Jinpei answered the knock at the door. Opening it, his face fell as he saw not just Hakase, but his grandmother as well.
"Granny Nambu!" he said, surprised. "Hakase didn't tell me you were coming."
"Oh, young Jun was sweet enough to call me." Granny replied. "I was so thrilled to receive her invitation."
Jinpei planned to throttle Jun for not warning him about this. Come to think of it, that might solve the problem of having to eat her cooking.
But his pleasant daydreams were brushed aside when Nambu spoke.
"Granny has made her fruitcake again this year." the Doctor said.
"And I made an extra big one, just for you, Jinpei!" Granny exclaimed, "We've got to put some meat on those skinny bones of yours, don't we?" She reached up and pinched Jinpei's cheeks.
Jinpei hated having his cheeks pinched. He resolved to let some of his bug collection spend the night in Jun's bed.
He turned, relieved, as another knock sounded at the door. Outside stood Ken, Joe and Ryu.
"Oh, how wonderful!" Granny smiled. "Everyone is here."
The new arrivals were obviously taken aback by Granny Nambu's presence.
"Granny!" said Ken, recovering himself first, "So good to see you!" Dutifully he placed a kiss on her wrinkled cheek. She smelled like mothballs. Absently, Ken wondered where she had been stored over the summer.
"It's good to see you too, Ken." Granny said. "My, how you've grown. Soon you'll be getting yourself a little girlfriend, hmmmm?" She pinched his cheek.
Jinpei grinned at the mortified look on Ken's face. As long as it wasn't his cheek being pinched!
Joe was sidling along the wall, putting as much distance between him and Granny as possible.
But Ken wasn't about to let the Condor get away with that.
"Joe!" He called, beckoning to his second-in-command, "Come say hello to Granny Nambu!"
The look Joe threw at Ken would have made a dozen Galactor agents run screaming in fear. But the Eagle just grinned.
"Hi, Granny." Joe muttered. He gave her as quick a peck as possible, holding his breath as he got close to her. He hated the smell of mothballs.
"Little Joey!" exclaimed Granny, in delight. "How wonderful to see you!"
Granny grabbed the Condor around the neck and held him in an iron grip, oblivious to his flailing attempts to get free.
"My, you're such a big boy now! Why I remember when you used to run around my house without a stitch on. You were such a naughty boy… but you had such a cute, little tushie!"
With that she pinched Joe's bottom.
Ryu nearly fell over with laughter when he saw the look on Joe's face.
"And Ryu!" Granny released the Condor upon seeing the Owl. "How have you been? Are you still trying to learn how to fly?"
"Uh… actually, I do fly." stammered Ryu.
But Granny was lost in her memories.
"Ah yes… I recall the time when you covered yourself in my best lace tablecloth and jumped from my roof!" Granny reminisced. "Broke your leg in three places, didn't you?"
"Two…" muttered Ryu.
"Have you said hello to Jun yet, Granny?" volunteered Jinpei. "I know she'll be thrilled to see you!"
Ken, Joe and Ryu eagerly approved of Jinpei's suggestion.
"Oh, I don't want to disturb her while she's working so hard in the kitchen…" protested Granny.
"Oh, no!" insisted Jinpei, "You won't be interrupting! I know Jun would love your help cooking!"
It certainly couldn't make her food any worse, Joe thought wryly.
The four young men practically pushed Granny into the kitchen, but not before she promised to give them her special presents shortly.
Breathing a sigh of relief, Jinpei slumped into a booth.
Joe looked at the clock and sighed. It was going to be an excruciating evening.
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Jun looked up as Granny entered the kitchen.
"Granny Nambu!" she exclaimed. "I'm so glad you could come!"
"It was my pleasure, dearie." Granny replied.
Then her eyes fell upon Jacques.
"My goodness!" she murmured, "Who is this?"
It appeared that for all of her years Granny was not immune to the allures of male of the species. And Jacques certainly was quite the specimen. Wavy, blond hair, flashing blue eyes, and even white teeth complimented his chiseled features. Even in his casual sweater and pants it was obvious that he had the kind of muscular physique that most guys would kill for.
