A/N- So, firstly, big thanks for all the supportive reviews and PMs. I'm really sorry if I don't get many chances to reply…It's nothing personal, I'm just currently worked off my feet. Now, without any further delay, I give you CHAPTER 8! (And, just a warning, it's a whopping 38 pages in Word…so pace yourselves if you must! LOL) And to those of you reading The Tension and The Spark, you'll be pleased to hear (read) that the next chapter is well underway, and will be up in a couple of weeks, uni permitting. (Grins)
Severus paced the length of his private study, a thousand thoughts swirling about in his head.
He felt as if the weight of the entire world had just landed on his shoulders.
How stupid he'd been! Making all sorts of outrageous promises to a child. A child, for Merlin's sake! And not just any child, but a child that had lied to him, time and time again. A child who had acted illegally against him, whether intentionally or no.
The child of his schoolyard archrival.
Certainly, the boy was going to allow him a right -a cosmic gift, if you will- that no soul before had...But did that warrant such ludicrous behaviour on his own part?
Of course not.
He'd been blinded by his surprise and, though he was loath to admit it, joy towards his impending fatherhood. So blinded, in fact, that he'd convinced himself that he actually cared for the other father; a mere teenager that he'd never even thought about touching...
And that had led him to make those incredibly humiliating declarations...To which there were absolutely no traces of truth...
And that was the case.
It was futile to think otherwise.
Come to think of it, he hadn't been thinking in the first place, and that was all there was to it.
End of story.
So, on that note, Severus pushed aside all other thoughts; in particular the nagging voice inside his head which told him he was making a rather large mistake.
-?-
"Mister Harry Potter, sir..."
Harry shot the elf a tear filled glance. "Yes, Kreeper?"
Kreeper hesitated. "Perhaps now is not being a good time...But we is finding this-" he extended a rather ticked off serpent towards the boy, "-in the kitchens. Binky, the kitchen elf, is telling Kreeper that she is being your birthday present. Kreeper is wishing Mister Harry Potter is telling him of the momentous occasion! We is making Mister Harry Potter a birthday feast!"
The Gryffindor attempted a watery smile, and extended his hand, in order for Snake to slide up his arm. "Thank you, but I don't need a feast." As if to contest, his stomach growled.
Kreeper frowned, taking in Harry's disheveled appearance, and blotchy, red eyes. "Is Master Severus being cruel to Mister Harry Potter?" He placed his withered hands onto his bony hips. "For, if Master Severus is not being nice to his guest, Kreeper will be having words with him."
Harry almost laughed at the elf's temper. He clearly thought he had the authority to put his 'Master' back in line.
"No, Professor Snape is not being cruel. I'm just not feeling well." He placed his hand on his stomach, thinking about how strange Severus' official title felt to say now. But, it was something he'd have to get used to, for another year at least.
The house elf appeared to buy his excuse without any problems, however became visibly upset for another reason altogether. "If you is being ill, Sir, you should be calling Kreeper! Kreeper is getting you medicines! Master is being a Potions Master!"
An invisible smile tugged at the corners of Harry's mouth, and he shook his head; a gesture of amusement and an attempt to ward off the house elf. "I will be fine without medicines...I promise." Kreeper eyed him skeptically, and he proffered another smile, in an effort to convince the creature. "If I need you, I'll call, I swear it."
He contemplated, idly, placing his hand across his chest, just above his heart, and swearing 'Wizard's Honour', but felt that the humour would be lost on the elf.
Kreeper frowned, but nodded. "If you is being certain..."
"I am."
"Alright, Mister Harry Potter, Sir." With a final nod, the house elf disapparated, leaving the troubled teenager alone to his thoughts once more.
After a moment, Harry sighed and pushed himself to his feet. He didn't understand why Severus had snapped as he did, but, deep down, he knew that moping about would earn him no points with the older man.
And then there was the fact that he had to be strong for the safety of his child...
It was decided, then. He was going to calm himself and get on with his life, whether Snape loved him or hated him -or both.
With a renewed sense of self, he made his way to his rooms, half-heartedly listening to Snake.
"Sssstupid elvesss...I am no threat...Your mate showed me to the kitchensssss to catch the rodentssss, and the brainlessss foolssss ssssspent all morning attempting to capture me."
Harry actually found his pet's indignation amusing, so remained silent, lest he insult the poor thing again.
Snake continued her -for that was what Kreeper had said Snake was- tirade. "It ssssseemed asssss though they'd never sssseen a sssssnake before..."
"I don't suppose they had, actually. Except for in the portraits." Harry found himself cutting in. "And, even then, most people -elves included- don't really...er...trust snakes." He hesitated. "See...snakes are...er...generally seen as dark creatures..."
"That isssss prepossssterousssss! We are no darker than the elvessss themsssselvesssss."
Harry's thoughts flickered, angrily, to Kreacher, Sirius' evil elf, but he squashed the memories before they could go any further. He didn't need another surge of raw emotion...
"I know that, Snake." He let himself into his rooms, pausing, briefly, to think that he would no longer be able to call them such. He swallowed and continued his conversation. "But there were some wizards -dark wizards- that used serpents for dark magic...For torturing innocent people. So much so that the stigma still lingers today."
Now, if only I could write essays for History of Magic this well...
Snake slithered down his arms, and across his torso, before slinking down his leg and onto the floor.
"Will your acquaintancsesssss assssume we are dark?"
"We?"
"A wizsssard who assssociatesssss with ssssserpentssss is also viewed assss a dark sssssoul, isssss he not?"
She had a point. "Er...well...yeah, I s'pose..."
Snake looked at him expectantly.
He sighed, and dropped down onto his bed.
"Some people might, yeah. But most of the kids at school know me…and they know that I can talk to snakes…So, the fact that I own-" Snake hissed, clearly insulted, and he back-peddled immediately. "-er…I mean, associate with one shouldn't worry many people."
"But ssssssome will assssume you are of the dark."
Harry smiled tiredly. "You can't please everyone, I'm afraid. And if people want to believe that, it's their business, really. I've got other things to worry about."
"Aah," Snake nodded her shiny head, as she wound her way around a leg of the large oak four-poster, "Sssuch assss your offssssspring and mate."
The raven-haired teenager nodded, reaching out, on impulse, to stroke the area underneath Snake's chin…that was, of course, if snakes even had chins...
"Yeah, something like that…"
-?-
As the sun began to sink down behind the distant hills, and the sky lit up in the peaceful hues of pink and yellow, Harry followed Severus in silence, dragging his trunk in the air behind him.
He'd packed his belongings, allowing Snake's blathering to distract him from his miserable thoughts, and had left his trunk at the base of the stairs once he was done, as a message to Snape that he was more than prepared to leave.
And so it was that, as dusk began to settle, Harry was standing outside Snape Manor, watching his Potions Master reset the estate's wards.
"Where are we travelling?" Snake hissed into his ear. It tickled.
Smiling at the sensation, he gestured towards the emblem on his trunk. "Hogwarts. My school. We'll be there a while."
Severus turned to watch the exchange. The parseltongue language had always intrigued him.
"Will there be many mice?" She lingered, as usual, on the 'sss' of 'mice'. It made Harry grin.
Though Snake's words were nothing more than hissing sounds to him, Severus could see that the serpent had amused its owner.
Harry was smiling, and the combination of his happiness, and the light of the setting sun behind him, seemed to give him a healthy glow. He continued to talk to the serpent, unaware of Severus' keen gaze.
Snape withheld a sigh.
He wouldn't allow himself any feelings for the young man. Once the boy had graduated, and had entered the real world, he would soon realise that his feelings for his Potions Master had been nothing but a schoolboy crush. Whether they were connected by their daughter or not, Harry would discover that he could do much better than the older Slytherin. And he would laugh, at some point, about his folly.
After all, he was everything that Snape was not.
He was still such an innocent…Still so pure, as Severus had openly admitted that morning.
After thinking about what he had meant by his own comment, he had convinced himself that he was insane to even consider the notion that they might someday be an item.
He'd committed acts that had caused even the wicked Dark Lord to shudder. His soul would forever be tainted, whereas Harry's would always shimmer with innocence.
And what of his numerous -and rather dubious- sexual partners? What of the revels? Though he knew he was free of disease, Severus felt as though he would always be dirty. And Harry, despite his and Draco's illegal tryst, would forever remain clean.
Harry, Severus had decided, deserved to lead a much more promising existence than one where he remained tethered to his greasy Professor.
And, now that he watched the teenager, Severus knew that he'd made the correct decision.
He had to leave the boy alone.
Harry deserved much more than he could give.
