'Rafa?'

'What?'

'I miss you too.'

He didn't know what to do with that. It angered him the effect she still had on him. Sadden him to hear her vulnerability if only for a split second. Something he has only seen a handful of times. Confusion as I what she thought those words would do to him. Not able to respond to her he did the next best thing and ran.

Stepping out of the bar he was hit by the bright sky. Being in that bar, so close to her was suffocating. The same bar they spent so much time together. From their first drink together to the day she left him. He needed to get out, needed to get some air. Somewhere that didn't have her scent. Her sweet rose perfume did things to him. No matter how much he wanted to pull her into his arms, he couldn't.

But why?

Why couldn't he have just turned to her? Pull her into his arms. Hold her. Barba scoffed, he knew why. It was always for the same reason. Someone was always getting between them. Only this time he was sure to lose her for good.

"To hell with it." Turning back around towards the bar, he bumped into Olivia. Now or never.

"Rafa?" She stepped back not sure what to say or do. "I-yo-"

"13 years."

She frowned. "What?"

"You said you've known Stabler for 23 years." Barba knew he was treading on shaky ground, but she was already not speaking to him. What more could she do to him. "Stabler left without a word for ten years. Not a call or a letter. He kept in contact with Fin, but now you?"

"Don't."

"You are angry at me for doing what I thought was right at the moment." Barba growled. "My priority wasn't to help Wheatley getaway. It wasn't to get back at Stabler, I have neither good nor bad feelings towards him. I did so you wouldn't have to live through the worst moments of your life again. So that whatever weasel of a lawyer he contours up didn't drag you in front of everyone. I did it to protect you."

"I didn't ask you to."

"You don't have to!" He scoffed turning away from her. "You don't get it. You never have to ask me for anything. I am not going to walk out of your life just for the hell of it or because it's too much. I have shown you over and over I will never leave you."

"Stab-"

"Left!" He yelled. "He fucken left! After 13 years of partnership, he left you with nothing but a broken heart and an empty desk. You said he had your back? Where was he when Lewis attacked you? When Noah was taken? Your squad and I were there. I stood by your side through it all. When Noah's biological father showed up, I fought to make sure Noah was safe. I put my career on the line by covering for your testimony on Lewis. When Stabler came back all that went to hell. No of that was worth anything to you." Barba had lost control at that moment. He no longer cared to filter his words. "When I defended Wheatley I saw a different side of you I had never seen. The one that only comes when you're around Stabler. You asked me not to defend him because of Stabler, not me. You put your personal feelings before your sense of justice."

"What are you talking about?"

"Had that been any other case you wouldn't have asked me." Barba snapped. "You wouldn't have become angry to the point where I can't even talk to Noah! That day you left without even giving me the chance to properly explain myself. To show you my point of view. You did exactly what Stabler did to you. You left without a word."

"So did you." She whispered.

Barba laughed staggering back. "Unlike you, I tried contacting you. I called and texted. It wasn't until Fin told me to leave you alone. Give you some space. And I did, for nearly a year holding on to some false hope that you would respond to my last text." Stepping towards her, he slowly raised his hand to her cheek. Waited until she looked up into his eyes. "I don't know what sort of hold Stabler has on you. But until you can see what we all see, I can't stand around hoping anymore. I can't keep throwing myself into the pit of fire knowing I will keep getting burned." Leaning forward he kissed her on the forehead. "Goodbye, Liv."

Watching him walk away brought so many memories. The last time he said goodbye, she wanted to chase after him. Beg him to stay by her side as he had done for 6 years. As she took a step after him, she was halted by her phone.

"Benson."

'Hey, it's me.'

His voice drew her foot back. "El." Looking at Barba she watched him toss his jacket into the back seat, before slamming the door shut. He walked around getting into the driver's side. "Hey."

'Listen, I am having a cookout with the kids and mom. I was hoping you and Noah could join us.'

She turned away from the retreating car. Not understanding why it hurt more now than it did a year ago. "Uh, yeah. When is-" She whirled around at hearing a loud crash.

'What was that?'

"A car crash I think." As she jogged towards the scene, Olivia took cover between two parked cars after hearing multiple guns go off.

'Liv?!'

"I'm fine." Poking her head over the truck of the car, she growled at not being able to see anything. "Call fin. I am at the street corner of Fornil's bar." Hanging up on the man, she dialed 9-1-1. "This is Captain Benson with the SVU, I need additional units. Shots fired at the corner of Hanson and D st."

Shoving her phone back into her pocket, she crept around the side of the car and got closer. Getting to the last car, she peeped out the hood of the car. Her eyes scanned the area to find no guns man. Looking at the crash she felt the air knocked out of her. Between the SUV and parked car was Rafael's black Lexus.

"No." Running out into the gathering crowd, she reached the crumpled car. To her desperation, she wasn't unable to get to him. The cars were blocking every possible access. "Rafa?!" Getting no response, Olivia leaned against the hood of the car. Her gaze dropped to the small holes in the car. "Bullet holes?" Slowly her eyes trailed up to the bloody man. His windshield was completely riddled with holes. It was impossible to see if he was shot. "Rafa!"