"Why, Junie!" Granny cried, "You've gotten yourself a little boyfriend!"
Jun flushed red in embarrassment as she protested Granny's assumption, but her voice went unheard.
"Oh, you two are so adorable together!" Granny exclaimed. "I'll just leave you alone, then."
Giving a sly grin, Granny slipped out of the kitchen.
"Oh Jacques, I'm so sorry!" Jun apologized. "Granny's quite old, and she gets easily confused..."
Jacques laughed. "Do not worry your pretty little head about it, Joon. I understand. But if you wanted to be my girlfriend, ma belle, I certainly wouldn't mind."
Jun blushed.
"Uh... thanks, Jacques." she stammered. Jun didn't know which was worse: having Granny assume that Jacques was her boyfriend, or having Jacques assume that she wanted him to be.
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"That was fast, Granny!" said Ryu, as the lady re-entered the room.
"Oh, I didn't want to stay too long. I wouldn't dream of disturbing Junie and her little boyfriend." Granny giggled.
"Boyfriend?" Ken exclaimed. He looked as if he had swallowed some of Granny's fruitcake unexpectedly. Joe had a green look on his face, while Jinpei, Ryu and Nambu wore expressions of shock.
"Oh yes…" Granny continued, oblivious to the stir her words had caused, "Jacques. Quite the good-looking young man, wouldn't you say, Ken?" She sighed. "If only I were sixty years younger…"
Ken looked as if he were going to be ill.
"He's in there… with Jun?" Joe asked.
"Yes…" whispered Granny slyly. "I think they're enjoying their little private time."
Joe groaned. He had thought this day couldn't get any worse.
Jun entered from the kitchen, Jacques at her side.
"Granny, I wanted to explain to you…" Jun's words trailed off as she saw six pairs of eyes bouncing between her and the Frenchman.
"So…" Ken said in a tight voice, "You must be Jacques." He stood up and stiffly offered his hand.
"So nice to meet you." Jacques replied. A confused look came over his face. "And who are you?"
Joe choked, attempting weakly to cover it up with a cough.
"Uh… these are my brothers." Jun rushed to explain, "My foster father, Dr. Nambu, and of course, you've already met Granny."
"Enchantee…" Jacques murmured, eyes darting around the room. He was getting a little nervous with some of the unsettling looks these brothers were directing at him.
"So Jun, I hear you're burning… uh… roasting… a turkey this year?" smirked Joe.
"Come on, Joe." Ken defended Jun. "It couldn't be any worse than the one she made two years ago!"
"You mean the turkey that was black on the outside and raw on the inside?" Joe laughed.
"Perhaps I should have made roast Condor!" Jun fumed. "I hear that deep fried Eagle is tasty too!"
Jacques looked shocked.
"But, Joon…" he protested, "The eagle, she is an endangered species!"
"This one certainly is." Jun growled, shooting a dark look at Ken.
Ken's face suddenly turned an exotic shade of red.
"Well since you're here, Junie," Granny said, ignoring the tension, "Why don't you all open my gifts? I worked especially hard on them this year."
Joe cursed under his breath.
"What was that, Joe?" asked Nambu with a glare.
But you know
That old Condor was so smart and so slick
He thought up a lie
And he thought it up quick!
"Uh… I said, 'What luck!'" Joe mumbled.
Granny pointed a bony hand toward the wads of wrapping paper that had been shoved to the back of the Christmas tree in the vain hope that she would forget about them.
"Well, don't just sit around! I've got one foot in the grave and the other on a banana peel! Joey, where are you?"
A nervous voice sounded out. "Right here, Granny…"
"Be a good boy and play Santa for us, will you?" She gave him another quick tushie pinch as he passed, causing the captive audience to erupt into giggling fits.
"Little Joey…", he grumbled under his breath, passing out the unruly packages to the team. Everyone reluctantly began to unwrap. Every year, Granny knitted something for them, and they each silently prayed it would only be a scarf.