Saving Grace

A/N: We getting near the end…well, the end of this part of the journey. Calleigh and Horatio still have a long way to go.

The first step in a person's salvation is knowledge of their sin.- Seneca

Twenty years ago, Laura Reid graduated from Florida State University with a PhD in criminal psychology and a new last name. Ten years later, she left her successful practice in South Beach to focus on her three young children. Then, five years ago, she got into a car with her husband after an anniversary dinner and woke up a week later with her legs missing from the knee down. Suddenly, book club and PTO weren't so important anymore. So after a year and a half of physical pain and suffering, Laura started her practice back up with a new purpose; to help people like the woman sitting in a wheelchair before her.

"Now before we get started, Calleigh, I want you to know that whatever you say to me is confidential, alright? Whatever is said in this room stays between you and me." Calleigh nodded as Laura explained.

"Doctor/Patient confidentiality laws. They drive…drove me crazy on cases." She corrected. It still hadn't fully sunk in yet that she was no longer a member of the Miami-Dade Police Department. Laura didn't immediately reply. Everything was still an open, and in some cases, infected wound for Calleigh, and she needed time to work through all of the pain and confusion.

"Tell me about John." Laura gently requested. Calleigh took a deep breath.

"John Hagen was strong, smart and very loving man. He was a great detective too." She described with tears in her eyes.

"But?" Laura could sense from her tone that there was more. Her patient shook her head. "Calleigh, you don't have to tell me anything you don't want me to know, but the more that I do know, the better I can understand and help you. There's going to be difficult topics, but I promise that once you face your pain, it won't hurt so much, okay?" Calleigh nodded and took another deep breath.

"I loved John very much." She stated with a trembling voice. "But he was not the love of my life." Calleigh felt like her heart was about to explode. She didn't want to admit that fact to herself or anyone else but it was the truth; she did not love John Hagen with her whole heart.

Laura bit her lip uncomfortably. A bomb had been uncovered and if not handle correctly, it could blow up in her face.

"Calleigh, if you didn't love him-"

"I never said I didn't love him! I just, love someone else more." She corrected as the tears ran freely down her pale cheeks.

"Then why did you agree to marry John if there was someone else?" Laura asked gently.

"Because there wasn't anything else! At least not then." Calleigh declared.

"But there's someone now?" She nodded. "Who is it?"

"I can't." Calleigh said, trying to warn her off of the subject but Laura was relentless.

"Remember, I am not here to judge. Only to help." Calleigh looked at her hesistantly and then licked her lips and taking a shaky breath.

"Certain things have happened and they have changed everything."

"What happened, Calleigh?" Laura pushed while still trying to be patient.

She could see the storms raging in her soul. Waves of guilt and grief crashed in her eyes as her mind recalled the moment she threw her future away.

Horatio reached out and placed his hand on her cheek. She closed her eyes and leaned her head into his hand, where she placed the softest kisses on his palm. When she opened her eyes again, he leaned down and captured her lips in hungry, urgent kiss.

Calleigh squeezed her eyes shut and wiped away her tears.

"Calleigh-"

"I kissed him!" She sobbed as she admitted it aloud for the first time.

"Who? Who did you kiss?"

"Horatio. The night of the accident he came to visit my in my lab and I kissed him." Calleigh buried her face in her hands as the intensity of her tears increased. "I love him and it is because of that that John is dead. This chair is my punishment; it's a permanent sign of my weakness." Painful sobs racked her tiny, weak frame as she spoke.

"Have you ever talked to him about all of this?" Laura asked, a bit blown away by what had just unfolded.

"We've talked but he doesn't listen." Calleigh snapped, anger now beginning to replace the sorrow. "It wouldn't change things anyways. Horatio is hopelessly committed to his precious princess because 'he made a promise'." Laura didn't miss the bitterness that showed through clearly in her speech.

"You need to make him listen, Calleigh. For your sanity, you have to get him to listen to you." Laura stated strongly.

"How? I can bear to face him right now."

"Send him an email, write him a letter, leaving him a message on his phone, it doesn't matter what you do, as long as it works." Calleigh stared at her, doubt clearly written on her face, before finally giving in.

"Alright, I'll give it one more try."