A series of unfortunate 'sexual' events
Yugi: Hello everyone and it's time for another update and this chapter was decided by you lot and I didn't change it in anyway. Right I just need someone to say the results for me?
Mai: Can I do it sis?
Yugi: Why should I let you do it then?
Mai: Well if you don't I'll rip up your 8 Yu-Gi-Oh! posters and your Dark Magician Girl card!!!
Yugi: No!!! Fine you can read the results...
Mai: The votes were close but today's chapter with 7 votes is...Marik and Malik.
Yugi: YES!!!!! CELEBRATE GOOD TIMES COME ON!!! Er sorry 'bout that I hate Yami/Seto pairings but they only got 5 votes.
Mai: Ah sorry Yami/Seto fans it was never meant to be.
Yugi: Yep and if you want someone to blame well it's Mai because she was the last person to vote and she picked...
Mai: MARIK AND MALIK!! All the things I want to do to them in bed...
Yugi: You're too young...so am I actually
Mai: Ah boo hoo.
Yugi: Shut up! Look isn't that Tala over there?
Mai: Where? Bye Yugi I have things to take care of.
Yugi: Bye. Right time for the thank you's.
Hakiri-Nerfertiri: What's wrong with Grandpa being with Pegasus? Apart from the fact Pegasus is 27, it's the truth he is 27 and Grandpa is 72. Oh if anyone wants to look that up go to it tells you everyone's birthdays. It sounds wrong but don't forget Yami's 5000 (or 3000 depends what series your watching) and Yugi's 16 so that's a huge difference. But you agree with me about Téa!! YES YUGI/YAMI ALL THE WAY!!! You sounded like my friend Luff when you said you were worried about the couple, you see she doesn't like the idea of one of my other stories couple...Yugi/Yami/Atemu. Well I'm glad the chapter made you happy and I hope this one does too. Happy New Year and thank you.
Speaking of my friend Luff she is very talented in typing and so is her sister S.Chensu and I feel that their stories are way better then mine. Please would you be so kind and read their story called The Pressures of Life. Luff is my best friend and this is one of the things I could do for her. Their stories are on our profile so please have a look at their stories. Thank you.
autumnburn: Well here's the next chapter and because you said either pairing I put in for both. I'm glad you liked the chapter but it if there were a lot of spelling mistakes I'm sorry because I wrote it at 6 in the morning on Christmas Day. Hope you got the presents you wanted and have a good 2005.
Yakari Taito: Thanks for the vote but sadly more people preferred the psychopath pairing then the very wrong pairing (Yami/Seto). Vote again at the bottom of the chapter. Thanks and Happy New Year.
Aoi Dragon: Sorry but it's Marik and Malik i'm afraid. I just hate Yami/Seto but I didn't change the votes in anyway. You will get another chance to vote for that pairing again. Enjoy this chapter and hope you enjoy 2005.
April: Your like my sister because she finds them sexy and has a crush on them. It's actually perfectly normal to have a crush on a anime character because they are drawn to perfection. No offence but Malik and Marik aren't really that attractive nor are Bakura and Ryou but if you fancie them good for you. I find Yami and Yugi very sexy and there are many things I want to do with them two but please don't be ashamed for fancing a Yu-Gi-Oh! character. Hope you like this chapter and have a Happy New Year.
Kay-Dee-S: Slashy? Sorry to sound very stupid but please tell me what you meant by slashy? Sorry if the chapter isn't Yami/Seto (Thank Ra) but you get another chance at the end of the chapter. Thanks and Happy New Year.
Ranma Higurashi: You might of worked out something there but all will be revealed in the last chapter which is ages away. Enjoy the chapter and thanks for the review.
RyouChan: Ryou/Yugi wasn't an option but in this chapter it is an option so go down and read the chapter. Then click the very pretty purple button and type in Ryou/Yugi. Thanks for the review and Happy New Year.
sami: Well you have you're favourite pairing to read this chapter and I think I'm using your idea for the actually eavesdropping event as well which means the chapter is dedicated to you. Thanks for the review and Happy New Year.
jonouchi-kaiba-mokie: Thumbs up to you because I agree with the whole Yami/Seto thing. It was never meant to be because the hate each other so much. Yami belongs to Yugi and Seto belongs to Joey. Yami/Yugi and Seto/Joey. Thanks for agreeing with me and here is the next chapter. I'm glad someone actually has the graphic novels otherwise no one would of understood what the hell I was going on about. Happy New Year.
