Special Chapter: Too Much of a Good Thing, p. 2
A/N: So, here we are again. I'd like to conclude this here, because the previous chapter was simply to put something up and end the long hiatus, and we all don't like just having intermission chapters. Which shouldn't even count as chapters. Um, anyway, moving right along. . .Squaresoft owns FF7 and its characters, LadyTifa26 owns Laura, and any other characters than Rachel and Christina belong to other authors, given their permission. Now, can we read the chapter? Ah, you're probably not even reading this part. . .
Rachel was skipping along the dirt path out of town, back to the forest she first landed in. In the party was Vincent the Red Mage, Aeris the White Mage, Laura the Black Sorceress, Tifa the Monk, Lucrecia the Blue Chemist, Christina the Hunter, and Rachel, who was of course, a White Knight. After the news came that the woods, named Moore Forest after the town of Moore, had been breached by X-Death. And so, our heroes, set forth to-
"What the crap is up with that commentary, huh?" mumbled Tifa, wondering why Rachel was talking to herself. "Are all White Knights crazy, or something?
Laura was busy trying to send a squirrel to the X-Zone.
"Maybe not so much," Vincent sighed.
"YAI!" Laura screamed.
"You set another one on fire, didn't you?" asked Christina, with a blinding headache.
"Noooo. . .," Laura sniffled, trying to conceal the flaming rodent. ". . . IT WAS AN ACCIDENT!"
"How can you hold that?" asked Vincent, casting Ice on it.
"Fire Gloves. Absorbs fire," she nodded, after chucking the squirrel.
"WHAT?" asked Tifa. "Do you even CARE about that squirrel?"
"It was dead. . .," she sniffled, looking traumatized.
"YOU WERE TRYING TO SEND IT TO ANOTHER DIMENSION!"
"Shhh!" hushed Christina, upon entering the forest. The forest's branches seemed to seal a path, but as soon as Christina approached, the branches unknotted their arms and gave way to the trail.
"Ooh, sexy," said Cloud.
". . ."
"What? It opened 'cause it acknowledges my sexy manhood."
"No, because I'm the guardian and it opens for me," said Christina.
Rachel blinked. "So, then it acknowledged YOUR manhood?"
"SHADDUP!" she shouted, slapping Rachel over the head, then pulling out a long, wispy branch from a satchel at her waist.
"What?" asked Vincent. "But, how could that fit in-
"It's a game, just go with it," Christina shrugged, then set the branch on the ground.
Crickets chirped.
A random tumbleweed blew by.
The planets aligned and parted.
". . . .So, what do we do now?" asked Laura.
The stick started to move, and in a sweep, spun to the right at the trunk of a tree.
"OOOOHH!" Rachel started to clap. "DO IT AGAIN! DO IT AGAIN!"
"LATER. . .," Christina said. "The Elder Branch says to move in that direction, and we'll find the path to X-Death."
Later on, the party walked through the emptied forest, not containing more than grass, trees, and the occasional rustling in the bushes of a goblin spying on them. The forest grew denser with the passing of time, and for while, they did not speak. For once.
"Hey, Christina?" asked Rachel. Oh well, there goes that. "Who's this 'X-Death' guy?"
"The most people ever see of him is this figure in a long cape, and his face is concealed by a mask," she said. "It's hard to tell."
"Well gee, that's super helpful," said Laura. "I guess we can still look for some crazy dude in a mask though, huh? OW!"
Before the rest could turn around, Laura was flat on the forest floor, having tripped over a treasure chest, tangled in the vines.
"OOH, TREASURE!" said Rachel, going right to it.
"Y-yeah, thanks for the help, remind me to petrify you later. . .," Laura grumbled, getting to her feet.
"A Giant's Drink," said Rachel, looking at it.
"Ah, it increases your-
"MINE!" shouted Cloud, cutting off Lucrecia and snatching it from Rachel's hands.
