Chapter 21 – Removing Your Boxers

A/N: First off, at the end of the last chapter, I meant for it to be that Naruto was saying what he said after leaving Anko and was jumping around the place on his own. Haha, I guess it didn't quite turn out that way, sorry about that!

Moving on, since I was planning on going on a month-long hiatus, and I've also received plenty of requests, I toiled away for hours on end to totally finish this chapter. It's in fact the longest chapter to date, I think. While not funny all over, I think you'll all be satisfied with what I've led it to, if not incredibly frustrated when you realize I won't be writing for another month because of exams (check my profile for the full story). So I hope you guys are still willing to wait on me, and I hope I won't disappoint you! Anyway, enjoy!

Naruto had quickly changed into Boxer-sama in some shrubbery, which included using colored contact lenses that Jiraiya had given him to be on the safe side. The meeting place was a fairly well known inn in Konoha. As he stepped into the lobby, he saw that the girls had already arrived, and were looking incredibly anxious. Their faces showed signs of relief as they saw Boxer-sama jog over to them, panting softly.

"Sorry about being late, I lost track of time…"

"We're just glad you made it, Boxer-sama!" the girls replied as they greeted him enthusiastically. Boxer-sama noticed Hinata behind them, obviously reluctant to be a part in the large date. He guessed that she was forced into it.

"Ah, you're here, Boxer-sama." Tsunade was making her way down the inn stairs with an irritated face. "I can't believe I have to do this… It's too early for this annoying stuff… I could be with Naruto just having fun but instead…" she mumbled. "Okay, Boxer-sama. Time for you to take these girls out for a date."

"R-Right!" Boxer-sama said nervously. "Um… How does this work?"

"We decided the best thing to do would be to split up the times for all the girls so they could each have an equal amount of time with you. Do you need to be introduced to them?"

"N-No, I know their names already."

"Good, then this won't take as long, then. Okay, it's just past midnight, and the entire day is going to be used for these girls. That's twenty-four hours, okay?"

'Ugh, this is going to be tough…'

"And we have six girls here. That's four hours each, and they're allowed to use these four hours in any way they want – that is, they don't have to spend the whole four hours right away."

"O-Okay."

"And don't forget what the deal was, Boxer-sama. You have to do whatever they ask. No exceptions, got it?"

Boxer-sama gulped at the sound of 'whatever they ask'. "Uh… O-Of course."

Tsunade sighed deeply, then turned to the girls. "Okay, who wants to go first?"

"Where the hell are those two?" Shikamaru was tapping his foot impatiently, dark bags under his eyes from lack of sleep. The boys, including Chouji, Shino, Neji, Kiba, Lee, and Shikamaru, were anxiously waiting for Naruto and Sasuke. Gaara had refused them, saying that it was a waste of his time.

"It doesn't appear as though they are coming, Shikamaru-kun," Neji said bluntly. "And in Sasuke's case, we haven't had the chance to tell him to meet us yet."

"We shouldn't have to tell them! They should feel the FIRE BURNING IN THIS SPOT and come RUNNING WITH PASSION!"

Lee's spontaneous outburst woke up the sleeping Chouji, who mumbled incoherently before drooping back to sleep.

"… It'd be good to get all the help we can…" Shikamaru's eyes narrowed. "It matters not. Boxer-sama will be OWNED by ME!"

The others looked at him in confusion.

"…Owned?"

Boxer-sama and Temari were alone, walking through the midnight streets of Konoha. Temari had managed to gain first dibs on Boxer-sama, and was hoping that by impressing Boxer-sama, he would decide to spend the day only with her.

"S-So Temari…" Boxer-sama stuttered nervously. "What should we do?" It was late, and Boxer-sama assumed that no places would be open just yet.

Without warning, Temari eased herself onto Boxer-sama's side, rubbing her cheek against his playfully. "Anywhere is fine, Boxer-sama!"

"What the hell are you-?"

Boxer-sama and Temari turned around with dumbfounded looks, wondering where the sound had come from. "Did you… just hear someone screaming?" Boxer-sama asked.

"I'm not sure… I heard something… Oh well, forget it!" she replied, leaning onto him once more.

In some nearby bushes, Tenten and Ino were restraining Sakura, shuffling about as she struggled relentlessly. "Calm down Sakura! We're not even meant to be following them like this, remember?" Tenten hurriedly warned.

"Buh dey're ge-in chu crose!" "But they're getting too close!" Sakura complained through Ino's hand.

