"He-hello?" Elena asked, her tone indicating that she'd been woken up.
"Laney. .J-Josh was here. ..he. ..he shot Rude..." his voice was cracking. .." 'm'sorry if I woke you, but. ." and he broke off, he'd been hyperventilating almost since it happened.
One could almost hear Elena shaking the sleepiness from her person. "What? Rude's been shot?"
"I'm in the ambulance with him now. .the cops picked up Josh, but fuck. .." again that cracking, almost whispery voice.
"How's he doing?" she asked carefully.
"Not good, Laney. .." He was doing his damndest to keep his voice even, clutching Rude's hand in his, trying to keep it from shaking and failing.
"How 'not good', Reno?" She wanted -- no, needed -- specifics.
"It's a chest wound, Laney, he was bleeding from the mouth afterward. ..breath all rattly. .." He was trying to compose himself, to put on the Turk front, but it was so very difficult when that attachment was there, and so strong.
"Fuck!" The normally calm, has an answer to everything Elena was too overcome with the realization of just how bad it was to censor herself. "Which hospital?"
Reno gave her the directions before asking her to call Rufus and hanging up, still clutching that still hand in his..."Hang on, we're almost there. ..I'm not leavin'. .."
There was a shrill noise as Rude's eyes rolled back into his head.
"Sir! I need you to move!" The paramedic shouted in the small space, quickly checking Rude's vitals then beginning chest compressions.
Reno moved, into the corner, curling his knees into his chest, those green eyes frightened. .. "Please. ..don't you dare fucking leave me. ..don't you dare. ..I need you!"
The paramedic swore as they pulled up to the emergency room doors. He turned to Reno. "Sir, I'm going to need you to get as far out of the way as you can the second those doors open. Understand?"
Reno nodded, his face was pale, he looked as if he was on the verge of passing out from shock himself, but he composed himself. ..stepping out of the way as the doors opened. ..it wasn't until they took Rude in that he sank against the wall. ..
Elena had arrived about 10 minutes later, nearly running into the emergency room. "Reno!" she called, glancing around furiously for the redhead.
Reno was sitting against the wall outside the trauma room, shaking nearly uncontrollably, in complete shock, waiting on news. "He coded on the way in. .." And he lowered his head to his knees. "'smy fault. ..I shocked him. ..he had that fucking gun to my head and I shocked him to keep from getting my head blown off. ..an' that's when it happened."
Elena frowned as she mentally played out how the situation must have went. She knelt between Reno's knees, grasping his chin to make him look at her. "It's not your fault," she said plainly.
Reno melted into her, he was shaking like a leaf, he'd not even been this terrified during the fire when he'd thought he'd lost Rude to the flames.
There was a tiny wince as she felt something like a tiny, almost impercievable... almost like a menstural cramp. She ignored it, though, in favour of soothing words in Reno's ear. "He'll be fine... He's been shot before, remember?"
"He's never died on the way in. ..you ok, Laney."
"I'm fine." Elena knew that whatever it was with her, it wasn't nearly as important and keeping Reno's spirits up. "Rude's a strong man, you know that, and he's got a strong desire to live. He's not going to give up without one hell of a fight."
Reno looked up as a doctor approached, "Please. ..tell me he made it through. . .please. .." his eyes showed an almost fear of hoping.
"He survived the surgery to remove the bullet," The doctor said carefully. "However, he's still in critical condition. The potions we tried to speed up the healing weren't taking as well as we'd hoped. Seems there's even a limit to how well the potion-enhanced body can recover."
"Can I see him?" He stood up, trying to not show how shaky he was.
The doctor's sigh had a touch of pity to it. "No more than ten minutes. And he's unconscious. I'd prefer you not to wake him."
Reno nodded. "Thanks.." He followed him back, his belly was flp flopping, he was fighting the urge to throw up.
Elena went with him, fully intending to stay in the hallway with that look the doctor gave her.
Reno went in, taking Rude's hand whispering an apology. .." I love you. .you better make it through this, or I'm gonna be right behind you and kicking your ass from one end of the lifestream to the other for leaving me. ..I can't live without you, big guy. . .just can't."