"What do you want with THAT?" asked Rachel.
"Nothing," said Cloud, although winking at Tifa. "I know what you're thinking. . .'How could it get ANY BIGGER?'"
"Last time I checked, I had to squint to even know it was there," said Tifa flatly.
"WHAT!" He quickly popped the cork on the vial, chugged it down, and proceeded the attempt to remove his pants. "CHECK ME NOW"!
"NOOOO!"
"Ooh, a Fire Shield. HAWT," Rachel remarked, tucking the shield into her "mystical back of mystic. . .stuff". Generally speaking, that bag you never see but carry everything in, and everything mysteriously fits. "I wonder if this will come in handy. YAHHH!" A splash of fire hit beside her feet, and after a stumble, the branches cleared to reveal a new patch of forest with some crystals floating overhead. ". . . Dude, that's freaky. WAAAUGH!"
This time, Christina dove and knocked Rachel out of danger, taking the Fire Shield for herself. "They're Elemental Crystals!"
Unsheathing her sword, Rachel made a dash and jumped, above a crystal, kicked a foot against it, and cut across another. "WELL, WHAT DOES THAT TELL ME, HMMM!" She stood in the middle, looking at the four immense crystals that seemed to radiating a strange power. "DON'T TELL ME WHAT THEY ARE, TELL ME HOW TO KILL THEM!"
"Well," Christina started, "you can't kill them, considering they're not alive to begin with." Another blast of fire came towards her, which she crouched behind the shield to absorb.
"DOES IT REALLY MATTER!" Cloud finally got in all this, and gave his share of slashing attacks, all of which didn't seem to affect the crystals. "Oh, poopy."
Tifa, however, was tearing left and right, becoming the target of the Lightning Elemental. Lunging upward, she threw a palm towards the aggressing crystal, but the power surging around it forced her backwards. "THROW SOME MAGIC AT IT!" She flipped backwards, her feet hitting against a tree and shaking the leaves.
"HOLD OONNNNNN!" Laura whined, flipping through a spellbook. The Fire Crystal hurling surge of flames, and with that she moved her spellbook aside and the fire smashed against her Fire Gloves, quickly read a line of the book, and threw it back in a ball. "KNOCK THE BLUE TO THE RIGHT!"
"Blue to the right?" Rachel blinked, eyes moving over the battlefield, and spotting the blue crystal of ice. "OHHHH!", she said, but then realized, ". . . "
. . .AND THEN REALIZED. . . .
". . . ."
. . . .GET ON WITH IT, DAMMIT! "BUT I CAN'T GET THERE!"
A clap was heard; a green form had already hit the blue crystal from the left, knocking it somewhat to the right, but the fireball was already too close.
"KILL THIS THING ALREADY!" Christina shouted, pulling out an arrow while jumping. She was moving to a tree when it hit; she flipped and dipped the arrow into the fire.
"Show off," Rachel mumbled.
The fire cracked the ice; a few shards fell. It still held.
"Cover your eyes!" Christina, landing squarely on a branch, shot the fire arrow straight into the heart of the ice, splitting the shards everywhere.
Laura cast a shield, Cloud smashed them with his sword. Tifa knocked them away effortlessly, and Rachel, well. . .
"HOTCHAHOTCHAHOTCHA!" Rachel scrambled, and finally ducked behind a tree. "WAIT UNTIL I'M NOT IN THE MIDDLE OF THEM, WHY DON'TCHA!"
"You're expendable," Christina shrugged. "Hotcha hotcha hotcha?"
"I MAKE THAT NOISE!"
"OH HO HO HO HO!"
"But I don't make THAT noise. What was that?" asked Rachel.
The shards splintered and disappeared, but what came was a warrior cloaked in red, with a familiar black head of hair.
"Hey, that's kinda funny," said Vincent. "It sounds like me."
". . ."
"What?"
"Where WERE you?" they asked.
"What, did something happen?"