"Look, just calm down! None of us want to see her get close to him either!" Ino said. She looked up again at where Boxer-sama and Temari were. "Ah mou! We're going to lose them!"

Kyuu was observing Boxer-sama quietly with the girls, a knowing smile on her lips as she licked them playfully. "I wonder…" she pondered to herself. "… What would these girls say if they knew… Huhu…"

"Knew what?"

Hinata, who wasn't as distracted as the others were, had overheard Kyuu. "What would we say if we knew what?"

Kyuu looked at Hinata, and smiled.

"You already know. How observant of you… Yet you're so unsure… How cute!"

"…K-Know what?"

Kyuu didn't reply. She nodded behind Hinata towards the other girls. "We should continue, or we'll be left behind."

Hinata turned to see the others moving on, and with one final uncertain glance at Kyuu, continued to follow the others.

"They seem to have stopped here in the park…"

Shikamaru and the boys were sitting on tree branches, observing Boxer-sama and Temari below, who were sitting on a bench in a park. They had been spending their time wandering around the moonlit village, and the boys had tailed them, patiently waiting for the chance to strike.

"Are you sure you're happy just doing this?" Boxer-sama asked again.

"It's really fine!" Temari replied heartily. "Just being with you brings me a lot of happiness!" Boxer-sama blushed madly underneath his disguise, playing with his fingers.

Again without warning, Temari lay her head on Boxer-sama's shoulder, startling him. "Let's just stay like this for awhile…"

'OhGodOhGodOhGodOhGodOhGodOhGod…' Boxer-sama repeated in his head, looking away in embarrassment. Temari would occasionally cuddle against him, causing Boxer-sama to shiver in surprise.

'Okay, now I just keep up this cute act, and he'll fall for me before he sees the other girls! Temari, you dog!' Temari giggled as she thought this, cuddling against Boxer-sama even more.

Shikamaru observed with an annoyed face, taking a deep breath. "Okay everyone, time to initiate Plan A. Everybody remember the jutsu I showed you?"

Everyone nodded, raising their hands to ready the seals.

"Okay… Time to utilize Take-Control-Of-One-Body-Part no Jutsu!"

All the boys began forming seals, and as they finished, they aimed their hands in the direction of Boxer-sama.

"Huh?" Boxer-sama felt his body tense, and it began to move on its own.

"B-Boxer-sama!" Temari found herself lying on the bench, Boxer-sama crawling on top of her with a firm grip on her wrist. "T-This is so sudden!"

"I want to have you." Boxer-sama found his mouth moving against his will, forming words without his consent. "Tell me you want me to have you."

"B-Boxer-sama…" Temari looked up at him with an almost frightened look.

"Heheh…" Shikamaru chuckled evilly. "Now Temari will see what a jerk Boxer-sama is, and tell all the girls to hate him! Yes, I'm so clever!"

"Are you sure this'll work, Shikamaru?" Neji asked uncertainly.

"My research on the girls tells me there's nothing they hate more than a pervert. So with this, Victory is ensured!"

"Say it." Boxer-sama's head moved close to Temari's neck, blowing on her ear lightly, causing her to moan softly.

'Victory is mine, Boxer-sama…' Shikamaru thought to himself with a grin.

"… Have me, Boxer-sama!" she exclaimed passionately, throwing her arms around him. "I'm all yours! Just be gentle with me!"

"…" Boxer-sama said nothing, only gaping at her with a defeated look.

"…" Shikamaru said nothing, only gaping at her with a defeated look.

Boxer-sama felt his movements suddenly freed, the distraught boys losing their focus and releasing him. He quickly threw himself off her, his heart pounding out of his chest.

"B-Boxer-sama?"

"T-Temari… I… Uh… That was…"

Before he could continue, the other girls had run onto the scene, their faces flushed from watching Boxer-sama and Temari almost get intimate.

"I-It's time to switch!"

The boys now sat on a rooftop, thinking of their next move.

"What do we do now, Shikamaru?" Neji asked in frustration.

"It's not over yet!" Shikamaru said, watching as Boxer-sama was led by Tenten's excited hand outside the village gates. "I've still got a good plan, and this time, Boxer-sama will not be so lucky!"

"Hey, Shikamaru…" Chouji was tugging on Shikamaru's sleeve, and he pointed towards another rooftop, where three people were crouched down suspiciously, much like they were.

"What the…? Who are those people? Quick, guys! Hide! They could be with Boxer-sama!"

