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Chapter 7: Gaara's First Joke
At the entrance of Suna
Temari caught Naruto in her arms before he fell to the ground. When she first saw him dash into the village her first thought was to beat the crap out of him, but then she saw how terrified and tired he looked, so she decided to let him be for now. She saw the relief on his face before he lost consciousness and was happy at the fact that he felt comfortable around her.
She completely forgot about the fact that there was supposed to be a GROUP of people coming and was about to leave when a total of five girls skidded into view.
"Give Naruto-kun to me now!" they all said in unison. Then, glaring at each other, shouted "He's mine!" or "Leave him alone!" and similar comments at each other. Soon the swearing and shouting turned into punches and kicks, biting and scratching.
Temari, who was shocked at their behavior, said "What the hell is all this about?" to Neji, Sasuke and Sakura who had just arrived on a large toad with Jiraiya. Jiraiya grinned mischievously.
"Well you see, I set up a contest that who ever could catch Naruto before he reaches the village will get to share a room with Naruto during our short stay." he said looking at Hinata, who was pulling Ino's hair in an un-Hinata-ish way.
"What?" said Temari confused, tightening her hold on Naruto like he was her firstborn son.
"Yep." said Jiraiya happily. "But since he ran so hard, no one caught him so he'll have to stay with all of them at once. While Temari was still trying to absorb the information, Sasuke was watching the five girls's half assed fighting with distaste and smirked when Neji received a punch in the face from Hinata when he tried to pry her off Ino.
Many villagers (which were mostly males.) had come to watch the fighting and soon were cheering them on, wanting to see clothes ripped off. Then suddenly the sand under the girl's feet rose up and trapped the five girls easily, pulling them apart.
"What's going on?" said Gaara tonelessly appearing next to Sasuke from who knows where. Sasuke jumped and almost fell on his butt, but caught himself just in time because he was too cool to do so.. He hadn't forgotten how easily Gaara had beaten the shit out of him the last time they met. Gaara looked at Temari who had Naruto in her arms.
"Ah, so you snagged Naruto already. Good, since we leave tomorrow and we have four extra …guests… Naruto will stay in your room while the rest cram into the room that I prepared for the two green weirdoes that didn't turn up." he said or rather commanded in that same toneless voice.
"What!" cried the girls who were trapped in the sand. "No fair! Me want to be a room with Naruto-kun!" shouted Tenten who was struggling trying to get out of the sand.
Temari couldn't resist. She SO wanted to annoy them and since they were currently trapped in sand, they can't do a thing to stop her. She smirked and started to cuddle Naruto like he was a teddy bear, which were making the girls extremely jealous. Then they gasped as she planted a kiss on his cheek, and then slowly proceeded to kiss him on the lips when Naruto woke up.
"Hi, Temari." he mumbled oblivious to the fact that Temari's face was just a few inches away from his. Temari jumped and lost her balance. She fell backwards, and since Naruto was being held by her, he fell too. Temari managed to flip Naruto so he would hit the ground (or rather sand) first and she landed on top of him.
"Ouch! Why did I land in the sand first?" mumbled Naruto annoyed as he tried to sit up but found that he couldn't move because Temari was on top of him. Temari sniggered and held on tightly, not letting Naruto get off.
"Get off me Temari your heavy!" said Naruto but he regretted it at once when he saw that Temari's eyes had suddenly turned fiery fed and she started clenching her fists dangerously.
"Are you calling me fat?" asked Temari in a VERY threatening voice. Naruto gulped.
"Uh... of course not! You're not heavy at all! It's just that you are on top of me and I need to get up." he managed to stutter out the words. Temari's fury seemed to vanish in an instant and she got off Naruto, pulling him up too by his arm.
"Thanks!" said Naruto and he stretched, but since he was so drained from all the running in the hot desert, he lost his balance easily and fell into Temari who caught him and held onto him tightly saying "You okay?" in a worried tone.
"Yeah I feel like a bowl of ramen!" he said stupidly still in Temari's arms. Temari giggled at his stupid comment and helped him stand again, But Naruto lost balance again and Temari had to catch him again (Not that she minded getting to hold Naruto in her arms).
