Madam Narcissa Malfoy: haha I know what you mean about Severus being a greasy git, and he still is! Just not to Hermione, he has a soft spot for her. She is the only person he has ever loved.
Hermione opened her eyes sleepily. The sunlight was piercing and she quickly closed them again. She felt very groggy and disoriented. She could only vaguely remember yesterday, small patches of light in her dark mind. She did remember one thing though, she remembered Severus Snape and how he had told her she was safe and put his strong arms around her in a gentle way. This seemed odd to her, the Snape she could remember would never comfort her like that. He only had cruel, harsh words for her. She made an attempt to open her eyes again and found the sunlight less blinding than before. She looked around and realized she was at Hogwarts in the hospital wing; the memories from yesterday were flooding back to her now.
Madame Pomfrey heard Hermione moving and slowly pushed aside the curtains that were erected yesterday for her privacy. Hermione saw the curtains moving and immediately recoiled in fear, memories of Lucius and her abuse swimming in her mind. She sighed in relief as she saw Madame Pomfrey.
"Good morning Hermione" She said. "I trust you had a good nights sleep? We gave you some sleeping draught to help you."
Hermione nodded vaguely remembering taking some. Hermione logical side knew she was safe at Hogwarts with Dumbledore, but the other side of her, the side that Lucius haunted told her that she was never safe, that he would come after her and to trust no one again. As Madame Pomfrey full pulled the curtains down Hermione jumped. In the chair beside her bed was none other than Severus Snape, dead asleep. Her immediate reaction was that any man would immediately equal harm. She slid further down her bed and eyed him suspiciously.
Madame Pomfrey saw her reaction.
"Oh, don't worry Hermione" She said. "He means you no harm. He hasn't left your bedside since you came here you know. You were in a coma for nine days due to the abuses you suffered." She smiled disapprovingly at Severus' sleeping form. "I see he has finally worn himself out."
Hermione took in this information with confusion. She still had no idea why he would do that for her. She thought he hated her? But still, she remembered his kind words from yesterday, how he had told her that he would always keep her safe, no matter what. She didn't know how any one could care for her now. She felt dirty and worthless. Every time she blinked she thought she saw Lucius looming over her, his hands running along her, thrusting himself into her virgin body…she shivered at the thought. Tears started to well in her eyes again. She quickly brushed them away, not wanting Madame Pomfrey to fret.
Suddenly she heard a sleepy yawn from beside her and saw that Severus had awoken, he looked around sleepily and gasped when he saw Hermione was awake.
"Hermione." He whispered "How are you?"
"Fine." She muttered meekly, keeping her eyes downcast.
He stepped over and placed his hand on her shoulder. She immediately shrank away from him.
"Don't touch me!" She screamed in sudden terror.
Severus quickly withdrew his hand but she saw the hurt and regret across his face.
"Sorry, it's just that…" She whispered.
"There is no need to apologize to me Hermione." Severus said kindly.
She nodded her head and then turned her gaze away from him to stare out of the window.
"What am I going to do Professor?" She asked him a lost look in her eyes. "I can't go back to my classes…I just cant. What will I do about resuming my school year? But I am just not ready yet..." Her voice trailed away weakly.
"Don't worry about it Hermione" He said. She registered for the first time that he was using her first name, he had never called her that before. It was always "Granger" or "Know-it-all" before then. He continued with "I have arranged with the Headmaster to have you stay with me in my chambers. Oh don't worry he said (for her eyes had grown wide at the thought of sharing a bedroom with him) you will not share the same room with me. I have two rooms down in my dungeons, one that is adjacent to mine that I am sure you will find quite comfortable. And about your schooling, I believe I could take on the task as your tutor. My specialty is potions of course but I am also well trained in DADA, Charms, Transfiguration, etc.
"That's very kind of you Professor Snape" She said with a small smile. "I think I would like the time to recuperate. To forget.."
So far she had mentioned nothing of her rape or anything that had happened to Severus or anyone. He was not going to ask her either, when she was ready she would tell him, but now apparently was not the time. She was suppressing those memories but he could see it in her eyes how they were haunting her. She seemed on edge all the time, jumping at everything. Terror seemed to fill her face at random moments, and then she would close her eyes and breathe deeply and it would slowly fade away. He guessed she was being besieged by memories of Lucius at those moments he thought angrily. Oh, how he would love to tear that bastard from limb to limb, to watch as he was tortured out of existence. At least he had the satisfaction of knowing that Lucius was probably facing life in Azkaban for this one. It was now October 16 and Lucius' trial date was set for November 2. Like Dumbledore had said, his money couldn't save him this time.
