I sat in Pizza Hut, waiting for Jake to show up. Knowing what had been said at school, he probably stood me up.

He finally showed up 10 minutes later.

"I'm sorry I'm late," he said. I noticed he didn't offer an explanation.

"I think we both know why we're here," I started. He looked out the window.

"Yeah. The rumors are true, aren't they? You're leaving me hanging for a drumline guy, right?" He sounded a little mad, but he also sounded like he expected everything.

"Well, I wouldn't have phrased it nearly that harshly. I'm not really leaving you hanging. We're both here, talking about it. We can both end it together," I said. I was really uncomfortable discussing this. I'm sure he was even worse off.

"Well, basically that's what you're doing. I don't think there's anything I can do to make you want to go back out with me, is there?" he said. His delicious honey voice was crackling. I hoped he wouldn't cry.

"Not right now, no. But if things don't work out between Brodie and me I'll definitely consider. I like you, Jake."

"Obviously not enough to be my girlfriend." The crackling had subsided a little, but he sounded sad and heartbroken still yet.

"Jake, tons of girls would love to have the opportunity to date a nice, sweet guy like you," I said. It was true. He is the star of many girls' dreams and daydreams.

"I'm a popular jock. Girls do flock to me, but only because I am a popular jock. Sure, girls want to date me. But the only girl I even see is you. I really, really like you, Darcy." That just hit something inside me. I felt like someone had grabbed my heart and made it see that I'm not the awkward 7th grader I was a few years back. I've grown up and guys have grown up right along with me. They don't simply want to date the popular girls. They want to date different types of girls. Girls like me.

"I know you do. I really like you too, but I just don't see anything happening with us when I have feelings for Brodie." I couldn't say anything better.

"Well, 'the best part of believe is the lie'," he said, quoting one of my favorite Fall Out Boy songs. He stood up and walked out before we could even get food. I wouldn't have been able to eat anyway. The lump in my throat would have prohibited that.

I got back to my house as quickly as possible. My mascara was running and my eyes were puffy. I sat down on my bed, then gradually moved down under the covers. I turned on my stereo so that no one could hear me cry.

I wasn't crying because I had lost Jake, but because I had broken his heart. I never thought I could do something like that. I never thought I would do something like that. I felt like a total idiot, even though I couldn't really do anything else. I love Brodie.

I wasn't even worried about my reputation as an ungrateful heartbreaker. Jake probably wouldn't tell anybody anyway. And not just because of his jock status.

I changed that night. I don't really know how to explain it. I guess it was a gradual process though, with band and high school and everything that goes along with the two. I just realized it that night.

I thought about calling Brodie, but he would be mad that I was crying over Jake. I wasn't even really crying over him though, he was just the last step of the realization process. I couldn't call Hannah either. She wouldn't get it. I really considered calling Amanda, but even with all the stuff she knew, she couldn't have known what was going on with me.

For the first time probably ever, I felt totally alone.

Yeah, it's short. But I didn't think I should waste as many words here as I usually do. Does that make any sense? I hope so. Read & Review pleeeese..