The bald man gave no response, paled skin looking for all the world like he'd already passed on to the Lifestream. The only indication that he was alive was the fact that he was breathing on his own, for the most part.
Reno then saw another flash of red in the hallway, and gave Elena a looko that said "don't let him leave. or in here." he bent down, giving Rude a kiss on his forehead. "I'll be right back, love."
Elena watched the limping redhead go to the nurses' station, inquiring about the status of one Rudy Urar. She unconsciously placed a hand on her lower abdomen as she listened to him speak.
Reno stormed after him. "Number one, how the HELL did you make bail, number 2, how DARE you show your fucking face here looking for my husband after what you did?"
"I don't need to answer to you," came Josh's scathing words as he turned back towards the nurse on duty. "What is his condition, please?"
"He damn near died because of you, and they don't have to tell YOU shit. ..he's not yours anymore.
Reno called one of the security people. "I want him to be kept away from my husband, please."
When the orderly came to the station, he took one look at the two redheads and said, "If you two can't play nice, neither of you will stay in here." His tone was the same that Rude would take when he was not in the mood to be questioned.
"He was the one responsible for my husband being in the condition he is, I believe as I am the one responsible for his care, I have a say in who sees him, am I correct?"
"Keep disturbing the other patients with your noise and it won't matter who you are," the orderly threatened. He was used to dealing with overly hysterical loved ones of patients, and he knew that most times, a little tough love helped more than a kind smile.
"Listen, I'm willing to tone it down a notch, just keep THAT." he gestured at Josh "Away from Rude. ..It's all I ask. ..he shot my husband and partner, after holding a gun to my head I might add, and I don't want him to see him, simple as that."
"We're not the police," The orderly said calmly. He had a very Rude-like demeanor. "So we can't say who did what. We're just here to heal." He paused, looking over at Josh. "Mr. Urar is in critical condition, but if he makes it through the night, he'll probably be upgraded to serious, but stable."
"Thank you," Josh whispered, then glared at Reno before turning on his heel and walking away.
Reno stepped outside to call Rude's family. "come on, one of you answer.."
"This better be a fucking hot blonde with huge tits..." Eric mumbled into the phone. Ah, the wonders of the time zone.
"Eric, you're brother's been shot. ..Josh showed his bitch ass up.. .if you'd be so damn kind as to inform everyone else it'd be very nice.
Eric was slow to come to coherency. "This isn't a hot blonde with huge tits, is it?" he asked, pausing for a moment before it finally sank in. "What? Sam's been shot? He's right fucking here..."
"NO, Rude.. tell Sam. ..and the rest of your damn family, I'm not in the mood for bullshit right now, just know I'm probably going to kick Josh Miller's ass, whether Rude wants me to or not." He was. ..pissed and terrified beyond words were the gist of it.
"Yeah, yeah, call me when you get Miller trussed up like a pig. I got a little something for that twerp..." Eric said, then hung up and went directly back to sleep. It was, after all, rather early in the morning there.
Reno went back inside, heading back to see his husband, sitting next to him, holding his hand. "I'm gonna kick his ass, yo. ..you can chew me out for it later ...I love you." before stepping back out, chasing Josh down, finding him half-way down the street he whirls him around. "You. ..are gonna get your ass whooped."
"You would hit a cripple?" Josh challenged.
"One who put a gun to my head and damn near killed the man I love. ..damn straight."
"Go ahead, be just like him," Josh taunted. "Beat me, hit me until I bleed then fuck me raw, just like he used to." Not the most sane one of the bunch, that Joshua Miller.
Reno stepped in to deliver the first punch. ..before he felt a sharp pain under his ribs...looking down in shock then hearing a scream...a familiar voice. saying "don't hurt my papa anymore!" before crumpling to the ground, watching the silver blade sliding out of him as he fell. "bastard. ."
"If I can't have him," Josh whispered, breath hot as he slid his cheek against Reno's face. "You can't have him either." With that, he turned away, sliding into the shadows far easier than it should have been for a man with such a pronounced limp.
Reno coughs. ..choking on his own blood. ..doing his damndest to crawl for a spot where he'd be seen. ..calling for help, but his voice is little more than a whisper...he knew he was hurt, and he knew it was bad. .his eyelids growing heavy as he waited for the paramedics to get there.
