Chapter Twenty: What does it feel like?

The night before the wedding, Glinda and Elphaba stayed in the same guest room. It wasn't for lack of rooms, but Elphaba was jittery and needed company. "Tomorrow night at this time…"

"You'll still be at the reception." Glinda finished. "But later tomorrow night, you and Fiyero… I can't believe you're getting married and I still haven't kissed a boy!"

"Boq's staying in a room on the next floor," Elphaba said simply.

Glinda made a face. "When you get back, will you tell me all about your honeymoon?"

"Certain things. If you want to know about the food…"

"I want to know about a lot of things, Elphie. I mean, no one I know has ever had sex."

"That's private! Besides, what do you think you'll ever need to know? I don't know anything and tomorrow night, I'm going to be married."

"I wonder if it's worth it." Glinda said dreamily.

"If it's any bit as good as kissing, it should be." Elphaba smiled.

"You never told me what kissing was like," Glinda said, bouncing excitedly on the bed.

"Well, what kind of kissing?"

"Just plain, old, regular kissing."

"Well, it's really just pressure on your lips, Glinda. I don't know why it could feel like anything else."

"What about fireworks?"

"It's sweet, yes. I wouldn't call what you see 'fireworks' exactly, but it certainly makes your head spin. I was lucky we were sitting down the first time he kissed me because I think I might've fallen backwards a little if I'd been standing." Elphaba shrugged.

"Aw, that's so cute. I'll bet Fiyero would've caught you."

"If you ever tell him anything I say tonight, I will kill you," Elphaba threatened.

"I won't!" Glinda promised. "But tell me, what's it like when a boy French kisses you?"

"You really want to know?" Elphaba asked.

"Well, yeah."

"How do you know Fiyero has French kissed me?" Elphaba demanded

"You're getting married. I can only assume you've done several things." Glinda said.

"We haven't done anything that required the removal of any clothing," Elphaba informed her.

"That doesn't say much. I'll bet you guys make out all the time."

"What's your definition of making out?"

"French kissing when you're lying down." Glinda seemed proud of this definition.

"Well, that's really just kissing."

"What's it like?"

"It's nice." Elphaba would say no more.

"Come on, Elphie! Doesn't it feel gross when he puts his tongue in your mouth?"

"It's a little… wet. But it's not gross, Glinda. If you want to call that sort of kissing 'gross', think of what certain other things would be classified as. Sex would be absolutely disgusting. And I would hope it isn't." Elphaba began getting ready for bed. "I'm afraid I'll toss and turn all night, Glinda."

"Are you going to tell me if sex is disgusting, Elphie?"

"Maybe." She turned out the lights. "But I don't want you bothering me about it anymore. I'm so nervous I could about burst."

In the next room, Fiyero was nervously pacing. If he sat down to think, he'd begin imagining Elphaba, and thinking of her was not helping him get through the night at all. The pressure from both families was overwhelming. Elphaba's family had been nothing but cordial to him, but she'd whispered to him that Nessa had thrown a fit and her father would only speak to her if forced. His family, after having met Elphaba, had become more accepting, but didn't seem to enjoy Elphaba's family. He just wanted everyone to get along, and it seemed his family did, as well. As soon as Elphaba's father had walked into the room at the rehearsal, Fiyero's father had attempted to greet him with a pat on the back and a handshake. He'd said something like "don't worry, we know this routine." Elphaba's father, however, had not been very receptive.

There was a knock at the door and he hoped strongly that it was not Elphaba. As much as he loved her, hours before their union was not the time for him to kiss her. If he kissed her now, he feared he'd have his way with her and neither of them would be of any mind to stop it. He was more than grateful when his father peeked his head into the room. "Nervous?"

"Very," Fiyero nodded vigorously.

"About tomorrow?"

"About tomorrow night," Fiyero added honestly. "I mean, I have no doubts that I love her, so why should I be nervous about tomorrow? It's everything after the wedding that I'm worried about." The words escaped his mouth without second thought. He couldn't believe he was telling his father, of all people, the sort of thing he'd just said.

"That's what I came to talk to you about."

Fiyero looked at his father questioningly.

"Sit down."

Fiyero did. "What is it?"

"Tomorrow night, you're going to lead your new bride to bed and make love to her, and that's what anyone would do."

"Dad, do we need to talk about this?"

"Yes, because you think it's going to be the best experience of both of your lives, and you need to know, it won't be."

"What in Oz do you mean?" Fiyero shifted uncomfortably.

"It doesn't always feel good for a woman the first time, so you need to be gentle."

"What?"

"I remember having this conversation with my father. There's something in a woman that breaks when you… well, put yourself into her deep enough."

"Even if she wants it and is expecting it?"

"No matter what. No matter how good you think you can make her feel, it's going to be painful for her. She'll probably bleed a little. Just don't be alarmed, but be careful."

"I don't want to hurt Elphaba…" Fiyero said quietly.

"It'll only hurt the first few times, she'll be a little… well, unreceptive those times, so you've got to be extremely cautious when making love to her."

"Will she know it's going to hurt?"

"With most young women, her mother should have told her. But her mother isn't around to warn her and her father certainly doesn't seem to want to speak to her at all."

"There's no way to avoid it?"

"None." His father affirmed.

Fiyero sighed. "Dad, I think I'm scared."

Elphaba was almost asleep when Glinda sat up and said, "Elphie! One more thing."

"What?" Elphaba grumbled.

"I've heard that you, like, split, the first time. And that it's not any good."

"Thank you. This is just the paranoia I need the night before my wedding."

"But that's what the girls say. That's why none of them ever want to do it. Pfanee said her boyfriend tried to make her, but she refused because she knew it would hurt really bad."

"Are you serious?" Elphaba was now paying more than enough attention to Glinda's words.

"I'm pretty sure. But they said it's supposed to get better. They're just not willing to go through the pain to find out."

"That's nice. How long do they think they're going to go through pain before it feels good?"

"The first two or three times."

"Why didn't you tell me this before?"

"I forgot. I was so excited for you that it just slipped out of my head."

"Most things slip out of your head unnoticed, don't they?"