"Would you like some breakfast?" He asked. "You must be starving. I can get you anything you like."
Hermione smiled at him. He had helped her so much in so short a time. Again she wondered why? Why did he want to help her? Why would anyone? Now that she was tainted by Lucius' touch. "No thank you Professor Snape. I would just like some coffee please."
"Very well." He said. "He was not happy with her choice to not eat. He went to his potions cabinet and got out something that he was quite good at making. It was called "Restituo" which meant to restore. It contained everything essential to the human body. He cursed himself for not thinking of giving this to her sooner. He went down to the Great Hall as they were still serving breakfast and grabbed some coffee. He quickly added the Restituo potion along with the cream and sugar to her coffee. He decided to grab her some toast with strawberry jam as well. He could at least try to coax her to eat.
As he was walking back to the hospital wing he was confronted by the two Golden Boys. Harry Potter and Ron Weasly.
"We want to know how Hermione is." Said Harry. "We are her best friends and deserve to know. No one tells us anything around here."
"Yeah." Said Ron somewhat lamely. "We have a right."
Severus groaned impatiently and snapped. "She has just awoken and is very delicate at the moment. She is in no condition to be bombarded by visitors."
"Bombarded?" Said Ron indignantly. "Hermione would want to see us."
"That may be, but until Madame Pomfrey and myself decide she is ready. You are to stay away." Said Severus angrily as he stalked away without a backward glance.
"Who are you to decide!?" Harry yelled angrily at Snape's retreating back.
"Git.." Muttered Ron.
Harry sighed "Don't worry mate, we'll see her soon enough."
When Severus arrived back at the hospital wing he was again shocked at just how weak she looked. Her skin did seem to have gained back some of its color and she was no longer covered in bruises and cuts, but she was still incredibly thin and frail. He knocked on the edge of the door to the infirmary to make she he didn't startle her too badly. She jumped but then seemed to calm when she saw it was only him. He handed her coffee and pretty much demanded that she eat the toast. She quietly conceded and munched daintily at it. As she drank the coffee, her cheeks seemed to take on a rosier hue and her eyes looked livelier.
"Thank you so much Professor Snape." She said. "I feel better already. I am already sick of this hospital wing. It's dreary and depressing, I always did hate hospitals. It's the smell that gets too me. They smell so sterile and sharp. I hate it."
"We will get you out of here as soon as possible." Severus said. He didn't really want to ask it but he felt he ought to, as Ron and Harry were supposedly her best friends. He snorted at the though. Neither of them was good enough for her presence. "Harry and Ron asked me in the Great Hall, well rather shouted at me, they would like to know if it is alright to come and visit you. They seem to be rather distressed about you."
Hermione bit her lip uncertainly. She had thought about Ron and Harry and she missed them a lot. She just didn't know if she had the energy for visitors, but her breakfast had revived and she did want to see them. She smiled at the thought of their faces. "Yes I actually do want to see them please. Could they come now?"
This was not the answer he wanted to hear. "Very well" was all he said and walked away quickly. Hermione couldn't help but notice that he seemed less than happy about her seeing them, but then she remembered how much he hated Harry and Ron. Yes, that must be the reason, she mused.
Five minutes later Harry and Ron came rushing into the hospital wing.
"Hermione!" Harry shouted running over and hugging her. She tensed at first but then remembered it was Harry, and Harry could never harm her. She embraced him happily, brushing happy tears from her eyes at the sight of her friends. This was the first time seeing them in four months.
"Oh I missed you guys so much. Ron, come here!" She said playfully and embraced him as well.
Severus watched from the sidelines at the happy reunion, they chatted and laughed. She seemed almost completely at ease around them, but there were still those moments when, if someone spoke too loudly or made a sudden movement, she would tense and fear would shine in her eyes again. He felt suddenly jealous at her relationship with them, he wished she could care for him that way. As he thought this, his old feelings of bitter anger surfaced. She will never care for you, you fool he though savagely. She is repulsed by you, the only reason she stands your presence is out of pity.
Suddenly Ron, completely foolish and tactless as he always was asked her " Hey Hermione, why were you gone so long, what did Lucius do to you?"
She flinched violently as if she had been whipped and immediately withdrew within herself drawing her knees up to her chest. Ron looked completely nonplussed but Harry looked at him angrily.
"Fool." Severus whispered to Ron. "Both of you, leave now."
Harry said awkwardly. "I'm sorry about that Hermione, we'll come visit you again soon."
