Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. I couldn't think of something funny or interesting to put here so you'll have to hang your head low in sadness until I think of something next time.

A/N: I sadly only got to 40,360 words for NaNoWriMo, but it wasn't because I wasn't on time, it was because I finished my FanFiction! lol. So yeah…I don't feel so bad, but I would still like that certificate…

Published December 1, 2006

Chapter 14 - A Little Time to Think

"I don't think this is going to work, Tsunade." Shikamaru shook his head.

"Well, who asked you?!" Tsunade retorted.

"Uhh…you did?" Shikamaru said.

"Oh, yes, but hasn't anyone ever told you the teacher is always right?" Tsunade raised her chin up in victory.

"No…no, not really." Shikamaru said bluntly. "And you're not really my teacher."

Tsunade frowned. "Whatever! Just hold it already!" Tsunade ordered.

"Yeah, yeah." Shikamaru said, holding a magnifying glass. "How troublesome." Shikamaru muttered. "Why are we doing this again?" He asked because what he was doing was very juvenile.

"I've always wanted to do this and now I finally can!" Tsunade cheered. "Now hold it still!" She commanded Shikamaru.

"Okay, okay." Shikamaru said. 'Of all the Hokages, Tsunade has to be the weirdest one of them all, and I had to be her special assistant. What happened to Shizune?'

"Yes! It's working! I've always wanted to try this! I didn't think it could really work, but it can!" Tsunade jumped up and down with glee. "Yes, it's working! It's working! No! No! Don't go! No!" Tsunade pouted.

"I told you it wouldn't work." Shikamaru muttered loudly in an 'I told you so' tone.

"Hn." Tsunade glared in a 'shut up or else' kind of look. "Maybe it's your fault it didn't work." Tsunade pointed at Shikamaru.

"It's not. The sun isn't in the right position. The sun needs to be in the right spot correspondent to the magnifying glass to work." Shikamaru said in an 'as a matter of fact' voice.

"Hn." Tsunade glared at Shikamaru again. "At least I burned one ant." Tsunade said, looking down on the ground to see an ant which was black and crisp.

Shikamaru sighed. "How troublesome." He put his hands in his pockets.

"Let's go back inside and eat something. You're treating right?" Tsunade grinned at Shikamaru.

"But you're the Hokage. Shouldn't you be treating?" Shikamaru raised an eyebrow.

"Well, that would the 'Hokage'-like thing to do, but you know me, I am nothing like the other Hokages!" Tsunade pointed to herself with her thumb, grinning widely.

'She acts like Naruto more and more everyday.' Shikamaru thought. "Fine, I'll buy lunch."

Tsunade continued to grin. "I knew you'd see it my way!"

"Yeah, yeah. But we're getting something cheap. I'm saving up my money." Shikamaru informed.

"Ooh…what'cha savin' up for, Shikamaru?" Tsunade continued to grin.

'Grinning for so long can cause your face to get stuck that way.' Shikamaru remembered reading that from a book he read a long time ago. "It's none of your business…"

"But Shikamaru! I'm the Hokage!" Tsunade whined like a baby. "Hey! I'm the Hokage!" She realized. "Shikamaru, I order you tell me what you are saving up your money for!"

Shikamaru sighed. "How troublesome." He mumbled lazily. "My funeral."

"Nani (what)?" Tsunade wiped some earwax from her ear. 'Did I hear correctly? Am I growing old or something?' "Did you just say your funeral?"

Shikamaru nodded.

Tsunade's eyes widened. "You need help right away, Shikamaru! You're supposed to be a genius! Your girl problem isn't that big of a deal! Suicide is not the right thing to do in a situation like this! I'll get you help right away!" Tsunade grabbed Shikamaru's arm and ran with it, dragging Shikamaru.

"How troublesome." Shikamaru sighed. "Tsunade, I'm not committing suicide. I'm not going to kill myself. Ino or Temari is." Shikamaru clarified.

"Sure, that's what they all say!" Tsunade argued.

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"Troublesome woman…I can't even get a word around without her shouting it out to all of Konoha." Shikamaru sighed. "Why can't Tsunade just give me a break already?!"

"Ohayo gozaimasu (good morning), Shikamaru-san!" A lady with short black hair popped her head out from the door. It was none other than Shizune herself, with her pig in her arms, of course.

"Ohayo, Shizune." Shikamaru sighed. He didn't feel like talking to anyone at the moment.

"What's wrong? How was your day with Tsunade-sama? Did she do something strange again? Off task? Unorthodox?" Shizune asked, listing words describing many of her past times with Tsunade.

"She had me hold a magnifying glass so she could burn some ants." Shikamaru informed lazily.

Shizune shook her head with her fingertips on her forehead. "Not again! She has said she wanted to try that one out for a while now."

"Yeah…she told me." Shikamaru said.

"You watch the Science channel one time when they are talking about interesting tests to try at home and she goes crazy over these experiments." Shizune sighed. "She was supposed to be doing some more paperwork, but somehow persuaded me to let her take a break and watch TV. I should have warned you not let her go outside."

"Yeah, you should have." Shikamaru agreed.

"Did she ask for a meal afterwards?" Shizune assumed Tsunade's actions since she's been working with her for such a long time.

