A/N: Yes, I am ashamed. I oughta be after taking this long to update. Well, finally, here I am updating Coquettish. Be proud.

On a related note, I might mention a few things about this chapter. One is that there are a few different flavors of junkyard that go through my stories. This flavor matches that found in "Skimble's Day Off" and "A Grand Night Out." That said, one or two of the Skimble jokes (like his having a front door and Jellylorum's intentional ooc-ness) might be in reference to S'sDO. Also please note that as I was writing out different situations all over the junkyard ... I ran out of cats. So Sillabub appears in addition to Jemima. Just work with me here. But do enjoy.

"How were classes today, Dearie?"

"Oh, they amaze me more every day. You know, it's astounding the rate at which those little mice learn."

"Lovely, Dearie."

Skimbleshanks and Jennyanydots sat together in their homey little den, enjoying a home-cooked meal and discussing the day they'd had. "Really," Jenny went on, "It's as though they were created to learn! Not a day goes by but I find one of them doing something new, or improving on what I've taught them, or – "

"Jenny," Skimble interrupted, looking at her suspiciously, "I can't help but notice that we are eating mousecake..."

"Oh," Jenny mumbled "... that. Well, let's just say some mice don't learn as quickly as others."

knock-

"Did you hear that?" Jenny noticed. "It sounded like a half-knock at the door, like someone was trying to knock, but stopped in the middle ...?"

"I'm not opening that door for anything," Skimble mumbled under his breath.

"Shoosh, you," his mate chided.

"Skimble? Jenny? Are you in there?" Jellylorum could be heard from outside.

"See? It's just Jelly," Jennyanydots scolded, getting up to get the door. "Don't say you won't open the door." As she approached the wooden harbinger of doom, she called out, "Come in, Jelly!"

The door shook a bit as Jellylorum tried to open it, but alas, it would not budge! "Jenny!" she called in, "It won't budge!"

"That's odd," Jennyanydots muttered, trying the knob herself. It would not budge! "Is there something in the way?"

"No," came the response. "But the door is bright green!"

"Is something the matter?" Skimbleshanks asked, coming to the door.

"Jelly says the door is bright green! And it won't budge!"

"Bright green?" Skimble repeated. "Did someone paint it?"

Then it dawned on all three at the same time: someone had painted the door, and the paint had covered the crack between the door and the doorframe and sealed it shut.

"Jelly, we're trapped!" Jennyanydots cried.

"I'll go get help!" came the muffled response. The pound of pawsteps could be heard as Jellylorum ran off for help.

"Jelly's off to get help?" Skimble lamented. "This could take a while ..."

"Jerrie, what's this?" Rumpleteazer inquired of the similarly-striped tiger tabby next to her as they sorted through their loot as they headed back to their den after a raid.

He looked at the device (which any human would readily recognize as a television remote control), and smirked. "That," he started, a clever glint in his eye, "Is a bona fide whatchamajiggit."

"Really?" Rumpleteazer replied. She stared at it in wonder and breathed, "Wow ..."

"You see, the wonderful thing about whatchamajiggets," Mungojerrie began to expound, "Is whatchamajiggets are wonderful things. Their tops are made out of rubber. Their bottoms are made out of – "

"Jerrie! Your paws are green!" his partner in crime suddenly exclaimed.

He examined his feet for a moment, said, "Huh, would you look at that!" and continued, "As I was saying, as long as you have a whatchamajigget, there are several things you can do with it ... "

This one-sided conversation went on for several minutes until, turning the corner around a rather large junkpile, Rumpleteazer glanced down at the ground and cried, "Look, Jerrie! Pawprints!"

"You're right, 'Teazer! And they look like their heading that way! Let's follow them!" Thus, entranced by the prospect of a good mystery, Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer headed off in pursuit of the pawprints, not noticing that as they did, Rumpleteazer splashed through a puddle of the same color as Mungojerrie's conspicuously colored paws ...

Ah, another beautiful day to be me!

Thus went the thoughts of the most conspicuous playboy tom in the yard as he sashayed around, as was his habit this time of day. It was the perfect time to do it in, too: right in between "take a beauty-catnap in the sun" time and "primp tail-fur" time. He sighed and caught the image of his handsome face in a reflective auto bumper. Oh yes, it was truly a beautiful day to be The Tugger.

Or so he thought.

Spying one Cassandra, slinky feline extraordinaire, he decided his efforts of the morning would be best spent trying to elicit a swoon from the queen. He crept over to the car hood on which she was napping, arranging himself to lay all over it as well, and proceeded to tickle the fur just behind her ears.

