Don't worry I have no notes for this chapter, except for the titles of the songs used, which are listed at the end of the chapter.
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Hogwarts University
Chapter 6 – Finding Inner Truths
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"Aikiko Utada?"
"Here."
"Ronald Weasley?"
"Here."
"Sabina Weilsey?"
"Present."
"Good you're all here." The young American professor smiled at the sleepy students in her class, her green eyes laughing. "For those who don't know me, I am Professor Sarah Rose. I'm originally from California and I went to Malgram School, Turtle house. Which would have made me a Ravenclaw if I had gone to Hogwarts, which I didn't. I apologize for this class' early hour, I know what it is like to prefer to get up at noon, however I didn't make the schedule, the college did, so we all get to suffer through it together. Now you will notice that there is a number 2 pencil placed on top of each of your desks. I want you to turn your pencils into first a rose, then a goblet, then an owl, then into a desk, and finally into a quill pen. This exercise will give me an indication of where you all are at as far as Transfigurations goes. Once I know all of your levels, we'll go from there. This class will be easy for some, and hard for others. If at anytime you find yourself not understanding a project either ask me during class, so that I can explain it to everyone, or during my office hours, when we can work together one on one. Hours are posted on my door, and whenever my door's open you are free to visit. I like to talk to my students, unlike some Professors… namely Snape. But enough of the speeches… have at it."
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"Severus what are you doing? Are you trying to commit suicide?" were the first words out of Alendi Dragnon's mouth when she walked into the Advanced Potions Lab after lunch on Tuesday. Severus, himself was sitting on a stool stirring a rather noxious looking potion.
Severus scowled at his old schoolmate with a look that would have sent her running had she not become immune to the effects many years prior. "This potion is to get rid of the singing spell."
There was a short knock on the door before Transfiguration professor, Sarah Rose entered and, having heard Severus' comment and seen him taste his noxious brew, made her own observation. "It doesn't look like it's working honey."
Alendi gave a devious smirk at her colleague behind Severus' back. "But if you do want to…" she let her sentence trail off knowing that the blank would be filled in by her listeners.
Severus glared at his long-time friend and answered her softly, "I don't have any friends. I'm in a dungeon. No one likes a man dressed all in black, who works for…"
Finally catching on to Alendi's idea Sarah interrupted Severus with a loud, "Hey!"
Smirking in triumph, Alendi started to sing, knowing that the only way to get Severus out of his depressed mood was to torment him with silliness. "Let's find a rock – I mean a big ass rock, or maybe something like a cinderblock is better. I'll hoist it up and drop it on your face, my buddy." Alendi leaned on Severus. "And just before the lights go out, you'll see my smile and you'll know you've got a friend, with a rock… who cares. I mean a big ass rock."
Leaning on Severus' other shoulder Sarah smiled and started her own verse. "Or rope. I got some quality rope. Made for a man who's devoid of hope like you are, my buddy… Severus –."
"That's Snape to you."
"Snape, right! And I won't leave you swinging there, twitching like a fish while you claw the air. I'll grab your feet and pal o' mine I'll pull real hard and snap your spinal cord."
Alendi moved away from Severus motioning for Sarah to do the same. "The world is cold when you're alone and they ignore you. But don't kill yourself…"
Leaning against each other the two women placed an arm around each other's shoulders and gave cheesy grins as they completed the verse together, "We'll do it for you."
Severus just sighed in aggravation and said sarcastically, "Oh, that makes me feel so much better."
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"Cast your eyes on the ocean, cast your soul to the sea. When the dark night seems endless, please remember me. Though we share this humble path, alone, how fragile is the heart? Oh give these clay feet wings to fly, to touch the face of the stars. Breathe life into this feeble heart. Lift this mortal veil of fear. Take these crumbled hopes, etched with tears. We'll rise above these earthly cares. Cast you eyes on the ocean, cast your soul to the sea. When the dark night seems endless, please remember me. Please remember me."
Dark eyes watched as the woman standing in the shallows of the lake sang her words gently, unforced by the curse placed upon her two nights before. Her voice lifted and fell noticeably with the emotions being placed into the words by her. A soft breeze rose to caress her cheek, as her last words fell from her full lips, lifting the ends of long wavy hair unbound from its customary braid. Turning she looked at her observer with a soft and yet sad smile. Beckoning to her side, she invited him to join her by the lakeside. "Come join me here and let me tell you a tragic tale of lovers joy and their betrayal. And tell me why you yourself have come to be here with me."