"Denzel?" Tifa's voice floated through the air. "Rennan? Where did you two run off to?"
Rennan yells out "Tifa! Papa's hurt!"
Tifa starts walking towards Rennan's voice, waving over Denzel, who had just come from the candy store across the street. "Rennan? Where are you?"
"Over here, Tifa. .." Rennan sits next to Reno, the older redhead's blood on his hands, the child looks shellshocked. ..he had wiitnessed the entire altercation.
Tifa looked down around the corner, instantly taking in the blood on the two redheads. "My god!" she yelled, then turned to Denzel. "Get me some hi-potions from that item shop there. Hurry!" She tossed a handful of gil to the older boy who nodded and did as he was told.
Reno's eyes rolled back. ..skin growing even paler as blood bubbled at his lips. .."Tell Rennan and Rude I love 'em. ." were his last words before passing out.
Denzel returned quickly, dropping to his knees as he handed Tifa the hi-potions. "Here," he said. Unspoken was his request to let him help.
"Get Rennan out of here," Tifa told the boy. "I'm counting on you to make sure he stays safe."
"No, I wanna stay! Bad man hurt my papa!"
"Come on, Rennan," The older boy said, taking the young redhead's hand and gently pulling him towards the sidewalk. "Tifa'll help him. I promise."
"I wanna catch that man. ...he hurt papa. .."
"There's nothing you can do right now," Denzel protested, for once not looking to Tifa for support. Was the boy finally beginning to step into his own? "Come on. We gotta go to the hospital. That's where Tifa's taking your dad."
Rennan nodded. ..he didn't know about Rude yet, either.
Smiling gently, Denzel took a better grip on Rennan's hand before he led him up the block towards the hospital.
Reno's ears held white noise as they wheeled him inside. ..in his delirium he started fighting. "You're hurting me!"
As the orderlies held him down, a trauma nurse shouted, "Sedate him"
As the sedative hit his eyes closed...the last thing he saw was his son's frightened face as he clutched Denzel's hand.
"Ma'am are you this man's wife?" the nurse asked. She'd just come on shift and knew, just knew, it was going to be a long day.
Rennan looked up at the nurse. "Papa's hurt. ..where's Papa Rude, he should be here.. ."
The nurse crouched down, offering a smile to the little boy. "Your papa will be just fine," she said before looking up at Tifa. "Who is this 'papa Rude' he's asking about?"
"Where IS Rude?" she wondered outloud.
Rennan walked down, and when he saw where Reno was being taken he followed.. .then ran back to Tifa. ..his eyes tearing. "Papa Rude's hurt, too. .." The two of course had been roomed together.
Tifa turned to Denzel. "Denzel, take him home. He doesn't need to see this," she said.
The elder boy nodded, reaching for Rennan's hand.
"I don't wanna go!" He yelled as Denzel dragged him out.
Tifa just shook her head, moving towards the nurses' station. "Could I get the condition of Reno Tarshill and Rude Urar?" she asked.
"They are both in serious condiitn at the moment, Mr Urar was just upgraded from critical no more than 5 minutes ago. ..we are awaiting Mr Tarshil to be stabalized enough to be taken into surgery, where he will have his lung and right ventricle repaired due to damage from the knife. If you had not applied those hi potions in a timely manner he would have bled out on the way here. He owes you his life."
"Wouldn't be the first time," Tifa mumbled. She wrote her mobile number down on a piece of paper. "Please keep me informed if their conditions change. I'm currently fostering their child, and I'm sure he'd like to be kept up to date." With that, she left.
When Reno finally awakened he had yet another scar across his chest to add to the one Loz had given him...he looked over to see Rude looking less pale, more himself, and wondered just how many days he'd lost.
"I see you're finally awake," the doctor said from the doorway. She smiled softly in the dim light. "He looks better, doesn't he?"
"Yeah...what day is it?"
"Thursday evening. You have been out for three days," she answered, her tone almost sad.
"Thursday. ..shit. ..supposed to meet the attorney tomorrow for the custody hearing. .."
"You're not going anywhere," the doctor replied. "At least not for another few days."
