Scene 7
Weathertop. Night.
ARAGORN: This was once the great watch-tower of Ammon-Sul.
PIPPIN: (drool of stupidity) Tomorrow I shall try to think about socks with blue stripes. Yellow stripes are not as blue.
ARAGORN: Never mind.
FRODO: But Aragorn, it's a big conspicuous rock that can be seen for miles around. How are we going to find a hiding place from the Nazgul there?
ARAGORN: Shut up fool, it's in the script.
SAM: Well, if this is in the script, let's, let's…
PIPPIN: KILL THE SCREENWRITERS!!
MERRY: CHARGE!!!!
PRODUCER: (V.O) No, no, don't kill us… kill Donald Trump!!
All charge at FRODO.
FRODO: NOOO!!
DUMBLEDORE: Alas, nine sickles and a dung bomb. Today is my lucky day!!
ALL:??
DUMBLEDORE: At least I'm not wearing a man-dress!!
GANDALF: HEY!
FRODO: Don't look now, but all the noise has attracted something…. It looks pink… and sparkly… it's… John Kerry in a dress!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
ARAGORN: You idiot, that's the Nazgul!! And who the heck is John Kerry???
MERRY: No one of importance. And anyway, they're practically the same thing.
FRODO: (Intervening clears throat) Shall we run for our lives?
SAM: Oh yes let's.
All run away, screaming.