Sighing, she said "Seems that you're drained of chakra. You must have been running very hard away from those girls." while ruffling his hair which was one of the many things she liked to do to Naruto.
"Yeah…" mumbled Naruto unaware of what the soft pillow he was resting his face against was as he fell asleep, breathing in Temari's sweet scent. Gaara was a bit impatient because the girls looked very furious and his sand prison and was already cracking while Temari was having fun with Naruto's hair.
"Okay, let's get to your rooms. Temari, drag Naruto to your room and try not to rape him before dinner." he said hastily and he walked off towards the Kazekage's tower, lifting the five furious girls into the air in front of him.
Temari motioned to Jiraiya and the others to follow and she hoisted Naruto onto an armored toad Jiraiya summoned and they set off, with Neji rubbing his red nose and the frog complaining about dehydration.
About ten minutes of walking later, they arrived at their resting place and Temari dragged Naruto into her room, murmuring "Looks like we'll have to share a bed" loud enough for the five trapped girls to hear before closing the door smirking.
Gaara hastily threw the five furious girls into their rooms and blocked the doors with sand before they can damage anything outside. "Dinners at seven in the room through that door." he said pointing at a big green door before disappearing to watch some TV. Sasuke just stood there looking bored while Jiraiya chuckled evilly as he knocked on Temari's door.
"Yes?" said Temari opening the door. Jiraiya saw that Naruto was dumped on the floor next to a futon which was purple with lots of green froggies.
"Naruto's pack is here and remind him to take a shower when he wakes up." said Jiraiya handing her an orange backpack. "Anyway play safe." he said putting a small black box on top of the bag before disappearing with a poof sound and some smoke.
Temari looked at the black box curiously and closed the door leaving Sasuke, Neji and Sakura (the ones who have a bit of sanity left in their head) alone again.
"Well let's get to our rooms and get some rest." said Sasuke and the other two nodded and went to their rooms. Sasuke picked up his bag, and walked past Temari's room to get to his own. He heard some weird ripping noises and Naruto's moans of "more…" and "don't stop…"
He quickly opened the door of his own room and went inside, bolting the door shut blocking Naruto's moans.
"Stupid dope dreaming again…" muttered Sasuke putting his bag in a corner. 'But why is there ripping noises…he can't be doing 'it' with Temari can he? ...Na…he's too dumb to even know what it is called. He smirked remembering something that happened a few weeks ago at a mission.
Flashback
They were at their usual meeting place waiting for Kakashi to arrive.
"Sasuke-kun what's it like to have sex?" asked Sakura trying to sound as tempting as possible. Sasuke looked at her bored.
"Even though I went to Orochimaru and spent a lot of time there, I haven't been forced to breed the Sharingan for him nor had sex with any other people so I don't know." he answered dully.
"Do want to find out sometime? I' m really curious how it feels like and want to try 'it'." she said lustfully.
"No." said Sasuke flatly looking away.
"Hey, I can have sex with you if you want, Sakura-chan. I tried it before and it is really fun. I can let you ride me all day long!" he said happily before being punched into air by Sakura who shouted "PERVERT!"
Naruto landed with a small crash a few meters from Sasuke, who was gaping at Naruto for being so bold. He had thought Naruto didn't even know what having sex meant.
"What was that about!" said Naruto rubbing his sore cheek. "It's not like its bad or anything. I do it all the time with small kids when I was traveling with Ero-sennin." Sasuke and Sakura were wide-eyed and looked positively horrified at what their stupid teammate had just said.
"Y-y-you d-did THAT to s-s-mall KIDS?" Sakura exclaimed backing off slightly.
"Yep! I have lots of experience and can prevent you from sliding off while riding Me." he said in a saintly voice very proudly. Then there was a loud puff of smoke that announced their teacher's arrival.
"Yo!" said Kakashi as he appeared before Sasuke and Sakura. He then saw the looks of utter horror on their faces as they stared at Naruto who was caressing his cheek.
"What's up? Did Naruto do something stupid again?" he said putting away his precious Icha Icha Paradise (Which is an EXTREMELY rare sight.).