Sensing the older man's gaze, the Gryffindor turned and offered Severus a shaky smile. "All done?" He asked, hoping that his tone didn't betray him. He didn't want to leave. He wanted to stay on at the Manor, and get to know the real Severus more. But, sadly, it was not to be, and he'd be damned if he showed the man any weaknesses now, especially after Snape's abrupt change of heart that morning.
Severus nodded, and magically shrunk their luggage, pocketing both Harry's trunk, and his own. He extended his arms, ignoring the voice in his head that told him to relish the moment. After all, it would be the last time he would hold Harry in his arms. Not that it should mean anything to him, though. He couldn't afford to remain emotionally attached to the brat.
Harry bit back tears as he stood in Severus' embrace, knowing, instinctively, that it would be a long while before they could share a similar moment again.
I have to be strong.
He repeated his mantra in his head, hoping to calm himself.
I have to be strong.
He closed his eyes, and waited for the strange swirling sensation to overwhelm him.
When he next opened his eyes, he was in Hogsmeade.
Severus let him go.
I have to be strong.
-?-
Nestled in his bed in Gryffindor tower that night, Harry couldn't help but feel lonely, and the harshness of the stone walls did nothing to appease his anxiety.
He thought longingly of the comforting cherry wood panelling that adorned the walls of his rooms in Snape Manor. He'd never -not even when Severus was upset with him- felt lonely there.
But here, in the darkened tower of Gryffindor, he felt isolated. The silence was almost deafening. And he couldn't draw his curtains around his bed, as they only increased the feelings of claustrophobia.
He had to get out of there.
Swinging his legs over the side of his bed, he fumbled for his slippers and glasses.
"Where are you going?"
He turned to face Snake, who was curled up on a large cushion on the ground beside his bed.
"A walk," he replied. "Can't sleep."
"Then I mussst join you," she said, matter-of-factly, uncoiling herself. "For your ssssafety."
He rolled his eyes, but allowed her to slink up his arm anyway.
At least he wouldn't feel quite so lonely…
He exited through the portrait hole, ignoring the Fat Lady's protests, and made his way down the hall, wondering, idly, where he should go.
His stomach gurgled, and he smirked. There was his answer, then. He'd go to the kitchens.
Turning down a familiar corridor, he hesitated at the sound of approaching footsteps. Realising that he hadn't retrieved his invisibility cloak, he suddenly felt foolish.
But, really, he had no reason to worry. After all, he didn't have a curfew, as it was the holidays, and the halls of Hogwarts were definitely safe to travel now, especially with the threat of Voldemort gone.
So he was not about to get into any trouble, and he definitely wasn't risking any house-points.
The footsteps neared, and he shook himself from his stupor.
It was alright. Nobody would mind that he was heading off for a midnight snack.
He started moving, and turned the next corner, only to walk directly into the other hall-wanderer.
"Potter!" Snape's voice exclaimed, causing Harry to jolt.
He looked up into the other man's eyes. "Sev-" He sighed, knowing that he no longer held that privilege. "Professor." He lowered his gaze, not wanting the other man to see his pain.
"Just what do you think you are doing lurking the corridors at night?"
Harry rubbed absentmindedly at his stomach. "I was hungry, Sir. Couldn't sleep."
Severus eyed him sceptically. "And you couldn't have summoned a house-elf? Or does logic escape you?"
"I…" He looked up, wanting nothing more than to throw himself into Severus' arms and confess that he was lonely, and just a little scared. But his pride prevented him from doing anything of the sort. He sighed. "The latter, Sir. I just didn't think."
"A feat you have yet to accomplish," Severus drawled in response, extracting his wand. With a swish, and a muttered spell, he summoned an elf.
"How is Dobby being of service to Professor Snape tonight?" The familiar creature asked, waiting patiently for the Potions Master's response.
"Mister Potter requires yet another meal." Snape gestured to the boy in question. "And see to it that he is escorted back to his dormitory. He is not to wander the halls at night, holidays or no."
Dobby turned to face Harry, a gleeful smile spreading across his weathered face. "Harry Potter!" He exclaimed in awe, throwing his arms around the teenager's thighs, "Dobby is not knowing that you is back at Hogwarts early! If Dobby is knowing, Dobby is visiting sooner! Oh, you is being very naughty, Harry Potter, for not telling Dobby!"
Snape rolled his eyes at the exchange. Brilliant. He just had to summon a house-elf that worshipped the brat.
Harry, meanwhile, shot his Professor a dirty look. "I was about to, Dobby, before Professor Snape kindly summoned you."
Ah, sarcasm, Severus thought to himself, the lowest form of wit.
Pity he used it so often himself...
"Well Dobby will be bringing Harry Potter food!" His big ears flapped about as he nodded enthusiastically, "And Dobby will bring it to Harry Potter's dormitory, like Professor Snape is asking." He cocked his wrinkly head to the side, observing Harry closely. "You is looking healthier, Harry Potter. You is eating more!" He beamed, gesturing to the swell of Harry's stomach. "What is you wanting to eat tonight?"
Feeling somewhat self-conscious, Harry smiled, and licked his lips. "Er...Can I have a chocolate éclair?" He asked, his mouth watering, "And some warm milk, with a bit of honey?" Hopefully he'd get to sleep that way.
"Of course," Dobby said, snapping his fingers. He disappeared, then reappeared moments later, a small tray of food clutched in his odd little hands.
"We is going back to Harry Potter's dormitory now," he informed the wizards, before strutting back in the direction from which Harry had only just come.
The Gryffindor glanced back at his Potions Professor. "Thank you, Sir." He said, surprising even himself with the tone of genuine appreciation. "Good night."
He turned and sped after Dobby, leaving a puzzled Severus Snape in his wake.
-?-
The next three weeks passed without further incident. Harry had avoided Severus at all costs, and had the feeling that Severus had gone to similar lengths to avoid him. Not that it had been difficult, really, with Snape barricading himself in his office all day of every day.
But now Harry found himself pacing outside the door to the man's personal chambers.
He knocked lightly on the wood, having gathered all his courage.
It faltered when Severus' voice snapped 'Enter, Potter'.
He opened the door cautiously, not particularly wanting to deal with a brassed-off Snape.
"Contrary to what most people believe, I do not bite, boy."
The voice came from one of the leather recliners by the fireplace.
Harry stepped into the room, savouring the familiarity. Though he'd never been in Snape's actual chambers before, they reminded him of Snape Manor, and the sitting room here particularly reminded him of the library.
"I'm sorry for intruding, Sir, but..." he trailed off, wondering whether this was even worth the while.
Severus shifted in his seat, and looked at the younger wizard. "But?" He prompted.
Harry swallowed. "I...er...I've another appointment with M'me Pomfrey, and I thought...that is to say, I wondered whether you might want to...er...join me?"
He closed his eyes, preparing himself for the worst.
Severus observed him, and weighed up his options.
If he were to agree, Harry might assume that he was still interested in forming a relationship. However, on the other hand, if he declined, it would look as though he wanted nothing to do with his child...that he wasn't interested...and he definitely wasn't willing to give up his rights that easily.
"I will accompany you," he eventually replied, feeling the urge to smirk at the boy's look of surprise, "However-" here, Harry's smile faltered "-it is strictly out of interest for my daughter. I will not have you harbouring any ill-conceived notions that I might possibly be interested in pursuing a relationship with you."
Ill-conceived?
Harry felt rage bubble up within him.
"With all due respect, Sir," he hissed, narrowing his eyes, "The only notions that I harbour are those that you put into my head when you said that you cared! When you told me you'd wait!"
Severus winced. He knew that his own words would return to bite him in the rear sooner or later.
"Potter," he began, attempting to control his temper, "You cannot honestly believe that a relationship-" he shuddered as he said it "-between us would actually work." He twisted his expression into a sneer, "Think about it, Potter. I was in shock to learn of my involvement.So much so that I had convinced myself that promising myself to you was the right thing to do. Naturally, I came to my senses. I suggest that you do the same."
Harry gaped. That wasn't true! It couldn't be! Severus Snape would never act so irrationally! There was clearly more to the situation than met the eye.
"Fine." Harry heard himself respond. "I don't give a rat's arse whether we're to be together or not." He felt slightly better to see a glimmer of surprise and regret in the older wizard's eyes.
Good. Serves the old bastard right.
He ploughed on, placing a deliberate hand on his belly for dramatic emphasis. "But I do care about her." He glared into obsidian orbs. "You can't leap in and out of her life. You're either going to be there for her, or you're not. It's simple." He strode to the door, tilting his head back to deliver his parting shot. "You can play about with my emotions, Severus Snape, but I'll be damned if I let you even attempt to do the same with hers."