As they hurriedly ran off, Shikamaru clicked his tongue impatiently. "Dammit, I guess we'll have to delay our plans on Boxer-sama for now," he whispered to himself. "But we still have until midnight… I will destroy that perverted freak!"

"Where exactly are you taking me, Tenten?" Boxer-sama called out, as Tenten haphazardly dragged him behind her through the trees and bushes.

"There's a place I want to show you!" she said excitedly with a grin. "It's a special place that only I know about!"

As Tenten relentlessly dragged him, Boxer-sama found himself whipped by every branch along the way. And running around wearing nothing but boxers led to numerous painful cuts and such all over his body.

'Man, if I knew that this costume would be used so often, I should have gone for something warmer… Hmm… Pants-and-jumper-sama?'

After a good hour of unpredicted S&M, Tenten finally began to slow down, finally letting go of a beaten-up Boxer-sama. "S-So…" Boxer-sama said, panting as he gripped his knees. "W-What was it… You wanted to show me, Tenten?"

"This! Look!"

Boxer-sama looked up, and gasped. In front of him was a beautiful beach, complete with palm trees and the everlasting view of the ocean. In the horizon, the morning sun was beginning to rise, burning a strong orange hue.

"I purposely picked this time slot so I could show you this place, Boxer-sama!" she said with a grin. "I used to play here as a kid. I've never shown this place to anyone yet!"

"Wow… It's a great view, isn't it?"

Tenten looked at Boxer-sama, then scratched her cheek with an unsure look. "Is something wrong, Tenten?"

"Hehe… Actually, it'll sound kind of silly, since we're sort of on a date and all, but actually…"

"You don't have to hold back. Today, I can only do whatever you say, remember?"

"Well… If this were happening a few weeks ago, I'd be incredibly excited… Not that I'm not excited now! It's just… There's somebody else I actually wanted to show this place to… And to tell the truth, I began to realize you kind of reminded me of him."

"Really? You must mean Neji, right?"

"… No, it's someone else… Do you know a person called Na-"

"BOXER-SAMA!"

Boxer-sama jumped, and turned around to see three ninjas, posing in a strange Power Ranger-esque manner, all wearing cloths to disguise their faces. But that wasn't what surprised Boxer-sama the most, and when he noticed this, he hurriedly covered Tenten's eyes before she could see. The first of them was tall, with gills lining his chest and neck, and wearing nothing but what seemed to be an uncomfortably tight G-string. He was grabbing at his crotch with a look of shame and defeat, obviously not happy to be there. The second was about Boxer-sama's height, wearing nothing but trunks style briefs, and was staring at Boxer-sama harshly. The third was the one that completely caught Boxer-sama off guard. He was…

"YOU'RE NAKED!" Boxer-sama yelled in disgust, pointing at the third stranger.

"Correct, Boxer-sama. Allow me to introduce us to you. This here in the stylish G-string for males, suited to people who enjoy the security and the freedom of the gluts, is G Ranger. Here, wearing the knit, form-fitting briefs for security and thigh warmth is B Ranger. And I, 'going commando', preferred to by nudists and people who enjoy the swinging effect, am N Ranger. And together!"

"We!" B Ranger yelled, switching to a new pose.

"…Are…" G Ranger followed reluctantly, only striking the pose after receiving two death stares from the other two.

"TEAM GBN!"

"… Team Gibun?" (They're not really saying the letters, the three Rangers are actually saying it as a word.)

"No, it's GBN!"

"… Geebin? Jeez, whatever! What do you want, team Gibbin?"

"We are here for ONE reason, and ONE reason alone! TO DEFEAT BOXER-SAMA! And we'll take your boxers as proof of our victory!"

"Damn perverts! As if I'll let you take my underwear!" Boxer-sama tried to get into a combat stance, but remembered he was still shielding Tenten's eyes. "Uh… Crap! Can't you just put something on? Please!"

"Never! N Ranger is a true commando!"

"B-But…! It's… It's just… Hanging…" Boxer-sama looked down accidentally, and felt like he was gonna barf. "Oh God! Couldn't you be like P Ranger instead and put some pants on or something?"

"Boxer-sama, what's going on?" Tenten hadn't really been paying attention due to the surprise grip on her eyes from Boxer-sama. "Who are the other people here? Why won't you let me see?"

"Because… Because… Oh, crap!"

Boxer-sama, not knowing what else to do, grabbed Tenten, still covering her eyes with one hand, and tried to escape.

"You won't get away! After him, Team GBN!"

