Dear Reader,

Wow... I'm on a role... Maybe it's because I'm taking a break from my other fanfiction? But right now I'm just really into this fic. Rawr. Go me. My mommy says I need to get a job. So right now I'm working for her! Yay! Ten bucks a week to give the house a thorough cleaning. And then there's the usual mowing the lawn, weeding the garden, feeding the livestock, feeding the cats and the rabbits and the pigs. Moving the horse to another part of the lawn I can't get to. Cooking. Carting the little brother to the swimming pool and baseball practice (GO LIONS! RAWR!). But really... I sent out five or six applications and people have yet to call me... grumblegrumble... Oh well! I still have fanfiction! And square bailing season is starting soon, maybe I can hire myself out to other farms as a wagon tosser!

I don't own Gundam Wing

I don't own My Immortal by Evenescence

Kami-Crimson- Dude, you're making me blush! I got all teary eyed. Your reviews mean a lot to me. I just write down what I see in my head... And there is a lot in my head... My friend Everfire has accused me of having way too much in my head. She's a hypocrite. She has too much in her head too. Ramble away! It's good for you! Rambling helps bleed off mental stressors that would otherwise force one to seek psychiatric help! Believe me I know... Rambling goooood... Peace out.

Thank you to my reviewers and my friends and my family and my cousin who really shouldn't play with guns, I don't care if the raccoons are moving in you're making my dog psychotic with all the popping noises... Go somewhere else to shoot your stupid revolver. Heck, get rid of the stupid revolver and get yourself a nice, reliable rifle! Those things are better for shooting rabid wildlife than that little toy...Grrrrr... Show off... I hope you end up shooting your thumb off (again). What would Grandpa do if he saw you! He'd wack you upside the head with his cane that's what he'd do!

HERE'S TO MY COUSIN WHO GOT MARRIED! YAAAAY! THE FAMILY GROWS! SOON WE SHALL NUMBER IN THE THOUSANDS AND TAKE OVER THE WORLD! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA! BOHEMIANS BREED LIKE RABBITS! WHEEEE!(At least my family does... My family tree is bigger than I am...)

Okay... It seems today is my day for rambling about my wacko family... Hee... I wuv my fambly

Stay safe
Stay healthy
Sincerely,

Starr

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In a small apartment near Preventers Headquarters Chang WuFei sat alone on his bed. He smiled dully at the bandage on his arm. He couldn't even remember what tool he had been using, but the cut was dangerously near a major artery. He snorted.

"See how the mighty has fallen." He muttered.

He hated who he was. He was still a soldier. A fighter. A killer. There was nothing really there for him to live for anymore now that the battles were over and 'True Peace' had come. His first beloved enemy, Treize Kushrenada, had died by his own hand. The memory of Treize had haunted him for a long time. It still did sometimes. Now his other beloved enemy had found the peace and releif he could not.

Heero Yuy had probably been the only person who had truly understood him. Although, unlike WuFei, he had tried to find peace in a 'Normal' life. He had failed and had decided that death was easier. But in doing so he had left the one person who had truly needed him behind. Now, like his memories of Treize, WuFei was obsessed with those memories of Heero. They haunted constantly.

WuFei snorted. He understood why Heero had done it, probably better than most. That pain was now a daily constant in his life. What was he doing here? He didn't belong here! Not in this life. Unwrapping the bandage WuFei stared longingly at the stitches. Faint scars traced his body from injuries sustained in the war and from when the inner pain had become too much to bear alone.

Six months. It had been six months since Heero had escaped this cage called life. Relena had said it had been an accident, but WuFei had seen the look in her eyes. She had known what had happened. She had even known it was going to happen. That's the kind of person Heero was. He had known far more than he had let on in the past. He was amazing. His mind was so sharp and clever he could wriggle his way out of any trap. Even the trap called life.

