothing it down her back.
"…Are you… okay?" he finally asked as his heart and his breath slowed, looking down at the top of her head.
She sat up, and he slid out of her, still half-hard.
She stared into his eyes. "Are you?" she asked.
He laced his arms behind his head. "Well, you nearly gave me a damn heart attack, but yeah… I'm alright." He considered the bare metal ceiling of his room, then said, "Of course, now Mal will kill me, and I'll go straight to hell for this, but – for now – I'm okay."
Her face was solemn. "Mal will not be allowed to hurt you," she said. Then she turned and picked her dress up from the floor. As she leaned forward, her vertabrae pressed against her skin, and Jayne gently ran his fingers down her back.
"You should eat more," he said, and she tossed a partial smile at him over her shoulder as she pulled the dress over her head, then turned and presented her back to him, waiting for him to button the dress for her.
He sat up and gathered her hair, pushing it over her shoulder. Then he surprised himself by kissing the back of her long neck. "You're beautiful," he growled softly in her ear, wrapping one arm around her and pressing his chest to the length of her bare back. Then he buttoned up her dress, all business as she stared back over her shoulder at him, her eyes unreadable.
"Shepherd Book will serve dinner soon," she said.
"I know," he said, hitching up the britches he was still wearing. He sighed. Hell, he was still wearin' his boots.
Her eyes searched forward, as if she could see the whole of the ship from his room, then she said, "Mal and Zoe will be there, and the shepherd. Soon, Simon and Kaylee and Wash will come home," she said, "and… maybe one more."
This interested him. "Who?" he asked.
She turned and smiled her sad smile at him. "Loren," she said. "Kaylee's sister."
Jayne sat up straighter, pulling his shirt back over his head. "Nah," he said, "Cap'n would never allow it. This ain't no nursery, and Kaylee ain't bringin' no more little girls on board – you saw how it worked out last time."
River shrugged, still staring into space.
Jayne looked at her for a moment, then – "You know somethin' you ain't sayin', little witch?"
She looked back at him as she stood up. "There are many ways to say," she said, that mysterious smile on her lips.
She was up the ladder and gone before he could answer.