Flaring Emerald: No I wasn't offended I was just saying my point that's all. Sorry if I offended you. Do the Jap Sub episodes have the same voice actors as the dubbed episodes or are they spoken in Japanese. Haven't watched any of the subbed episodes but we are only on the 3rd Yu-Gi-Oh! series in the dubbed series (Waking the Dragons) so we are quite a way off 'till the end and I say the very last episode is very upsetting! England is so slow at getting these episodes! Oh well hope you like this chapter and happy new year.
mellinde: No please don't die because then I can't get your reviews. Glad you liked the chapter but sadly this chapter isn't Yami/Seto. Have another go at the end of the chapter to get that pairing. Thanks again and have a cool 2005.
m&m: I had a feeling when I read your pename that you liked the Marik/Malik pairing so here it is. Hope you like it. Have a good new year.
Duelgirl: Sorry if I'm updating too late but I have other stories that I'm typing so I have to space out my time on those different stories. I will try to update where I will only leave a 3 day gap in between. So basically every Wednesday and Saturday but I will do this to British time so sorry if it comes to anyone on a Thursday or Sunday. The other reason why I update later is because I have reached that age in live were those mean things called teachers give you coursework over the holidays and also I have very important exams (according to the teachers) that will take place in May and I'm revising for it at the moment. Damn GSCE's and also I'm drawing a lot of Yugi/Yami pictures in my school art sketch book which I'm not sure if I'm allowed to do it or not? Oh well enjoy this chapter and have a nice New year.
Mai Valkov (or to me my annoying very smart sister Mai): So did you want me to do Yami/Seto in this chapter or was it Marik/Malik? Oh yes Marik/Malik! Thank you for saving me from writing a torture known as the evil Yami/Seto pairing and also would you do me a favour...STOP SAYING I FANCIE SILVA (SHAMAN KING) AND KRATOS (TALES OF SYMPHONIA) BECAUSE THEY SOUND LIKE YAMI AND YUGI'S VOICE. I KNOW SILVA'S VOICE IS ACTUALLY DONE BY THE SAME VOICE ACTOR (Dan Green) BUT I'M NOT SURE ABOUT KRATOS. SO I DON'T FANCIE THEM OK!. Thanks for the review.
There you go and as you can tell I'm very sad because I know all the voice actors names and what other animes they are in...so in other words I'm very, very sad. If there's a character you like and you want to know the voice actors name and what other animes they are in just say so but that proves I am very sad. Right now onto the story.
I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh! (damn) Kazuki Takahashi does (Lucky Guy)
Enjoy.
Yugi
Key
speech: Ishizu/Isis Talking
speech: Malik/Yami Marik Talking
speech: Marik/Mariku Talking
speech: Odion/Rishid Talking
Chapter Six: Marik and Malik
In life many people tend to say we are different and no two people are the same, but is this true. Did they really look at the facts because there are many things that make us the same. Girls wear tarty short skirts and dollops of make up placed around there face. (A.N: Sounds like that Bitch Lacey who goes to my school! She makes every boy in the lesson pull her thong and insists on sucking on a lolly pop all through the day. You're lucky if you don't know her!) Boys tend to wear the usual football shirt and the very important baseball cap upon their head, yet people say we are different. We all go to work and school but there is one thing that nobody in the entire planet enjoys to do... clean their bedrooms.
It was a busy day in the Domino Museum as guards started to close the Egyptian exhibits for the night. Among these guards a women with long, sleek black hair with a simple band placed through it. Her body was tanned as her aquamarine eyes looked at a tablet in a glass display. Upon this tablet there was a battle scene between a hot sexy Pharaoh and a not so hot High Priest which was basically the duel of all time. This tablet was the reason that this women had first appeared in the City of Domino. She had arrived with her younger brother and her adopted bother to get rid of the darkness that lurked within. Sadly this darkness still lives with them but he has had a change of heart ever since he watched his favourite Care Bears DVD. This darkness was her brothers light Malik and ever since he turned up Marik had become more secretive and always ended up looking flushed every morning. Ishizu always had her ideas but she always asked Odion to keep a close eye on the two boys these days because of them hanging around more with the Tombrobber known as Bakura. She had no problems with Ryou but it was the fact that she felt that all Yami's had been setting bad examples for their lights.