Seeing that Sakura couldn't seem to speak, he motioned to Sasuke to be the one to tell him. But even his voice shook slightly as he tried to remain calm.
"Well Sakura asked me if I'd like to have sex with her…" he was cut off by Kakashi who said "and you accepted but just when you pinned Sakura against a pine tree in the beach and started ripping her clothes off." Sasuke tried to interrupt but Kakashi ripped out his book again and opened it, continuing
"But then Naruto saw you and shoved a kunai with a wrapped explosive note up your behind and blew you up because he was jealous. Just like in the book." he finished, before receiving a whack from Sasuke (Sakura was still standing there looking dumbstruck at Naruto.).
"There are no beaches around here and I REFUSED to do 'it' with her." said Sasuke loudly before continuing his explanation. "After I said no to Sakura Naruto offered to do 'it' with her…" he was interrupted by Kakashi again who said "He did what?" with wide eyes.
"That's not all…" said Sasuke shuddering. "He said he had done it a lot of times BEFORE with small KIDS, and…" Sasuke didn't get to say another word because Kakashi had zipped off pinned Naruto to a tree and tied him up.
"Is it true that you had sex with smaller kids?" he asked Naruto seriously. Naruto nodded, asking "Why did you tie me up sensei? Did I do something wrong." his eyes widened in horror. "You found out that it was me who switched all your music CDs with CDs of Lee singing!"
"You did?" said Kakashi questioningly. "But my CDs sounded fine and were normal." Naruto thought for a moment. "Oh…" he said. "No wonder my CDs sounded like Lee singing… I must have changed them with my CDs by mistake."
Kakashi sweat dropped, but decided not to comment on that matter, continuing instead on the current problem. "Naruto, you know that you are under age and shouldn't have sex, especially with kids who don't know what there doing."
Naruto looked confused. "Why is having sex not good for underage people like me? It's really fun and I hear that the more you are like a horse, the better people enjoy it."
Kakashi looked a bit shocked at the information, but continued "Even so, a 15 year old boy shouldn't do this just yet, you could get AIDS and infect the people you have sex with it too. You might be big but still…"
Naruto interrupted him. "I'm already very big and can do it smoothly. Here, let me show you." He cut himself from the tree with a kunai and prepared to do whatever he is doing. Sakura snapped to her senses and clapped her hands over her eyes and backed off a bit, but Naruto said "I'll need you to help Sakura-chan." and ran over.
Sakura cried "No!" but Naruto leapt on her, pinning her to the ground. Kakashi was about to intervene when Naruto started forming hand seals.
"Henge-no-jutsu!" he shouted and turned into a…
"Horse?" said Sasuke, Sakura and Kakashi together. The horse was red and was indeed, very big. "Sakura-chan, get on and I'll show you." said Naruto, which was the horse.
She got on and Naruto started trotting around with Sakura on his back. A few minutes later Naruto was back in human form again and he was looking smugly at the others. "See? I could turn into a big horse and Sakura-chan didn't fall once. She could ride me all day and it will still be the same.
The others stared at him for a moment, before Kakashi said uncertainly "Naruto, do you know what have sex means?"
Naruto looked at him shocked. "Of course I do! Who wouldn't know what having sex is, people talk about it all the time!" he said looking at Kakashi as if he was mad. "Then why did you show…" Naruto talked over him "It means riding a horse of course! They think that saying 'riding a horse" is too troublesome so they call it 'having sex'!"
Looks of understanding dawned upon Kakashi, Sakura and Sasuke's faces. Naruto wasn't an under-aged-kid-fucking-sex-loving-maniac-with-blond-hair, he was a complete dumb ass who doesn't know one bit about how he sounded like a complete psycho when he talked about "having sex" without knowing what he was talking about.
"Naruto…" said Kakashi slowly.
"Yes, sensei?" said Naruto.
"You need… 'The Talk'...right now, and your teammates are helping me explain this too." he said seriously.
"What's that?" asked Naruto and Sasuke fell over while Sakura blushed a deep shade of red.
"Shouldn't someone else tell him about that?" Sakura asked nervously "Like his pa…" then she remembered that Naruto had no parents, and stopped at once because she saw a flicker of sadness in Naruto's eyes at the reminder that he had no one he could call Mother or Father.
