Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all related characters and ideas are the whole intellectual property of Ms. J.K. Rowling and are hers alone to sell. I do not receive, nor would I accept any compensation for any of the owned intellectual property of Ms. Rowling (nor that which she has licensed to WB etc.). What follows is just a wacky little ditty I wanted to get out of my brain. It only got there because I so love that which Ms. Rowling created. No copyright infringement is intended.

Talking

'Harry,' Remus said after hearing Harry vent all his frustrations over the various reactions of the students to finding out that he was a parselmouth. 'What's important is that your real friends know that you're still you and that nothing has changed.'

'Yeah,' Harry said with a heavy sigh. 'That's what Dad said…'

'So you see, I agree with him – and you know how rare that is!' His eyes twinkled, eliciting a slight smile from Harry. 'And you said that the kids you're closer with have been alright?'

'Yeah, a couple were a little weirded out for a bit, but I let them ask me questions… And most of Gryffindor are alright with it now 'cause I left out some books on it in the common room. The worst are some of the Muggle-borns in Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff. Not to mention the Slytherins...'

'What about the Slytherins?' Remus asked, concerned and glancing briefly over Harry's shoulder at Severus who sat at his desk writing, unable to hear what they were saying due to the privacy bubble he and Harry were still employing over their floo-chats. Remus knew that Severus wouldn't allow any students to harass Harry and he had the most control over his own house – but if he didn't know…

'Oh they're not doing it to be mean or anything,' Harry assured quickly, obviously picking up on Remus' concern. 'Well, except for Malfoy, but he's always nasty to me. I don't know what I ever did to that twit to make him hate me so much… And Crabbe and Goyle just do whatever Malfoy tells them…' Harry sighed briefly, shifting his position slightly where he sat cross-legged in front of the fireplace.

'But even they're not doing anything overt. Not after how much trouble Malfoy got in after the duelling club. I don't think he wants to cross Dad again…'

'Big time trouble huh?'

'Yeah,' Harry replied almost sadly. 'Dad said it was about him using illegal hexes in his first duel and with me 'cause he was supposed to be disarming only, and he'd been warned after the first duel… I think he's been reported before too. Still,' Harry added shrugging. 'Stupid git blames me and he is blo—peeved.'

'What's he doing?'

'Well…' Harry looked up at him. 'I can't prove it's him… but I know it is, you know?' Remus nodded, encouraging him to go on.

'Snakes keep popping up everywhere I go – but never when there's a professor around – or most of the prefects…'

'What's your Dad say about that?'

Harry mumbled something so quietly that even with his exceptional hearing Remus had to ask him to repeat it.

'Well, I said I can't prove it's him…'

'Harry, you know you should tell him anyway – if not who you suspect is behind it, then at least that it's happening. Let him find out for himself who it is. Then it's not that you've gotten anyone in trouble… Why don't you want him to know?' Remus asked in frustration, seeing Harry shaking his head.

'They'll get tired of it and stop soon anyway…'

'And…'

'And…' Harry threw up his hands, exhaling explosively. 'I don't want anyone else getting in trouble over me being a freak and I'm pretty sure that Malfoy doesn't know just how close he is making Dad angry enough to do something drastic!'

Remus thought he knew what Harry was alluding to about drastic punishment – especially if the Malfoy boy had been warned several times against a certain behaviour and was still ignoring his head of house. He was more concerned with Harry's comment about being a freak, but all he said was: 'But if he's been warned, and he's still disobeying…?'

'Uncle Remus…' Harry sighed in frustration. 'You don't understand.'

But Remus rather thought he did understand, quite apart from feeling like a freak because of being a bit different, there was also the perennial school house rule: You don't tell on anyone – friend of foe. And if the person Harry told was his father… Yes, it hadn't been all that long since Remus had been at school.

'Alright.' He sighed, deciding to give in on that front for now. 'But what about the other Slytherins? And the rest?'

'Well…' Harry frowned, his face darkening from the relief he'd shown when Remus had given in about telling on Malfoy. 'Some of the kids are saying…' Harry lowered his head, looking dejected. 'Because of the Chamber… And Binns finally let it out that only the Heir of Slytherin could open it…'

'No!' Remus gasped.

'Yeah. The Muggle-borns are like scared of me, and some of the Slytherins who believe it think it's actually cool! I heard some of them saying I should switch houses…'

'They actually said that to you?!' Remus demanded in shock.

'Not… exactly…' Harry blushed.

'Harry Potter! Were you spying again?!'

'No!' Harry answered quickly, taking a quick glance back at his father to reassure that he hadn't heard. 'No, I wasn't spying or anything. Jeez – Dad's still peeved about the last time and I think he's taken my cloak back to the house anyway.'

Harry sighed, seeing the raised eyebrow of his uncle. 'I was taking a back way to come up here and some kids were walking past… and before I could step out to say anything, I overheard them talking…'

'Uh-huh…' Remus replied sceptically.

'Uncle Remus!'

'Alright…' Remus chuckled. 'Alright. Now…' He sobered slightly, returning to the previous topic. 'About the others being afraid: that's easy: Have you asked your Dad and Filius and Violet to maybe give their students the same books you left out for Gryffindor?'