"Liv?!" Fin broke through the crowd, his steps faltering at the scene in front of him. His captain was banging on the hood of the car, yelling for whoever was in the wrecked car. "Liv, what-" Seeing the fire department pull up, he wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her back. "Hey!"

"It's Rafael!" She cried.

He was sure his eyes were the size of saucers. "Barba?"

Olivia growled at seeing the crowd getting larger by the second. She turned to find a few officers loitering around. "What are you doing?! Get these people back! This is an active crime scene!"

Startled from the conversation, they quickly did as ordered. The crowd was pushed back to the sidewalk. One began setting up the crime scene tape.

"Crime scene?" Amanda rolled up to them with the rest of the squad. "It's just an accident Liv."

Fin winced at the murderous look Olivia gave her detective. "It's Barba."

"Wait, Barba?" Carisi gasped. "Is he alive? Where is he?"

Fin gestured to the black Lexus. "He's still inside."

"I-I couldn't get to him." Olivia whispered. "I tried, but I couldn't-"

"Liv-" Fin was starting to worry more than he already was. Olivia was stiff, her hair laid on top of her head in a gesture of exasperation. "They're going to get him out. He'll be fine."

"Chim!" Bobby called for his second in command. "Let's get this SUV back."

At attempting to turn the engine on, he got no signs of life. "Nothing cap!"

"Then we're going to have to push it." Bobby ordered. "Eddie, Buck give us a hand. Chim put it in neutral." Together the four pushed the truck away from the smaller car. Letting it come to a stop just a few feet away. "Alright, hand me the jaws of life." Using the large tool, they ripped the passenger door open. "Hen you're up!"

"I'll slip in the back seat." Chim grabbed his bag, sliding behind the driver's seat. "Putting on the collar now."

Hen was worried about the blood loss. "There is more blood in the car than in him."

"I know." Chim secured the neck collar, before getting a line prepped. "What do you think he did?"

"Based on the suit? A lawyer." Hen mumbled, running her hands across his body. "We need to get him moved, counted five GSW so far."

Olivia watched as the two paramedics stepped out of the car before two more helped pull Barba out. Olivia didn't even realize she was moving until someone stopped her advancements. "He-"

"Ma'am, you need to stand back."

Out of reflex, she showed him her credentials. "I'm NYPD, that's my-he's my-"

"Husband?" The Captain asked. He wasn't sure if she heard him or not, but he recognized the look in her eyes. It was the same Athena would give him whenever he got hurt. "Alright, you can stay here. But no closer."

"I-okay." She wasn't paying attention to him. Her attention was on Barba.

Hen grabbed a pair of scissors, cutting his shirts off. "That's more than five." She whispered to herself. "We need to stop the bleeding before we can move him."

"How many do you see?" Chim worked on getting the line into Barba's arm.

Hen's eyes scanned across the man's chest and abdomen. "12."

"Starting the blood." Opening the line, watched as a bit of his color began to return.

"Let's get him moving." Wrapping a gauge and bandage they managed to stop Barba from bleeding out.

Olivia exhaled at seeing the slight nod the captain gave her. That same breath was caught in her throat at the loud drawn-out beep. Everything became in slow motion around her. She saw every movement they gave, the wind around them slowing down. The only sound was the one that told her Barba's heart wasn't beating.

Nash spotted the woman making her way towards them once more. Pulling her into his arms, he held her as they watched his team. He felt her tense shoulders and stiff back. Bobby was aware of how close she was to breaking. "They got him."

"He's crashing!" Chim yelled. "Starting compression."

Hen grabbed the manual air, pumping after every few seconds. "Come on. Come on." Looking over at her Captain, she grimaced at the look on the woman. "You're wife is watching. Don't let this be her last memory of you." As if he heard her the wonderful beeping of a heart rhythm hit their ears. "Let's move!" With quick efficiency, they loaded him into the back of the ambulance. Hen turned to the woman staring after them. "You riding along?"

Fin placed a hand on her shoulder, nudging her forward. "Go, I'll make sure everything here is handled." Seeing his captain practically sprint to the ambulance, he stood watch as it disappeared. "Rollins!"

"Yeah Sargent?"

"Get forensic down here." Fin ordered. "Carisi and Amaro, start vetting the bystanders. See if we can find out what the hell happened." He looked over at the store with a camera in front. "I want this to be clean."

Fin looked up to see the others walk in. "What did you find out?"

"Everyone we talked to agrees on the first half of the story." Amaro started. "Light turned green, Barba drove forward and the Suburban came out of nowhere. Slammed into the Lexus, jamming him against the parked car."

"And the second part?" Fin asked.

Carisi sighed. "Some say it was one person that jumped out of the car and started shooting. Others that it was two. No one can agree on what he or they looked like."

"At least we know it was a planned and not at random." Fin muttered.

Amanda frowned. "That's good why?"

"It means they are after him." Amaro picked up on the words quickly. "Also means they will try again."

"He's been greenlit." She scoffed. "That's just great."

"Detective." The store clerk appeared from the back of the store. "Here is the flash drive with the footage."

"Thank you." Fin grabbed the item, staring at it contently. "Let's meet up with Liv."