"We are his teammates and have a responsibility to teach each other things, so Naruto would understand them as well as us." said Kakashi seriously.
So that afternoon the mission was cancelled and Team 7 dragged Naruto to a private place to give him "The Talk".
End Flashback
Sasuke smirked again at the memory of the incident, Naruto was blushing red by the end of it and was extremely shocked at the fact of what "having sex" was. Sasuke took out some fresh clothes and set off to the Bathhouse to take a bath.
Inside Temari's room
Temari was busy ripping off the strangely cloth-like three layered wrapper off the black box Jiraiya gave her when she heard Naruto moaning. She walked over to him and sat down, looking at his face curiously and noticing how he was drooling slightly.
She blushed a deep shade of red when she caught words like "…want…more" and "…don't…stop…it..." giving her mental images of Naruto under her, begging her to… She shook the thought out of her mind.
She leaned closer, curious at what he was doing in his dream, though she thought she had a pretty good idea of what he was doing in his dream, and wanted to know who he was dreaming of.
Hoping that she was the one he was dreaming of, her heart sank when she heard the name "Ayame…" and tears formed in her eyes. She was about to wake him up forcibly and confess her love to him when she heard him mumble "…ramen…make...more…ramen…don't…stop…want…more…ramen…"
She smiled and whipped the tears out of her eyes, thinking why she got so emotional where Naruto was concerned.
She then remembered about the small black box and took out a kunai. She cut off the wrapping, and looked at the cover. It read "Condoms for the energetic, extra durable and comes in different flavors." Temari blushed again and stuffed the black box out of sight.
She looked over at Naruto and saw him stirring. "Awake yet you sleepy head?" she said giggling slightly as Naruto sat up, looking at her with unfocussed eyes. Then, without warning "TEMARI!" he shouted happily and flung his arms around Temari's waist pulling her into a tight hug, making the said girl blush deeper than before.
"Good to see you Temari! I missed you so much!" he said happily showing no signs of wanting to let go of her. Temari didn't mind though, she liked his hugs, they made her feel warm (and aroused) inside…did she even have to mention that Naruto was very cuddly too? She breathed in the smell of his hair, noticing that there was a strange but nice smell, it was very nice and she tightened her arms around him, getting a weird feeling.
Then she remembered what Jiraiya said. Reluctantly, she broke the hug and said "Naruto, Jiraiya told you to take a shower when you wake up."
Naruto nodded, and was about to ask something, but Temari answered before he even asked. "Yes, you can. And I'm coming with you too because there is lot's of catching up to do."
Naruto nodded and they grabbed some fresh clothes, Naruto grabbed Jiraiya's 'special shampoo' and set off to the private hot springs. "Gaara just got fired by the council but Baki let me have the hot springs to myself anyway, so consider yourself lucky that you didn't have to go to the bathhouses with that pervert." said Temari.
"WHAT? Gaara got FIRED!" said Naruto in disbelief. "Yep, but were going to stay at Konoha so I'll get to see you more often, so that's not too bad is it?" replied Temari who realized what she just said and blushed a bit. Naruto wanted to ask why he was fired but stopped at a stern look from Temari.
They arrived at the hot springs and went to the showers. They took a quick shower (separately) and went into the hot springs. Like last time they were back to back and were talking about the stuff that happened since the last time they met.
"This feels so comfortable…" said Naruto lazily leaning against Temari's back blushing a bit at the nice feeling he got. Temari too was enjoying the feeling and was blushing even harder than Naruto because unlike Naruto, she had peeked a few times and saw a good deal of flesh.
Then without warning, Naruto turned her around and pressed her into him, so that they were chest to chest. Temari blushed so red that she looked like a tomato with blonde hair. "Wha?" was all she could say because she was lost in the feeling.
She didn't notice Naruto grab a large towel from the edge of the spring and wrapped it around themselves, saying "Sorry, I'll explain later but we have to get covered up and get out and dress now." she only nodded and they got up (with difficulty because they were wrapped together) and went to the changing rooms.