Moonlight caressed the young mans raven black hair as he stepped out from under the wide limbs of the university's ancient oak tree. He walked with elegance, his steps filled with a grace that an individual can only be gifted with at their birth. As he reached her side, he spoke for the first time, his words tinged with a sadness that bespoke of many years of demands being placed on too young shoulders. "I was laying in my bed and I couldn't help but think of how many I knew at Hogwarts who never got the chance to go to university. After a while I just couldn't stand to hear the sounds my roommates made as they slept. So I came out here. I didn't mean to interrupt your singing. It was quite beautiful."
"It's only beautiful because you understand what loss is. May I tell you the story behind my own sorrow?"
An elegant eyebrow rose in a high-reaching arch as his eyes caught the light showing that they were painted the purest shades of green. "If you want to."
"I knew your parents, long ago, when we were children ourselves. I loved James, more than any other, before, or since. This is how it seems to me: life is only therapy. Real expensive and no guarantees." When it looked as if he were about to interrupt, she lifted long artist's fingers to his pale lips as she silenced whatever remark he might have made. "Here is how love was to me. I could look and not see, going through the emotions, not knowing what they mean, and it scared me so much, that I just wouldn't budge. I might have stayed there forever if not for his touch. Oh, but he moved me, out of myself and into the fire. He moved me, burning with love and with hope and desire. How he moved me." Moving away from her companion she gazed across the lake once more. "He went whistling in the dark, making light of it, making light of it. And I followed with my heart laughing all the way." Pausing for a moment she collected herself, wiping a tear from her cheek. "So I went walking through the garden of temptation unaware. And I tasted what I wanted, not looking for the subtle warnings that might be hidden there, and I barreled though undaunted. Oh, I was seduced by a craving that left me defenseless."
When Alendi's voice trailed off, Harry moved away kneeling at the edge of the water letting his fingers skim the surface of the lake. As he watched the way the water rippled around his fingers, he murmured a line from a muggle song he had heard Hermione play once, "Hand in hand we're finding our way and today is just tomorrows yesterday."
"What?"
"So, you and my father were together during school." At her nod he continued, "and you were friends with my mother and the Marauders." Again she nodded. "Tell me."
"Lily was my best friend from first year on," Alendi's song was now tuneless as she struggled with the emotions brought to the forefront by Harry. "Severus I knew from my youth, my dearest friend and confidante, and James was my hearts first love. When Lily and James left us, we were both devastated. Severus became distrustful and bitterly angry, especially after you were born. You were supposed to be his."
Harry nodded thoughtfully. He'd have to spend a lot of time considering where he was going now and what he was going to do. This conversation brought more questions, but at the same time it answered so many, "I'm starting to understand."
"Understand?"
He nodded at Alendi's question. As he decided what he was going to tell her he stared off across the lake before speaking. "I've been changing, ever since my fifteenth birthday. I used to look just like my father, now I'm not sure whom I look like. Hermione refuses to believe that I might not be who I thought I was. Ron of course is oblivious, but I think he's seen it as well. For the past three years I've changed, my hair is longer and more manageable, and my temper has suffered. Ron says I remind him of Snape now, more than I ever did before I started changing, not that I resembled him before. Hermione says that she thinks that I've been showing the traits inherited from my mother. Remus says the same thing, but I just can't seem to believe them. Somehow Ron's claim of my resemblance to Snape makes more sense. But I just don't understand how it's possible given who he is and who my parents are. It doesn't make any sense."
Alendi sighed sorrowfully and placed a hand lightly on Harry's cheek, wiping away his tears. After a moment of her touch, his eyes closed and he moved forwards into the smaller woman's arms, taking the comfort his mother's friend offered freely. Her arms wrapping around the child she herself was denied by fate. "Maybe we were wrong," she murmured softly to the crying boy in her arms, "and maybe all this pain is a result of our loved ones just trying to protect us. And maybe you're not really who we've always thought you were."
Harry pulled back far enough to look into her face, before he nodded and moved back into the comforting circle of her arms. His response was muffled by her shoulder, "What do we do? Then… then how do we find the truth?"
Silence was his answer for several moments as Alendi tried to think of some idea. When she had one, she spoke softly sharing her Slytherin plot. "In potions tomorrow, I'll arrange for an accident or perhaps diversion is a better word. I'm sure that Severus will give you some extra credit project or another. I'll arrange for Lucinda's aid for you. In this little plot of ours we'll need a potion or two, and there'll be extra credit for you from me as well. I'll give you the ingredients list tomorrow and you can add it to whatever Severus gives you."
"You'd do that for… for me?" Harry said as he pulled out of her arms.
