7 – Are you trying to get us killed?"
"Hey, Sook, I'm going to go get lunch!" Lorelai called in the direction of the Inn's kitchen.
"You want me to go with you?" Sookie asked, coming into the foyer.
"I thought you were having lunch with Jackson?" Lorelai frowned. Sookie had been very overprotective over the past couple of months.
"I don't have to. In fact, I'm in the mood for a burger." Sookie insisted.
"Sookie, I don't need you to go with me everywhere." Lorelai replied.
"I'm not, I really wanna have lunch with you." Sookie tried, but Lorelai could tell she was lying.
"No, you really wanna keep an eye on me." Lorelai corrected.
"Fine, maybe I do." Sookie admitted. "But what if something happens?"
"I'll be at the diner, odds are someone could help me." Lorelai reasoned.
"But what if something happens on your way to the diner?"
"It takes five minutes to walk there and I have my cell phone." Lorelai concluded. "Besides, nothing's gonna happen for at least another month, probably longer."
"You don't know that, baby's come early all the time." Lorelai knew Sookie was just concerned, but her constant supervision was really getting to her.
"They also come late all the time." She now countered. "Remember Davey?"
"Fine." Sookie caved. "But you have me on speed dial, right? And Rory, and your parents?"
"You know I do." Lorelai assured her, turning to leave. "You go have a nice lunch with your husband."
Lorelai left the inn and wrapped her coat tightly around herself. She had bought a new winter coat a few weeks earlier, so she would be able to button it around her stomach.
Letting her mind wander, she walked towards the center of town. It was nine days before Christmas, and Rory would be home soon. With Logan, of course. Lorelai wasn't sure how she felt about that, but she had decided to at least try to make him feel welcome. He was obviously crazy about her daughter.
Christmas was going to be very different this year. Her parents had decided to have a small party, just for the family, on Christmas Eve, and Lorelai was hosting a big party at her house on Christmas Day. All of their friends and family were coming, her parents, Sookie and her family, April and Anna, Lane and Zach, Liz and T.J. and their daughter, Amanda, who had been born the previous week.
Thinking she had to get Sookie to go shopping with her that weekend, Lorelai passed Weston's. She still had almost half of her presents to get, and she wanted to get it over with before the last minute shoppers invaded the stores.
As she crossed the town square, Lorelai started thinking about what to order for lunch. She and Lane had started a game where she would order something completely hideous and Lane would complain the entire time she ate because it looked so disgusting.
An omelette with jelly beans and hot chili sauce, she decided on and stepped off the sidewalk, looking up to make sure no cars were in the street. And she froze, her hand coming up to cover her mouth as she saw who was standing in front of the diner.
xxxxx
Luke sighed as he drove into Stars Hollow. It had been more than five months since he left, not sure if he would ever come back. And here he was.
As he passed the familiar buildings, he noticed that nothing had changed. Not that he had really expected it to, this was Stars Hollow after all. Nothing ever changed here.
Stopping in front of the diner, he turned the truck off, but didn't get out of the car. He wasn't sure what he was going to do. He should probably go into the diner, make sure it was still standing after five months, but somehow the thought of working just didn't feel right.
April. He should go and see April. Deep down he had known that taking off a few months into his relationship with his newly discovered daughter had been a really bad idea, but at the time that relationship had just been forced to take the backseat to his relationship with Lorelai. Or, more accurately, his no longer existing relationship with Lorelai.
He had realized the second that those words left her mouth that he would have to leave.
I spent the night with Cristopher.
The words still haunted his dreams, every night. He hadn't been able to stay in Stars Hollow, to watch her and Chris make the life that he and Lorelai should have had.
And he knew that he wouldn't have been able to take it if she had gone to Boston to live there instead, since he wouldn't be able to see her.
So he had left. He still hadn't seen her, but it had been on his terms. Somehow that made it a little better. Not a lot, but a little. He had made the choice to leave before she could take off, leaving him to wonder.
But now, here he was. Back where he started. He didn't know if he was staying or not. All he knew was that he had felt that he needed to spend Christmas with April, so he had come back. Originally, he had planned on living in the apartment, maybe work a little in the diner. But now he wondered if it was better if he stayed in Woodbridge, at a motel or something, so he wouldn't risk running into Lorelai and Chris. Or the concerned towns people.