He slammed the door on his way out, not caring that Severus was staring after him.
-?-
Harry was still seething when he went to his appointment.
"Stupid git," he hissed to himself. "Just who does he think he is?"
"Is everything alright, dear?"
Poppy's voice caused him to jump. He blushed.
"Er..."
Looking into her eyes, he knew he couldn't lie. Averting his gaze, he started to speak.
"No, actually it's not."
"Oh?" She led him towards his usual hospital bed. "What's troubling you?" She lifted his shirt, and smiled at his rounded stomach; he was coming along perfectly. "It's not the child, is it, my dear?"
He sighed and shook his head. "Not exactly..." She arched an eyebrow, prompting him to clarify. His cheeks were crimson. "I explained everything to Professor Snape." He felt his throat constrict, and forced himself to remain calm.
Madame Pomfrey, knowing how volatileSeverus could be, placed a sympathetic hand on his shoulder.
The young man was still speaking; spilling out his heart to whomever would listen.
"...I mean, he was actually pleased, you know? He was happy he was going to be a father...And...well...he wasn't upset with me at all..."
This came as a surprise to the Mediwitch. "However?" She asked, wondering what had upset the boy so, if it hadn't been the Professor.
Harry took a deep breath. "Then he...changed his mind." Poppy looked horrified, and he scurried to explain himself. "Not about the baby!" His blush deepened, "A…about me."
She glowered. "I beg your pardon?"
"Oh! No, I didn't mean...Well, yeah, in a way...but, see, it's more complicated. He...he said he wanted to wait for me...sort of make a real 'family' after I graduate..." As he spoke, his eyes lit up, and he smiled, enjoying the elaborate imagination. But his face fell when reality crashed back down upon him. "But...he changed his mind...And I don't mind that he's hurt me...but I don't want him to hurt her..." His gaze turned steely. "I'll kill him if he hurts her."
Poppy had the impression that Harry was telling the truth. It was amazing the way maternal instincts could manipulate a person; and a male person at that!
She patted his shoulder in a motherly fashion. "There there, deary..." She soothed, moving to pat down his fringe. "Severus has just had a bit of a shock...But if I know the lad-" and she thought she did, "-he will come around in time. When someone matters to him...well, the poor soul keeps it to himself...but he does care. Your daughter will know it, Harry, I assure you."
Harry was sceptical, but nodded anyway. He felt somewhat better, having spoken to someone about his troubles, though it still hurt to think of Severus' harsh words that morning.
As if on cue, the man himself stalked through the doors, and took his customary place to Harry's side, acting for all the world as if nothing awkward had occurred between them.
"Good afternoon, Severus," Poppy greeted him, shooting her patient an unreadable look. She met his dark eyes. "Harry tells me that you've learnt the truth."
He glanced down at the teenager in question, who made a good show of inspecting his fingernails, obviously desperate to avoid meeting his gaze. With a small smirk tugging at the corner of his lips, he turned his attention back to the Mediwitch, who was clearly expecting some sort of response. "Indeed," he tilted his head slightly, "And, despite the fact that it is none of your business, I assure you that it was a welcomed surprise, and I intend to play a strong role in her life." He looked, pointedly, at Harry. "Which may come as a surprise to some."
Poppy smiled at him. "Excellent news, Severus." She exclaimed, a little too enthusiastically. "I expected nothing less."
Snape, having been privileged enough to witness Harry's memories concerning his meetings with the Mediwitch, merely forced a small smile. "Indeed."
The atmosphere between the three grew tense, so, after a few minutes, Harry sighed and took it upon himself to break the awkward silence.
"Well..." He began uncertainly, clapping his hands together, "Are we going to get on with this or not?" He looked towards Poppy.
"Oh, of course, Harry, dear. Of course." She muttered, remembering herself, and bustled about, retrieving various implements -most of which Harry had become quite familiar with, much to his discomfort.
She returned to his side, smiling in -what he assumed was- 'reassurance'.
"Just relax, Harry," She instructed, waving her wand above his abdomen.
The hologram appeared above the wand's tip, as usual, and Poppy beamed across at them.
"Everything is just as it should be." She looked down at her patient. "Have you felt her moving yet?"
Harry shook his head. Madame Pomfrey smiled on.
"Not to worry. Any day now."
Harry forced a smile. If he were to be completely honest, he'd admit that he wasn't actually looking forward to that aspect of pregnancy. It scared him, actually. He'd seen enough of Dudley's horror movies -having peeked through keyholes and windows- to expect that it would be awkward -and painfull- to have another living creature under his skin, moving within him. He thought of Alien -one of Dudley's favourites- and shuddered.
Though Poppy missed the quiver of the young man's shoulders, Severus did not.
What was bothering the boy? Surely, if he were queasy, or anxious, he would confront the Mediwitch.
He watched Harry intently for the duration of the appointment, but found no obvious cause for the boy's discomfort.
As they exited the wing, he thought, for a brief moment, that he should ask Harry outright. After all, he would have done so, if they were still at the Manor.
If they were still friends.
But that had changed, and they were no longer on easy speaking terms. Thus, it was less complicated if he remained unattached. If he remained cold, cruel and distanced. No more damage could be done that way.
Harry's real friends -the ones his own age- would return to the school in a week, and then the world would return to normal. Harry would forget all about his fleeting acquaintance with his Professor, and Severus would return to his realm of quiet nights spent alone in front of a fire, a snifter of brandy in one hand and a good book in the other.
So it was, then, that he chose not to question the boy, and merely bid him 'good day'.
Yes, he thought as he stalked back to his rooms, it was less complicated this way.
-?-
Back in his dormitory, Harry found Pig waiting for him, a letter tethered to his leg. It was from Ron, wondering if he might like to spend the last week of the holidays at The Burrow. Harry grinned to himself. That was exactly what he needed. One last hurrah with the Weasleys before his world turned upside down for good.
Before he became a parent.
He scrawled a quick reply to his best friend, pleased that Molly had already contacted Dumbledore for permission, and sent Pig off immediately.
He rushed about, filling a backpack -yet another of Dudley's seconds- with various clothes and knickknacks, woke Snake from her nap, and then made his way to the Castle's entrance, where a thestral-drawn carriage would soon arrive to take him to Hogsmeade.
Once in the village, he summoned the Knight Bus, and paid for his ticket and hot chocolate, vaguely pleased to see Stan again.
" 'Choo bin up to, 'arry?" The lanky conductor asked as he handed the Boy-Who-Lived his ticket. " 'Aven't 'eard abou'choo in the papers no more."
Harry shrugged. "School, actually. And relaxing." He smiled, "No more fighting or anything. It's been good."
Stan laughed, and conjured the warm drink. He leant forward, conspiratorially. "Put in an extra marshmallow for ya," he whispered. "No extra cost or nuffin'."
"Thanks." Harry accepted the mug and drank up with relish. It tasted like heaven…if heaven had a taste, that was.
"No problems, 'arry."
The rest of the journey was filled with inane chatter about Hogwarts, assignments and detentions, and left Harry feeling light-hearted and untroubled when he finally got off at The Burrow.
"See ya 'arry." Stan chortled as the bus disappeared with a 'bang'.
Ron was waiting at the gate. "Harry, mate, brilliant that you could come!" He strode forward and enveloped his best friend in a manly hug. "Hols haven't been the same without your visit."
The raven-haired teenager nodded. "I know. It's good to be back."
"You look good." Ron said, before rethinking his phrasing. "I mean…you look healthy. I wasn't…y'know…" He blushed, and Harry laughed.
"Yeah, I know. And thanks." He gestured towards his middle. "I'm starting to show a bit, though…"
"Like I said, you look healthy. Not much else, yet." Ron paused, "Mum'll still be able to tell, though."
The other boy's face fell. "Oh…"
"Well, you were goin' to have to tell everyone sooner or later…and, anyway, 'Mione and I are here, so-"
"Hermione's here?"
"Yeah," the redhead was blushing again, "She's cookin' with mum and Ginny at the moment…Give us a bit of time to catch up an' all."
Harry eyed his best friend critically. There was something else. Something he hadn't been told. Then it hit him, and it stung like a slap in the face.
"You've shagged her!"
Ron's eyes widened and he lunged forward to cover Harry's mouth. "Shuuuushhh!" He cried, his cheeks redder than Harry had ever seen them. Pulling his hand away, he looked to the ground, and scuffed the toe of his shoe in the dust. "Mum'll kill me if she finds out." He turned pleading eyes back to his friend. "I mean…she knows we're together…but if she thought for a second that-"
"-I get it, Ron. She'd never leave you alone again." He grinned wickedly. "At least, not 'til after the wedding." He laughed at the horrified look on the other's face. "C'mon…I'm starving…"
They trudged to the house, catching up on the basics of each others' holidays. Harry was a little miffed that Ron and Hermione had been seeing each other since his birthday, when neither had bothered to tell him, but he was still relatively pleased that they were happy.
