Kicked in the Teeth

Paris Memorial Hospital-0600hrs

There was little that Sly could do. He didn't know where to find the bastards that took away his beloved Carmelita, and he didn't even know who it was. All he could do was wait; wait to be contacted, wait to be kidnapped-it didn't matter. He could barely feel anything with his left ring finger; it was nearly blown off by the explosion.

"Oh! Mister Cooper your up early," a nurse said as she entered his recovery room. "Somebody had left this for you."

She handed Sly a large envelope, the kind that had bubble wrap lining, and walked out, closing the door behind her. Sly looked at the front of the envelope- 'To Sly Cooper'

Opening up the envelope, he found a large printed letter:

Dear Cooper,

I believed it is thoughtful that we should tell you that we have your friends…and your girl. But don't worry! They're fine. For now. Now that one question has been answered, I shall answer the next and even more important question: Why am I doing this? Simple Cooper: power. Money brings power Sly, apparently a concept you were too noble to realize. As a birthright, you are unofficially the richest man in the world. You hold in your position untold riches of immeasurable wealth. I want those riches, and you are going to give it to me. I shall contact you at 10:00 PM your time, straight across from the main entrance of Centre Pompidou, center payphone next to the sculpture fountain. Do not contact anybody from your police detail; otherwise you will start receiving bits and pieces of your friends in the mail. Au Revoir Cooper.

-Condor

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Centre Pompidou, Paris, France-2200hrs

It hadn't been easy, but Sly had managed an escape from the hospital. Making despite having been through hell and a hand basket at the police station, his police uniform looked almost unflawed; a lie that was pulled off by the dim light from the streets. Nobody suspected anything wrong with him. By now, few people were even out on the streets, let alone hanging out at the payphones.

Sly checked his watch; 10:02 PM. They were late. And then as if on queue, the center payphone rang. The phone barely rang once as Sly hurriedly picked up the phone.

"Hello?" he asked.

"Ahhh, Cooper," a voice said over the line. "Its good to know that you've come alone. Even if you didn't come we'd probably still have caught you and beaten you senselessly. But then where's the fun in making you squirm at the idea of never seeing your friends ever again? And what about your renarde Fox? I'm sure you can't wait to be with her, even if the two of you are buried together in the same shallow grave. But that Winthorpe; such a weakling. You could probably shove a banana in his ass and he's scream as if you were disemboweling him with a rusty spoon."

"Get to the god damn point you batarde!" Sly venomously croaked.

"All in good time sailor mouth," the voice said.

"Where are you so I can tear out your spine?"

"Right next to you!"

Sly turned just in time to see a fist catch him in the face, sending him reeling into the payphone and knocking him out.

Emile hung up his cell phone with a smirk on his face and turned to his henchman. "Get him into the van."

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Location unknown-time unknown

"Quite, he's coming to. Sly? Do you hear me? Sly?"

Sly cautiously and painfully opened his eyes, much to his dismay. The bright lights from the ceiling hurt his eyes and made made his headache even worse. Everything was still a blur, but he could feel a very firm grip on him as he felt himself being propped up along a wall.

"Why do I feel like I've been kicked in the teeth?" Sly slipped out.

"Beats me but either way your stuck here with us," a sincere Latin voice said, cutting through the garbled talk of others.

Sly's eyes opened wide, trying hard not to wince at the pain of his headache being irritated by the light. He knew that voice, and he knew that grip. Two people he knew, and now he knew that the others were there too.

"Carmelita?" Sly asked, still trying to make out the blurs in his vision.

"I'm here Sly," Carmelita replied.

"As well as the rest of us," another nasally voice said.

With the help of his imagination, Sly was finally able to make out who was with him. With her hand on his shoulder and a 'Are you okay Baby?' look on her face was Carmelita. Winthorpe was standing by, looking nervous and uncomfortable being among wanted criminals, along with the look that he had been let down; it was no big secret he had major crush on Carmelita. Everyone else was gathered around him.

"Where am I?" Sly mumbled. His jaw hurt like hell.

"Dunno," Murray said. "But if 'The Murray' gets out of here anytime soon, people are gonna start wishing they had nevered screwed with the Cooper Gang."

"Jeez, not so loud Murray…" Sly started. But then he realized his mistake.

Carmelita and Winthorpe gaped in surprise and horror at him. But Sly knew that Winthorpe must be cheering on the inside that now Carmelita may be free.

"Oooh, racoonus doodus in macho macho prob!" Dimitri gawked.

"Oh SHUT THE HELL UP WITH YOUR SHITTY RAPPER JIVE TALK!" Bentley yelled, throwing his hands in the air. "Nobody can understand you half the time, AND I'M ABOUT READY TO STICK ONE OF MY EXPLOSIVES IN YOUR ASS IF YOU DON'T STOP HITTING ON PENELOPE!"

Sly managed to turn his attention away from the two arguing reptilians to meet Carmelita's gaze. It was clear that she was not pleased.

"You lied to me," she muttered venomously.

"I'm sorry…" Sly tried to speak, but it didn't leave his throat.

Carmelita quickly took her hand away from his shoulder and skulked to a corner. Sly was now clear of any attention, all of it on Bentley and Dimitri's argument. It was clear that being trapped in hell for a week frayed their nerves.

There was a gunshot and several guards entered the room, their guns pointed at the group. They parted and a condor entered.

"Take the raccoon," the condor said.

He backed off and watched as the guards rushed the group, tackling them down and pointing their guns to their heads as two of them snatched Sly off the ground. He put up little fight, not because he wanted to, but because he was now drained of any morale, knowing that the woman he loved at unofficially dumped him.

"So this is the great Sly Cooper?" Emile said. "I think Miss Fox gave a tougher struggle than you."

Sly reared his head spat in the condor's face. Emile backhanded the thief across the face, the jeweled ring cutting a gash on his face. But that didn't stop Sly.

"You can't keep me locked up," he grunted. "I'll be outta here tonight and come back tomorrow to bang your mom…"

This time, Emile swung around, delivering a roundhouse kicked to Sly's face. He was struck with so much force that he broke free of his holders and sprawled out on the ground.

"Take him to the interrogation room," Emile said. "I'm not done with him yet."

The guards pulled out of the room, dragging Sly along with him. His friends staring on in awe and pain.

"He is a goner," Panda King quietly said.

Maybe he was right.

Does anyone know what rock band did the song 'Kicked in the Teeth'? and if so what was the album?

Sorry about this long ass update-combonation of school and working on Leviathan have been keeping me busy.

Till bext time! NS