Deciding to go to Woodbridge, tosee April and then figure out what he was going to do, he started the truck again. Only to turn it of a few seconds later. It was the middle of the day, April was at school. Her break didn't start for another couple of days, he knew that. He would just have to keep himself busy until three, and then he could go see her.
He could go see Liz. He hadn't seen the new baby yet, and he knew Liz would be happy to see him. He would do that.
He opened the car door and jumped into the street, closing the door. As he was about to walk across the sidewalk to the diner, he looked up and froze. It couldn't be her.
She spotted him as well, and stopped dead in her tracks, her hand covering her mouth. And it was her. Lorelai. His Lorelai. Though not anymore. He let his eyes wander over her and managed to hold back a gasp of surprise. A very pregnant Lorelai.
She took a step towards him, her eyes wide with... what, surprise? Shock? He leaned back against the truck, not sure his legs would support him if he tried to walk. Why hadn't she told him? Or was it...?
"Luke?" She said, her voice barely more than a whisper.
"Lorelai." He replied, surprised that his voice didn't break.
"It's really you?" She asked, and he nodded. "You're back?"
"I'm back." He confirmed, and it seemed to finally sink in.
"Oh my God." She said, tears forming in her eyes. He resisted the urge to reach out and pull her into his arms, comforting her and assuring her that everything would be OK. "Where were you?"
"Around." He replied, not wanting to discuss it. "Were you even going to tell me?" His voice was accusing.
"What?" She wondered, sounding confused.
"About this!" He gestured at her stomach, and she looked down as if only noticing it just then.
"I didn't..."
"You didn't want me to know, is that it?" He cut her off, raising his voice. She just looked at him, confusion visible in her eyes.
"No, I..."
"I mean, why not? Anna did it, why not you too?" He yelled, and she flinched as if he had hit her. "Sure, let's not tell Luke, he doesn't deserve to know anyway!"
"I didn't know where you were!" Lorelai yelled back, finding her voice again.
"Yeah right." He scoffed, knowing that she was right. But he needed to blame this on her. The guilt was more than he could handle at the moment.
"You refused to call me, and no one knew where you were, and your cell phone was off." Lorelai rambled. "I called every day, five, ten times a day, and then the little voice stopped saying 'the number you have dialled can not be reached' and started saying 'the number you have dialled is not being used' and still I kept trying for weeks, so don't come here and say that I didn't try to tell you!"
"How am I even supposed to know that it's mine, huh?" Luke retorted. "I mean, for all I know you had been sleeping with Chris for weeks before you told me."
She just looked at him, pain evident in her eyes.
"I don't have to do this." She said, turning around and starting to walk away from him.
"Lorelai!" He called after her, but she didn't stop. "Lorelai!" He started to walk after her across the square. "Damn it, I'm talking to you!"
Suddenly she stopped, and he caught up with her.
"Finally, will you just listen to me?" He walked around her so he could face her. He frowned when he noticed that her eyes were closed and she was clenching her hands as if she was in pain. "What's wrong?" He asked, suddenly not caring about the argument anymore.
"Nothing." She said, not looking up at him before she started walking again, heading in the direction of the inn. After a few feet she stopped again, doubling over slightly and clutching her stomach.
"Something is obviously wrong, let me help you." Luke tried to put his arm around her waist, but she shrugged him off and continued walking, not getting far before she had to hold onto one of the benches for support because of the pain. "I'm taking you to the hospital." Luke announced, grabbing Lorelai by the arm and leading her towards his truck.
"I'm fine!" She pulled free, but he only caught her again.
"You are not fine, and you are going to the hospital!" Luke insisted, pulling her along with him.
"No, I'm not, let me go!" Lorelai pulled free again, only to grab onto Luke's arm in pain a moment later. He took the opportunity and lifted her up, carrying her to the truck. "Put me down!" She yelled, kicking against him.
"Do you want me to drop you?" Luke asked, and she stopped wriggling. When he got to the passenger side of the truck, he paused. "Are you going to get in the car?" He asked, and she grudgingly nodded, so he put her down and opened the car door for her. She got in after a little help from him, and he walked around the car to the drivers side.