"What happened. ..I'm gonna lose my kid if I don't make the hearing. ..and why is it you sound. .like something happened?"
She nodded towards the prone figure of Rude. "He crashed against shortly after you were admitted. He was clinically dead for a minute, and... he hasn't woken up yet. We're afraid there might have been some brain damage..." Her voice trailed off, almost as if she were loathe to tell the redhead the whole story.
"Talk to me, please. ."
He struggled out of bed, almost floored by the pain, but he didn't care. ..he had to get to his partner. "You better come back to me. .. whole and sane. ..I mean it.. .I need you. .."
The doctor's gaze was firmly on the floor. "If he doesn't show any signs of improvement by the end of the weekend..." she took a deep breath. This was her least favourite part of the job. "We'll need to make arrangements for either his continued care or..."
Reno knelt next to the bed. ..his eyes tearing.. ."Don't you dare fucking leave me. ..don't you dare. .I can't live without you. .. Please. .please wake up. ..please. .." He kissed his mouth fervently. ...his eyes beginning to overflow.
"Sir, please..." her voice was soft as she spoke and took a step forward. "I'm... we're not entirely sure he can even hear you."
"I know he can. .. I have faith in him dammit, you better too. .." He kept kissing those lips...wrapping his arms around his husband, his ivs ripping out but he didn't care.. .he needed Rude to wake up. ..he needed Rude with him.
The doctor was quick with a Sleep spell, the power coming from the tiny materia stone in her ring. She preferred the spell to actual sedatives anyway. With a nod to the orderly that had appeared at the door, she set about replacing Reno's IVs and helping move him back to the bed.
"You know he's not going to be happy about being sleeped. .he really loves him."
"I know," she replied. "But I can't risk him jepordizing both his and Mr. Urar's health."
Reno when he finally woke up it was Friday morning. ..he saw sharp jawline and pulled back hair. ..his vision was blurred. "I'm guessing the boss called you. .."
"Indeed," Tseng replied, moving to no longer lean over Reno.
"Did someone call Ms Berry? She's gonna think. ..Gods, don't even know what she's gonna think."
"She will be arriving this afternoon around 4," Tseng replied, absently straightening an already straight cuff.
"An.. " he was almost afraid to ask, he gulped. "How's he. "
"They took him off all artificial machines," Tseng said carefully. "He's completely breathing on his own. However..."
"They're afraid. ..he won't be himself. ..shit. .."
"Exactly." It hurt Tseng far more than he let on to say that.
Reno turned away. ."He's gotta. ..he's just gotta. ..shit. .." He was distressed. ..still terrified, and Tseng would see it clearly. "Think about how you'd feel if it were the boss laying there..."
"I understand your pain," Tseng said carefully. With Reno, things like that were always dangerous ground. "However, you must remember what Rude would want you to do. Getting yourself worked up to the point of re-injuring yourself would be completely counterproductive. You need to let yourself heal so you can help him heal."
"Sometimes. ..I wonder why I keep going with this shit. .." He slapped his hand across his eyes, mentally begging Rude to wake up. .to turn those brown eyes his way and tell him everything was allright.
A groan was heard from the bed across the room, but it was cut off just as quickly as it started.
"Come on, come on, you can do it. ..I got faith in you. ..an' I love you. ..come back ta me. ..please."
He licked his lips, mouth dry. He tried to speak a single word, but nothing came out.
Tseng spun on his heels instantly, making a beeline for the nurses' station.
Reno is on his feet, pulling himself next to Rude's bed, kissing him firmly. "You better be you, yo. .."
He opened his eyes, turning his head away from the redhead he saw over him. "Where?" he managed.
"Hospital. .Josh messed you up. ." Then it suddenly hits. .""Rude. ..no baby no. ..you better remember. ..I need you. .." He looked to Tseng with a helpless look. ..eyes dry. ..but so much hurt in them. .."Fuck, haven't we suffered enough?"
"Rudolph," Tseng said sharply.
His eyes snapped instantly to the man who spoke. "Sir?" he said, then paused, face telling how he wasn't entirely sure why he said what he did.
