Chapter 11
-I like her-
And Raidou was in time. Genma awaited as promised him in his apartment, but proved to be in a bad mood and not willing to be really hospitable.
"So, what do you want?", he jangled when Raidou had it made himself comfy in on of Genma´s armchairs. Genma seated himself morously opposite his friend, apparentely he regretted having yield to Raidou´s plea.
"Didn´t you say you knew what I wanted to ask two hours ago?" Raidou teased but decided to better get directly to the topic. And Genma would see through subtle attempts in a roundabout way and would become even more angry than he already was. "Um, what´s up between you and Shizune?"
Genma groaned as an answer and rubbed his head as if he was in pain. He had known exactly that Raidou would bring up this subject, nevertheless he wasn´t keen to have this conversation.
"You´re close friends and now you´re ignoring each other overnight? I can´t believe it. What happened?", he continued and grinned inwardly. If he was the first to find out what happened, Anko owed him a whole evening of drinks for free. But of course this was just a positive side effect of the whole thing. His premier intention was to help his best friend. Genma wasn´t unpopular with the female population in Konoha, actually he was one of those notorious ladykillers in the village, a proud member of the legendary heartbreakers league, but Genma was now thirty years old and it was about time to look for a steady relationship, thought Raidou. And if someone like Shizune was in concrete proximity... No, Raidou couldn´t just sit and wait and see how Shizune and Genma behaved like teenagers.
Genma showed not the slightest inclination to answer his question. "If that´s all you came for I have to say I have to dissapoint you."
"Oh, come on, you like her and she likes you, too, you can´t fool me! And by the way the whole village, too, that should be clear to you at least since that incident in the classroom. Do you actually know that there has been a wager about you two?" A nice little sum has accumulated because you two are so damn bloody lethargic and slow on the uptake, he added in thoughts but kept it prudently to himself.
Genma was lost in thoughts and looked everywhere but at his friend. He did not like how things turned out, especially a whole village of curious people who cannot let their noses out of things that wasn´t their concern.
"Genma. I´m your best friend. You always told me everything and you could always talk with me about everything. Why should it be different this time?"
"I don´t know it myself. I just don´t want to talk about it this time, it´s ...different."
That made Raidou grin. "It´s different? Like something ...special?"
Genma´s eyebrow twitched hearing this and he gave Raidou an angry gaze. "What...!"
But his best friend simply interrupted him. "There you can see how much you are emotionally involved. You cannot deny it, its obvious and futile, I know you! So...?"
Genma sighed. It took him a moment to answer and Raidou feared he had to try more, but Genma gave him finally the aswer.
"We nearly kissed." He said in a low voice so Raidou had difficulties to catch the sentence.
"Er, and that´s all?" Raidou couldn´t belive it. "Oh yes, that´s really terrible. Now I get it why you can´t never ever speak to each other again. Boy oh boy, Genma, it really wouldn´t have been your first kiss."
"That´s not the point."
"And what is the point? I mean, you two would fit perfectly together. You know each other since your childhood, you get along wonderful, the last thing that´s missing is that you two see it finally! Oh just do everyone in Konoha the favor and DO it already!"
Genma looked at him with tired eyes. "Already did."
"Nani?" Raidou thought he must have misheared the words.
"We already slept together."
"WHAAAAAAT? Why didn´t you tell me THAT before? Damn, you told me about all your little romances -if I wantetd to hear about or not- but the only one I´m REALLY interested in you keep secret???" Affronted Raidou let himself slump back into his armchair. "You´re so mean!"
Genma scratched his head sheepishly. "Oh well, you know..."
"WHEN?", Raidou urged to know.
"It was the night of my twentieth birthday."
Raidou was wide-eyed. "You mean that party where noone was able to remember a thing afterwards but everyone awoke somewhere without knowing how he got there but with a terrible hangover?" Raidou absentmindly kneaded his chin and nodded to himself. He himself remebered the morning after the party very well because he awoke in his mum´s dustbin without any clue how he got there and especially why.
"Yes, it was then. But it was a mere accident and we decided to tell noone about it."
"Hey, wait a sec. I couldn´t have been that bad to keep it secret, could it? I mean..."
Genma sighed. "No, on the contrary, it was wonderful."
