Down & Out

Thanks for reading this story. I hope you enjoy it. I've been thinking about this story, and I kind of want it to keep going but I'm not sure yet. I guess I'll just play it by ear/how people like the story and such. THIS ISN'T THE FINAL CHAPTER! just to let you know. I do not own anything, so please don't sue me.

Part Five: Why We Cry At Movies

Alex sat nervously in the hospital chair by Marissa's bed. It had taken her much persuasion to be let in at this hour, but when Alex set her mind on something she was determined to see it out. Eyeing the unconscious girl Alex felt pangs of pain in her heart. It literally hurt her to see Marissa like that.

Two hours later, Alex turned around at the sound of the door being opened. She watched Julie enter the room, and stop when she saw her. Alex stood, unsure of if she'd crossed some kind of line.

"Mrs. Cooper I…" Alex trailed off not sure of what to say.
"Alex, has she woken up?" Julie asked concern taking over.
"Uhm no…" Alex stammered surprised Julie had remembered her name.
"So what're you doing here?" Julie questioned taking a seat next to Marissa, and holding her hand.
"I…Well…Summer called me." Alex finished.
"Oh…Summer's been a good friend." Julie whispered looking at Marissa's almost lifeless body. "She comes in the afternoon and spends all day here."
"Mrs. Cooper how are you doing?"
"Honestly how do you think? I'm hanging in there, that's all I can really do."
"Would it be okay if I visited her?" Alex asked quietly, meeting Julie's gaze. "I mean not to like intrude or anything."
"You still care about her don't you?"
"I do." Alex answered honestly almost in audible.
"I'll talk to the nurse about letting you stay with her during the nights."
"Okay thank you, I guess I'll be seeing you." Alex said shutting the door quietly behind her.

Alex sat in her jeep, looking at the envelope in her hands. Placing it into the glove compartment box, she started the car and started driving to the only place that felt right. Arriving at the beach, she took the letter and began making her way to her usual spot.

Taking a seat on the sand, Alex pulled the envelope out of her pocket and held it gently, fearing the words it contained. After taking a few deep breaths, Alex slipped her finger under the seal and broke the flap. Pulling the papers out of the envelope, she began to busy herself by smoothing out the folds.

I had this dream tonight and I swear it was so real. I was walking, and I ended up at your old apartment, and all your stuff was there. And then you came in and just held me. When I woke up my hand was tingling, the one that held yours in my dream. I don't know if you know this or not, but I was at the William Beckett show. I was the one that squeezed your hand, and my boyfriend was the one that hit yours.

Alex stopped reading, and re-read the words. Marissa had thought that Decan was her boyfriend.

Tell him sorry for me, Kevin's kind of a jerk. I don't even really know what I'm doing with him. I guess he just makes me forget everything. But he doesn't make me forget about you, or what we had. No one can make me forget you.

You are the only person that can make me feel safe. I don't know if that makes much sense, but I just get this safe feeling when I'm with you. I know nothing bad can happen when we're together. I haven't been able to feel safe in a long time, and since you've been out of my life it's only prolonged.

"You touched my heart you touched my soul. You changed my life and all my goals. And love is blind and that I knew when, My heart was blinded by you. I've kissed your lips and held your head. Shared your dreams and shared your bed. I know you well, I know your smell. I've been addicted to you."

I listen to this song constantly because it reminds me so much of you and me. I don't know why I do it, when I was the one who 'ended' it. I wish I hadn't, and I wish I still had another shot with you. But it's asking too much, why would you want to go through something like that again?

I was selfish to let you go, and I'm selfish for telling you all this now. I just want you to know that I did love you Alex, actually I do love you. I know I never said it, but its true. To have to say it in this letter is cowardly, but it's the only way I know how to express myself. I don't deserve you, and I never did. You'll always be in my heart.

"Goodbye my lover. Goodbye my friend. You have been the one. You have been the one for me."

Alex looked down at the paper in her trembling hands. "God show me it's okay, give me a sign." She whispered looking up at the darkening sky. Small raindrops starting hitting the paper, and the top of Alex's head.

"Goodbye my lover. Goodbye my friend. You have been the one. You have been the one for me." Alex re-read the words, while tiny raindrops continued hitting her.

I currently have nothing written so far for the next installment so I'm going to work on that and blah. I hope you enjoyed this chapter it's LONGG but not that long so yep. Next chapter will be up sometime soon, depending on when I finish it. Please review!