Reno strode outside, picking up Rude's bloodstained cigaratte pack, iv and all. ..he was . ..well upset wasn't the word for it.."I need a fucking cigarette, if the nurse gives me a problem I'm gonna fuckin' beat her."
"Reno," Tseng's voice was just as sharp as he turned to the walking Reno. "Decorum befitting your station." It was an order.
Rudolph just frowned. Who were these people, and why was the redhead pitching such a fit?
M
"Fuck decorum, and right now I just need a damn smoke. . .I'll be outside."
The doctor appeared in the doorway. "Mr. Urar!" she exclaimed, jogging quickly over to his bedside. "You're awake!" She turned to Tseng. "When...?" she was so excited she couldn't put all her thoughts into words just yet. And to think, she'd been ready to come in and begin the discussions on long term care for the man.
Reno turned around as he was heading out "Five minutes ago. ..now if you'll excuse me a second"
"He's amnesiac at the moment, and his husband's just a shade upset."
Reno's ring flashes in the light from the doorway as he walks out, and Rude would note he wore an identical one. ..and likely wonder why.
The doctor frowned. "I'll be the judge of that." She walked around the bed and took Rude's vitals, then nodded towards Tseng. "If you'll give us a few moments, please."
Rudolph's frown deepened. Who were they to wear matching rings? Best friends? Certainly not... THAT...
Tseng notes the expression and nods. "Yes, that...but I suppose, the rest will come back in time."
Rudolph blinked a few times, then carefully slipped the ring from his finger, holding it up and inspecting it in the light.
Reno sat outside the main door, smoking a cigarette, leaning against the door, he knew he probably SHOULDN'T be smoking, but right now his heart was racing at an unhealthy clip for reasons that had nothing to do with nicotine.. .he held up his hand in a wave at the blond that passed by, only recognizing the hair color, but not sure which one it was. ..Elena and Rufus were the only two he knew with hair that color.
"Good to see you're back to your usual habits," Rufus said casually, flipping back his hair before he spoke.
"I'm not in the besta moods at the moment. ..fucking asshole Josh, sure as fuck hope someone caught him."
"Awake or dead?" Rufus asked, cutting right to the chase as his whole body stiffened, preparing for the worst.
"Awake. ..but amnesiac. ..an that ain't got me happy, either. .. shit. ..can't any of us catch a damn break?"
"Mr. Tarshill?" A quiet voice called from the door.
"Yeah, comin'. ." He crushed the butt out on the sidewalk, dragging the iv rack with him, shivering at a sudden breeze that blew underneath the robe as he strode in.
The doctor stood just inside the doorway. "I'm sure you'd like to hear my prognosis now as opposed to later, otherwise I wouldn't have bothered you," she said evenly.
"Shoot. ..and if it's hopeless, make it literal." My, wasn't he in a fatalistic mood?
"I thought you wanted me to have a little faith," she said, a little snappy with being snapped at. "Come with me," she added, leading them into an examination room. She put up a scan of Rude's brain. "This is Mr. Urar's brain at the time he was resucitated. Please note the black areas. Those areas, as far as we know, are associated with long term memory. Now," she put up another scan next to it. "This is the scan I just completed. Can you see how the black areas are slowly shrinking?" She turned to look at Reno. "He is in excellent physical condition, and I have reason to believe that, eventually, he will make a full recovery. However, this condition, retrograde amnesia, means that he is unable to access his memories of everything that happened prior to his waking up. Also, considering his response to you, Mr. Xian, I could be lead to believe he also has a touch of source amnesia, which means he still has access to his... skills as a Turk, he just isn't aware of how he got them."
Reno just sighed. ..everything. .all of ther relationship. ..the progress they'd made. ..gone. ..he leaned against the wall. .."Gotta start over. ..but will he even still want me. ..still want THIS. ..Gods, I just don't know."
"You won him over once..." the doctor said, taking down and filing the scans in the folder she held. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to finish scheduling a few tests for Mr. Urar. I want him under constant supervision for at least a few days, until we can determine his recovery rate."
Reno starts whistling a tune, then humming. ..the words whispered. ..just a snippet of a song he'd known a long time ago before heading back in, as painful as it was to do. ..to walk back in there to someone he loved so much that didn't remember him. ..didn't remember everything they'd shared.