"Tugger, I know it's you," Cassandra moaned, coming out of sleep. "You're the only cat who ever tickles behind the ears for no reason at all. And I know what you're thinking, but I'm not interested. You know I'm attached to Alonzo."

Tugger, a bit miffed, but still determined, arched his back seductively and replied, "Aww, come on, don't say that 'till you've had a look at the goods, darling."

Cassandra rolled her eyes and rolled over to face him. "You know, you really are full of – " she began, but stopped dead when she caught sight of him.

The maned tom, assuming she had been caught off-guard by his debonaire good looks, continued, "Oh, I am full of something all right. I am full of – "

"Pink!"

Hmm? " ... Pink?" Tugger prompted curiously (as was his nature).

"Pink! You're pink!" Cassandra gasped through giggles. "What kind of an idea is that? You painted yourself pink! Did you think that would work on me? Maybe Etcetera, or even Victoria, but then again, you don't even have to goad them on ... but pink, Tugger?!" And with that, she exploded into a fit of giggles, and was unreachable by the spoken word.

Tugger, more than a bit miffed by now, muttered "Pink?" to himself, and went off to find a mirror ...

"Aww, man, this is going to be so funny!"

"Pounce, are you sure this is going to work?"

"Of course it's going to work, Tumble!" Pouncival explained to his current partner in crime. "All we have to do is sneak into the junkpile the queenkits sleep under, rearrange all their favorite things, and they'll think each other got into it and messed with their stuff! It'll be perfect!" he announced as they came upon the back entrance to the queenkits' domicile. "We just have to move aside the box that blocks the back door. Come on, help me!"

"Eh, that's okay, I'll watch," Tumblebrutus decided. Pouncival shrugged, and got to work on the box. Tumble sat down on the ground, and in boredom, started playing around with a little rubber ball that he found next to him. Hmm, I don't remember this ball being red, he thought to himself. He soon discovered the reason for the odd hue as splotches of red soon started coming off on his paws. Thinking mischievously, he soon called out, "Hey Pounce, think fast!"

As Pouncival turned around from what he was working on, a red ball smacked into his face. "Oh, very funny," he retorted as he threw the ball back to Tumblebrutus. "Either help me or don't, but don't bug me, sheesh. You didn't have to get that red stuff all over me, you know!"

Tumblebrutus chuckled to himself and went back to playing with the ball.

They were soon interrupted, however, by a shout of, "Hey, what are you two doing!?"

Both tomkits spun around to see Etcetera coming toward them quickly. "We weren't doing anything!" Pouncival tried to explain hastily. "We were just – "

"Nuh uh! I know you were trying to sneak into our den, weren't you!" Etcetera accused.

Tumblebrutus stood up in their defense, "No, really Etcetera, we were just trying to move the box! We didn't know it led into your den! Honest!"

Etcetera considered this, then caught a glimpse of their paws and exclaimed happily, "No way! I caught you two red-handed! You have to have been doing something bad!" She folded her arms, very proud of herself. "I'm telling on you to Gus. He's gonna make you sorry!" And she began to drag them both away toward the den of the Old Theater Cat.

"No, Etcetera, wait, that's just an expression!" Pouncival tried to protest, but it was too late for him. They were being dragged off whether they wanted to be or not.

"Wow, Jerrie! Have you ever seen so many pawprints!"

"No, Teazer! And they just keep going! There must have been fifty cats running around here!" He blurted, referring to the sheer number of pairs of pawprints they had been tracking for the last half hour or so. "Come on, Teazer! For the sake of the 'yard, we have to find all these cats and find out why they're leaving all these prints all over!"

Rumpleteazer nodded, the green-pawed queen following her equally green-pawed mate, leaving equally green little pawprints in their wake.

"Gus! Pouncival and Tumblebrutus were trying to sneak into our den and do something bad!"

"We were not!"

Gus the Theater Cat, a little surprised to be called upon to mediate, glared at them with rheumy eyes. "What were they doing exactly, Electra?"

Etcetera sighed and said, "I'm Etcetera, and they were trying to sneak into our den and do bad stuff, Gus!"

"Ah ..." Gus seemed to consider this. "So what do you boys have to say for yourselves?"

"We weren't doing nothing!" they both retorted together.

"Hmm ... well, you must have been doing something, if you were being sneaky around the queenkits' den ... " Gus seemed to consider this to himself. "Perhaps ... you have developed a fondness for one of the queens?"