They dressed quickly and then Temari asked "Why did you…you know?" shyly still very red. Naruto, who was equally red, said "I sensed one of Ero-sennin's tracking toads nearby and it was communicating to Ero-sennin.
We had to get out quickly because Ero-sennin was approaching a high speed and I didn't have time to warn you. Sorry that I peeked." Temari felt even more embarrassed.
"It's all right… I sort of peeked too…" she mumbled playing with her fingers looking at the floor. "Liked what you saw because I certainly did." said Naruto nervously.
Temari was so red that she looked like she was going to explode and shouted "You little perv!" and leapt at him, pinning him to the floor shaking him up and down.
Laughing, Naruto pulled Temari down on top of him and hugged her again, saying "There's the Temari I know, I think I like normal Temari better, don't you?" while grinning like an idiot.
Temari smiled and hugged him back, still on the floor until someone said "Aww… how lovely…" in a sarcastic voice. They looked up and saw Gaara standing in the doorway. He spoke again.
"Dinner started twenty minutes ago and because you two were late I accidentally told the other girls that you two were alone in the private hot springs bathing together.Hnn... I wonder how that sounded..." Naruto and Temari both blushed red again and quickly got off each other and followed Gaara to the …uh…where ever they are eating.
As soon as Naruto stepped through the green door, he was almost sent flying backwards out of it as Kankuro sent his duo puppets flying at him. "What was that for?" shouted Naruto who had hidden behind Temari who was still a bit red from the incident."
"Is it true that you dragged Temari into the hot springs and did 'it' there?" he said venomously, trapping naruto between his two puppets. Naruto and Temari blushed fiery red and looked quickly at Gaara, who looked emotionless as always.
"Yes, I saw them with my own eyes." he said dully, but when Kankuro made to summon his giant puppets to squash Naruto, quickly added "I was joking." in that same emotionless voice.
There was silence. Kankuro dropped the scrolls he was holding while Temari just stared with her mouth open.
"You joked." said Naruto in disbelief after a while.
"So?" was Gaara's reply.
Finally realizing what their little brother had just done Temari and Kankuro gasped in unisen, and quickly ran off somewhere. The others had barely begun to exchange confused glances when they came back holding bottles of sake.
"Hurray! Let's celebrate Gaara's first joke!" they shouted putting the bottles on the table and putting on party hats. Then they started blowing stuff up with mini explosive tags to create some noise. After seeing everybody else stare at them in awe, Temari coughed and said "Let's just treat this like Haloween. The others nodded and she pulled out some party hats and baloons.
Soon everyone was drinking, eating and talking loudly.
After eating dinner, Kankuro decided to play a game of Truth or dare. The others were all tipsy so they just agreed to stop him shouting loudly at them on purpose to annoy them into submission.
"Ok..." said Kankuro in triumph.
"I'll start things off." said Gaara, surprising everyone.
"Temari, truth or dare?"
"Huh?" said Temari, who was wobbling in her seat. "Um... Dare." she said.
"I dare you to kiss Naruto every time someone chooses truth for the remainder of the game. said Gaara after thinking for a while.
"Wha?" said Temari, looking embarassed and angry at the same time. Naruto was surprised too but couldn't say anything about it because the other girls started shouting "What? No fair!!".
"Then don't choose Truth then." said Jiraiya smugly as he had just figured out Gaara's plan.
The girls huffed in annoyance and Temari turned to Sakura, who was on her right.
"Sakura, Truth of Dare?"
Sakura thought for a moment, before saying "Dare... I don't want to see the other girls ripping each other apart."
"Okay..." said Temari. " I dare ya to...slap Sasuke in the face." she said smirking at the look of horror on Sakura's face and the annoyance on Sasuke's.
"Good one Tem-chan!!" shouted Naruto in glee as he laughed his ass off as he saw Sakura slap Sasuke, who went through the wall because Sakura was too embarassed and used too much power. Sasuke came through the door 3 minutes later with a look that promised payback. He shot a glare at Temari who was too busy blushing at Naruto's nickname for her to notice.
"Uhh... My turn now." said Sakura. "Kurenai-sensei, Truth or Dare?"