Rudolph nodded in greeting to the redhead, then went back to the files spread out on his lap on the bed.
Elena stood from the chair she was sitting on and walked slowly towards Reno. "Doctor said I could give him his files. Might help."
"Yeah. .." He began humming the concerto he had written, not sure why, just idly humming. ..he raked his fingers through his hair, his hands still shaky.
Rudolph frowned. "I've heard that before." He wasn't sure where, he wasn't sure of anything else other than he'd heard that before.
"I wrote it.. .the morning after we moved into our new place. ..you gave me Hell about buying the piano I wrote it for, but you did buy it. . .I was so damn happy..."
"You must be very talented," Rudolph said softly.
"Mama was a pianist. .was.." he whispered that last part out. "Maybe...I'll take you to meet her one day."
He just nodded, unsure what else to do. "I'm sorry... I get the feeling we were really close... but... I can't remember your name."
"Reno.. and yeah. ..we are. ..very close." images of all of the times they'd made love danced through his head and he closed his eyes, silently cursing Josh again for the destruction of something so damn precious to him.
Rudolph frowned. "No, not Reno... Your name starts with... with a 'J'... Dammit, why can't I remember?"
"No, I'm not Josh. .." he cursed softly.
"Josh! Yeah, that's it!" There was a tiny smile at the corner of his lips... followed directly by a frown. "Your hair's longer, though."
Reno found the photos of his own years as Rude's partner in the records. ..showing him the photos. ..."Besides, Josh is crazier than me."
"You're better looking," he said, then instantly blushed, looking away. "I'm sorry... I didn't mean..."
"Hey, 'sokay. ..I don't mind a damn thing you say. ..we were..Hell, I remember our wedding. ..you had your jaw in the floor when you saw this" Is actually thanking God Elena took photos now. ..he shows him the photo of Rufus swallowing Tseng's face "I thought you were going to punch a hole in the floor with it."
He felt he could trust this redhead, this Reno, but he was finding it so hard to believe he would actually get married. He scooted a tiny bit away at the feel of Reno's hand on his thigh. "Sorry," he said, averting his eyes.
"I won't hurt you, yo. ..an' the visit to your folks. ..your little brother pissed me off so bad. ..I remember sticking my shock stick in his mouth an' your mom tanning my hide. ..that was some funny shit"
Then his robe shifted down. ..showing the beginning of the tattoo on his back, the blue ink less than a week old. ..color gotten the day they'd fought over Rennan. ..when he'd come back. ..damn, that had been fantastic. ..
"Momma," Rudolph said softly, touching the picture of the older woman whose smile could have lit a thousand rooms.
"Yeah. ..she made me feel so welcome. .." He shifts, and a bit more of that blue inking shows. ..images of Rude's skilled fingers dancing over it running across his brain. ..and his hands have to cross in front of his crotch. ..no, this was NOT the time for a damn hard on.
He paused, looking over at this Reno person a little strangely. "Do I... make you uncomfortable?" he asked bluntly.
M
"Nah. ..just. ..memories at the wrong time. .." and when he released his shielding, the tenting in the robe was obvious. "THIS is what you do ta me. ..an' parta why I love you so much. ..aside from the fact that you were always there when I needed someone to lean on. . .or kick my ass back inta gear when I got too down or keep me from bein' an idiot when all I wanted was ta hurt myself. ..I owe you my life a thousand times over, yo."
Rudolph's eyes widened as his face turned red as Reno's hair. "I do that?" he asked, voice small.
"That. ..and a hella lot more. . ." He turns his back for a moment, exposing the entire back section of the tattoo, hoping it would stir. ..something..
"Didn't that... hurt? A lot?" he asked softly, a single finger tracing the air just millimeters away from the redhead's skin.
"Yeah...but what you did. ..afterward. ..felt absolutely fantastic. ..besides. ..I'm a bita masochist, always have been."
"What..." he gulped. "... what did I do?"
"I'll show you when we're outta here." He grinned at that one, then waggled his eyes at Elena.
Rudolph's eyes were as wide as saucers as he slid just a little further away from the redhead.
"Reno..." Elena sighed as she smiled. "Give him some time. He probably needs it before you go molesting him in someone's office or something."