"AHEM!" The red clad warrior stepped forward, with the red helmet still shadowing their face. "Does nobody appreciate a good introduction these days?"
"Not unless you're hot," said Cloud. "But, you're probably fugly with the helmet, huh? Well, and you're a guy."
"I AM A GIRL!" shouted the warrior, throwing off the helmet, black hair falling out. "I AM GILGAMESH!"
"Hot," said Cloud.
Tifa shot him a funny look.
"Well, what?"
"You look like Surka," said Rachel. "HI, SURKA!"
"Well, they do call me that, but the master. . ." Surka sadly turned around and sighed.
"Ah, she gave you a weird name," said Laura. "Like my pet goldfish, Fluffy."
"BUT ENOUGH OF THIS BANTER, FOOLISHNESS, AND FLUFFY!" Surka declared. "It's my job to take you down, in the name of my master!"
The leaves crunched in the distance, like a boot tread upon them. The faint silhouette of a masked, long-haired figure came into the light of the clearing, with shimmering silver hair.
"Well, THAT was obvious," Rachel spat.
"But there's something wrong with him. . .," said Christina. "Isn't X-Death. . .TALLER?"
"WHAT, GOT A PROBLEM WITH ME!" shouted X-Death, in a less than manly voice.
"Now I KNOW there's a problem," said Tifa. "Aren't you Sephiroth?"
"PFFT! NO, I'M X-DEATH! AND THIS IS GILGAMESH!" said X-Death, slapping Surka on the back.
"Master, could you please call me-
"GILGAMESH! NO PROBLEM!"
"But master, my name is-
"YOU TOLD ME ALREADY, GILGAMESH!"
"Sir?"
"Yes?"
"MY NAME IS NOT GILGAMESH!"
"OH, YOU'RE SO FUNNY, GILGAMESH! Such a kidder, this one," exclaimed X-Death.
"That's some crazy mask you got on, Mr. X-Death Man," said Rachel. "Why do you wear it?"
" 'Cause it's HOT," said X-Death. "Don't you think so, my pretty?"
"Dude. . .," Rachel whispered to Laura. "I think the villain is hitting on me. . ."
"YOU THINK?" asked Laura.
"GILGAMESH, GO CAPTURE THE GIRL!"
"YES MASTER!"
"WAIT! DON'T YOU BELIEVE IN TAKING IT SLOW!" Rachel sniffled.
"As much as I enjoy the idea of Rachel being taken away, I can't let you do that," said Tifa, stepping forward.
"T-Tifa. . .," said Rachel, in a sniffle of gratitude.
"YES! SHE MAKES AN EXCELLENT HUMAN MEAT SHIELD!"
"GAH!" Rachel fell right over.
"Oh, you know I'm just kidding. It's simply not right to let an innocent person be captured," Tifa said. "It's my moral obligation as a monk."
"And Tifa's technically the leader of the party, so it's not like we have any will of our own, you know?" Laura shrugged.
Surka readied her sword and took an aggressive stance towards the party. "Any time you say so, Master!"
"Wait, I wanna do this myself," said X-Death. "But first. . ." X-Death slid their fingers across the face of the mask, and pulling down slowly, uncovered a shock of red hair.
"Oh holy mother of God," Rachel muttered.
"Somebody say something about what?" asked Aeris, still straggling somewhere by a patch of flowers. ". . .Where did everyone go?"
"HYAH!" Kiro sped forward, and locked lips with Christina.
"HAH! HMM. . .Ugh. . ." Christina slumped to the ground, poisoned, pale in pallor.
Tifa spun around when Kiro dove out of sight. "You can't pull the same thing twice!" A rustle in the bushes prompted her attention, and her joints instantaneously pulled her to the side. But then it was quiet, and another rustle was heard, then another, and another from each bush at once.
"GROPE OF DOOM, LV. 5!" Falling from the sky, Kiro dove for Tifa, groping her. . .essentials.
