Disclaimer: Yeah I wish.
Author's Note: Big thanks to criss128, princess-dreamer, moonlitclarity, beaglicious and dshortklutz for the wonderful reviews. Figured you deserved an update.
Ray endured the worst flight he had ever been on, it wasn't the poor service or the cramped legroom or even the small child that insisted on rhythmically kicking the back of his chair; It was his inability to get the way she had looked out of his head, the complete desolation that he had put behind those beautiful brown eyes.
She had come to him finally ready to repair their ruptured friendship and he had been unable to let her in. He didn't want to hurt her but he really didn't know if he could live with just being friends.
He was in love with her and he hated it. It made him feel weak and foolish.
If he didn't love her so much he could be the friend she so badly wanted, be exactly what she needed.
He knew she didn't let people in easily, in all the time he had known her she had only ever really let Abby or himself in. He knew that even Michael had struggled to get in her head, to understand her.
She was so closed off, so hard to read, but she had trusted Ray. He had worn away her tightly held defences, gotten to know her, the real Neela. The brave but scared woman who was so warm and loyal beneath the cool and distant shell she constructed to protect herself.
He blamed her entirely; if she hadn't let him in he wouldn't be feeling like this. He would be enjoying the carefree existence, a different woman for every night of the week. Beautiful faces and bodies that he wouldn't mentally compare to her and find lacking.
Most of all he blamed her for the fact that no matter how much he wanted to hate her he couldn't.
Brett met him at the airport with a huge grin and a hearty hug.
"Hey man, it's so good to see you" he enthused genuinely.
"You too man" and he meant it, after all the resentment he had felt after being dropped he was still glad to see a friendly face.
"Rough flight? " Brett asked he could sense the tension in Ray instantly.
"Yeah" Ray sighed heaving his bag over his shoulder.
"Well come on then, you can take a shower and crash" Brett grabbed his bag off him before he could argue and led the way out into glorious Californian sunshine.
The drive was fairly quiet but easy, the silences that interspersed the fragmented catching up felt natural and not at all uncomfortable.
Ray was thankful that despite Brett's acute ability to read him, he hadn't yet mentioned the reason they both knew he was here.
After his shower he still felt the tension of the flight and his hyperactive brain weighing heavy on him, even the crippling fatigue he felt could not stifle it.
"You want to go get a beer? "He asked Brett all prepared to drown his brain and stop its incessant thinking.
"Sure" It was how dozens of drunken nights had started before and Ray hoped tonight was no exception. If he was going to get any rest he had to dull the chatter of his thoughts.
They stumbled into Brett's apartment at around three, they were both trashed and singing the same old songs they had always sung when they were drunk.
The familiarity made it so easy to forget the past and just be two great friends singing too loud and stumbling about in the dark.
"Hey you know what you should do? " Brett laughed falling into the couch heavily.
"Sleep for a week? " Ray suggested at least fifty percent serious. He felt at least two days were needed to rid him of his bone deep exhaustion.
"No man, you should stay here, like for good, move in" Brett slurred closing his eyes.
By the time Rays slow reacting brain thought of an answer Brett was snoring loudly.
"Maybe" He told the sleeping drunk before heading to his long awaited bed.