He started the car and headed for the highway. As they passed the 'Welcome to Stars Hollow' sign, Lorelai pulled out her cell phone.
"You're not calling the police, are you? Cause I doubt they'll believe I kidnapped you." Luke half joked. Lorelai rolled her eyes at him.
"I'm calling Rory." She said, putting the phone to her ear.
"Hello?" Rory's voice came over the line.
"Hey, hon." Lorelai said, grabbing onto the strap above the window as Luke accelerated to well above the speed limit.
"Hey, mom, what's up?"
"Now, don't panic, but I need you to meet us at the hospital." Lorelai said, waiting for the hysteric attack she knew Rory would get.
"The hospital? What happened? Are you in labor? But it's way too early..."
"Breathe, hon, breathe." Lorelai cut her off, and she heard Rory take a couple of deep breaths into the phone. "Now, I don't think it's the real thing, but someone..." She glared at Luke. "...insisted. But you should probably get there anyway, just in case. Unless you have an important class?"
"No, I've got the afternoon off." Rory said, having calmed down a little. At that moment, Luke hit a large bump in the road and Lorelai whined.
"Are you trying to get us killed?" She complained.
"I'm just trying to get there as soon as possible!" Luke retorted.
"Who was that?" Rory asked, hearing Luke's voice over the line.
"Oh, that." Lorelai said, not sure how to explain the situation to Rory. "That's just... Luke."
"Luke?" Rory screeched. "What's he doing there? When did he come back? Why didn't you tell me?"
"Whoa whoa, slow down, kid." Lorelai cut her daughter off, whincing with another pain. "Listen, mommy's in a lot of pain here, so I can't explain everything right now. Just meet us at the hospital in Hartfort, OK?"
"I'm already out the door." Rory replied, hanging up.
Lorelai glared at Luke as he hit another bump in the road. He shot her an apologetic look.
"Sorry." He mumbled.
xxxxx
"We need a doctor!" Luke almost yelled as they entered Hartford Memorial. The nurse behind the desk just raised an eyebrow at him.
"You'll have to wait your turn." She said, not even looking at Lorelai. Luke was about to counter when Lorelai shook her head at him.
"I'll handle this." She said, walking up to the desk, her stomach clearly visible to the woman behind it. "Hi, my name is Lorelai Gilmore. Listen. There's a kid in here that might very well be on its way to making its entrance in this world, so unless you want that to happen right here, I suggest you get a doctor."
The nurse looked like she would most of all like to run away from there, but picked up a phone and dialled a number.
"I have a woman in labor at the reception, Lorelai Gilmore." She said into the phone, then waited for a moment before hanging up. "A nurse will be here in a moment."
"Thank you." Lorelai said sweetly, smiling at the woman before walking over to the plastic chairs against the wall and sitting down.
"How did you do that?" Luke asked, amazed.
"Years of practice." Lorelai shrugged, not looking at him.
"Look, Lorelai, I'm sorry about what I said, I didn't..."
"Miss Gilmore?" A male nurse interrupted him.
"That would be me." Lorelai said, heaving herself up from the chair.
"If you would take a seat please." The nurse said, indicating the wheelchair he was pushing in front of him. Lorelai sat down. The nurse looked at Luke. "Is this..."
"He just gave me a ride." Lorelai cut him off, not meeting Luke's eyes.
"Alright then." The nurse said, looking slightly confused. He started rolling Lorelai towards an elevator, Luke just looking after them.
xxxxx
"Where's my mom?" Rory asked the minute she spotted Luke in the waiting room. A kind nurse had told him to go to the fifth floor, where Lorelai had been taken, so instead of waiting in the lobby of the hospital, he had spent the past twenty minutes in a room full of expecting fathers and other family members. He wasn't sure what he preferred.
"I don't know, they won't tell me anything, since I'm not family." He said sarcastically and Rory frowned.
"But you are!" She exclaimed. "I mean, not my family, but you're the baby's dad, shouldn't that count?"
"Am I? You're sure about that?" Luke asked.
"What? Of course I am." Rory looked at him confused. "Why would you think that?"