"Yeah, bye Hermione" Said Ron looking very uncomfortable.
Hermione just nodded numbly. At the simple mention of Lucius' name all of the memories of the past had hit her like a waterfall, leaving her breathless and struggling for air.
"Hermione? Are you alright? Can I get you anything?" Severus said.
She looked at him and he was saddened to see that her eyes looked so haunted. "No thank you Severus, I would just like to get out of this hospital wing." She struggled to give him the smallest of smiles."
"I will see to that, I just have to get Madame Pomfrey's permission. She has to give you one last inspection to make sure you are ready." Severus said kindly. "I have already gotten the house elves to get the second room ready for your stay, I also contacted your parents this morning and they have had all your clothes and things sent over. I arranged to have them sent to your new room."
"Thank you Professor Snape." She said.
Severus noted how she called him "Professor". For some reason this saddened him, he guessed it was because every time she said it, it made him realize that there relationship was nothing more than that of a teacher to a student. There was an unbridgeable gap between them. It crushed him to think that it might always remain like that. Well he though, I better go get Madame Pomfrey.
He found the mediwitch in her office looking through stacks of papers on all her sick students. She jumped when he addressed her.
"Oh Severus you scared me" She said. "I was just looking through all this paperwork."
Severus explained about Hermione. Madame Pomfrey pursed her lips.
"Well Severus I don't know about that. I don't know if she is ready to leave just yet. She needs care, and love—
Severus cut her off and said sharply "That may well be Poppy but she wants to leave, she says she finds your hospital wing depressing." He finished triumphantly.
Madame Pomfrey bristled at the statement but said "Very well I shall check over her and see if she is fit to be released." She didn't look one bit happy about this.
Severus followed Madame Pomfrey into the hospital which didn't take long, considering her office was right beside it. Madame Pomfrey could never be far from her infirmary.
"Well Hermione Severus said you are ready to leave?" Said Madame Pomfrey, though no unkindly.
"Yes, Madame Pomfrey. I think I just need some fresh air." She said rather guiltily.
"Well don't we all sometimes." Said Madame Pomfrey. "Let's see how you are then?"
She told Severus to step outside as she looked over Hermione. She needed Hermione to take off her gown to do a full check up. Hermione was very apprehensive and tense throughout the whole ordeal. Exposing herself to someone brought back memories of her countless rapes. She closed her eyes tightly and tried to stop the crushing weight of the horrific memories before they overwhelmed her, she didn't want to come undone in front of Madame Pomfrey. She took deep calming breaths and told herself over and over that she was overreacting and that she would be fine. Madame Pomfrey seemed to realize her dilemma though and talked to Hermione the whole time, being very gentle and telling her it was alright. She performed countless spells on Hermione, most that Hermione hadn't heard of before. Hermione's thirst for knowledge was one thing that she hadn't lost through her ordeal. Hermione's mind immediately cataloged all the spells in her memory and was anxious to look them up later, she hated being ignorant of things.
Hermione sighed in relief when Madame Pomfrey told her it was over. She gratefully snatched up her nightgown and slipped it back, just this simple thing was very comforting. Once Hermione was all covered up, Madame Pomfrey slid back the curtain to reveal a very Severus.
"It appears everything is in order." Said Madame Pomfrey though she still looked rather disapproving. "Though if it were up to me I would keep her a few more nights…" She trailed off rather delicately.
"As it is not up to you Poppy, it seems she shall be leaving." Said Severus sarcastically. "Come Hermione I shall take you to your new bedroom so you can get adjusted. Don't worry about people in the halls, everyone is in class. But just to be sure you are not bothered I shall cast a disillusionment charm upon you."
Hermione's eyes had twinkled at Severus' remark to Madame Pomfrey. She knew the bitter old Professor was still in there somewhere and it had finally showed itself. "Okay Professor Snape." Hermione said. "I want to thank you again for your kindness to me, I don't know what I would do without you."
Hermione blushed as she said the last statement. She didn't quite know where that came from but she knew it was true. His presence made her feel safe and she trusted him. Whenever he left her side is when she felt uneasy. The shadows seemed to grow darker and her memories of the past sharper when his steady stature was missing.
Severus was also greatly surprised at her last comment, but very pleased as well. He was glad to know that she at least cared for him in some way, even if they could never be the way he wanted. Yet, her comment had left a small bubble of hope inside of him. If she cared for him as a friend now, then maybe it could someday be more.
Author's Notes: Please comment this story. I want to know what you guys think:)