Kurenai thought for a moment. If she picked Truth, Temari would kiss Naruto, but Dare would mean something nasty and embarassing. But Truth meant Temari kissing Na...OK Dare it is... But Naruto is affecting me too much... I don't like him that way but I lost control a while ago... What could this mean? I remember Some strange and nice smell, but Naruto doesn't know Genjutsu...Hhmmm...
"Sensei?" said Naruto looking worried. "Are you okay?" he touched her forhead checking her temperature, making the other girls minus Sakura seethe in jealosy.
"Yeah... I choose Truth." said Kurenai regaining some control over herself. She had felt something strange when Naruto touched her, but couldn't pinpoint what it was because the contact had been short. But she couldn't help but feel jealous when Temari reluctently kissed Naruto on the cheek blushing.
"Okay sensei..." Said Sakura who was still a bit worried. "What were you thinking about when you zoned out?"
Everybody looked expectantly at Kurenai as she thought on how to answer.
"I was wondering why I suddenly found myself more attracted to Naruto than normal recently." she said blushing at her own words.
Everybody in the room simply stared with their gaws on the floor when they heard the confession.
"Uh..." said Naruto not knowing what to say or think.
"Okay my turn." said Kurenai quickly and turned to Naruto.
"Naruto, Truth or dare?" Naruto regained his senses.
"Huh? oh um... Da..." he was cut off by Gaara who said "Naruto, Choose dare and you will be killed by my sand." in his calm emotionless voice.
"Wha? No fair, Gaara!!" shouted Naruto, but instantly said "Truth! I choose Truth!!" when sand started approching him.
Kurenai decided to check something out and asked "Are you using any methods to attract more attention of the opposite sex?"
The crowd stared intently at Naruto and waited his answer, especially the girls and Neji, Sasuke didn't give a darn about Naruto's love life but was interested too.
"Of course not!" said Naruto jumping up. "I was scared to death when you guys did what you did!"
Kurenai nodded and motioned for Naruto to sit back down.
"Gaara! Truth or Dare!" said Naruto with a manic grin on his face.
"...Truth. That's two kisses you owe Naruto Temari." said Gaara.
After being kissed on both cheeks and blushing red, Naruto said "Gaara! Why did you get fired?" before being bonked on the head with a pink hammer by a blushing Temari (from kissing Naruto on the cheeks) saying "Shut up idiot!"
"I burned my paperwork and told them that I knew they were gay. And Temari you told him didn't you." said Gaara to the shocked table. "So now, payback." he said calmly.
"Ino, Truth or dare?"
Ino was surprised that she was called, but said "Dare." not wanting to see her cru.. I mean friend being kissed by Temari.
"I dare you to make out with Jiraiya..." he was cut off by Ino's scream of "WHAT??!!" and Jiraiya's yell of "OH YEAH!! COME ON BABY!!!"
"Unless Naruto kisses Ino..." he was cut off again this time be Tenten and Temari's shout of "Why Naruto!" and Naruto's own shout of "You shouldn't make Ino kiss just anybody!"
"...on the lips." finished Gaara looking at Ino who was dumbstruck at his dare.
Ino was blushing, hard. She really liked Naruto, having gotten to know him a bit better after the first Sasuke retrieval mission. She had visited him one day and had ended up talking to him for hours and hours. He was a really good listener, and paid attention even to the pointless things she told him about her life even though he was wrapped like a mummy. He even gave her some good advice. She didn't see much of him after he left hostpital but couldn't stop thinking about him ever since. And three years later he came back a handsome guy, successfully upgrading her occasional wet dreams to a whole new level. She never got a boyfriend either because she never paid attention to other guys.
Ino was brought back to earth when she felt warm breath on her face. She saw Naruto's hesident face in front of hers and could hear Jiraiya's shouts about betrayal and the girl's shouts about perverts but ignored them.
Seeing that Naruto was about to pull back to argue more with Gaara, she quickly took her chance and leaned forward, placing her soft lips over his, kissing him tenderly. A shocked silence followed, and Ino pulled back quickly, blushing deeper by the second. "My first kiss..." she thought wildly.
Tenten, Temari, Hinata and Shizune were burning with jealosy, as well as Jiraiya and Kankuro, while Neji, Sasuke and Kurenai just stared dumbly at Naruto who just gaped at Ino's pretty face, blushing red.