"Gh!" Tifa was momentarily paralyzed. "I. . .I. . .mm. . ." Her eyes rolled back and shut as she fell with a thud.
"HEY, YOU BETTER STAY AWAY FROM ME!" shouted Laura, casting a barrier spell.
At an astounding speed, Kiro charged up and was already nose-to-nose with her. "But it takes you time to cast those spells, doesn't it? KISS OF SILENCE!" Kiro's tongue was already moving Laura's for her, but it wasn't exactly for a spell.
". . . . . .!" Laura was speechless. "!"
"Mommy?" Rachel sobbed, hiding behind Cloud.
"RACHEL! WHITE KNIGHTS DON'T RUN AWAY!" he said courageously. "WE. . .We. . ." He strolled up to Kiro. "We don't mind sloppy seconds."
"You can't do that to us!" said Vincent, stepping forward with Cloud, but for different reasons. "Whatever attack you have won't work."
"Don't think I'm so one-sided," she said with a wink. "LOVE TAP!"
"What-AHHHHKKKK!" Cloud, his hands buried between his thighs, had a boot knocking his family jewels.
"Suddenly. . .," Cloud gasped, on his knees. "I FEEL THAT GIANT'S DRINK WAS NOT SUCH A GOOD IDEA. . ." And he passed out.
Vincent was petrified by the horror. "Who. . .who would do such a thing!"
"Such a low blow, I guess?" asked Kiro, with what looked genuinely innocent. "Well, that's how we become villains, I suppose," she said, scratching her head. "But you wouldn't do a thing to me, would you?"
Vincent, with a glare, began to read for his sword and spellbook.
"Mm-mm. . .," said Kiro, waving her finger. "Look over there." The finger halted and pointed to Lucrecia, tied to a tree, shot with arrows, and knives, and daggers, the blood creating small streams to which the fell and met the roots of the tree.
Lucrecia smiled, with a tiny gasp said, "Do. . .not forget the past. . ." and her eyes fogged and stagnated.
Vincent was stunned. ". . .You. . .you didn't. . .did you. . .!" The grass began to wave, and the air grew black around him, his eyes in shadow, and-
CONK!
"Well, that's that," said Surka, whacking him over the head before he could transform.
"Goody," said Kiro, snapping her fingers; the Lucrecia became a puppet again. "Oh right, we came here for. . .Uh. . ." She stopped. ". . .Why isn't it here?"
Surka sighed and hid her forehead amidst her hand. "Sometimes, I wonder who should be the one giving orders around here. . ."
"So, where're we going, cap'n?" asked Rachel, being dragged and carried in a burlap sack by Surka. She paused for a moment. ". . . . .I have a bad feeling about that question."
"AHAHAHAAA!" Kiro cackled. "My love chamber, of course!" Very proud of herself, despite the missing article they were searching for, she had her hands akimbo. "I have a castle, with minions, surrounded by mountains, and I know you'll just love the décor! It's very evil."
"Ooh, evil is sexy," said Rachel, still very airheaded. But what else did you expect? "Sometimes, I wonder why I wasn't a Black Knight, but you know, I keep running into things and the white magic is really helpful. . ."
"I can't BELIEVE we're kidnapping. . .," said Surka, obviously becoming a little worn of being someone's lackey. "I thought you were the BIG villain! This is so low!"
"Hey now, X-Death wasn't the coolest villain, right?" asked Kiro, reminding her of the situation.
"Well. . .I guess you're right."
"HEY!"
"That wasn't a squirrel," said Aeris, popping her head of a flowering bush. Sometime along the trail, she became lost, and figured the rest would find her sooner or later.
"Nope, don't think so," said Lucrecia, popping up beside her.
"WAAH-!" Aeris' scream was smothered by Lucrecia's palm.
"Hey now, don't think you're not the only one bad with directions," Lucrecia whispered, taking her hand off Aeris' mouth. "Apparently, Rachel's caught herself in another difficult situation."