"Stop calling us that, dammit! And for God's sake, let's all get some damn pants on! This is so illogical!"

"You have a lot of spirit, Kisame. I like that." N Ranger replied.

"Somebody, anybody, just kill me now. Please."

"Mou, how could we lose Boxer-sama like that!" Temari complained loudly. The girls found themselves in the village outskirts, having lost Tenten's track.

"Well, I guess we can't do much now but wait until their time's up," Sakura said with a sigh.

Hinata was much quieter than usual (if that's even a possible thing). What Kyuu had said to her was still inkling in her head.

"Is something wrong, Hinata?" Ino, sitting next to her, put her hand on her shoulder. "You look like something's bothering you."

The other girls looked at her curiously, except for Kyuu, who was sitting on a tree branch with a knowing smirk.

"Well… I've been wondering… About Boxer-sama's true identity."

"Eh? So Hinata, who normally acts like she doesn't like Boxer-sama, is actually a big fan?" Ino said teasingly, nudging her ribs.

"N-No, it's not that… I don't really like Boxer-sama that much, but he seems like a good person… But that's what bothers me…"

"Well, since we're just going to be sitting around here for awhile, how about we try working out who Boxer-sama is, then?" Sakura suggested. "I'm sure if we pool our information and ideas we can work out who he really is!"

"You're right, Sakura. You could easily find out who it is." Kyuu looked down at them from her branch with a smile. "But the question remains: do you really want to know who it is?"

The other girls looked at her in confusion. "Well, of course we want to know who it is! It's obviously someone strong, brave, and very handsome!" Temari replied confidently.

"How do you know he's handsome?" Hinata asked curiously.

"Because he's Boxer-sama!"

"O-Oh…" Hinata replied with a weak smile.

"Well, anyway, here's what I know…" Sakura began, scratching her chin as she recalled her previous meetings with him. "Well, from his body, we can assume he's around our age. His eyes are red, and he also knows all of our names. Which is weird, since I don't really know any ninjas in Konoha that have red eyes…"

"His voice is really deep and rugged, too…" Ino added. "And I can't think of anyone our age with a voice like that."

"Well, I know he makes a good pillow!" Temari said, reminiscing about her life-sized Boxer-sama pillow.

"What do you know about Boxer-sama, Hinata?"

"W-Well… Whenever I saw him, I had the strongest feeling that I knew him… No, I'm certain… Whoever Boxer-sama is, it's somebody that is always with us."

"Hmm… Well, if Hinata's right, then we just have to think about the boys who are always with us, right?"

"So that would be… Neji, Shikamaru, Chouji, Sasuke, Lee, Shino… Should we include Gaara?"

"Um, excuse me…" Hinata said quietly.

"I guess we could, but none of them seem to match the description…" Sakura said with a shrug.

"Y-You forgot about… Naru…"

"Well, it's possible one of them is using a Jutsu to change their eyes, isn't it? I'm sure there's a Jutsu for that…" Temari added.

"You're forgetting-"

"You guys forgot to add Naruto to that list!"

To Hinata's surprise, Ino had spoken up, informing them that they hadn't mentioned Naruto.

"Oh yeah! Naruto should be on that list too, I suppose…" Sakura thought back to their midnight practice sessions before the play, and smiled shyly.

"Naruto? Ugh, he's the last person I'd expect to be Boxer-sama," Temari said with a huff.

"He is, isn't he?" Kyuu said to herself with a giggle, playing with a fruit she picked off her tree.

"But it could still be him, couldn't it?" Ino said with a grin. "Besides, if you really think about it, there are a couple of similarities. For example, Boxer-sama uses Kage Bunshin, much like Naruto can."

"W-Well, I guess that's true…" Temari said. "But we all know that Naruto's just not that strong… Is he?"

"Well, I wouldn't call him a genius, that's for sure…" Ino and Sakura said simultaneously.

"But he has won some tough battles now and then," Sakura commented.

"Okay… So in other words… we gathered all our information, and the closest guess we can come up with is…"

Before their conversation could continue, they heard something heading towards them fast. It was a loud yelling, which they saw to be coming from Boxer-sama, cradling Tenten in one arm while shielding her eyes.

"Boxer-sama?"

"Everyone! Run back to the village, now! And don't any of you dare look back! Move!"

As he sounded so serious, they quickly did as they were told, dashing towards the village. Boxer-sama turned around cautiously, and saw that the three scantily clad men were still behind him, pursuing relentlessly.

