Summary: Peter and Edmund are still lost, but hey, at least Ed's enjoying it.

Notes: Even I don't know where I'm going with this. Actually, I do. I just can't figure out why I wrote it in the first place. BUT! Anyway, hope you all enjoy. Standard disclamers apply, as in, I own nothing, no profit, blah blah blah.

Also: SLASH! That's right...once more SLASH. Boys kissing. Yes. That's what slash is. I do NOT want any flames because of it. You've all had fair warnings, kay? Right. Now then...

"Okay. Now this is really starting to get me irritated."

"Really? It only took you this long?"

"Shut up, Peter, I'm thinking."

"About what?"

"Stuff."

"What could you possibly be thinking of! You keep leading us no-where, and-"

"Oh shove it, at least I'm trying."

"I was trying too, you know."

"Yeah. Sleeping is really working hard."

"I was taking a break!"

"My arse, you were!"

Peter had to forcibly hold himself back from hitting Edmund upside the head. They had come to a fork in the road, as it were, and Edmund simply couldn't decide which to take. He stood in the middle, hands on his hips, looking back and forth between the two. Peter, on the other hand, had taken to sulking a few steps behind him. His pants had dried off, but he was as hungry as ever. And hungry teenagers were never a good thing.

"Go left." Peter said through his teeth.

"Left?"

"Yes. Left."

Edmund surveyed the corridor in question.

"Why left?"

"Cause I say so."

"Is that all?"

"Does there need to be more?" Peter growled.

"Suppose not."

Ed took off, marching to some tune he was humming, with Peter following closely behind, shoulders sagging, and fists clenched.

"Which door this time? How about, second on the right?" he asked, not waiting for an answer, nor looking for one. Peter grunted behind him.

Edmund stopped infront of the door, seemed to think a moment, and then stepped aside.

"You open it Peter."

"Why?"

"Why not?"

Peter sighed, but stepped forward and pulled the door open. He peered inside.

"I can't see. Probably just another empty room, though."

"One moment, then."

Peter spun around to the sound of his brother's retreating footsteps.

"Ed! Where are you going! Don't you dare leave me-"

"Relax," came Ed's voice, "I'm just snagging one of the torches."

And sure enough, he came bounding back, torch in hand.

"You know," Peter mused, "I wonder if these have to be lit by someone, or if they're just really idiot torches that don't know when to go out."

"Dunno." Edmund said, ducking into the room, "I guess we'll have to ask some time."

"Right. That'll be first on my priority list."

"Don't be such a wet blanket…oh! Hey!"

"What? What is it?"

Peter peered anxiously into the room. Had Edmund found another doorway? A secret passage? A map? Maybe even some fried chicken and potatoes with a nice pint of stout…

"Look what I found!" Edmund proclaimed merrily, coming out with something cradled in his arms. Upon closer inspection, Peter had to fight his urge to throttle his brother.

Nestled in his arms was a brown, molted, dying, potted plant.

"Ed," Peter said through gritted teeth, "I hope I can eat that."

Ed looked down, "You know, I'm not sure. Wouldn't try it, though. It doesn't look too good."

"Okay. Right. Well. Put that thing down and lets get moving again."

"Put it down?"

Peter turned, oh-so slowly, rounding on his brother.

"You mean to keep it?"

Edmund smiled, "Well sure. There's still some life left in the little guy. We can nurse him back to health. It can be like our little pet."

Peter felt the beginnings of headache coming on. He abruptly about-faced, and marched down the corridor.

"You know, I think I preferred the kissing!" he called over his shoulder.

"You know! I did too!"

Peter threw his hands up into the air. By Aslan, was this ever going to end?

Ed's voice still carried on behind him,

"You know, maybe we should name him."

"Him?"

"Our plant."

"Our plant?"

"Yes. Our plant. I think, maybe…Archibald."

"Idiotic."

"Phinneus"

"Pathetic."

"Yeah…oh, I know. Petey."

Peter stopped dead in his tracks.

"Yes. Yes I think so. Petey it is."