Ishizu walked out the museum as the sky stated to become a range of colours as Ra was setting down for another day. She smiled and then started to walk down the road towards her house. As she continued to walk she thought of all the things the Yami's had done to their hikari's turn them from sweet innocent little lights into very different people. Yugi was before a very sweet and charming lad but ever since Yami was around it looked like the short boy had started to wear even more leather and lots of things that would seem like bondage (A.N: Drool! Ah I think I'm going to faint. What a sight!! Yugi in bondage!! Yes I love it!!) to the citizen's of Domino. Was he trying to impress someone because the only person that would seem to like that stuff would be his look alike? Ryou on the other hand was spiking his hair a bit to give it a more wilder image and he was wearing very low cut tops that showed of his navel and creamy skin. Why was he changing his look? Finally her brother Marik seemed to enjoy wearing silk shirts that were always open at the front to show the ladies and men his bronzed skin. Why were all the hikari's doing this because the images they were showing now were basically ones the Yami's would enjoy. Ishizu just sighed at this thought as she came closer towards the Ishtar household.
Marik was sitting on his large double bed as the headphones in his ears played music making Marik lose himself with the tune. Next to him sat Malik who was reading his favourite magazine 'Yami's Weekly' which was only available in the Shadow Realm. Every issue it would tell you information about different Yami's in the world and Malik was enjoying this issue immensely due to it being about the great Pharaoh himself, Yami. Malik sat and read until he came to a certain article. His lavender eyes scanned the words until he burst out laughing, hitting his light in the process. Marik gave a cold stare at his dark as Malik stared at him like he had done nothing. "What's so funny Malik?" asked the annoyed hikari. Malik just flicked back to the page in the magazine he was reading and looked for the article again. He found it in the end and couldn't help but giggle again. "You have got to read this it will kill you I swear Marik." laughed the deranged yami. Marik just nodded and so Mailk read him the article. "Er hem. 'When the young Pharaoh Atemu was at the age of 18 he had a party in his palace and invited all those who were close to him. All his Priests were there including the High Priest who was known at that time not to be the fun guy.' "Malik paused to get some air. " 'At this party a range of belly dancers were on show as the Pharaoh continued to drink the wine that was picked specially for this occasion. This ended up with Atemu being drunk and so was his High Priest Seth which many believed they were a couple at this time. Sadly this was a lie but even worse for Atemu was that he actually slept with two people that evening. One was the High Priest Seth and the other being a belly dancer who was actually Akefia, King of Thieves in drag."
All was silent after that until Marik and Malik once again fell into fits of laughter. "Malik, That explains why Yami doesn't like Seto or Bakura because he had sex with them both!!" the hikari sighed as he tried getting his breath back. Malik looked at him and nodded. "That's not all of it listen to this. 'Now we have a actual feedback from Akefia himself, who is now known as Bakura. 'Trickin' the pharaoh? Man it was hilarious!!! All you do is dress as a woman, wiggle your hips a bit, and there you have it! A dumbfounded pharaoh ready for action. I just couldn't believe it really, either the booze had made him half-sighted or he was just plain stupid, I mean, he couldn't even tell who I was!!!! That's the thing these days, it's not the guards which you can't rely on, it's the dude they're protectin', 'cos if he makes one stupid mistake such as this, then... well, that's it ain't it? Sounds like good old Bakura to me" . Marik nodded and then took the article away from his Yami. "Hey look they have feedback from Seto Kaiba as well. Listen Malik. 'Neither me or my company were responsible for the actions of my so called yami and that stupid Pharaoh because it never happened. I don't have a High Preist called Seth for a Yami because I don't believe in this hocus pocus crap.' Yep that is so Seto Kaiba!". So the boys continued to laugh as it echoed all through the house.