Harry raised his eyebrows at that idea. 'Yeah… Maybe if they just let them out like I did… I wouldn't want them to say anything… And if I made it seem like it's just for curiosity – say nothing's happened or anything, but just so they'd have the information…'

'There you go!' Remus smiled. 'And as for this Heir of Slytherin nonsense… Well, all you can do is keep telling them what a ridiculous notion it is.'

'Fred and George keep joking about it. They right terrified some of the first years – especially until someone explained that they were just joking.'

At Remus' raised eyebrows and inquisitive look Harry smiled, chuckling slightly. 'They keep walking in front of me, telling everyone to clear a path for the Almighty Heir of Slytherin. And if anyone gets funny about it, they act all serious and say 'We ought to have known all along, I mean just look at him – First time I laid eyes on him I could tell he was obviously a dark wizard in the making. I mean anyone who would plait Hagrid's hair has got to be evil… well that, or seriously insane…

'Harry…' Remus frowned, not seeing the humour in joking about that.

'No really – I think it's funny. Especially considering the first time they laid eyes on me was when they got off the train their first day… I was on Hagrid's shoulders… plaiting his hair…' He grinned impishly. 'And anyway, it cheers me up to see them laughing about it. At least Fred and George think it's ridiculous – and some of the others are coming around. See…' Harry sat straighter, leaning in a bit. 'They see me laughing about it all right? And if I don't take it seriously…'

'He doth protest too much?' Remus smiled, knowing that Harry would catch the Shakespeare reference thanks to Severus' thorough education.

'Yeah,' Harry answered, nodding. 'If I went around getting upset every time it came up and freaking out and denying it over and over… This way, it's like I'm saying the whole idea is just so stupid that it's not even worth denying. Get it?'

'When did you get so clever?' Remus smiled at Harry's deep blush and muttered protest: 'Uncle Remus!'

'So,' Remus said after a moment. 'Are you going to ask your Dad and the other Heads to give those books to their students?'

'Yeah, that was a good idea Remus – Thanks… You're – uh – you're not going to tell Dad about Malfoy are you? Please Uncle Remus!?' he added when Remus frowned and hesitated.

'Alright -  For Now. But I want to hear from you again in a couple of days. And I want you to tell me Honestly if it's stopped by then.'

'Alright,' Harry agreed very reluctantly. 'But seriously Remus, it's no big deal… Alright, alright,' he acquiesced, putting his hands up in surrender at Remus' stern look. 'I'll call you on Saturday, how's that?'

'That's fine. But if it gets worse, I want you to tell your Dad. And, if I don't hear from you by three on Saturday I'll call him myself, got it?'

'Got it.' Harry smiled, standing up. 'Bye Uncle Remus. Thanks.'

*****************

'Dad?' Hearing Harry's voice as he broke the privacy spell covering his conversation with Remus, Severus looked up from his notes.

'Um…' Harry fidgeted slightly. 'The other day I left out a bunch of my parselmouth 'true-facts' books in the Gryffindor common room…' Severus merely raised an eyebrow at this statement causing Harry to fidget even more before going on. 'I think it helped them to understand better… anyway, a bunch of them have asked me questions… but no one really gave me a hard time…'

'Mm-hmm…' Severus prompted, waiting for him to continue.

'Well, I was thinking… maybe if I left the books in the other house common rooms… Well, maybe it'd help them too…'

'Has anyone else been 'giving you a hard time?' Severus asked, trying unsuccessfully to keep the urgency out of his voice.

'No… not really – it's just… I was thinking how laying out all the information made it easier for the Gryffindors to understand… and Remus said maybe doing the same thing for the other houses would… you know, make things easier for them too…'

'Who has been harassing you?' Severus repeated.

'Dad, seriously – I promise there's been nothing serious enough to mention. It's just some don't really understand. I mean, the only parselmouths anyone's really heard of are Slytherin and Voldemort – and all they hear about Slytherin really is the anti-Muggle stuff and with everyone on about the Chamber… and well, you know… Voldemort and all…'

Severus controlled his expression not to show any reaction to hearing that name – twice. He still hated to hear it, though he did agree with Dumbledore that fear of the name bred fear of the thing – and fearing Voldemort only increased the creature's power… He still found himself ridiculously proud of Harry for understanding that and refusing to back down by not speaking the name.

'It's a good idea,' he said at last. 'I'll speak with Vi and Filius. But Harry,' he added before Harry could change the subject. 'If anything happens – I don't care who you think, or know is behind it… I need to know.'

'Dad, I promise alright?' Harry sighed. 'There's really been nothing unexpected – and nothing threatening.'

'Harry…'

'If anything does happen though I promise to tell you. Sheesh…' Harry rolled his eyes. 'You and Remus really should get together you know? You both sure think alike sometimes.'

'Now there's no need to be insulting!' Severus mock growled.

'Dad and Remus, sitting in a tree, K – I - …'  Harry's sing-song was cut short by a sudden tickling hex thrown at him from Severus. 'No… Fair…!' Harry gasped between laughs.

'More than fair.' Severus smirked, levitating Harry to within arms reach for a playful swat on the backside. 'For talking nasty about your poor Dad.'

'Ahhhh!!' Harry laughed uncontrollably, trying to 'float' out of reach while covering his bum. 'It's Remus I was insulting! Eeeeee!!' he squealed as Severus renewed his 'assault'.