But, as they neared the front door, Harry began to feel anxious. What if the Weasleys didn't approve of his condition? He knew they had no qualms about his sexuality…but this was a whole new step altogether. He was pregnant. Illegally pregnant to his Potions Professor. And he was only seventeen. And alone. And he knew he was like a child to Molly and Arthur…so how would they take the news?
"You alright, mate?" Ron asked, catching the worried look on his face.
He nodded. "No." Wait, that wasn't right. He shook his head. "Yes." Hang on a tic…He sighed. "I don't know."
His friend squeezed his shoulder reassuringly. "It'll be over before you know it. They care about you, no matter what, remember?"
Harry wasn't so sure, but swallowed the knot in his throat and nodded anyway.
They entered the house, and Ron bellowed out to the others, to let them know that their guest had arrived safely. Harry fought the urge to hit him.
Suddenly, it was a mistake to have come. He didn't want them to know he was there. He didn't want to have to explain himself. He didn't want to watch Ron and Hermione canoodling. He just wanted to leave. To go back to Snape Manor, where he was comfortable, and happy. Where he had Severus' trust and friendship. Not here, where he was an outsider.
"Harry!" Hermione was the first to greet them, and she flung her arms around his neck, and kissed his cheek. "Oh, it's so good to see you! And you're looking healthy! Good. You've been taking care of yourself. I'm so pleased!"
He hugged her back, feeling a little bit of the tension that had built up inside him melt away.
"It's good to see you, too." He replied, smiling as she pulled away. "Ron admitted to the new development between the two of you, as well." He nudged her playfully.
She grinned. "Good. I didn't like thinking you were out of the loop. It's not right."
Harry was about to respond, but found himself cut off by Molly's loud greeting. "Harry, dear!" She exclaimed, bustling forward, her arms extended. "Come give us a hug, then."
He was certain that he looked mortified as she closed in, and gave her an awkward hug, praying that she wouldn't press against his belly, and discover his condition immediately.
She pulled away, an odd look on her face. He hoped she was simply confused about his strange embrace. "Let's get a good look at you, then." She said, stepping back to take the sight of him in.
The odd look on her face morphed into a scowl, and he knew the gig was up. "HARRY POTTER!" She cried, her face turning an odd shade of red. He winced. "I'D HAVE THOUGHT YOU'D HAVE HAD MORE SENSE!"
At the sound of her cry, the other Weasleys -Bill included (he must have been visiting for tea again)- rushed in to see what was going on. This was not how Harry had wanted to tell them. Especially Bill. He hadn't been joking when he'd told Ron that his brother was a good kisser. In fact, he was rather skilled in a lot of areas. And, though their fling had been short, he'd cared a great deal about Bill Weasley. And it wasn't fair that he was about to have the evidence of his more recent sexual relationship flashed about in front of his ex-lover's face. It wasn't fair on Bill, and it certainly wasn't fair on him.
"Molly," Harry tried to placate her, "Mrs Weasley, please-"
"-Just what is going on here?" That was Arthur. He was, unsurprisingly, ignored.
"-I am VERY disappointed with you, Harry!"
"Mum!" This time it was Ron. "Harry's been through a fair bit…"
He too was ignored.
Harry was still attempting to explain himself. "I know, but I didn't know I could-"
"THAT is no excuse! You shouldn't have been in that position to begin with! You're too young! FAR too young!"
For an instant, Harry longed to tell her that it was none of her business, but, if she really must know, it was one of her eldest sons that had first taken him. When he'd been much younger. And that it had been one of the most enjoyable experiences of his life. That it had continued on between he and Bill for months. And, worst of all, that she was in no position to lecture him because she was not his mother. Because she'd never be his mother.
But he held his tongue, knowing that it was his anger talking, and that she was the best mother figure he could have ever asked for.
He was close to tears, but still tried to calm her. "Please, I didn't…It's hard enough doing this alone without being yelled at by the only family I've known…"
She paused, as if considering this, and then softened. "I'm still disappointed, Harry."
"I know." He averted his gaze. "I don't blame you."
"Can someone please explain all this?"
Harry glanced at Mr. Weasley, and opened his mouth to tell him that now was not the time. That he and Molly would all sit down and talk about it in private. But Mrs Weasley had other ideas.
"He's pregnant, Arthur."
There was a collective gasp, and Harry winced.
It was going to be yet another long night.
-?-
"Who's the lucky guy, then?"
Harry was sitting alone under a tree in the backyard, playing with the grass. He'd had to explain himself -as best he could- to Molly and Arthur earlier that evening. Meanwhile, Fred, George and Ginny received the run down from Hermione and Ron. To his knowledge, Bill hadn't participated in either conversation.
Harry jumped at the sound of his ex-lover's voice.
Green eyes met blue. "It's hard to explain, actually."
"Go on." Bill sat down at his side.
He sighed. "Long story short; it's Severus Snape's…but he…er…well…he didn't exactly have anything to do with it."
Bill gave no sign of surprise, or revulsion. He merely looked out across the grounds. "Now the slightly longer version?"
"Draco…Er…Malfoy polyjuiced himself to look like Snape…and used a really strong advancement serum…and then we…well…we conceived. And, apparently, because of the serum, he was all Snape…But I didn't know I could conceive in the first place…so I thought I only had the flu or something…and then, well, M'me Pomfrey proved otherwise."
"Ah."
Was that it? 'Ah'? Just 'ah'?
Shouldn't Bill react a little more violently than that? Shouldn't he be upset? Or angry?
Harry felt cheated.
An awkward silence fell between them, only to be broken by the increasingly irritating question: "Does Severus know?"
Harry turned to meet Bill's gaze. "Yeah. He's actually pleased, if you can believe it. Wants children. Wasn't too happy with me, though. Can't blame him."
"And Malfoy?"
"What? Does he know?"
"That…and what's Severus' current impression of him?"
"Yeah, Draco knows…But," the younger wizard hesitated. "I'm not actually sure what Severus thinks of him at the moment. Can't be too impressed…I mean, it was all Draco's idea…the polyjuicing stuff, I mean…" At Bill's move to protest, he added; "Not that it's any excuse on my part. But if I'm in the wrong for going along with it -and I am- Draco definitely is."
Bill nodded, and the silence overwhelmed them again.
This time it was Harry who broke it. "You know…Sometimes I stop and think about how lucky you and I were not to fall into this situation…"
"Oh?" The redhead arched an eyebrow.
Harry felt his cheeks grow red. "I mean…I loved you…I still do, but not like that, if you know what I mean…" He ploughed on, "But if I'd known that I could conceive…"
"You wouldn't have given yourself up so easily?" Bill sounded slightly put-out, and Harry rushed to better explain himself.
"No!" He exclaimed, willing the tears away. "I just…I might have been a bit more careful, you know? Like spells or Muggle prophylactics or something. I'm too young to be pregnant now…but back then? Merlin…it bothers me that we got away with it every time." And there had been many 'close shaves', come to think of it. "We were lucky."
Bill offered a small smile. "Perhaps it was more Fate than Luck, Harry." He rose to his feet. "The universe was against 'us' from the beginning." He was, of course, referring to the many problems in their relationship; the majority of which had lead to their ultimate demise as a couple. "This is simply confirmation." Another smile, brighter than the last, graced Bill's lips. "Congratulations, though. The timing may be disappointing, but pregnancy suits you. And there's no doubt that parenthood will."
Harry felt his cheeks burn. "Thanks. I think…I think I really needed to hear that. From you, I mean."
Bill extended his hand, helping Harry stand. He leant forward and placed a small, chaste kiss on the teenager's lips. Drawing back with a smile, he ruffled Harry's hair affectionately. "Don't mention it, Potter. After all, that's what friends are for."
Harry laughed at the cliché, and felt a small pang of regret that they hadn't worked out. Bill really was rather good looking…and such a sweet man, too. But there had been too many ill-contributing factors -none controllable by either man- and the risks had been too great.
And now…Now he was over Bill. He still loved him, but he was in love with Severus.
As if to punctuate the sentiment, he felt their daughter move for the first time, and was surprised, mildly, by how natural it was. There was no pain, and it didn't feel as though some strange creature was lurking beneath his skin. Instead it was odd…but comforting…like butterflies of a reassuring kind.
There were no words that could describe the serenity that overtook him at the flutter in his stomach, nor could he begin to explain the bond that seemed to instantly develop between himself and the baby….
