Act thirteen
We cut to the tower room, where Raven is lying on the bed,
"I'm sorry we don't have enough time for romance, my dear. But consider this foreplay", Robin winces "…oh God, I feel so horrible and dirty".
"You're a villain, get used to it", snapped Draconus "this is the last act anyway."
Robin gives Raven an apologetic look before jumping onto the bed to straddle her.
"Apologies in advance", says Robin, ripping off the dress, finding the everlast "A chastity belt? Oohh, that's gonna chafe my willy".
"Tee hee", giggles dumasa44 "willy."
"This is what we get for letting a teenager direct this scene", mutters Robin, then looks at Raven "I'll be back".
As he runs off, we see Speedy and Mammoth standing outside, still by the gallows.
"I hope she's still wearing her iron underwear", says Speedy.
We hear the sound of drilling coming from the tower.
Inside the tower, Raven is shaking...shaking allot.
"No matter what you'll do I shall never submmmiiiiiiiiiiit", she says, her voice shaking from all the drilling.
We see that Robin had got a jackhammer and is trying to use it to open the lock. The door suddenly bursts open and Gar steps in, striking a hero pose.
"Ah hah", says Gar.
"Gaaaaaaaarrrrfiiiieeeeeld!" judders Raven.
Gar studiedly draws out his sword.
"Prepare for the fight scene", he says.
Robin watches for a second, before dropping the jackhammer.
"Forgive the interruption, my darling", says Robin "I will dispatch your love, then come back and finish the job".
He grabs his sword and runs towards Gar.
"En guarde".
"You are SO slaughtering the French language", says Draconus.
"Thanks for the warning," says Gar.
Both fight, exchanging puns of all kinds, neither of them actually HITTING each other. Robin backs into a fire, burning his backside. They back into a corridor, where you can only see their siloettes. They both make hand shadow puppet animals, which attack each other, Gar's bizarre looking cow...
"It's a dog", says Gar.
... Sorry. Gar's bizarre looking dog, losing. They keep fighting until Gar sticks his pointed sword out of a window, hooking one of dumass44's doughnuts.
"Hey", says dumass44.
"Oh...sorry", says Gar, handing it back to him.
Robin suddenly pulls out a dagger but misses, instead cutting the locket off Gar's neck. The locket flies into the air, bursting open on the ceiling, a small key falls out of it and lands neatly in the lock of Raven's chastity belt.
"Who saw that one coming...", says Raven, rolling her eyes.
"It is the key to the greatest treasure in all the land", grins Gar.
"Glad ya love me for my personality, Gar'", mutters Raven "Oh Garfield, this means you have always been my one true love because it's just the right size".
"It's not the size that counts, it's how you use it", snaps Robin.
" I see someone has issues", grins Gar.
Robin and Gar start fighting again. Gar punches Robin in the face, making him crash into the wall and fall slumped in a chair. Gar smiles and kisses his sword.
"Thank you, my friend",
Robin suddenly gets up and charges towards Gar with his dagger...and right into the pointed end of the sword as Gar puts it under his arm. Gar moves and we see the sword jutting out of Robin's chest.
"Owww...dying hurts", says Robin, then sighs "I mean, oh it's not...so bad".
He turns and sees the rest of the sword is sticking through his back.
"...I was wrong."
As Robin falls to the floor, Aqualad comes in, screaming and crying, he runs to Robin's side. Gar and Raven shrug and go over to watch...'cause they're morbid like that.
"Oh my dear beloved Sheriff of Fruitland", cries Aqualad "You've been run through! How do you feel".
Robin blinks at him for a few moments.
"I'm DYING you fool".
"You don't HAVE to die", grins Aqualad.
"I... don't?" asks Robin, suddenly unsure.
"No. I've got this magic pill that could save your life", says Aqualad, waving it in front of him.
"Don't trust magic pills, Robin", shouts Speedy "they make swirly patterns. SWIRLY PATTERNS!"
Aqualad blinks, before looking back at Robin.
"And I'll give it to you, if you promise to marry me, and be mine forever".
Robin gives a worried glance at Raven and Gar, who watch him with interest.
"Oh... alright", he sighs.
Aqualad shoves the pill in his mouth before yanking out the sword; Robin's mortal wound healing instantly.
"Oooooohhh swirly patterns...man, where did you get this pill", slurs Robin.
"I warned you, but did you listen to me? Oh, no, you knew, didn't you? Oh, it's just a harmless little bunny, isn't it?" rants Speedy.
Everyone looks at him. Draconus is seen pinching his nose and shaking his head.
"He means pill everyone, now get back to work and stop listening to him." Says dumass44.
"It's a secret", snaps Aqualad, then smiles sweetly "How do you feel now".
"Good, surprisingly good", says Robin, then blinks as Aqualad strokes his hair "...and yet... somehow... incredibly depressed".
Aqualad giggles and gives him an Eskimo kiss before dragging Robin away, feet first.
"I always wanted to marry a cop", he grins.
"WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!", screams Robin
Everyone paises and looks at him.
"Um I mean, Wait, wait, I've changed my miiiiiinnd" Robin screams as he is dragged away, never to be seen again.
"Well that was weird" says dumass44.
"Heh heh. Bye bye joy-boy!" snickers Draconus.
Sorry for the late update, college papers are a killer on a writers life. hope you enjoyed this one. next update should be soon. thanks again