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Chapter 19: Purpose

Alec woke up with a start. He had been dreaming. No, not dreaming, remembering. He had been reliving his days back in Manticore. He suddenly realized he really was glad to be out of there. For a few days after his escape he'd told himself he wasn't sure if it was a good thing, him being on the outside. But thinking of it more, he was glad. That place was disturbing.

He found himself still confused. What if his crazy old cellmate had been right for once? Alec cursed, wishing he'd pressed it further back then. Maybe 302 really did know something about those shots. Those damn shots, Alec thought. Why did they bother him so much? He had gone along with so many procedures of Manticore, but he'd never felt comfortable with that. It really did make him feel like an experiment.

He shuddered at the thought. What if he was a twin, some mass produced DNA? A twin of Ben, who Max seemed to care about much more than him. Alec accepted it, the possibility. If he was a twin, being psycho analyzed to somehow explain Ben's errors, maybe it wasn't that big of a deal. It wouldn't be too much further of a stretch than what he already knew. It just was another problem to look over his shoulder about.

Alec was frustrated. He found himself wanting to find out more, something unusual for him. He felt that maybe if he found out what was in those shots he would finally have truly escaped Manticore.

Maybe even escape Max, he thought. He wanted the thought of Max to leave him. It wasn't bad when she wasn't there, but when she was around him, it seemed…

He didn't like the thought. It was what she'd said, talking about their better purpose.

Was Max Alec's purpose? He couldn't stay in this house, however nice, just thinking about it.

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Max was still wearing the dress. It didn't feel that comfortable, but then, nothing did these days. She didn't like it when the bad guy was her own unexplainable feelings. She found herself missing the days when she had a clear target to get rid of so she would feel secure again. She was sitting at her special place, atop of all Seattle, looking down at everything.

She allowed the tears to come. It had been a long time since she'd had a moment to be honest with herself. Her sadness was overwhelming- she didn't even realize quite how unhappy she was till this moment. She wished Alec could tell her why he was there. Maybe it would give her some insight as to why she was there. Why she remained, jeopardizing herself and people she cared about.

She found herself feeling a deep longing for Ben. Alec had his face. By now she saw how different they were, they really were 2 separate people. But she could really use Ben right now, he used to take care of her. He would calm her and comfort her even in the craziest situations.

Well Logan did say one of my siblings was probably in town thieving, she thought to herself. But she knew in her heart it wouldn't be Ben. She really didn't know why she was thinking of him so suddenly and so deeply. It was like the sight of Alec had woken something up within her, longing for Ben. She couldn't tell if it was sisterly love, but even after all these years, she still cared deeply for Ben.

Max found that even though she wanted to know all her family was safe and happy, she wanted to see Ben more than anything. Zack had told her he would check on the others. Would Zack know where Ben was?

Max wondered where Zack was. He had to be gone by now. Why couldn't she have brought herself to ask him? Why couldn't she have stayed with him to find out more, to help him? She still didn't know what had gone on with Zack during his absence. She wasn't sure she wanted to know. She had a feeling it was horrible. She didn't like living in denial, but she also didn't know if she could handle knowing what had happened to Zack because of her.

"Zack!" Max called out. No one would hear her, this high up. As she said his name, more tears came. She needed comfort, but no one was there to offer. She would have to be strong on her own. She hadn't chosen this life- it was placed upon her. She was different. She didn't have the luxuries of being vulnerable. If she allowed herself to show her heart, her enemies would play to her weakness. People would die. This was her path.

The moment was gone. Max felt better, stronger. She couldn't help but have moments like these sometimes. After all, she was partially human at least. As she stood up, her long hair flew in the breeze, along with her dress. She felt ready. She would need to catch this thief.

Max felt just about ready to leave when she noticed the wind change ever so slightly, indicating movement. She wasn't alone.