It's All Your Fault
Bartimaeus, you dumb bastard.
You knew I was going to die, and you didn't care. You knew that one blast was fatal, that I was bleeding internally. I knew you knew. We were fused together, remember? I could think all your thoughts with you. I knew you knew.
But you lied to me.
You told me I was going to be fine, that you were 'no doctor' anyway. You lied to me and told me I was going to live. That's what made me dismiss you so that the Staff of Gladstone would work, and I would live. I didn't want to die. Do you really think I believed you for even a little while?
Actually, I did.
I can't believe I fell for your word! You're a demon! I should've known you would betray me. Your a demon. A creature that would do anything in your power to hurt me. And you did. You did the ultimate betrayal. You killed me, Bartimaeus. And to think I actually trusted you at one point. I did. And you know I did. When you fused with me, I knew you knew. You did it, Bartimaeus. You killed a magician. Good job. You killed him just when he was at his most vulnerable point. I congratulate you.
You must be famous in the Other Place.
Ah, the Other Place. Kitty went there to convince you that we needed to do this. Perhaps she shouldn't have. We were fine without you. We didn't need you.
All we needed was each other.
But because of you we were torn apart. It really is all your fault. We were destined to be together, and you tore us apart. You split between us and cut any links we had. Whatever little connection we had was broken when you stepped in. Don't you get it? It's all your fault for my being dead. Why can't you get that through your thick essence? You dumbass! You'll never get it, will you?
I loved Kitty. And you knew it. But still you deliberately tore us apart. It's your fault I'm dead, and there's no going back.
One last thought: Go to hell. Back where you belong.
It's your fault I'm dead.
But more then anything, it's mine.