Heero used to drive him made with frustration. He would say one ting yet do another. It amazed WuFei that such a violent and emotionless person could hold such peaceful morals and ideals. He seemed emotionless, but WuFei had been the only one to ever see Heero's tears. Had been the only one to hear his nightmares.

In a way WuFei had used Heero to support himself. Soon after Heero's death WuFei had realized how much he had needed Heero to keep himself sane. If Heero could survive, so could he. But Heero hadn't survived. WuFei had. But for how much longer, he didn't know. It was like in all of those suicide missions they had gone into. Always there had been someone left behind. In a way Heero had been the one left behind. But in another way Heero had been the one to escape, leaving them to deal with the aftermath.

Sometimes he thought he could see Heero. It was eerie the way his visage would seem to appear out of nowhere. But it was only his mind trying to recapture something that was long dead.

Sometimes WuFei would go to the statue in the park where the pilots used to go when they were trying to relax during the war. He remembered fondly the time Duo had brought along a pack of cigarettes he had snitched off of one of the OZ higher ups during an infiltration mission. The package had been passed and they sat around, talking of the future for hours. It was like some secret brotherhood. In a time whre the future was uncertain and they knew they could all be dead tomorrow, it had been nice to hang out like the teenageers they were tand talk about a future that could never be.

Duo had spoken of his wish to get laid before he turned sixteen. He wanted to date and have pretty girls hang on his arm all day. He wanted to be loved.

Trowa wanted to return to the circus and be an acrobat. He wanted to truly be a brother to his pretty co-worker, Catherine. In a moment of brotherly over-protectiveness he had also threatened to kill Duo if he ever tried anything.

'Depends...' Duo had said, 'She might be a hag, who knows what your taste in girls is.' That had earned him the noogying of his life. Quatre wanted to take over his father's business.

'And when we're in trouble you can save our asses.' Duo had said, earming him another noogy.

'And what do you want to be when you grow up Mr. Chang?' Duo had asked sweetly, still rubbing his aching skull. WuFei had glared at him and snapped,

'When I know I'll tell you smart-ass.' Duo had held up his hands in surrender and turned to Heero.

'Well Heero?' Quatre asked, 'What do you want to do? What's your little dream?' Heero had taken a drag on his cigarette, blew the smoke out slowly and said,

'I want a family. Get married. Have children. No more than two. Doesn't matter, boy or girl. Both would be nice.'

'Wow, Heero.' Quatre said after they had all stopped staring at him in shock, 'You've got this all figured out don't you?' Heero had shrugged and ground out his cigarette.

They hadn't been to the Statue in a long time. Not since the war had ended. WuFei's smile turned bitter at the memory. Heero hadn't gotten his wish. Instead he had died. The Winner company was now more successful than ever. Trowa was about to become an uncle and had also been nearly arrested for being caught in the park making out with Quatre's youngest sister, Ruthie. Instead of becoming a gigolo Duo had actually gotten into a catholic college and spent his free time helping out the homeless and giving last rights at the hospital. Of the five of them only two had gotten what they origionally wanted. Duo seemed happy with his life. But WuFei still didn't know what he wanted. He scowled and ran his fingers over the stiches, releshing the pain in a twisted sort of way. The pain reminded him how human he was. How inhuman he was. How inhuman they all were. He then came to a realization. Something about himself and about Heero.

"I'm not like you. I'm not as foolish as you were. There was a reason behind your death. I can see it. And I'll be damned if I don't figure it out sooner or later. You just wait my friend. They may not have realized it, but you had this planned from the very start..."

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I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears

And if you have to leave I wish that you would just leave
Because your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone

These wounds don't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

You used to captivate me
By your resonating light
But now I'm bound by the life you left behind

Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away all the sanity in me

When you cried I'd wip away all of your tears
When you screamed I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand thorugh all of these years
But you still have all of me

I've tried to tell myself that you're gone
But thought you're still with me
I've been alone all along

These wounds don't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

When you cried I wiped away all of your tears
When you screamed I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me