"Hey, I'm kiddin', sheesh. Besides, I'm married to him, I can molest him wherever I want. ...except the boss's desk, don't think Rufus-sama would like that much."
He didn't feel very married, but then again, he didn't feel really... anything. For any of those people. "Rufus... ShinRa?" he asked. He'd read about how he was employed by a ShinRa in his files.
"Yeah, the four of us an' him are all pretty tight knit...shit. ..who's been feeding Livewire while I've been in here?"
Elena raised her hand, showing a few of the shallow scratches left on her arm. "Your cat is a pain in the ass when he's hungry."
"Yeah. ..tell me about it." and he blushed slightly remembering how he'd gotten the cat.
Rudolph frowned. "Cat"
"Yeah, cuahl. .." and he slowly, haltingly, retold the night at Corneo's. ..all of it, holding nothing back. ..still hoping to trigger. ..something, some image, some memory. ..anything.
He shuddered, seeming to pull in on himself just a little. "Fire demon," he whispered, almost inaudibly.
"Yeah, Ifrit. ..see, you do remember a little. .."
Rudolph shook his head, quickly putting all the papers and whatnot back into the file folders. "No more. I've had enough."
Reno just nodded wincing a bit as he laid back in his own bed, the paling of his skin showing that he had overexerted himself a little. ..though he wasn't bleeding this time, fortunatly. ..he had simply exhausted himself.
Elena stood. "I'll leave you two to get some sleep." She turned towards Reno. "I'll wake you when Ms. Berry gets here."
"Thanks, yo. .." He settled in, his eyes closing. ..his dreams ones of he and Rude...then ones of Rude telling him he didn't know him. ..not to touch him. .the killing words. "I don't want to see you again. ..leave me be." outwardly there were little more than a few whimpers to tell of his fears coming out in his dreams as they usually did.
He didn't remember being such a light sleeper, but then again, Rudolph didn't remember much about himself at all. Everytime that Reno character would make a noise, he was instantly awake, staring across the room at the messy shock of red hair until the whimpering stopped.
Reno got up, heading for the shower. ..getting in, washing his hair, wanting to look somewhat presentable. . .again, it felt wrong. ..
There was a tiny knock at the bathroom door before a small "Reno?" came through it. Elena really didn't want to wake Rude back up.
"Yeah.. .m'comin' Laney. ..give me a sec."
"No, no," she said softly. "Just wanted to let you know, Ms. Berry called. She had to reschedule for tomorrow afternoon."
"gotcha. ..need another damn smoke. ..every time we start ta make some progress. .." his eyes showed his emotional exhastion.
"It's going to take time," she replied, brushing a stray piece of hair from near Reno's eye. "He wants to remember just as much as you want him to. We just have to be patient."
"You know I was never much for patience, Laney, that's HIS department. ." He just sighed, striding outside for another cigarette. ..he was so insanely soul-weary, he felt like he'd aged 20 years in the past one.
Elena stole one of the cigarettes from his pack, sitting down next to Reno on the curb as she lit it. "Well, he NEEDS you to have patience now." She paused to watch the smoke mingle with her chilled breath. It was getting a little chilly outside lately. Seasons must be changing. "Just remember, if you drive him away now, even if he does get his memories back, he'll resent you for pushing him away. Then where will you be?" she asked, knowing the redhead would answer the rhetorical question.
"Places I don't wanna go. .. shit. .I just. ..I want him back. ..want IT back how it was before this fucked up year started. .."
She glanced over at him. "This has been a fucked up year." She took a long drag from the cigarette before pausing to look at him again. "Isn't there something about this picture you find wrong?"
"What, besides, you and I sitting out here instead of HIM and I? and me in my fucking hospital gown looking like death not even warmed over but still fucking cold?"
Elena sighed, her hand absently trailing down to her abdomen as she held her cigarette closer to Reno's face. "Want to try again?"
"An' you shouldn't be smoking, bad for the baby." he chuckles softly." And then he realizes. .."No. ..shit. ..you mean. ..while I was. ..Gods, I'm so sorry, Laney. ..shows where my brain's been."