"But what else is new?" Aeris shrugged. "I set my watch to it."
"Really?" Lucrecia asked. "I set mine to the astronomical positions of the stars. The eon hand hasn't moved in ages."
Aeris was, for once in a long time, exasperated. "I sometimes think you're in a complete state of Confusion."
In the meantime, Rachel was trying to plan an escape. Unfortunately for her, she was a knight, and the only kind of planning used was busting through the front door. However, being also a white mage, she learned another type of reasoning.
"PLEASE DON'T HURT ME! MY DEFENSE POINTS ARE LOW!"
"Oh please, don't give me that," grumbled Surka. "You're a knight with healing magic; if anything, you have high defense and fair intelligence." She pondered those words. ". . .Okay, we won't hurt you."
"At least, Surka won't. MUAHAHAHAAA!" Kiro laughed again. "Ah, finally, I can put my love chamber to good use."
"But sir. . .uh. . .madam. . er. . ., you used it just last night," Surka blinked.
"AND IT FEELS LIKE AGES!" Kiro sobbed. "I can't help it if I'm a healthy young girl! With healthy desires!"
"You can argue that. . .," said Surka, scratching her head nervously.
"Besides!" Kiro started to say, as a matter of fact. "I've never seen such a lovely young lady!"
Surka and Rachel were dead silent. ". . . .ARE YOU ON CRACK!"
"No, but the occasional tonic spiked with a little tincture. . ." Kiro had a bemused look.
"We're not going to ask," Surka and Rachel decided.
Surka continued. "Sire, you shouldn't use such substances irresponsibly. Mixed together, you'd get-
"A weaker elixir?" Rachel guessed. "I AM a white mage. . .kinda."
"Well. . .I guess. . . .WAAAH!"
"TAKE THAT!" Aeris came out of the bushes with her staff high above her head.
"Oh, so fearsome," said Lucrecia, appearing next to her.
"Hey, I tried!" Aeris sniffled.
Surka was knocked unconscious, and Rachel started to scramble out of the bag. "AIIIIIR!" Then, she saw Kiro, with wide eyes. ". . .BAAAAG!" She tried crawling back in.
"Aeris, you run over there! I gotcha!" said Lucrecia, whipping out a staff. "MAGI-HAMMER!"
"Wha?"
CLA-CLONK!
". . . ." Kiro sat very unamused, rubbing her forehead. "Owww. . ."
Aeris fell over. "THIS IS YOUR PLAN!"
"Hey, I have an attack called , but that doesn't do a thing. . .," said Lucrecia, with a nervous smile. "I learned it from a pack of strange wolves."
While the argument was going on, Kiro ran for the bag.
"Oh, right, I forgot about that."
Rachel, hearing the footsteps, curled up in a ball, awaiting the imminent doom that awaited her virginity. "OH GOD!" she sobbed. "I SAID I AT LEAST WANTED IT WITH SOMEONE HANDSOME! CAN I SWITCH IT TO WITH SOMEONE MALE! AWK!" Underneath her, she felt the bag lift and the ground disappear, and figured the end would come soon, until she heard a shout.
"HEYYY! GIMME BACK MY BAG O' SEX MUFFIN!" The shout was from Kiro.
"Tifa!" It was Aeris' voice. "You came to!"
"Yeah, well. . .!" It was the voice carrying the bag. "It takes a while after that kind of assault!"
The opening of the bag came wide, and when the light came through, so did Rachel's through the top. "Hiya?" The leaves and the surroundings suggested they came to a tree.
"You owe me one, slacker," Tifa said to her, narrow-eyed, but with a smile.
Down below, Lucrecia was whacking Kiro with her magi-hammer. "COME ON!"
And Kiro was running around in circles. "I AM THE GREAT X-DEATH! WAAAH!"