But he liked the sensation, and hoped that the next time she moved, Severus would also be around to experience the moment, whether he wanted to hate him or not.
-?-
Before Harry knew it, school had started, and he tried to get used to sharing his bedroom with four other boys again. Though their number had decreased by one, thanks to Ron's status as Head Boy, Harry felt that there were too many people sharing his space. He'd become spoilt over the holidays, having been able to dress with ease, safe in the knowledge that nobody was watching. He was able to shower and bathe, glad that nobody could see his baby-bump, and start spreading rumours.
But now, back in the crowded dormitory, things were more difficult. He had to force himself up before the crack of dawn, so that none of the other boys discovered his secret. He knew he'd have to come clean at some point, but he was afraid of the media backlash. He didn't need to receive hundreds of howlers, each expressing Mrs Weasley's initial reaction.
Certainly, the Weasleys were all rather pleased now; they saw his daughter as a new addition to their brood, and for this Harry was happy, because she would need all the love in the world. He'd known what it was to grow up without family, without love and care, and he was resolved to provide the opposite to his little girl.
But what would the rest of the Wizarding world think? Not all were impressed with his sexuality -some were as narrow-minded as the homophobic Muggles- and he knew that many wizards still believed that sexual relations were to be reserved until after a wedding or bonding.
And that left Harry a bit out of the 'norm' on both accounts, for he wasn't even certain that two male wizards could legally marry or bond.
Not that it mattered. He'd always been the odd one in a crowd.
He just didn't want the negative publicity to affect his daughter. Merlin only knew how he'd despised it.
"Oi, Harry!" Seamus' voice cut into his musings, "Come play explodin' Snape?"
Harry frowned to himself. The twins would be in so much trouble the next time he spoke to them. "Nah, thanks anyway." He managed. "I've still got History of Magic stuff to do."
"Another time then." The Irish boy replied, before racing out of the room.
He was glad, at least, that Seamus hadn't chosen to tease him about his 'feelings' for Snape, as almost every other student had upon declining their offer to play the game. But then, Seamus had always been a good friend.
But none as good as Severus, his mind added. He scowled, feeling slightly traitorous to Hermione and Ron. Although, they'd been too busy making good use of Ron's private 'Head Boy' rooms.
And that had been one of the biggest surprises so far. That Hermione had missed her 'Head Girl' position. It fell, instead, to a practically anonymous Hufflepuff who had, apparently, been equally intelligent as Gryffindor's resident know-it-all…she just never got into as much trouble as Hermione. Or, at least, that was the reasoning that Harry thought Dumbledore might have used.
Either way, Hermione didn't seem too upset. She was still prefect, she had more time to do her schoolwork, and then spend time with Ron.
They just sacrificed a little 'Harry-time' to achieve their privacy.
And, really, he couldn't blame them, no matter how depressed he became. He'd done the same to them when he and Draco had mucked around. The only difference he could see was that he knew that Hermione had more sense than to let Ron impregnate her and turn everything upside down.
With a sigh, he rubbed his belly.
She was growing, he could tell, and soon everyone else would be able to, as well.
And he had yet to isolate a name for her. To say 'I like so-and-so' or 'this name sounds nice'. He continued to put it off, and the only excuse he was ever able to form was that Severus deserved his say.
But, at almost 6 months gone, he'd not had a chance to discuss such matters with the Potions Master.
"I'll just take drastic measures, then." He said to himself, eyeing his potions essay.
-?-
Severus watched the class file out, each 7th year -including Hermione Granger- seemed anxious to leave. Obviously, he'd been a little more snide than usual. And probably much more cruel.
"Potter," he drawled, watching as the last few people left the room, "You are to stay behind."
Granger, he noticed, shot the boy an apologetic look, before fleeing off to her next class. Harry, he knew, had a spare lesson next, which coincided with his own break.
Slamming the door shut, he gestured towards his office. "In."
Harry obeyed in silence.
Watching the younger wizard trudge into the smaller, more private room, Severus couldn't help but note the dark circles forming under his eyes, and the sickly tint to his skin. He was not getting nearly enough rest. And that worried him.
"Sit." He commanded, and again the boy complied.
The Professor brandished Harry's most recent assignment. "Care to explain?" He asked, eyeing the boy carefully.
Harry offered him a small smile. "I wanted to speak to you. That-" he gestured at the parchment, where some rather spiteful comments had been scrawled, "-was to get your attention."
Severus quirked an eyebrow. "And a simple 'we need to speak' was too difficult for you to write?"
"You'd have ignored it."
"Would I?"
Green eyes, lacking their usual lustre, met vaguely concerned obsidian. "Probably."
The older wizard sighed. "What was so important?"
"She needs a name."
"She? She who, Potter?"
Harry blinked back at him, incredulous. "Our baby."
Then it struck him. He'd suspended the knowledge, believing that it would only cause him grief. "Oh," he was taken by surprise for only a moment, "Naturally."
Here, the younger wizard smiled a little more. "I just thought…well…You deserve to have some say in it, don't you? I…I'd like it if you did."
Severus nodded. "Indeed. I will give it some thought, and forward my suggestions at some point in the near future." He waited a beat. "Was that all?"
Harry wanted to tell him that it was. That everything else was perfect. That school was working out just as well as he'd hoped, and that his life was bordering on 'normal'. But found, when he opened his mouth to speak, that he couldn't.
He missed Severus Snape, the friend. The confidante. He didn't care if they'd never work as a couple…but he longed to be able to discuss things with the older man. To be able to talk about his day, and about his problems, and have a few laughs over a number of butterbeers. And so he told the older wizard just that.
He felt the weight of the last two months lifting with each word he spoke.
He told Severus about his initial fears of being left alone in the dorms, and now his wishes that all the other boys would leave. He explained, tearfully, about his fears about news of his pregnancy getting out before he was ready, and of his newfound need to rise before the sun, just to ensure his daughter's safety. He described, to the best of his ability, what it felt like when she moved inside him.
He then begged Severus to continue being his friend, because he had nobody else. Because he didn't feel as close to the others as he once might have. Because he loved him, and no, not just on a 'relationship' level, but as a friend. As someone he'd grown to care about on many levels. As someone he'd learnt to trust and enjoy his time with. And it was hurting him that he no longer had anyone to experience that with, and he didn't know how Severus did it everyday, and that he wished he was stronger, but knew that he wasn't. And he knew that, no matter what, he needed Severus in his life, one way or another.
And, at the end of his rant, he took a deep breath, and collapsed against the back of his chair, feeling somewhat better that he'd gotten all that off his chest.
Severus' heart, however, was feeling a damn sight heavier.
-?-
Hermione and Ron snuggled together under the plush blanket. He idly toyed with a loose strand of her hair. It was a Hogsmeade weekend, just before Halloween, and the two had elected to stay behind, and enjoy each other's company. So far, they'd discussed classwork, reminisced over years gone by, and wound up in bed. Utterly spent, and extremely sated, they'd collapsed into each other's arms, and this was how they'd remained, in comfortable silence, for the best portion of an hour.
"D'you think he's alright?" Hermione eventually slurred, nuzzling further into Ron's shoulder.
"Hmm?"
"Harry." She clarified. "Do you think he's alright?"
Ron opened his eyes lazily. "Harry? Yeah, I s'pose..." He yawned, before grinning down at her. "Wha'choo doin' thinkin' of him just now, after what we just did?" His grin morphed into a teasing smirk. "You weren't thinkin' about him while we-"
"Ron!" She cried indignantly, slapping his bare chest. "I'm seriously worried about him."
Ron schooled his features into a serious resolve. "Sorry, 'Mione." He twirled her hair between his fingers, marvelling at its softness. "I reckon he's 'right. He's a strong one."
Hermione sighed, and pushed herself up into a sitting position. "But is he strong enough to cope with everything on his own? His body's changing...becoming foreign to him more and more each day...and he doesn't have anyone to share it with..."
"He's got us!" Ron sounded like a petulant child, even to his own ears.
"Well...not as much as he used to." She pinned him with a steely gaze. "You must admit we've been somewhat more preoccupied with ourselves, recently."
He coloured. "Yeah, well, he's not around as much either. And when he is..." He trailed off, waiting for his girlfriend to fill in the blanks herself.
True to form, Hermione sighed. "Things were bound to be different, Ron," she said exasperatedly. "And not just because we're together...nor is it because he's pregnant...though they are contributing factors..."
She swivelled, so that her feet now hung over the side of the bed. Pushing herself, she slid out from the comfortable warmth completely, much to Ron's dismay, and began dressing, all the while continuing her speech.