"What?!" Tumblebrutus cried. "Gus, no way! They're girls! They've got cooties!"

"All right, maybe not you then, but maybe you, Pouncival? Is there a certain girl who has been catching your eye?" Pouncival opened his mouth to protest, but he was soon interrupted by Gus announcing, "There is no need to respond! I can see it from the way you are blushing! You are most certainly in love, young Pouncival!"

Pouncival could only mutter, "Wah...?" before he recalled the redness that had stuck to his cheeks from the ball. "Wait, Gus, no! It's just paint! It's – !"

But he was soon interrupted by blind old Gus taking him by the paw and leading him away, with explanations of wanting to inform him of what happens when a tomkit takes a fancy to a queenkit.

Listening to the snickers of the other two kittens behind him, Pouncival muttered, "Oh, I am so going to get whoever got paint all over that ball!"

"Mungojerrie? Rumpleteazer? What are you doing?" Demeter inquired of the two tabbies laying stricken on the ground before her.

"We ... trying ... catch (huff) ... the cat ... (wheeze) ... making ... pawprints!" Rumpleteazer gasped out, utterly exhausted.

This still left Demeter puzzled. "But ... why are you so tired?" she asked.

Gasping, Mungojerrie gasped out, "Chasing for ... (huff) seven hours ... at least."

Demeter looked down at the ground around her. There were indeed prints in the dirt. There was a multitude of little green pawprints, looking like an army of cats had made its way through the junkyard. She was about to gasp in alarm herself, when she took notice of the state of the tabbies' own paws. "Did you two notice your feet were green?" she inquired hesitatingly.

Rumpleteazer, seeming to gain a little more energy by this time, sat up and mumbled, "Yeah, but we figured it was a trick by all those cats we were chasing to distract us and get us off the trail."

Demeter grimaced and offered, "Well, did you think maybe ... you two were making all the pawprints?"

Mungojerrie sat up himself and retorted, "What?! How could we be making the pawprints?"

"Yeah!" Rumpleteazer joined in, "It's not like we have anything on our ... Oh ..." She looked remorseful and glanced up at her mate. "Jerrie, did we see the prints before or after we noticed our paws were green?"

"After," Mungojerrie replied calmly. Then it dawned on him. "Oh... I am so going to get whoever tricked us into this!"

Demeter, a little off to the side and examining a green puddle, offered, "You might want to start with whoever it was who spilled all this green paint over here."

"Munkustrap!" Jellylorum screamed, crashing into Munkustrap's den. "You have to come quick! Skimbleshanks and Jennyanydots are stuck in their – !"

"Shh, Jellylorum!" Jellylorum then found herself quickly but politely deposited outside the den. "I'm sorry, but I'm a little busy right now. Come back later." And with that, he promptly turned around and proceeded right back into his den.

"But Munkustrap!" Jellylorum exclaimed as she followed him right back inside, "You have to help! Skimble and Jenny are - ... Um ... Munkustrap?"

"Yes?" the tabby responded as Jellylorum stopped her requests suddenly.

"Why is the inside of your den pink?"

Munkustrap, becoming shy all of a sudden, tried to get her out with, "Can you just leave me alone? It's a choice, okay?"

Undeterred, Jellylorum went on, "But ... Munkustrap, what brought this about?"

"Let's just say I've found someone new, okay?"

"Munkustrap?"

Turning a little pink himself, Munkustrap muttered, "Let's just leave it at that. Trust me, you don't want to know any more ..."

"Hey, Electra! Long time no see!" Sillabub greeted her friend, coming over to sit down next to her. "Did I miss much while I was away at my humans' house?"

Electra, her eyes still closed from napping, chuckled to herself. "Oh yes, I dare say you missed much. There's a new cat in the yard. He's bright pink. You'll love him. Well, sorta ..."

"What do you mean by that?" Sillabub asked ingenuously.

Electra considered a bit before going on. "Well, he's kind of gotten a hold of a big pile of paint cans, and he was kind of messing around with them a lot today, so by the end of the day, I'll bet a lot of cats aren't going to be so happy with him."

"Oh," Sillabub mumbled. "Well, what kinds of things has he been doing?"

Both queens looked up as a very pink Rum Tum Tugger went screaming past them across the yard, crying out "I'M PINK! I'M PINK! I'M PINK!"

"Things like that," Electra mumbled.

"Oh," Sillabub said. "And that?" she asked, referring to Admetus, who, at this point, was trying to sneak across the yard inconspicuously, still trying to hide the large "R" on his chest.

"Nah, Admetus did that to himself."