Placing her hand on his cheek again, she nodded. "You're my best friend's son. And I love you for it, if for nothing else. You're a child long denied the truth. And I'm going to find it for you. You're the son I never had, and I love you like you were my own."
Harry's eyes lit up at her words and a relieved smile spread across his face. "Thank you."
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Silence greeted Harry and Ron as they entered the Potions classroom the next morning. Professor Snape had his nose stuck in what appeared to be a very old potions textbook, his visage dark and unapproachable. This image was aided, in that he had the entire lesson for the day written on the blackboard at the front of the class, the words 'No Questions!' written across the top above the ingredient list.
Setting up quickly, Ron and Harry started work on the youth potion assigned to them. Sullenly Ron placed ingredients into the cauldron as he muttered under his breath about the unfairness of having Snape for a Potions professor for the eighth year in a row. His complaints only halted when he was jabbed in the side by Harry who was pointing to the door Professor Dragnon was entering.
Alendi entered Severus' classroom to see that all of the students had their heads bent to their own works. Seeing Harry and Ron working diligently she smiled, this would work perfectly with her plot. Mister Weasley was going to have quite the surprise when she acted. Slowly walking to the front of the classroom, her smile widened as she heard the whispers of the students cease as her footsteps were heard.
Severus' head shot up from his study of an ancient potions text to see Alendi walking across the room towards him, her black masters robes concealing her figure, unlike her usual robes which flaunted it. Glancing at the students he noticed that a third of them were watching the Potions Mistress and not their own work.
Catching a pair of bright green eyes with his own, he arched an eyebrow at the lack of hostility within them. Potter's eyes were contemplative with an edge of mischief to them. It was strange for Severus to catch any emotion in the boys eyes other than anger and pain, but then Potter wasn't that same spoiled child anymore. Severus doubted that he ever had been. When Potter had first arrived at Hogwarts, he had been a quiet, shy child, flinching whenever someone had moved too suddenly or spoke too loudly, cringing when others brought up the deaths of James and Lily. As he became older he opened up more, blossoming under the schools roof and professors care as a fragile moonflower blossoms under the gentle care of the moon. No matter how it hurt to watch the boy as he grew, Severus had and so he had noticed the subtle changes. Harry Potter was so much like his mother, having not only her brilliant emerald eyes, but also her gentle, almost Ravenclaw-like soul. It hurt to know him, but at the same time, he could not wish to have never known him. If he and Lily had had a child together, Severus would've wanted him or her to be like Harry.
"Good morning Severus," Alendi said softly, the curse still evident in her voice.
Responding with equal gentleness, Severus asked, "What are you doing up this early? You're disturbing my class."
"I just wanted to let you know that Severa Valfoy will be taking Potions with me as an independent class on Monday and Wednesday afternoons. However, before I let her know, I will need you to give me permission to do so."
"I'm the Potions professor here, I'll take care of the independent classes."
"Yes, well I thought that it would free up some of your time, so that you can focus on your work with the fourth year independent projects and your own research. And you know how much I've missed teaching Potions."
"Very well then. But if that is your desire, then you may also deal with my problem students."
"You'll let me choose their punishments?"
Severus scowled at the exuberance displayed by his one time schoolmate, "If you must."
Alendi pretended to consider it for a few minutes, half turning from Severus in order to watch the students working on their potions. "Extra Credit."
"What?"
"For those students who fail their daily potions. It would be a chance for those who aren't the best at potions to save their grades. Remember, Professor Winterrowd would do the same thing when we were students ourselves."
Severus nodded, "I remember. It'll do I suppose."
Alendi thanked Severus before she kissed him on the cheek and started to cross the room. Catching Harry's eye, she winked before she, as she passed, bumped into Ron's arm causing him to accidentally drop the ingredients in his hand into Harry's cauldron. Making a show of it, Alendi shook out her robes and checked her dragons-hide slippers for damage. "Oh, these silly robes, I'm always tripping on them." Smiling flirtatiously at Ron she continued, ignoring Harry's snickering. "But I'm sure you understand, don't you? I bet you always have some beautiful woman or another falling into your strong, masculine arms."
A small explosion interrupted Severus before he could reprimand Alendi for distracting one of his students. "Potter! Detention with Professor Dragnon! If you're going to blow anyone up it might as well as be her! See me after class for your assignment."
Alendi smirked, as she swept out of the room, her promise to Harry having been partially fulfilled.
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AN: Many of the songs used in this chapter are not ours, they belong to their respective owners. They are as follows: Big Ass Rock from the Broadway musical A Full Monty; Dante's Prayer by Lorena McKennitt; You Move Me, Blindside, and All Kinds of People preformed by Susan Ashton.