Aeris was absolutely confused. ". . .WHAT. THE. CRAP!"
"Well, X-Death DID suck in the game," said Rachel, scratching her head. "What happened to everyone else? . . .Tifa? . . .TIFA!"
Tifa had an arm around her, smiling. "Well, I used some phoenix downs, antidotes, echo screens. . .They're okay." In a quick pull closer, Tifa's breath beat into Rachel's ear. "Rachel. . ." She whispered, hotly. "Rachel. . .!"
"Mmm. . ."
"Rachel!"
"D-don't-
"RACHEL!"
"AHHH!" Rachel woke up with a start, and saw Tifa's face above her. "AAAAHHH!"
Tifa was thoroughly startled. "Rachel, you were in a cold sweat, and started screaming! Furthermore. . ." Tifa's finger pointed down, and she started to look away.
"What? . . .YAH!" Rachel was beginning to hump a pillow.
"What were YOU dreaming about?" Tifa said, accusingly.
Rachel looked back up at her, complexion draining. ". . . .AHHHHH!" She ran away into a corner. "I-I promise I won't play FFV again! NEVER!"
"Sounds good to me. . .," Tifa blinked, confused. "Whaddya make of it, Kiro?"
Kiro, however, appeared with a fox-like smile, holding some chains and a whip. "Sounds good to me, too. . .That's just more time for a little S&M!"
"AHAHAHAAA!" The two loomed over her in the corner, hands reaching out.
"NO!" Rachel was starting to panic. "NOOOOOOO!"
"Yes. . .YESSS! . . .OW!" Mars received a punch to the head. "WHAT!"
Mike sat beside him on the couch, after just hopping down. "You're starting to drool. It's gross."
"No kidding," said Condrugon, on the other side. "What were YOU dreaming about, anyway?"
"Uhhhh. . ." Mars was a little pink, and he drooped his head and sighed. "I can't even dream about it in peace. . ."
"Mm, good morning," said Rachel, walking downstairs into the kitchen, in some pajama pants and a t-shirt, hair already up. "What are you three doing over there? I was just sleeping there last night."
"Until I kicked her ass out of there," Tifa said, following. She yawned and stretched, before rummaging through the fridge.
"RACHIE-CHAN!" Kiro came from the hall and started her daily morning grope. "I THOUGHT ABOUT YOU ALL NIGHT, SEX MUFFIN!"
"Kiro, lemme go!" Rachel already started to pry her hands off, and then Tifa had to get into the fray.
"CAN'T I HAVE ANY PEACE IN THE MORNING!"
Mars stared and blushed. ". . .Erk. . .mmm. . ." He looked down and pulled a pillow into his lap. "S-stay cool. . .It was just a dream!"
AN3: So. . .I'm done with that.
Tifa: . . . .What the hell were these chapters for?
AN3: Well, they really serve no REAL importance, but I didn't want to wait even longer to produce a chapter. . .I mean, otherwise, we'd have to wait until December. . .
Tifa: Pfft! I'm fine with that.
Cult: BUT WE'RE NOT:sobbing:
AN3: Ah. . .Sitting here in my frigid basement. . .Chapters used to pop right out when I had that old laptop in my room. . .Here, it's so. . .inconvenient. But, my mp3 player makes it less of a burden. . .
Tifa: Burden? You do nothing but sit and produce mind-numbing sludge you call writing.
AN3: Actually, I was analyzing that very problem. . .
Laura: Oh:is now paying attention:
AN3: Y-you mean. . .YOU WEREN'T PAYING ATTENTION BEFORE:sniffles:
Laura:laughing nervously: I wouldn't say THAT. . .But go on!
AN3: Riight. . .So, I was watching Neon Genesis Evangelion, and wondering about the progressiveness of each episode, because every one was as important to the plot as the last, whereas there are so many expendable ones of AE. Well, if it weren't a comedy series. About generally nothing, but you know, AE means a lot to me. Really. I feel there's so much latent potential I'm not tapping into, and there are so many ways I can fix plot gaps. I really intended more for AE, but then I just get caught up in the. . .nothingness.