"Yeah, she asked me to pay for lunch, but we never made it to a restaurant." Shikamaru said.

"Why not?" Shizune asked curiously.

"I told her the meal had to be cheap because I am saving up money for my funeral. Then she assumed that I was going to commit suicide, so she gave me to a therapy session herself. Even though I told her over and over again that I wasn't thinking about committing suicide, she still went on with her therapy session." Shikamaru said in one large breath. "Very troublesome."

"I should have warned you about that as well…" Shizune laughed nervously. "I guess I should have prepared you for this."

"How do you live working with her every. Single. Day?" Shikamaru emphasized.

Shizune shrugged. "I don't know…I guess I'm just used to it."

"Please tell me you won't be running errands for a very, very, very long time." Shikamaru almost sounded like he was begging.

"Don't worry! It was just a one time thing. You won't have to take care of Tsunade for a while." Shizune assured Shikamaru.

"Domo (thank you)." Shikamaru said as he sighed a relieved sigh.

"So, Shikamaru-san…?" Shizune said.

"Yes?" Shikamaru asked.

"I heard that you have quite a predicament in your hands." Shizune said.

"Yeah?" Shikamaru asked again.

"Is it true?" Shizune asked to make sure her information wasn't false and just a rumor like all of the other rumors about Shikamaru and girls.

"Is what true?" Shikamaru wondered if Shizune knew the truth or just another fake rumor made up by Kiba or Naruto.

"Are Ino and Temari fighting over you?" Shizune asked.

'Damn it. How did she find out? Where does everyone find out about my personal life? Is there like a newspaper or something printing out people's personal secrets? Oh yeah, that's called a magazine…' Shikamaru thought to himself. "Yes. I guess you can say it that way." He said calmly.

"Oh…okay." Shizune said. "May I give you some advice?"

Shikamaru raised an eyebrow. "You want to give me advice? On what?" Shikamaru asked.

"On what to do. You haven't made a decision have you?" Shizune asked.

"No." Shikamaru answered.

"Then, I suggest that you talk to them, one by one, by yourself. Just the two of you. You can work things out and everything will be fine. It worked well for me." Shizune said.

"You've done this before?" Shikamaru asked.

Shizune panicked when she realized that she slipped up her secret. "What?! No, no. Not at all. Where did you get a silly idea like that?" She tried to stay calm, although she was very bad at it.

"But you just said…" Shikamaru started.

"Well forget what I said." Shizune ordered.

"But how will I…" Shikamaru started again.

"Just remember this; work things out with each of them one at a time and everything should work out. Okay?" Shizune said, hoping Shikamaru would forget whatever she had said before.

"Uhh…sure…whatever." Shikamaru shrugged. 'Too troublesome to try to figure out.' He convinced himself.

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'Everyone's giving me advice. Why?' Shikamaru thought as he stared up at the ceiling. 'Everybody wants to help me out but they can't. Everyone has different advice. Why should I trust them? They aren't geniuses in relationships? Maybe Tsunade was right on the idea of seeing a therapist…except not a suicide therapist.'

'This has to be one of the toughest decisions of my life. That's pretty sad. The hardest decision to make for me isn't about my family or work, but a date. A simple date…I can't even choose who to go out with for something as simple as a date. If only I were a cloud! I could be free and not have to worry about thinking and feelings or anything! I could just float in the sky and have the wind blow me away.' Shikamaru wished.

'Hopefully I will make the right decision, but who knows? I could choose Ino and find out later that I should have chosen Temari… I could choose Temari and find out later that I should have chosen Ino…I can't break up with one and go for the other…the one I break up with would hate me and the one I go after will think I'm in insincere jerk.' Shikamaru deduced.

'What am I going to do?! I'm already sixteen and I haven't been on a date yet. Maybe I should just take a fangirl or something.' Shikamaru said desperately.

'You can't be that desperate! That's just sad!' Shikamaru's inner-self told him. 'Your decision is only yours to make, but there has to be a right one!' His inner-self detailed.

'Well, maybe you're wrong.' Shikamaru told his inner-self.

'Are you crazy? Do you know who you are talking to? I'm your brain! The smart part of your brain! I am the one that knows everything!' His inner-self argued.

'Oh please! Don't listen to him! I am the one you should be listening to. I am the affectionate part of your brain. I know love and what to do about it.' The other part of Shikamaru's inner-self brain said.

'Shikamaru is not smart with love! I am the only intelligent thing Shikamaru has! Why should he listen to you?' Shikamaru's 'smart' inner-self said.

'At least I know something about love, unlike you! You are coldhearted! At least I am kind.' Shikamaru's 'affectionate' inner-self argued.

'Okay you two. Stop fighting. I don't care what you guys think. Well I do care. I just don't want you two troublesome voices to argue in my head. When I can think of a solution, I'll use it, so just go away.' Shikamaru said in his head.

'Someone's a little touchy today.' Shikamaru's 'affectionate' side said.

"Yup. Definitely on the touchy side.' Shikamaru's 'smart' side agreed.

"Hn. Troublesome brain." Shikamaru said.

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A/N: I think it was kind of confusing with Shikamaru and his two selves. Yeah, so yeah…I'll upload the next chapters soon…it's late so I'll probably go to sleep before I can upload the rest of the chapters.