Day 3

Going out

Bowser yawned. He'd had a good night's sleep, although something was missing. He saw Peach was asleep. He grinned.

Bowser: MWA HAA HA HA, WAAAAAAR HAR HAR-DIE HAR, HE HAW HE HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE, HA HO HO, he he…. ha.

But then his loud evil laughing woke Peach up.

Bowser: Crap.

But luckily for him Peach was to thick to realise why Bowser was laughing in an evil sort of way.

Then Ben walked in, looking kind of dizzy. He straight away walked into the bedpost, and then continued to do so.

Ben: Eh, Bowsa! Stop lol 'cause you wanna get Peach in her sleep in, yer naw, a vibration sorta' way! You're gonna get PWN3D!

Peach slapped Bowser.

Peach: Pervert! Anyway, what hit you Ben?

Ben: Eh, I think someone put alcohol in me 'nanas!

Bowser: Oh don't worry, it will run off in about an hou- shit.

Ben hit Bowser.

Ben: Bastard!

Then Jr. walked in with a really big lolly.

Bowser: Hey Jr! How did you buy that?

Jr: With stolen money.

Bowser: Well done son!

Jr: I stole it from you.

Bowser: Why you little son of a gay man!

Jr: You're my dad.

Bowser: SHIT!!!

Ben: Soz, bat I g2g.

Bowser: Err, why are you speaking using internet slang?

Ben: 'Cause I'm drunc! I dunnie lake tit eitha!

Bowser: You don't use internet slang when you're drunk.

Octorok: Shit! Now you have given away that I'm not very good at making people appear drunk! Oh, and chedda cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeese!!!

Ben: You mean I only appear to be drunk? I'm not actually drunk! Yaaaaaay!

Octorok: No, you are really drunk.

Ben: Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! Dow I dust peak willy again!

Jr: That sounds disturbing.

Later, at breakfast, Bowser had an announcement to make.

Bowser: Ok everybody, please shut up now!

Everybody stopped talking except Dougal, who continued his conversation unaware.

Dougal: And then, see, Hurricane Katrina hit and the sexy lady's clothes were blown off and she was like, only in a bikini! And I got it on film! Wait, why has everyone gone quiet- oh, right (looks embarrassed).

Bowser: Anyway, as I was trying to say, you're all going to go out to a restaurant!

Jr: Are you coming Papa?

Bowser: HELL NO!!! I'm gonna check out the hotel casino and bar!

Peach: Humph!

Bowser: No- I mean… but- c'mon Peach and- well I'll cha …… crap.

Petey: Well if there's a casino I'm staying! Actually I'm only interested in getting drunk at the bar, but….

King Boo: I'm staying for, (looks quickly left and right suspiciously) reasons….

Mr.Doolally: I need to make some money, and, err, other things.

Mr.Doolally pulled Henry away screaming.

Henry: Oh God save me! Help me, anybody! I don't want to be gay! Save my guns too! Oh, and Peach, Bowser thinks you've got a nice pair of bazookas.

Bowser: Henry, you be my right-hand man and keep these people under control. And put him down Mr.Doolally.

Henry: Phew!

And so they all walked off to Delfino Plaza. Bowser was watching Peach go.

Bowser: Petey, I think I'm in love.

Petey: Or you just want to…

Bowser: That too.

In Delfino Plaza there were several restaurants. Frank and Dougal wanted to go to a pub called "Ye Old AK-47," Jr. wanted the one were you can watch the Teletubbies while you eat, Kamek wanted the "Kill Yoshi" fun house and Ben wanted a banana tree. But Peach (being spoilt) got her own way and they went to the Bob'omb restaurant (God knows why she wanted that one. Actually he doesn't).

Inside the restaurant they went to the owner, who was the Big Bob'omb.

Henry: I'd like a menu, please.

Owner (in Pakistani accent): Ok, here you go.

Henry: Ok, I'd like the seafood pasta, please.

Owner: Sorry, we're out of that.

Henry: Ok, the pizza then.

Owner: Sorry, none of that.

Henry: How about the sushi?

Owner: None.

Henry: Lasagne?!?

Owner: None.

Henry: Fruit selection?!?

Owner: None.

Henry: Grapefruit?!?

Owner: None.

Several hours later…

Henry: CRAPPY TESCO POTATOES?!?

Owner: None.

Henry: TINNED BEANS?!?

Owner: None.

Henry: SHIT?!?

Owner: None?

Ben: Why the question mark?

Owner: Oh, because I think I feel a shit coming on.

Henry: IS THIS EVEN A RESTAURANT?!?

Owner: No, the restaurant's next door.

Henry just stared. He did this for several years, then got in a time machine and went back. He then burned the owner with a flamethrower.

Jr: Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooetc.

Henry: Why?

Jr: Because he's a bomb you dick!

Henry: Oh shit….

BOOM BANG BANG-A BOOM BOOM BOOOOOOOOOOOOM KAPOW WHIZZ CRACKLE BOOM BANG.

Basil Brush: Boom boom!!!

Henry's gun shooting Basil's head off: Boom boom!!!

BOOM BANG EXPLOSION SOUNDS BOOM etc again.

And many hours later they headed home, taking turns to kick Henry in the cock.

When they got back they had to lock Bowser and Petey in a padded room so they didn't hurt themselves. Guess what; they were drunk.

Thanks to prince bowser6 for the review!