Tifa: That's what I call "understatement".
AN3: YEAH WELL. . .:shakes fist: So, I will fix this, but instead of rewriting every last episode. . .I will. . .:drum roll: INCLUDE IT IN THE COMIC!
Laura: . . .Comic?
AN3: YES! I AM WORKING ON IT! WE'RE GOING STRONG! You know, if I could've just been happy with all the other ways I started the comic. . .There were so many times I had to redo and then scrap the beginning, because I didn't want to start it off and have the same material as the fanfic, and trust me, that was ONE beginning, and it just didn't satisfy me. But, I came up with an idea, so strange, so outlandish, it had to be used for AE.
Tifa: I'm dreading this.
AN3: WE'RE STARTING IT WITH AN OPENING THEME SONG!
Crickets:chirping:
AN3: What?
Laura: Um, as your humble advisor, uh. . .WHY! WHAT? HUH!
Everyone: ARE YOU ON CRACK!
AN3: Well, if THAT isn't the question of the day. . .In all this time, and all this thinking of the future of this fanfiction, and perhaps, one day making a few flash movies of this totally whacked out series, I've heard a lot of songs I could put to AE. . .But then, I selected what I thought would be the best to put to paper. . .Not the easiest, but the most fun.
Tifa: And, what song?
AN3: . . .Ready Steady Go?
Tifa: . . .We are so doomed. :packing up bags:
AN3: WAIT! IT'S LIKE, ONE GIANT CHASE FOR MY BLOOD!
Tifa: . . . :stops packing: Go on. . .
AN3: This particular opening seemed good because it was a lot like how one average day in the first season would be. In the opening, Tifa kicks my ass out of bed, everyone starts getting ready. . .Some other gags. . .Like when Cloud first shows up, you only see from his waist up and we all look at him funny, and when he looks down to see what we're all staring at, he seems to have forgotten his pants.
Tifa: And I thought the comic was going to be less stupid.
AN3: WAAIIIIIT! And then he runs off, it shows the outside of the house at Nibelheim then the camera settles in front of Tifa's house, Laura and Cloud walk in, and when it's about to hit refrain. . .BAM! The windows and edges of the door explode with smoke. Subsequently, the door flings open, Rachel darts out, and then Tifa. Gags ensue.
Tifa: This better be good. . .
AN3: Ah well. . .The site is actually ready to be put up, I just need to prepare all the images and we can set up shop! I'm planning a page to be put up on the weekend, and then we have a small serial panel comic to fill up about every other day. Furthermore, I'm getting my hands on some copic markers, so I hope to fully color the first comic, and then the first few pages of every other chapter. The panel comic will be in black and white, but if I get rich enough, I might use some screentone. I need some sakura pens, too. . .But, fortunately, I'm getting some money, and the pens are a gift, so. . .:laughs evilly: Everything is falling into place! And as for the flow of the AE comic, I hope to include more about each character. It all makes sense to me, but because I keep forgetting some plot elements that would make it all go so much smoother. . .Heheh. Because I've had so much time to stew on the series, I hope the comic will include all those juicy tidbits I've been forgetting. So, you can see how all the AE FF7 characters have adapted into the people they are, and. . .Actually, I think the only character whose had that kind of exposure is Tifa, but it's not very good, is it?
Tifa: Not so explanatory, no.
AN3: OKAY! LET'S DELVE INTO TIFA'S MIND!
Tifa: Um, how about not?
AN3: Don't be such a spoil sport! To put it simply, if you didn't pick it up the first time, Tifa really cares about Rachel, it's just that-AHHH:is being gagged:
Tifa: WHY DON'T YOU LET THEM FIGURE IT OUT FOR THEMSELVES:lets me go:
AN3: FINE! FIIIIINE! But not all of us are so smart! I mean, this IS the Bush Administration!