"...We're not eleven anymore; we're young adults now. People change. Friendships...morph. This was going to be a tough year, no matter what the circumstances we found ourselves in." At her lover's saddened look, she proffered a smile, and bent to kiss him. "Oh, that's not to say we're not still close, Ron." Here, she ruffled his hair affectionately. "Harry knows we care deeply for him, just as I know he cares for us. We've just...found less time to communicate it. It would have been this way, even if NEWTS had been our only worry."
The youngest Weasley male seemed vaguely placated. "I s'pose," he eventually replied, hauling himself from bed. "Still, I reckon you were right to begin with..." He quickly threw his legs into a crumpled pair of pants. "Maybe we should...y'know...go see if he's alright. That snake we gave him can't always be the best company in the world."
He frowned as he said it, thinking of numerous instances where he'd found the small beast lurking about his ankles, or curled up in his recently vacated seat, refusing to move upon his return. Harry always found it amusing. Ron had yet to see why.
He yanked on a shirt, not caring that it, too, was rather crinkled.
Once fully dressed, the pair made their way back to the Gryffindor common room. Not surprisingly, it was almost completely vacant, save for a few first and second years scattered about the room, struggling with overdue assignments - the majority for Snape.
"Hey," Hermione said, spying a second year she knew. "Seen Harry about? He's not gone into Hogsmeade, has he?"
The boy, a vaguely distant cousin of Hermione's, shook his head. "Last I saw him, he was headed towards the Quidditch pitch." The child shrugged. "I thought he'd given it up."
Ron and Hermione exchanged worried glances.
She turned back to her third cousin -twice removed- and forced a smile. "Probably just reminiscing, I'd say. Or giving pointers to some beginners."
And she hoped -prayed, actually- that it was that simple.
-?-
Draco soared through the air, savouring the feeling of weightlessness that always accompanied him when he flew. There was nothing quite like it, he decided. The wind always brought a fresh, healthy glow to his cheeks, and the adrenaline rush would leave him prepared to tackle anything. There were no troubles once he was in the sky. There was nothing to stress about. Nothing to regret. It was just him, and his broom, against a never-ending horizon.
But back on the ground...that was a different story altogether.
Harry had been avoiding him. He knew they'd probably never associate as friends, and definitely never again as lovers, but some part of him had hoped -actually hoped- that they might build a civil acquaintance, of sorts.
After all, he didn't have too many people to associate with anymore. His parents -evil though they'd been- were no longer there for him. Many of his Slytherin friends had been forced to take the mark -some had taken it willingly- and were now either dead or rotting in Azkaban. And Snape...well...he wasn't impressed with Draco at that point in time. He'd learned the circumstances behind Harry's child's conception and had spoken to the blond after a class at the beginning of the term.
So that left Draco relatively alone, with the exception of a few Slytherins and Ravenclaws.
A lone figure on the grandstands of the pitch caught Malfoy's eye, and brought him out of his musings. He focused his gaze, only to discern the fact that the solitary figure was none other than Harry -sodding- Potter.
He stayed in the air for another moment, pondering the pros and cons of swooping down to the other boy, before reaching his decision. Gracefully, he drifted to the seats.
"Potter," he greeted, dropping to the Gryffindor's side.
Harry nodded in response. "Malfoy."
Draco noticed the wistful look Harry sent towards his broom. He vaguely acknowledged the pang of guilt that accompanied his observation.
"You miss it a lot?" He asked the question without a second thought, his eyes focused on a distant goal post.
"Yeah..." Harry's response was so quiet, he'd almost missed it.
He shifted in his seat, turning to meet the other's infamous green eyes. Apparently just like his mother's, the traitorous voice in his head piped up. He swatted it away.
"You're looking well."
He could have slapped himself. It was such a stupid thing to say.
Harry attempted an ironic smile, and patted the protruding lump that was his daughter. "So everyone tells me."
Draco's eyes lingered on his once-foe's abdomen. His condition was becoming rather obvious. "Has anyone commented on your...growth?"
"Has anyone worked it out yet, you mean?"
The blond nodded.
Harry sighed. "Don't think so. My robes usually hide it." He gestured towards a lump of material haphazardly thrown on the chair beside him. "But, pretty soon, that's not going to be much help."
"Bugger, eh?"
That elicited a small -but genuine- smile. "Yeah," Harry said, "Could say that."
Draco grinned, and they sat in silence for a few minutes.
"Snape cornered me at beginning of term..." The blond started cautiously, hoping to gauge Harry's reaction. They were actually getting along, and he didn't want to over step his boundaries just yet. When the other didn't even flinch, he continued. "Wasn't too pleased with me..."
Harry looked out over the Quidditch Pitch. "Do you blame him?"
"No. But I hope he was easier on you." Draco was pleased to see the genuine surprise on the Harry's face. "I believe it was my plan, after all."
"He was...well...nice, actually." Harry admitted. "Once he'd had time to adjust, I mean."
"Oh?" On some level, Draco was jealous. He knew he had no right to feel that way...but it still hurt him to hear about his head of house giving preferential treatment to Gryffindor's Golden Child.
"He was surprised." Harry nodded. "He wants her, though. As his own. Which is good for her." He caught the look on his rival's face, and shrugged. "Hasn't stopped him from being a bit... upset with me though."
That seemed to relieve Draco a little. Harry had been in the wrong, and Severus had acknowledged it. It seemed a bit fairer now.
"Well, that's better than you'd imagined..."
"I s'pose..." Harry shifted uncomfortably. He'd imagined far better, actually.
Snake, picking up on Harry's restlessness, emerged from under his discarded robe.
"Issss everything alright, Harry?" She asked, her beady eyes fixed on Draco. He didn't smell dangerous...but he was a wizard, and could be warding off her senses.
Harry reached out to stroke the scales on the peak of her face. She enjoyed the sensation. "Everything's fine," he told her, marvelling, idly, in how much she'd grown. Hadn't she been fully-grown when he'd received her? After all, she'd been owned before... Though, if she'd been kept in a small enclosure, her growth might have been restricted...And, as he now kept her in the open, she had plenty of room to adapt...
"And the wizard?" She asked, halting his musings. "Isssss he caussssing you trouble?"
He shook his head. "Draco's fine. He can be a bit annoying, but he's no threat."
She accepted his reply, but moved to curl up in his lap as a precautionary measure, nonetheless.
"Nice snake." Draco commented, having watched the display in silent awe. How he wished he could understand the language!
"Thanks. She's a little protective." Harry stroked her scales gently. "Though, she'll make for an effective babysitter, I'm sure."
Draco offered a smile of his own at that. He'd owned a snake once, before his father had given it to the Dark Lord. A mate for Nagini, he'd said. Pffft. More like a snack.
"May I?" he asked, longing to feel the rippling of the scales beneath his fingertips.
Harry gave his consent, and, tentatively, he ran a long, pale finger down her length.
The moment was interrupted by the sound of approaching footsteps.
"Oi, what are you doin' here?" An accusing voice asked behind him. It didn't take a genius to realise who the voice belonged to.
"Ron," Granger's voice admonished, "He's got just as much right to be here as we do."
"But Harry-"
"-Is a big boy now, and can decide who he wants to talk to by himself." Draco fought the urge to laugh at the condescendence with which she treated her boyfriend. What really amused him was how easily the Weasley took it.
"Sorry..."
She sighed. "Apologise to Harry, Ron. Not me."
"Actually, you could both apologise to Draco..." Harry piped up. Draco turned to find that he was now standing, his robe fastened securely around him, disguising his pregnant belly.
Surely his best friends knew...
"It's not good for the baby if I'm frustrated...and your continued bickering is frustrating."
And there was Draco's answer. He, too, rose from his seat, deciding, in true Slytherin fashion, to manipulate the scenario to his advantage. "Look, I'll just leave, shall I? I don't want to cause any trouble." And, he realised with a jolt, he was being completely honest.
"You shouldn't have to-"
"No, Harry, it's alright." He got a thrill of pleasure at the dumbfounded look on the redhead's face. "That Potions parchment isn't going to write itself." He turned to the other two, and delivered his parting shot, knowing that it would hit them where it hurt. "Ron," he nodded, "Hermione." And, with a final nod in her direction, and a wave to all three, he mounted his broom and soared away, waiting until they were safely out of earshot before he burst into surprisingly light-hearted laughter.
Back on the grandstands, Ron was seething. "That slimy, no good-"
"Ron, he was being nice!"
He turned to glare at his girlfriend. "And you don't think there's something a little off about that?"
Actually, she did find it rather suspicious, but knew that discussing it in front of Harry was a bad idea. It would only serve to drive them further apart, and she had a feeling that Malfoy would take pleasure in that.