She just nodded, taking another drag from the cigarette. "Wednesday morning. Early morning. Terrible cramps, thought I was going to die, then the bleeding... Went to the hospital and... well..." She paused. "I haven't even told Sam yet."
"While I was still out cold after Josh's little temper tantrum. ..fuck. ..'nother thing I can lay on myself. .."
"Had nothing to do with you," she said quietly. "It was an..." she took a deep breath before continuing. "They called it an incomplete abortion. They had to open me up and get what was left of... it... out..."
"Still. .dammit, life can't cut us a fucking break. ..I know you wanted it, Laney. ."
"I did, but..." she finished the cigarette, reaching for another. "Maybe... this was the way it was supposed to be. I'm not... I'm not sure I'm ready to be a mother just yet." So long as she kept thinking of it as, well, an 'it', she wasn't going to tear up again. She'd spent most of the time Reno and Rude were unconscious in tears.
Reno's eyes misted now...grief for her. ..as well as for his own losses. ..but they fell silently. .."s-shit. .." he slapped his hand across his eyes, dashing them away. ."I just feel so damn tired. ..but. ..not the kind sleep cures. ..you know what I mean?"
"I do," she said, keeping her tone even and her face straight. "They... they said it had something to do with the Mako Sam received in SOLDIER..."
He drapes an arm over her shoulders before looking down. .noticing a few spotss of red on the gown. "Shit. .." he almost said "Rude's gonna kill me for reinjuring myself" but he bit it back. ..biting his bottom lip at that reminder of what was lost.
"How am I going to tell him?" she asked quietly. It had been the question she'd been asking herself since the procedure. She was too caught up in her own thoughts to say anything about Reno's.
"Just tell him the truth. .it's all you c'n do." The words were spoken in a tired tone. ..the spots becoming a fair sized stain, but he ignored it.
"He actually wanted this so bad once he found out," she said softly. "He's... I hope he doesn't think I did it on purpose..."
"He won't blame you, Laney."
She sighed, inhaling afterwards and squinting her nose. She looked around, then noticed the spot on Reno's garment. "You're bleeding," she said plainly.
He only nodded. ..before he toppled over, eyes rolling back.
Elena shot to her feet, calling Reno's name a few more times before she looked at that face, eyes staring in the complete wrong direction. She waved down one of the orderlies that happened to be walking by inside and got him to help her carry him inside.
Reno when he awakened noted it was dark. ..the clock read some insane hour he didn't even want to imagine, and he was hurting like a bitch. ..and he had restraints on his wrists. Now whose idea was this?
"You passed out," came a soft, familiar voice from across the room. "They asked me if they could restrain you. I didn't see a problem with it. You... were trying to hurt yourself."
"Maybe. ..sub-consciously I was. ..I'm just tired of life fucking me all the time. .."
"Can't be that bad..." came the voice again. "Least you remember what you did two weeks ago."
"That's what's bad. ..you've forgotten. .everything.. .everything I was to you. ..an.. .shit.. .it fuckin' hurts.. .I'd pay so much to be where you are right now. ..to NOT remember. ..except. ..I'd wanna remember you. .."
He could feel an anger start to bubble up inside him, but he pushed it down. Now wasn't the time to blow off the handle. He sighed, settling on a single question. "What... what do you call me? So many people call me so many things..." He'd been called 'Rudolph' when his mother called, and 'Rudy' when he talked to his brother Sam, and that blonde woman had called him 'Rude'. He knew they were all variations on the same name, but to know what this redhead that seemed to mean a lot to him in his past called him.
"I call you 'aibou'...partner. .love. ..sometimes baby when I'm in the mood for a tumble. ..but mostly...Rude or Rudy. .."
and he spoke the name "Rude" in that breathy tone that he reserved for when he was being loved. ..
"Rudy is too childish," he mumbled, the way the redhead said 'Rude' sending shivers up his spine for reasons he wasn't entirely sure of. "And I'm certainly no child..." he looked down at himself. "So... I guess most people call me Rude?" he asked, finally looking up at... Reno.
"Yeah. ..and you got one. ..who calls you papa Rude. ." he chuckled softly.
"I... I don't have a child." Of that, Rude was certain. It was one of the clear memories he actually could remember.