Peter let out something between a growl and a howl and kicked at the nearest door. Much to his dismay and surprise, however, his foot went right through the rotted wood. Cursing, Peter tugged at his foot, only to find it well and stuck.

"Edmund."

"Yes, brother."

"Do be a dear and help out."

Edmund came into view, still holding the torch in one hand, and Petey the Miraculous Potted Plant in the other. Peter gritted his teeth, and tried another vain tug. Edmund tsk-ed and handed Peter the torch, taking a closer look at the boot the door held prisoner.

"Oh, I think I can help."

"Please. Do."

"There's a condition."

Edmund ducked down swiftly and unblinkingly as Peter's hand swiped at the area where his head was. He shifted the plant in his arms.

"You're wedged in there pretty good, O' brother. I'd be nice if I were you."

Peter groaned loudly.

"Fine. I'll do whatever. Just get me out."

"Alrighty. First-"
"You mean there's more than one?"

"FIRST," Edmund straightened, clearing his throat, "You have to promise to give up the grouchy attitude and be a bit more personable. I'm in this mess too, you know."

"I don't see your foot in a door."

"Peter…"

"Alright, alright." Peter took a deep breath, and rubbed his face with his hands. "I swear it to you. I'll do my best to keep myself in check. I'm sorry, Ed."

"That's alright. At least now, we got that covered. Now, secondly," he grinned wildly, "You have to kiss me again."

There was a very pregnant pause.

"Again?" Peter squeaked.

"Again. Besides, you were the one who said you'd rather be kissing."

"Fine, fine. Just get me out."

Edmund smiled wider and set Petey gently down to the side. He then nimbly began to untie the laces on Peter's boots, humming as he did so. Peter, on the other hand, was getting rather tired of standing on one leg.

"Just a moment, now," Edmund's voice came from somewhere around Peter's knees, "We'll get your foot out first, then your boot…just need something to wedge in there…" he felt around his tunic, and from seemingly nowhere, pulled out a small dagger.

"Here we are then-"

"Edmund, dear?"

"Hmm?"
"Are you planning to wedge that inbetween my foot and the door?"

"Yes."

"Please, please, for the love of Aslan be careful."

Edmund simply chuckled.

"Oh, no worries. I'm plenty good at-"

A sudden, very, very loud noise cut them off. Something between a roar and a scream and something very metallic echoed off the walls of the corridor, shaking dust from the rafters. Edmund shot upright, and Peter's lips thinned to a line.

"Peter, that was a-"

"Fury."

"Inside Cair Paravel?"

Peter squinted into the darkness, trying to see past the little light the few torches offered.

"I think we're the first people to come down here in a long time, Ed. He's probably been hiding out down here for a while."

Another screeching roar reverberated past them, and Peter could swear he felt the air around him move in its wake.

"Edmund?"

"Yeah?"

"Get me out."

"Yeah."

Edmund began to work feverishly on the door that held his brother captive, while Peter continued to scan the corridor, gripping the torch tightly. He could here scratching, slithering noises moving somewhere up ahead. It wasn't on top of them, yet, but it certainly could get that way fast. He could feel his brother's nimble fingers begin to unlace his boot, breathing just slightly faster than normal.

"Try it now, Peter."

The High King gave a mighty tug but the foot, lodged in above the ankle, remained unmoving. The rest of him, however, became very unbalanced and, foot slipping out from under him, Peter landed heavily on his shoulder.

"Oww…."

"Geez, Peter--"

The Fury screamed again, and this time it sounded much, much closer. Very much around the corner and down the hall. Peter gripped the torch, which miraculously had neither gone out nor caught his hair on fire. If this thing found them, he could at least singe its eyebrows.

Edmund, brow furrowed, pulled his dagger out of the door with an almighty yank, sending it clattering to the floor. Then he reached around and grabbed Petey by the pot, just as the beast rounded the corner.

A/N: Kay, so there it is! Chapter two! Be prepared for the upcoming chapter three! (Imagine!) After this fic, though, my stuff's taking a rather angsty turn. So, love a little humor while you can. Reviews are love. You know they are. :D