Chapter 19: Not What it Seems
A/N: Wow, this took forever. I wasn't even waiting for carmy...just took long to write. I knew what was gonna happen, so dunno why. Maybe cause this chapter has lotsa feeling and self doubt. Stuff happens too. I know how this story shall turn out, so I'm gonna try to write the next chapter soon. Stupid school (especially english) getting in the way of writing! anyways, review...and enjoy!
As soon as we found other clothes to wear, we came running down the stairs. The sooner this was over, the better. The Grimoire was lying there, just as we had left it. We still hadn't figured out what we should do with it. It would make the most sense to just open it and do the spell. I knew from experience, though, that it's necessary to be careful when dealing with dark magic such as this.
Melinda reached out to the Grimoire, and attempted to open it. Before she even touched it, she drew back, yelping in pain. "What the hell was that!" she yelled, sucking on her apparently burned finger. I studied the book and her finger for a moment. This seemed very similar to what the book of Shadows did, only in reverse.
"I think it might be like he book of shadows, only instead of protecting itself against evil, it protects itself against good", I said slowly.
It was all well and good, but now that I had identified the problem, what were we going to do about it? If we couldn't touch the book, there was no way we could use the spell within. "Patience will probably be able to touch it", Aidan said hesitantly. I shot him a seething look. What exactly was he implying?
"Well…" he continued slowly. I could tell he was very worried that I was mad at him. It proved how much he had grown that nothing burst into flames. "You know…cause of your dad and all", he said matter-of-factly. Great, now he was trying to rationalize. "You could be the source if you really wanted…so the book won't see you as evil."
I was about to snap at him for that remark, but I begrudgingly admitted to myself that what he was saying was true. I was probably the only living creature who had the ability to become the source of all evil. Not that I wanted to or anything. It was just that if I were to be totally honest with myself, I had to admit that I could.
Hesitantly, I reached out to the Grimoire. Why was I afraid to touch it? I had come to terms with who my father was…at least, I thought I did. There was no way that I was evil, so there was no reason to worry. So, why did I think that something horrible would happen if I touched that book? Nothing bad is going to happen. I told myself this over and over again, but it did very little to help.
My fingers inches from the Grimoire, I realized that I was shaking like a leaf. I pulled my hand away. I looked to my cousin and my sort of boyfriend. "I can't do this", I said, already feeling stupid. What the hell was I afraid of? "You can do this. I'm here for you", Melinda told me telepathically. I smiled at her. Somehow, her words could always give me courage.
This time, my hand was surer as I reached to open the Grimoire. It was silly that a book could cause this much reaction. When I remembered what the Book of Shadows had caused, I nearly wanted to hit myself. This was no ordinary book. I soon found out how much that was true, because the moment my hand touched the foreboding cover, a scream ripped through my mind as I was forced to endure a terrible premonition.
It was cold. I didn't know where I was. I was scared…so scared. So dark. Wanted to get out. Trapped. The book. Evil. It was evil. The spell to bring us home. Couldn't do it. The source. Fireball. Pain. Burning, searing, excruciating. Screaming all around. Everything gone. Then nothing.
I shot out of the premonition nearly as forcefully as I had been pulled into it. I stumbled backwards, shaking and sweating profusely. It was Aidan who caught me. Not only had I seen that premonition, but I felt it. I heard my mother describe similar experiences countless times. I had always had some awareness of my own feelings during premonitions. However, in this premonition, I didn't only feel my own feelings; I felt everyone else's.
Such terror and such pain…I had never felt nor experienced anything like it before. We had all died in that premonition; Aidan, Melinda and I. I had seen visions of my own death before, and they terrified me. What was worse this time was that I actually felt it. I had felt Melinda and Aidan's death too. I had felt it all.
I was completely unaware that Aidan was pulling me to my feet. I could barely stand. It was difficult to even think. He managed to get me seated on the sofa, and he and Melinda sat on either side. I took deep breaths, trying to calm myself and explain what I had seen. The moment I looked at them, I began to cry. I cried for the knowledge of what was to come. I cried because I couldn't stop it. Most of all, I cried because I loved them both so much.
"Patience, What is it? What did you see? I know it must have been horrible, but you have to tell us", Melinda said gently. She put her hand on my shoulder, and Aidan held my hand. Their support did not give me strength as it had done before. Instead it made me feel more helpless and alone than ever before. They didn't know what would happen. I had to tell them. I had too.
"It was…, I began, choking back sobs, "we were…" I couldn't. It was too much. Whenever I though about what I had seen, I wished I could die just then, to spare myself any future pain. Aidan reached over, and placed his arm around me. Melinda began flattening my hair. It was what my mother used to do when I was upset. It made me feel a little bit better. "We died!" I managed to choke out.
Melinda and Aidan looked at me with identical expressions of shock. There reactions then were so predictable that I didn't need to have the power of premonition to have predicted them.; Melinda immediately began to discuss possible plans of action. Aidan immediately began to panic. I really didn't need this right now.
Strangely, neither of them asked to hear the details of my vision. I was kind of grateful for this. Never did I want to recount the terror I had seen in felt. I would not let the people I cared about disintegrate like that. For that was what was left of them, nothing more than ashes.
I kind of wondered why they did not ask. Perhaps they could tell by the expression on my face that what I had seen had been to terrible for words. I had caught sight of myself in the hall mirror, and if it was that, I didn't blame them. I could see it in my chocolate brown eyes. I looked terrified, and I couldn't help it because I was.
There was no reason they needed to have that imaged burned into their minds. I would never forget it. They did not need to carry that burden. It wasn't necessary that they heard the screaming over and over again. Although I had had the vision a good fifteen minutes ago, I couldn't get the screaming out of my ears. That burden didn't need to fall on them.