"Naruto, you still need to kiss Ino, you know..." stated Gaara. Making The girls yell "What!? Why?"
"I said Naruto kiss Ino, not the other way around," replied Gaara, ignoring the glares of the girls.
Naruto was about to speak when Ino leaned in and kissed him again, this time licking his lips shyly before retreating, her face turning extremely red at her own daring.
"...You know... Naruto still has to kiss Ino you know..." stated Gaara after a minute of silence in the room.
Too stunned to speak, Naruto just leaned towards Ino and kissed her gently on the lips before retreating back into his seat quickly.
"Good..." said Gaara, either not noticing the weird atmosphere or completely ignoring it. "Ino, your turn..."
Ino didn't respond, staring at Naruto with misted eyes. Naruto, red in the face and was staring back at Ino, an embarassed silence filling between them while the others just watched shocked.
Thinking that they would be better off unconsious, Gaara took out the pink hammer and knocked both of the blondes out. The silent spell seemed to break and Tenten managed to say "What the hell was that about?"
The others nodded and JIraiya said "The start of a wonderful love story full of fluff and romantic poems! ...What the hell? I actually said that!? Let me correct my mistake. It is the start of a wonderful relationship of S&..." Gaara chucked the pink hammer at him and knocked him out.
Since Naruto was out cold on top of Ino, who showed no signs of being able to take her turn, the others decided to stop playing the game and get drunk to try to forget about this incident. Sasuke mumbled something about payback next time before starting downing bottles of sake. Soon everyone apart from Gaara were asleep with bottles of sake around them.
Gaara stood up and looked around, making sure they were all asleep. After double checking, he retrieved four video cameras from different angles of the rooms. Smirking, he swiched one on.
He watched in amusement as a woken and now drunk Jiraiya argued with an equally drunk Sasuke about woman while a sloppy Sakura hung on to Sasuke's every word, taking notes on a piece of crumpled paper with a chopstick, though no one would recognize what the scribbling meant anyway because after a while Sakura knocked over some sake on the sheet and ruined the marks on it.
Tenten and Shizune were drunkenly singing a song about ice-cream while Hinata was comforting a sobbing Neji, who apparently was letting his heart out. He was slurring out stuff like "Sseee (sob) ssheee lipes L-larutooo (sob) aannd d-doesssnt (sob) lipe weee emymoreeeee!" he burst into loud tears again and buried his face in his arms, Hinata trying to comfort him even though she didn't understand a thing he said.
Gaara switched off the video camera and put them away. After a while, Naruto stirred and sat up clumsily.
Naruto looked at Gaara, who was drinking some water and asked "Hey Gaara, you know where I am sleeping?" Gaara nodded and said "You are staying in Temari's room because she said she wanted to catch up with some things.
"Ok, might as well take her back too." said Naruto and he dragged Temari gently back to her room. He laid her in her futon and was about to sleep against the wall when Temari (in her sleep) grabbed on to Naruto and pulled him down next to her.
Naruto tried to pry Temari off him but failed. Sighing in defeat, he lay down next to her (not on the futon but next to It.) and closed his eyes. A few minutes later he thought he felt Temari get up but slept on, not knowing that Temari had snuggled up next to him and had her arm around him, pulling him closer to her, breathing in large amounts of the scent coming from Naruto.
Naruto slept peacefully but Kyuubi was sniggering behind the cage bars.
Inside Naruto's mind
"Looks like its working. A small boost makes five girls lose control and chase him here. Animal magnetism is a strong force indeed, this is going to be fun later on. I wonder if I should drop this big demon façade… scaring the shit out of him every time he pisses me off is getting boring now he is fifteen. Yeah…maybe when he next visits me I'll tell him I'm a she…"
Kyuubi closed her eyes for a moment and the image of a large red fox dissapeared. A naked girl with long red hair and nine tales coming out of her back lay in the cage instead.
"Maybe I'll tell him that I'm perverted as well…" the female/demon/whatever you want to call her created a bed with her thoughts and laid down in it, happy to be in someone's mind for once because you can get what ever you want just by imagining it.
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