Rufus: Everything would be so much better if I were in office.
Reno: Hai, kanchou!
Rufus: STOP CALLING ME "CAPTAIN"!
AN3: Or "spy", as both are interchangeable. . .Did you love Advent Children? I love Advent Children. And I don't know what those tards were thinking when they made Tifa lose. TIFA ISH THE AWESOMENESS!
Cult: HEIL TIFA!
AN3: YES! MUAHAHAHAAA! Reno asserts his hilarity and sexiness quite well. I thought Rude was kinda hot.
Rude: …:blushes:
AN3: He's so sweet! And am I the only one who craves more Loz? Dude. I saw him from behind. His ass is SWEETNESS. WRAPPED IN BLACK LEATHER.
Everyone:backing away: Ewww. . .
AN3: WHAT! It's not like there's any chance Kadaj doesn't crave some buttsex! I can't imagine him with a girl, can you! Anyway, it's great to see Advent Children. Considering AE Season THREE will cover it!
Tifa: Oh dear God. She's planned another one.
Aeris: B-but. . .aren't I. . .dead?
AN3: Yeah, and you're supposed to be. What we're all checking out here is how Advent Children works into AE. And I do have a set amount of seasons in store. We're not even halfway through yet. I could TELL you right now how many seasons there are. . .But. . .well, as Tifa says, why not let you guys find out for yourselves?
Cult: SHE'S WRONG! TELL US!
AN3: Maybe if you're dying to know. I won't announce it here, but if you wish to know by popular demand, just leave it in a review, or IM me if you already do. . .It's lovely to hear from you on IM; I have great fun with it. In other news. . .Wait. No. There's something else that needs addressing. CLOUD'S SHEER HOTNESS. DID YOU SEE HIM IN THAT ENDING SHOT! AND VINCENT'S VOICE! THE WALKING ORGASMS IT INSTILLS! And Sephiroth. . .THE WAY HE FIRST SPEAKS. . .:swooning:
Tifa: She's lost it.
AN3: Hey, these notes are really long, aren't they? Well, there's a lot to update! I haven't been doing this in a long time! As for conventions, I'm thinking of going to Katsucon, but I might not attend if my parents don't let me. . .Oh, I'm 16 now, by the way. . .
Tifa: That's really random.
AN3: Yeah, but then shouldn't Rachel be! You know, that's the legal age in Maryland. THE AGE OF CONSENT.
Kiro:smirks:
Rachel: Mommy?
AN3: Yeah, we sure have a time gap since I wasn't updating. . .That's a problem. . .:sighs: But, I'll have it taken care of. . .There probably won't be a birthday episode, considering if I do make one, we'll be all behind again. But as for the next episode, it will be another special episode, but it will be all applicable to the plot. Although, it won't really go so far in the plot, it just has character relationships in it.
Laura: Do I FINALLY have wild, tantric sex with my Vinnie?
AN3: Noooo. . .Months ago, I received a review or e-mail or SOMETHING from Keily, about an episode about her brother. . .I haven't actually found where I stored the e-mail yet, but if I remember correctly, November is a special month because I think it's the month her brother died years ago? Anyway, it's about all that and stuff. . .I find it something good to make, especially because I have a similar situation.
Tifa: You're both Asian?
AN3: Shaddup! It's deeper than that! Well, I have two brothers I don't know, really. One died when he was 16, and I'm not even sure I was born yet. The other moved away to the Phillipines for college, and I don't know if I've met him either, but I probably have as a baby. . .But he blew his whole tuition on drugs, alcohol, and women, so. . .Yeah, it really has an effect on me. I guess I view this as a way to express myself, as well as another person's perspective, and come on, it's a sweet story! Er, um, okay, I'll wrap this up here.
Everyone: . . .We're not complaining.
AN3: It's too long, anyway! Um, more updates later!