I leaned on Melinda's shoulder, and tried to shut my eyes as tightly as I could. It did not help block out my panicked thoughts. Every time I opened my eyes, even for a second, I saw the Grimoire. It was taunting me. That book was mocking me with what I knew. Suddenly I sat bolt upright. How could I have been so stupid? How could I have forgotten?
Slowly and cautiously, I backed away from that evil book. I pulled Aidan and Melinda away from it too. "Patience, what is it?" Aidan asked, his voice filled with concern.
"The source…the source's essence followed us in that book!" I yelled. My statement sounded so strange that it was almost comical. For a moment there was silence. Then all hell broke loose. The Grimoire on the table began to glow a sickening red. Melinda tensed ready to fight. Aidan created a protective circle of fire all around us. I knew it wouldn't protect us for long. And I just froze up.
The book spat out a dark shadow. That dark shadow quickly became the source. I could see it through the fire. We thought we had won that battle, at least temporarily. I knew it had been anti-climactic! I should have done something. This was my fault, and I had no idea how I could fix it.
Beside me Aidan had his eyes closed, concentrating. It took a lot of work for him to keep the fire going. For now it was worth it. For the moment at least, this was an obstacle the source couldn't penetrate. Melinda kept trying to blow him up. I fought the urge to tell her that it was useless. You couldn't destroy the source of all evil like this. We couldn't even destroy him. I doubted that we could if we wanted to, since we could barely stall him.
As Melinda and Aidan gave the source their best shot, I thought long and hard about what I could do. I needed to prevent what I had seen. If I just stood here and did nothing, my premonition would surely come to pass. There was only one logical conclusion I could come to. There was only one thing I could possibly do. I had to call upon my power, all of it. I didn't want to, but it was my only choice.
I was perhaps the only person alive who knew, or al least guessed, how much power I actually had. I had always known this, even though my mother had always kept this from me. I was probably the most powerful being alive, or who had ever lived. I didn't think this was me being a show off, it was just the truth. Combing one of the most powerful forces of good and one of the most powerful forces of evil had never been done, and I was the result.
To an outsider, it would appear that having all this power would be to my advantage. It was one thing to have the power, and it was another to actually use it. Melinda, who was nearly as powerful as I and with access to all her powers much longer, still didn't like using all the power she possessed. Accessing a power like that took a lot out of a person.
There was also a problem with too much power. If you used it too much, it could start to use you. Power, in is pure and basic form, made no distinction between good and evil. It hungered to be used, and it hungered to have control. It was simple. They say that ultimate power corrupts and consumes. What I have was the closest thing to ultimate power one person would ever get. It was one hell of a burden.
I didn't tell my cousin or my sort of boyfriend what I was going to do. I was in desperate need of their help, and they were less likely to help me if they knew the truth. Still I loved them, and it would be cruel to keep them completely in the dark. If I were to fail, which at this point was a possibility, we would all lose.
"I need to hold you hand. Both of you, quickly", I whispered. The fire was flickering, and Melinda was getting tired. I was sure that neither of them could keep this up any longer, and the source was getting closer. Aidan grabbed my hand immediately, but Melinda hesitated. She knew me long enough to know that I was planning something, and whatever it was, it might be a little dangerous. My plans usually were.
"Please trust me", I begged Melinda telepathically, "I promise I know what I'm doing." Her bright blue eyes met my dark brown ones. She grabbed my hand. I closed my eyes, letting myself feel all the power within myself. It was all there right bellow the surface, waiting to be freed. No 0only could I feel my own power, but I could feel that of Aidan and Melinda as well.
It was overwhelming. I wasn't Patience anymore. I was just a vessel for all this power now. Still, this vessel knew exactly what she was going to do with this. I had never done this before, but in theory, I should be able to. Theory was one thing, but practice was another thing all together. The source was heading for us now. He threw an energy ball at us. I concentrated my entire being on stopping it. It stopped in mid air and then disappeared.
Then I tried to visualize all the power I could feel and almost taste that was flowing through the three of us. I imagined it as a physical entity. A wall of the strangest light I had ever seen formed in front of us. It shimmered with every colour of the rainbow. It was a solid, a liquid, and a gas all rolled into one.
It wasn't a wall to destroy, only to stop temporarily. I knew that this would prevent the source from doing anything until we were safely back in our own time. However, it was taking all my energy just to keep it in existence, let alone make it move forward. It was taking the energy or Aidan and Melinda too. What I had feared had happened. Instead of us using the power, it was using us.
I concentrated on getting that wall to consume the source, to send him to some temporary purgatory. It had to happen as soon as possible. The longer it took, the more drained we became. Inch by inch, the wall moved forward. The source had no where to go. Soon it would be upon him, and we would rest.
At last, the wall consumed him. He screamed and he screamed, but I new he would not die. He would stay in this state of agony until our departure released him. Finally, he was gone. The room was eerily quiet. It was almost normal, which was strange in Halliwell Manor.
I looked at Aidan and Melinda. They looked utterly exhausted. What we had done…no, what I had done…had really taken a lot out of them. It had taken a lot out of us. I watched wide eyed as they both feel to the floor. What had I done? I hadn't meant to use that much. I hadn't known how much was necessary, nor how hard it would be to access it. The Grimoire was still on the table. It was open to a page with the heading 'To return time travelers to their own time."
We had done it, we had actually done it! Because of me, Aidan and Melinda couldn't enjoy our victory. They were lying on the floor unconscious, and who knew why. Speaking of which, I was starting to feel a little light headed. As the room spun around me, I wondered what I had done to myself. I fell to the floor in what seemed to be slow motion. Then the world went black.