"Ron," She tried again. "We didn't come here to argue about Malfoy. We came to spend time with Harry."
"You don't have to feel obligated-" Harry attempted to break in. He was cut off by Hermione, who was, naturally, horrified by his suggestion that they were only there because they felt they had to be.
"Harry!" She gasped, rushing to give him a hug. "Never, ever say such horrid things! We came to find you because we miss spending time with you!" She clutched him tightly. "It seems our timing is often terrible this year. I mean, you've not been around when we've come to find you, and I imagine it's the same when you come after us."
He rarely ever looked for them, but he nodded anyway. It was nice to see them privately again.
"Now," she added, her temper subsiding, "How's that little girl of yours, then?" She placed her hands on his stomach, the thick wool of his robes muting most of the feeling. "It must be the most extraordinary experience..."
"Hey!" Ron cut in, panicking at the glimmer in her eyes, "Don't start gettin' clucky. My parents'd kill me." He paused, then another thought struck him. "Your parents'd kill me!"
Harry gave a hearty laugh, and it caused the baby to stir. He was in his seventh month now, and she was kicking somewhat viciously, so much so that Hermione felt her through his robe.
"Oh!" She exclaimed, removing her hands in surprise.
He chuckled. "I think I woke her up."
"That's amazing!"
Harry nodded, a grin threatening to split his face apart, were it to widen any further. "Yeah..." he rubbed at his abdomen, "But, Merlin, it hurts sometimes..."
She laughed, and continued to paw at his stomach. He glowed, and answered her questions with glee. Ron added his own thoughts wherever possible.
No, it wasn't the same as the good ol' days, but it was enjoyable for all three. Even Snake amused herself, albeit by harassing Ron...
The Golden Trio sat together for hours, talking about everything and everyone they could. Harry even spoke about Severus, and told the others -with barely restrained glee- all about their latest attempts to remain 'friends'.
Hermione and Ron exchanged glances at that, but remained outwardly supportive of Harry's decision. And -who knew?- perhaps Snape was genuinely making an effort.
The sun began to slip below the horizon and Hermione pulled herself to her feet. She winced as her muscles stretched and her bones cracked.
"Come on, it's getting late." She told her companions, offering Harry a helping hand. He took it, and heaved himself to his feet.
"Thanks."
She grinned back at him.
Trudging back up to the castle, Ron and Harry spoke in unison.
"I'm starving!"
"I could murder a crumbed chicken!"
Here, Hermione shot the raven-haired teen a questioning glance. "Don't you mean crumbed chicken breast, Harry? Or thigh?"
He looked at her as though she were stark, raving mad. "No...an entire bloody chicken." He patted his belly. "Eating for two."
She arched an eyebrow. It sounded as if he were eating for two hundred. In her wisest move yet, however, she held her tongue, and followed the boys into the hall.
-?-
Christmas was fast approaching, as was Harry's due date. His waistline had completely disappeared, and he'd no longer been able to hide his condition behind his robes. Luckily, as it was getting so cold, he'd been able to wear larger, woollen robes without stirring any suspicion.
But people would still ask questions when he suddenly started walking around the school with a baby.
He was starting to panic, wondering whether it was a good idea to let the truth into the open and allow people to adjust before he gave birth and sprang his daughter on the Wizarding world.
Deep in thought, he wasn't quite watching his step, and waddled -for he could no longer call it walking- straight into another person.
"Oomph!" "Oof."
"I'm so sorry!"
"Watch your step, Potter."
At that, he looked up at the other boy. It was a Slytherin sixth year, one whose father had been sentenced to rot in Azkaban, after the final battle. Though he was younger, the boy towered above Harry, and he didn't sound, or look, too friendly.
"I really am sorry...I didn't mean-"
The Slytherin looked around and saw that they were alone. He sneered, and took a menacing step forward. "No-one to protect you, eh Potter?" Another step. "No-one to hear you scream?"
Harry's eyes widened. This boy meant to harm him. To harm his daughter! Oh, why had he let Snake go searching for mice? She'd have bitten his would-be attacker by now.
"Look, I really didn't mean-"
"Oh, so you didn't mean to put my Dad away? To ruin everything?"
"Your Dad was a Death Eater. He deserves what he got!" Harry shot back automatically.
"Well I reckon you're gonna deserve what you're about to get."
Was it too late to point out that it was really Neville that this kid wanted? Judging by the look on his face, and his raised wand, it was.
"Oi!" Another familiar -and angry- voice entered the fray. "What do you think you're doing?"
The sixth year grinned. "Malfoy! Brilliant timing! I'm about to take revenge for what Potter did to our families!"
"Timms, you moron, they deserved everything they got." Draco drawled as he approached, his own wand drawn. "And if you'd been more intelligent you'd have known that I fought against them, too." He summoned the other boy's wand, and snapped it in two, before petrifying him and turning to Harry. He softened immediately, sensing the pregnant teen's distress. "Hey, you alright?"
Harry tried to nod, but found he was too in shock to do even that.
He'd been weak and helpless in the face of danger! Who knew what horrors might have occurred if Draco hadn't happened by! And he hadn't even thought to raise his wand! Oh, he wasn't fit to be a father! He wasn't!
Tears poured down his face, and he fell to his knees, barely registering the arms that wrapped around his sides, keeping him from hitting the ground. He allowed the panic to overwhelm him, and soon enough the world around him went black.
He woke, hours later, in a foreign room, on a comfortable bed. He was disoriented at first, before remembering what had happened. His hands flew to his abdomen, and he was relieved to feel his daughter moving within him. But he didn't deserve to have her...not if he couldn't protect her!
"You're awake." It was Snake who spoke. She was beside him, clearly in position to attack anyone who bothered her charge.
"Yeah..." He replied, still feeling a little woozy. The after-effects of a calming draught. "Where are we?"
"We currently resssside in your mate'ssss ressssting chamberssss."
He was slightly confused. "My mate?"
"Massssster Ssssseverusssss." She clarified. "He isssss outssssside...He hassss been worried. It isssss all around him."
"What is?"
She gave a sound that resembled a sigh of frustration. "Hissssss worry." She moved closer. "I, too, worried. It issssss my job to guard you."
Harry gave her a small smile, and stroked her scales. "It wasn't your fault, Snake. I should have been more cautious."
She protested, and then made her way off the large four-poster. "I will retrieve your mate. It isssss my duty."
She slithered out into the other room and returned minutes later, in the arms of the Potions Master. Severus looked tired, and yet relieved.
"You gave young Mister Malfoy quite the scare."
Harry averted his gaze. "I shouldn't have let my guard down."
"You had no reason to believe you'd be assaulted right underneath the Headmaster's nose."
"I'm the sodding Boy Who Lived. That's reason enough."
Severus sat down on the bed, allowing the serpent to return to her charge's side. "Harry," he lifted the younger wizard's chin, so that his emerald eyes -filled with tears- could see the concern and honesty in his own. "You are not to be hard on yourself. Hogwarts is supposed to be a safe haven, especially with the Dark Lord's demise."
"But I should have known there'd still be some people out for revenge."
"And it was a student from my own house, Harry. If anyone should have noticed his agenda, it should have been me."
Harry was taken by surprise at Severus' mournful tone. "You can't think that you could have known!"
Snape felt a smirk tugging at his lips. "And, by that reasoning, neither can you." He placed a tentative hand on Harry's stomach, and felt his lips twitch when the faint tapping against his palm began. "You're both safe, and Draco has been thanked for taking action..."
"Do you still hate him? For impersonating you, and all that?"
Harry was feeling better. He was glad that Severus didn't blame him for putting their child in danger, and no longer felt quite as guilty about it himself. He was also glad that they'd slowly built up a friendship over the months, as it was good to have the older wizard there beside him. It was reassuring, and it made him feel strong again on the inside.
"That is a difficult question to answer..." Severus sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose in thought. "To begin with, I never hated Mister Malfoy for his actions. He disappointed me, yes. However, though highly illegal, his...behaviour has bestowed me with an opportunity that I never believed I'd receive." He glanced, pointedly, at Harry's abdomen, then back to the younger wizard's eyes. "And, loath though I am to admit it, it is Mister Malfoy's meddlings that forced you and I into this friendship, however unconventional it might be."
Harry couldn't stop the smile from forming on his face. Snape was actually glad they were friends! The thought filled him with warmth and happiness. "Thank you, Severus..." He said, placing his hand over the Slytherin's. "I...I'm glad everything happened, too."
He sounded foolish, he knew, but he was too absorbed in his joy to care.
Severus was glad they were friends!
He genuinely cared!
