The Amazing Drinking Elf!
So the dwarf was down and out. Legolas thought that maybe he could finally stop the silly game that his friend had started. Yet, he thought this too soon; for another man rose to the challenge to out drink the Mirkwood being. He introduced himself as Laurence, and said he had drinken as many as the elf. The prince couldn't refuse and so began the game again.
The burly man next to him was durable and wasn't giving up easily. As the tankards piled onto the bar counter, Laurence showed no sign of giving up (Neither did Legolas) Finally, the pair had driken twice as much as the dwarf. Laurence started to see in doubles and was getting blurry. On the other hand, the elf got a case of the giggles and couldn't stop ranting on about how silly the whole thing was. The man saw this as an advantage; the more his challenger laughed, the more air he lost. Hence, the less he could drink. Just as he thought this, Legolas' face all of a sudden grew very serious. He pointed a finger at the rough man and narrowed his eyes. In an almost serious voice, he said, "You're going down." With that, he picked up one of the dirty tankards and shoved it in front of the amused bartender. When the man went to refill it, the elf grabbed the keg of beer and lifted it onto the counter. It was three fourths full. "I know this'll probably kill me, but it's better than losing to someone like you!" With that last sentence a little squeaky, he popped the keg open from the top.
Laurence watched as the elf began to dip his glass in over and over again. The man quickly got to his feet and jumped on the counter. He did the same. Soon the keg was empty and the two of them were both standing. It was Laurence who gave up first. His body jolted, and he suddenly leaned into the keg. A rancid smell and sound came from him as his stomahc emptied itself. A smile was placed on Legolas' face. He was a drunk as anyone could be, but he had won.
With a sigh, the Mirkwood prince sat back down on the stool. Then all of a sudden, another man came up. He was twice as big as Laurence had been. In a shaky voice, he declared, "I've been drinking as much as you two! Now I, Holandill, Challange you to continue this drinking match!"
Legolas moaned and picked up another glass. Then he stared at the man. 'this one can't handle more than one more glass.' With a smile in his mind, he soon found himself right. When the man collapsed, the elf thought that maybe, he was finally done. Yet again, another man stepped to the challenge. Again, the man was out as quickly as the last. This went on for many hours, until it was only Aragorn, Theoden, Eowyn, Gandalf, and Legolas, still concious in the entire bar.
The future king of Gondor walked over to his elven friend and asked, "What did you do?" In a laughing voice, he spoke, "I won!" With that, he fell forward onto the bar counter and fell asleep.