A/N: I am SOO sorry that this story has been neglected in the midst of all of this other stuff that I've had to get done. I love your reviews, they always make me happy. Thanks to RosalieLilianHale, stang710, skwerels, samjackship, CrystalClear444, skiergal, cinderella2122, and Carter91, all of my reviewers up to this point. You have no idea how much I appreciate it!!

And now, onto the much awaited installment. . .

Last Train to Clarksville

Previously. . . "Oh my god." Sam said. "It's fifth."

Chapter 4: (title)

"Awwww. . What the-" Jack started, annoyance plain in his voice.

"I am Typhoeus!" Fifth said, his eyes flashing. "Announce me as your god or be destroyed!"

"How is this possible?" Sam asked, perplexed. Fifth chuckled, his normal voice tainted with he goa'uld's obvious accent.

"How is this possible, you ask?" He said with a grin. "This fifth is more humanoid than you ever suspected." He said, grinning maniacally.

"How can the Goa'uld occupy a machine?" Teal'c asked, raising an eyebrow.

"It works quite well; in fact, I find many new, ahh, powers with this form." As he said this, he raised his arms, and the lights overhead sparked and then went out. There was a brilliant flash of light, and everyone was back on the Goa'uld ship.

"Jaffa! Crie!" Fifth ordered. Several jaffa grabbed SG-1 and Thor, and they were escorted out of the room, and into a holding cell that was equipped with a force shield that held them in.

Once the jaffa had left the room to guard the door, they had a chance to talk. "Ok, what are we going to do about this?" Jack asked. He looked at his team quizzically.

"We've got to get out of here." Said Daniel.

"Thank you for your helpful input, Danny, but I believe that was part of the plan." Sam glared at them both momentarily and then said, "Fifth can fiddle with technology around him, and make it do whatever he wants."

"How is that possible, Major Carter?" Teal'c asked.

"I'm not really sure, Teal'c," she said. "My guess is that the Goa'uld is merely accessing a power that the Replicators already had, they just couldn't yield it." Jack gave her a funny stare.

"So, all of the bugs can do that to technology?" he asked.

"It's merely a theory, sir." She said.

"We need to find a way out of our predicament." Thor said.

Daniel peered out the window on the other side of the cell and said, "We can't be that far away from a planet with a gate. Let's wait until we get off the ship, and escape then."

As if on queue, several jaffa walked into the cell and grabbed them forcibly. They were led to the bridge, where Fifth was standing at the control panel. He turned around slowly.

"Bow before me, your god!" he pronounced, looking down at them.

Jack showed an exasperated expression. "Look, I already told one of your jaffa minions, I have this bad knee, makes bending down a real pain in the-" The sound of a zat being fired sounded, and Jack fell to the floor in an unconscious heap. The entire team went to see if he was okay, but they were held back by the jaffa.

"I said kneel!" Fifth commanded, and the jaffa pushed the rest of the team down, hard. Thor let out a sound that resembled resentment.

"We will be arriving at your home world, soon" He said with an evil grin. He looked to the Jaffa. "Take them away, but leave their leader and the woman." He commanded. They obeyed. Fifth looked to the jaffa holding Sam. "Wait outside." he said, and the jaffa left the room.

"Well, Samantha, it seems that my host has the most peculiar feelings about you." He said, walking towards her slowly. She looked apprehensive. "A mixture of sincerest love and bitter despise brew inside him at this very moment. The urge to end your life," he clutched her throat tightly, "balanced with an equal urge to kiss you right here." He took his hand off her neck and moved to stroke her cheek. Sam drew back.

"Stay away from me." She spat. Fifth showed an expression of sarcastic hurt.

"Why, no, Samantha, you are the key to everything. It is with your knowledge that I shall enslave your Earth, you at my side as my queen!" Sam showed a look so disgusted that the expression, 'if looks could kill' took on a whole new meaning.

"What's this about enslaving the Earth again?" Jack asked groggily. Sam rushed to his side and took his hand to help him up.

"Thank you Carter." He said.

"Not a problem, sir." she said.

"Silence!" Fifth roared. "Samantha, you will assist me, or all of your friends shall perish, starting with this one!" He motioned towards Jack.

"Hey, whoa there, buddy. Let's not get excited." Jack said. Fifth grabbed the Goa'uld pain stick off of a nearby table. He flung it against Jack's chest.

"AHHH!" Jack cried. His eyes and mouth emitted a golden light as he writhed against the torture device, screaming in agony.

"Stop it!" Sam screamed. "Fifth! Stop it right now!" He smiled a snide smile and lifted the device off of Jack's chest. Sam instantly grabbed his shoulder and helped him steady himself.

"Will you help me now, or will your friend have to suffer more?" He asked.

"She's not gonna help you a damn bit." Jack said. Fifth smacked him.

"We'll see about that." he said. Just then, lots of loud crashing and banging noises came from outside the door. The door opened, and there was Teal'c, Thor, and Daniel all battling jaffa. Sam and Jack instantly reacted, Jack taking the pain stick from Fifth, and Sam running to help Daniel, Teal'c, and Thor.

Jack grabbed Fifth, keeping the stick within inches of Fifth's throat. Once the hall was cleared of conscious jaffa, the rest of the team came inside.

"Now what do we do?" Asked Daniel, looking from Jack to Fifth.

Fifth's eyes lit up. "Now, we be destroyed." He said, and there was a brilliant flash of light and a deafening crash as the ship they were in, as well as all of its inhabitants, was blasted to smithereens.

1010101010

A/N: So. . . what do you think? No flames, please! Oh, and the 'cell' I referred to, think of it like the one featured in the episode "The Other Guys." Tell me what you all think, and I'm sorry that it took so long, and that this chapter is kind of short!