Raidou clapped his hands in enthusiasm. "Fantastic! So what´s hindering you to go at each other anew? You both seemingly are having the hots for each other longer than anyone suspected..."
"It´s not that easy, Raidou."
"Why not?"
"We´re very good friends and it was clear in the first place that this was a one-night stand and nothing more about it. We didn´t want to risk our friendship, which is more important to us. Shortly afterwads she and Tsunade left the village and only recently came back."
Raidou could just frown and shake his head. I want to cry... "But you do still like each other, thats a fact! I mean, you wanted to kiss and stuff..."
"I like her. Very much in fact."
Raidou grinned satisfied. "See..."
"She means a lot to me. But she´s more like a little sister to me. I love her like a sister."
Raidou coughed so he would not snort. "You can´t be serious?!" That´s just ridiculous! "Why these inhibitions? Your AREN´T bloodrelated! Besides, everyone in Konoha is of the opinion that you two are made for each other. That´s clear to EVERYONE! Damn they even bet about you! You are made for each other! Don´t know how much I have to repeat myself but somehow you two seam to see it least of all!!! You act like... argh!!! Please, act your age! You simply have to open your eyes and than you´ll figure out the obvious."
"Raidou, my feelings aren´t like that, sorry to dissapoint you and everyone else in Konoha."
"Really? You´re lying to yourself!
It´s not that you don´t see it, right? But you don´t WANT to see..."
Suddenly Genma lost his temper. "Damn it, Raidou! What do you want?! We´re ninjas! We cannot afford to bind oneself to each other strongly, you know exactly by yourself how painful it is to lose someone!"
Didn´t Raidou hear a faint tone of frustration among these words? "So that´s it? You are afraid? Do you really believe that it´s easier or less painful to lose a friendship than a love?"
Genmas eyes widened anew for a short moment, these words must have hit a nerve.
"Genma, think twice! Our live can end at any second, its in the nature of our job and the nature of life, yes, thats right! But still we´re just human beings, Genma. We feel, we love and are loved. You can´t just switch it off. Just take a look around! Don´t you see the other ninjas cling to that what makes them human? In their freetime they cling to things... they drink, they love and live generous, they behave like little children when they are not on a mission!
They need this and they are allowed to have it. Why are you denying it to yourself? Just out of fear? Thats no excuse! I can´t believe I actually have to remind you of all this because it was you yourself who told me this about 15 years ago. But it seems that in this special case I have to remind you of your own words because you got yourself stuck to your decision, and this has obscured your sense.
Just take a look around! Look at Kurenai and Asuma! Everyone knows about them being together although they didn´t made it public. But do you know the difference between them and you? The don´t lye to themselves! They don´t deceive themselves!
They know exactly what they got with each other and know to appreciate it! They savor what they´ve got and they enjoy their lives because it could be over any moment. Never they would regret anything . Even if one of them dies and the pain be so much, they will never regret their desicion." Raidou´s eyes never left Genma´s face but when he didn´t get a reaction, he shook his head in disappointment. "You are a coward, Genma. I wouldn´t have thought that..."
"That´s not true! You haven´t the faintest idea. You know nothing about it, you don´t get it!"
"Is that so? And what is there not to understand? Isn´t it that rather YOU are the one who doesn´t get it? Apparently it´s futile to discuss this matter with you."
Enraged, Genma flashed his eyes at his friend.
"But there´s one last question I still got. I don´t expect you to answer it directly but to think about it. There is one thing I really don´t get at all."
Genma looked at Raidou with a steady gaze.
"Why, Genma? Why do you let this oppurtunity slip? How can you let such a women pass?"
With that he left- exhausted and tired- and left Genma to his own devices and to hopefully think of his words and come to a conclusion.
Ok, might be a bit overdramatic but I thought Genma needed his brain washed by someone because he was so stuck in his desicion... hope its not too ooc or so.
Oh and this conversation was inspired by real life (my big bro) and inspired me to write this story.
Special thanks for my beta Rashi, who gave her ok for this chapter. By the way she made an excellent GenShi musicvideo at youtube. Its pretty cool!
And thakns for your reviews! I really appreciate them!
Now, lets see what Shizune has to say. Next Chapter: "I like him."