"Dammit, can't you perverts leave me alone!"

"We're going to destroy you, Boxer-sama! And your boxers will be a sign of our victory!"

"Stop trying to take my boxers, freaks!"

The boys were sitting anxiously in a park in Konoha, sulking for having lost Boxer-sama. Gaara happened to be walking by, and stopped by them.

"Do you see why I chose not to go with you, yet?"

"Shut up… I'll beat him. I just lost him for now…" Shikamaru said, kicking a stone in frustration.

"No you won't. If you can't even deduce who he is, you'll never win."

"Oh, and you know who it is?" Neji asked in anger.

"Of course."

The boys looked at Gaara in surprise. They hurriedly scuttled to their feet, surrounding Gaara in hope.

"Tell us who he is!"

"… No." Gaara was firm in his decision.

"Why not! Don't you hate him too? He's taking over everything with his perverted boxers!"

"… He is a… Friend."

The boys, disappointed, sulked to the ground once again. Apart from Shikamaru, who was too busy calculating in his head.

"A friend of Gaara's, huh… Well, there can only be so many people who fill in that role, and if I reduce it to the people that know him here in Konoha, there's only really two people who can fill… that…" Shikamaru stopped in shock. "It's… It's either Sasuke… Or…"

Before they could continue, they heard something heading their way. They looked to see all the girls, running past them hastily.

"W-What's going on!" they yelled to them, but the girls just kept on running. Behind them, they saw Boxer-sama, who had let Tenten run on her own as long as she didn't turn around.

"B-Boxer-sama! Wait! We have to kill you, stop!" Boxer-sama ignored them, just running like crazy, zipping past them in a hurry. "Dammit, after him, everyone!"

The boys stood up, dashing after Boxer-sama, failing to notice the three underdressed people behind them, tailing Boxer-sama like missiles.

"WE WILL HAVE YOUR BOXERS, BOXER-SAMA!" Team GBN yelled out.

"WE WILL KILL BOXER-SAMA!" the boys cried.

"WE STILL HAVEN'T HAD ALL OUR DATES YET BOXER-SAMA!" the girls screamed.

"Oh God, somebody save me…" Boxer-sama whined, tears forming in his eyes. "It couldn't possibly get worse…"

At the mention of his unlucky saying, Boxer-sama looked ahead, and truly regretted saying what he did. There in front of him, led by many male teachers that he recognized, were probably all the males of Konoha, armed with whatever they could get, along with banners that read 'Stop Boxer-sama from ruining our lives!'

"There he is! STOP RUINING OUR LIVES, BOXER-SAMA!"

Boxer-sama felt the tears increase. "Okay, now it definitely can't get worse!"

Or so he thought, as he heard rumbling coming from either side of him. Turning to the left and right, he saw what were probably all the females of Konoha, led by many female teachers he recognized, all screaming like fan-girls as they saw Boxer-sama, holding banners that read 'We (heart) Boxer-sama!'

"There he is! WE HEART YOU, BOXER-SAMA!"

Boxer-sama was surrounded. In front of him were a group of girls that desperately wanted a date with him. Further more in front was every male that desperately wanted to rip him to shreds. To his sides was every woman that wanted to get into his boxers. Behind him was a group of boys intent on killing him. And further behind were the three underdressed freaks that wanted to strip his underwear off him.

"Now, definitely I know, IT CAN'T GET WORSE THAN THIS!"

"Please, Tsunade! You've gotta stop them! Boxer-sama's gonna end up dead in that riot!"

Jiraiya was hastily trying to get Tsunade to stop the village's outburst, but Tsunade wasn't particularly willing to help Boxer-sama.

"That's fine by me! If he's out of the picture, I won't have so much damn work piling up all the time!"

"But you don't understand, Tsunade! You can't do this!"

"Oh? And why not?"

Jiraiya frowned. There wasn't much he could say to stop her. He knew that there was only one thing he could do.

"Tsunade… You can't do this… Because of who Boxer-sama is."

Tsunade turned to face him in surprise.

"Then… Who is Boxer-sama?"

"Boxer-sama is…"

END CHAPTER 21

A/N: Well now, could everyone be coming to the same conclusion? Maybe. Does this mean that WTHAUOF will end soon? Who knows? Will Naruto ever get the chance to use his special restaurant-dating mode? I hope so. You'll just have to wait for a month and see. Oh yeah, and for people who didn't want to see Ita... 'N Ranger' naked... Sorry. :)