When Harry went to bed that night, he slept soundly, dreaming of obsidian eyes and the faint scent of sandalwood.
-?-
"Albus, something must be done to ensure his safety!" Severus paced the length of the Headmaster's office. "That snake alone is clearly not enough. If Malfoy hadn't stumbled upon them in time..." He trailed off, not even wanting to think about what might have happened. Better to let the old coot fill in the blanks himself.
"Severus, calm yourself..." Dumbledore looked old, and weary. "Harry is safe where he is. Today's incident was unfortunate, yes, but young Mr Timms has been dealt with..."
"Surely you don't believe he was the only one of his kind?" Severus was horrified.
He suffered from flashbacks, seeing himself as a child in this very office after Black's prank, hearing Dumbledore's placations and promises there would be no more incidents like it.
He was doing the same tonight, Snape realised with a jolt. Harry was no longer of any use to him, and thus his safety was barely an issue. Though Timms had been expelled where Black had not, nothing more had changed. The Headmaster was putting yet another of the Snape line in jeopardy, though he didn't know it.
Severus smirked to himself. If Albus only knew...Perhaps he would, in time...but, oh, if he only knew how he was repeating history...Would he gasp in shock? Would he feel guilty?
"My dear boy, I am glad you have worked past your animosity with young Mr. Potter, but to question my authority-"
"Forgive me, Albus." Severus concealed a sneer, and formed a quick plan in his mind. "But I worry for the child he carries. Imagine what might happen once she is born. Many of Potter's remaining foes will practically salivate at the thought of harming his heir...And, if there are others lurking in Hogwarts -as I have no doubt that there are- it is our duty to ensure they cannot harm either of the Potters." He paused, before deciding to end on a lighter note. "And, aside from the dangers, we must consider the needs of Potter's dorm-mates. They might not approve of a crying child sharing their sleeping space. He must be allocated another room."
Here, Albus smiled. "Ah, Severus, I believe I have a solution..."
As he left the older man's office later that night, Severus sighed to himself. Dumbledore's 'solution' was clearly intended as a reminder that he was in charge, and Severus would do best not to question his actions.
Little did he know that he'd reacted in just the way Snape had expected him to.
And, this way, he'd be able to spend time with his daughter.
Albus was definitely losing his touch.
-?-
The end of term was nearing, and Harry no longer waddled around the corridors alone. Snake always accompanied him, as did Ron or Hermione. Severus, when he could, lurked in the shadows.
Though Harry was grateful, he couldn't help feeling smothered.
At least the Christmas holidays would soon be upon them. He'd receive more private time then; especially with Ron and Hermione going home for the break.
Thoughts of Snape Manor, covered in snow, filled his head, and he sighed longingly.
If only...
Perhaps, because they were friends, Severus might invite him to return...But it seemed doubtful. The man had been avoiding him again.
Certainly, he lurked in the shadows, making sure that he, Harry, was always safe...but he rarely spoke to him directly any more.
He was probably just busy marking assignments...but Harry still missed the contact.
So it was then, on the last night of term, Harry made his way towards the Slytherin's quarters, sneaking about under his father's cloak, so that he might travel alone. He'd sent Snake off earlier, knowing that she missed going on the hunt, and he'd left Hermione and Ron a note, should they come looking for him. He doubted that they would -it was their last chance to spend the night together until school returned- but the note was there, just in case.
Checking the coast was clear, he shed the cloak and tapped on the door.
"Enter."
He complied.
Severus sat by a roaring fire, a book in hand. He glanced up as Harry entered, then frowned when he realised the boy was alone.
"You came without an escort?"
Harry rolled his eyes, and waddled to the chair beside his professor's. "It was perfectly safe." He said, holding up the cloak. "I had this."
Snape's scowl deepened. "Foolish boy, it's not merely an issue of physical protection that others escort you." He reached forward to place a pale, elegant hand on Harry's extremely large belly. "You could fall or harm yourself, and not a soul would know where you were...or, worse still, you might fall into labour, and, again, nobody would be able to send for help, as we wouldn't know where you were, nor what condition you were in."
Harry's eyes widened. He hadn't even thought of that!
"I'm sorry...I...I didn't think..." He blushed, and averted his gaze. "I just...I missed you." A sharp kick signalled that it wasn't just him that missed the other wizard. They shared a smile. "We missed you."
Severus removed his hand, and nodded, "Indeed."
There was silence. The fire crackled and hissed merrily. It was peaceful in Severus' chambers, Harry decided.
He received another sharp jab somewhere in the vicinity of his kidneys. He rubbed absent-mindedly at the sore spot. His daughter had been overly active all day. He hoped it wouldn't become a routine for her...his insides couldn't handle the abuse!
"Albus has suggested a new living arrangement for you." Severus eventually informed him, piquing his interest.
He'd been wondering what would happen when the baby finally arrived. "Oh yeah?"
Snape nodded. "You are to move into my chambers. A new room has already produced itself. The walls are shifting to include a nursery as we speak."
Harry goggled at him. "What?" He asked, rubbing at the site of yet another sharp internal attack. "Does he know-"
Severus actually chuckled, taking him by complete surprise. "No. That's the beauty of it. He sees it as a 'punishment' for my insinuations that he no longer cares for your safety."
The Headmaster's words echoed in his ears. "Seeing as you and young Harry have overcome your differences, it seems only logical that you share your quarters with the boy, and help him with his child."
Severus, naturally, had protested. If he hadn't, the old fool might have become suspicious, and that would have ruined everything.
Harry was glad he was seated, else he might have fainted in shock. "That's...amazing." He pondered for a moment, "When can I move in?"
"Your belongings will be brought over tomorrow. I had planned to surprise you then, after your peers had left."
Somehow, Harry managed to lunge out of his seat, and into the older wizard's lap. "Oh, Sever-OUCH!" He stroked the base of his spine. "That hurt!"
"What did?" Severus was uncomfortable with having the boy so close. Perhaps this was a bad idea to share his rooms...
"She kicked me...really hard. Been at it all day."
Snape placed his own hand on Harry's stomach, and the boy winced, though he, himself, felt nothing.
"Harry," he met the younger wizard's eyes, "Have you considered the possibility that a number of these 'kicks' might, in fact, be labour pains?"
The teenager's eyes widened. "Er...no..." However, that made sense; some of the pains had been too sharp and isolated and almost cramp-like in nature to be his daughter's feet...
Suddenly he was panicking. He didn't want to give birth yet! He hadn't braced himself for the pain! He hadn't even begun sorting out clothing or, worse yet, furniture! Sweet Merlin, where would she sleep!
"Potter...Harry..." Snape was saying, "Deep breaths now..." On some level, Harry realised he was hyperventilating, "You've no reason to distress yourself yet...At least, not until the temporary birth canal forms..." For then Harry knew he'd experience true pain...and there'd be blood...so much blood...
He whimpered, and clutched at Severus' robes, burrowing his face deep into the older man's neck. "I can't do this anymore..."
Awkwardly, Severus rubbed circles on Harry's back. "Nonsense...The entire ordeal will be over before you know it...and you will receive a charming infant for your efforts." He rolled his eyes as he spoke; newborn infants were a far cry from 'charming'. Red, wrinkled and squalling, on the other hand...
"Severus, I can't...I'm not strong like you..."
"Potter..." He tried, his tone one of warning.
Harry took no heed.
"I'm not! You've suffered at Voldemort's hand more times than I can possibly imagine...And I'm afraid of giving birth! I'm a coward!" Another wave of pain, seemingly more pronounced than its predecessors, washed over him, and he cried out, rubbing at his stomach. "I can't do this..." He wept tears of fear, "I can't..."
Severus, desperate to calm the hysterical lad, acted upon instinct, and placed his lips gently upon Harry's.
It wouldn't be until he held his daughter in his arms the next morning that he'd realise what he'd done.
A/N- Alright, I've never experienced contractions, so if the description is a bit hazy…well…at the time of writing this (the first time) I hadn't looked into it too much. However, the excuse I'm going to use is that Harry wouldn't have had any reason to know what to expect either, and thus, didn't put much thought into the pain… (Since writing this, I have been given vivid descriptions of labour and contractions from friends, but I felt it best to leave it as it was…There's some truth to it, or so I'm told, but again, I like having the vague descriptors to bring attention to Harry's confusion and panic...)
Oh, and if anyone spots the major (and I mean MAJOR) plot-hole I put forth in this chapter (like I just have on this re-read), keep it to yourself. LOL. I am re-editing a previous chapter to fix my mistake as we speak. Once I have posted it, nobody will ever be able to spot it. MWAHAHAHAHAHA... (Smirks)