Odion was sitting in his bedroom drinking a warm mug of tea reading his magazine 'Egyptian Babes' until sounds of Marik and Malik echoed through the house. He sighed and placed his drink and magazine down as he walked towards the blonde boy's bedrooms. He soon reached the room and went inside to see that the room was still a mess and that Ishizu would be home in a minute. Odion stood before his master and hit both him and Malik round the head with Malik's magazine. "Master Marik, Miss Ishizu asked you and Master Malik to tidy up this room before she comes back." said the tall Egyptian. Marik continued to rub his sore head and replied "Yes I know Odion but there's plenty of time before she comes back from the museum" .
"Marik, Malik, Odion I'm back. Hope that room's sorted out and clean Marik Ishtar!"
Malik and Marik's face's paled in colour as that same thought came to their minds. "Oh..." "Shit!" The said in unison and pushed Odion out the door. "Odion don't tell Ishizu just say we're busy at the moment and she can't come in ok!?!" rushed Marik. "Yeah, and if you spill the beans on us you're going to the Shadow Realm. Ow Marik you didn't have to hit me!" wined Malik as soon sounds of magazines being picked up and bag being filled were heard.
Ishizu walked down towards Marik and Malik's bedroom and noticed Odion walking away. She grabbed hold of his shirt sleeve and whispered "They didn't do their room did they?" as Odion only nodded in agreement. Ishizu mentally sighed and let Odion walk away. She stood outside the boy's bedroom and heard weird noises coming from within the room. Ishizu walked closer towards the door and rested her ear against the doorframe. They say women are the smartest creatures on the planet but if that is true why, oh why, is Ishizu falling into the eavesdropping craze? Rest in Peace Ishizu.
Inside the bedroom with Marik and Malik
"Right that's all done now. Let's go then Malik."
"No not yet we still have to polish your rod."
"My rod? But it's fine. Look it's firm and hard! What else do you want from it?"
"Oh I want a lot more from your rod. A lot more Marik!"
"Like what?"
"Well, I want it to be squeaky clean."
"If you want it to be like that? Then it's all yours!"
"Don't mind if I do Marik."
"Well what do you want first big boy?"
"Pass me that slippery stuff over there."
"What you mean polish?"
"Yep now watch this!"
Squeaking was heard coming from the room as it also seemed sounds of light moaning were coming along with it. Ishizu was worried at first but this was starting to get her paranoid. She wanted to walk away but she felt she needed to figure out the truth.
"Look you missed a spot!"
"Where?"
"Right there!"
"Ok. Hold still!"
"Ah Ra your being too rough. Start of slowly would you."
"Ok. Is this slow enough for you?"
"Yes but please now can you go a bit faster?"
"Is this better?"
"Oh Ra yes!"
"Put your hand on mine because it will cause more friction"
"Is this ok for you Malik?"
"Yep now move in time with me. Up, down, up, down."
"Up, down, up, down. I get it. Have you noticed that the my rod is becoming more slippery?"
"Because it's finished. See nice and clean."
"I agree with you ,but how about we do your rod now Malik?"
"You won't be doing anyone's rod Marik Ishtar! I heard you and on- hey how come your both holding the Millenium Rod?" asked Ishizu as she saw the very clean rod placed in both of their hands. She sighed mentally and soon began to laugh. "Ah Ra. I thought you two were polishing...no this is so funny...see you at dinner boys." and so she left with a red face and laughter escaping her mouth. This left the two boys puzzled in the bedroom until Malik as well began to laugh. Marik just stood there scowling at how his sister could think of such a rude gay thing. "Hey Marik your sister is so funny she thought I was doing something with your...".
"Say it and your dead!"
"It."
"Malik!!!!!!!"
(End of Chapter)
Hope you all enjoyed the chapter and just think that was the last chapter of 2004! So everyone have a Happy New Year and hope my and Mai's stories make enjoyable reading in 2005.
I'm happy though because I have a Yu-Gi-Oh! Calendar for 2005 so I will see a character for every month but I like January because it's my birthday soon and also it has Yami on that month. Yes I love Yami!!! Right now it's your chance to vote...
Next chapter: Yami/Seto or Yugi/Ryou.
Leave your vote in a review and lets see if the Yami/Seto fans can get the chapter they want or will the two lights Yugi/Ryou be more of your thing. Good luck on getting your couple. Leave a review and thanks again.
Happy New Year!!! Next Chapter up on 5th January 2005
Yugi