"I don't know, just surprised I guess." Luke said. Apparently, Lorelai hadn't told Rory about her night with Christopher. That was a good sign, at least they weren't together.
"I'm gonna go call my grandparents." Rory said, but before she could leave the nurse that had gotten Lorelai from the lobby appeared.
"You brought Miss Gilmore in, right?" He said to Luke, who nodded. "Well, she's doing fine, it was just Braxton-Hicks contractions."
"Braxton-what?" Rory asked. The nurse frowned at her.
"This is Lorelai's daughter." Luke told him, and the nurse nodded.
"Well, Braxton-Hicks is really just another name for false labor. It's very common at this stage of the pregnancy." He explained. "Your mother hasn't had them before?"
"No, she hasn't mentioned anything." Rory replied. "Why did it happen?"
"There may not be a particular reason, most women experience these pains during the third trimester. It helps get the body ready for the actual labor. Sometimes, stress or physical exhaustion can cause it, but mostly it just happens."
"Can we take her home?" Rory asked, but the nurse shook his head.
"I'm afraid the doctor discovered some irregularities in the baby's heartbeats, so he wants to keep your mother over night, just to monitor the baby. It's probably nothing, but just in case." He said.
"Can I see her?" Rory asked, and the nurse nodded.
"Right this way." He lead her down a hallway, neither of them giving Luke a second glance. He sat down on one of the plastic chairs, burying his head in his hands.
This was his fault. The nurse had said that stress could cause it, and what had he done? He had started accusing her, yelling at her. He should have just let her talk, explain, but no, he had to go off and picture the worst case scenario. And now she was in the hospital because of him. There might be something wrong with the baby, and that was his fault too. He shut out the rational voice in his head saying it would have happened anyway and gave in to the guilt.
He had accused her of not wanting him to know. But had he given her a choice? No. He had taken off, not told anyone where he was. He had deliberately left his cell phone in the apartment, so he wouldn't be tempted to answer it when she called, if she called. Now he understood what Liz had meant when she had told him he would regret not calling Lorelai all those months ago. She had known.
Why had he been so stubborn? Why hadn't he just called her? He'd sure as hell wanted to. But his stupid pride had gotten in the way, and now it may be too late. The way she had looked at him when he had questioned her... there had been so much pain in her eyes.
Sighing, he leaned back in the chair. Rory would probably be a while, and he wasn't going anywhere until he knew that Lorelai and the baby were fine.
xxxxx
"Mom?" Rory carefully peeked into the room the nurse had brought her to.
"Hey kid, come on in." Lorelai said, and Rory entered the room, closing the door behind her.
"How're you feeling?" She asked, sitting down next to her mother's bed.
"I'm fine, just uncomfortable." Lorelai said, looking at the elastic band that the doctor had put around her stomach with a thing that monitored the baby's heartbeats.
"It's just to make sure the baby's doing OK." Rory reasoned, and Lorelai nodded.
"I know, I know." She said. "But I still won't be able to sleep like this."
"I'm sure it won't be a problem." Rory replied, giving her mother a questioning look. "So..."
"So... what?" Lorelai put on an innocent look.
"Don't 'so what' me, missy, you know exactly what I'm talking about!"
"Boy, you just jump right in, don't you?" Lorelai sighed.
"What's he doing here? Is he back, or what?" Rory asked, voicing some of the questions Lorelai had been asking herself over the past hour.
"I honestly don't know, kid." She now admitted. "I was going to the diner for lunch, like every day, and suddenly, there he was."
"Just like that, huh?" Rory said and Lorelai nodded.
"And he noticed, of course, and started asking if I had planned on telling him at all." Lorelai continued.
"What? It was his own fault, taking off like that!" Rory exclaimed.
"I know, that's what I told him too." Lorelai nodded. "And then he said..." She didn't finish the sentence, holding back a sob.
"He said what, mom?" Rory enquired, a concerned look on her face.
"He asked how he was supposed to know that it was his." A few tears streamed down Lorelai's face as she said this.
"Oh, mom." Rory pulled her mother into a hug.
"I know he has the right to wonder, I mean I practically told him... but it still hurt, you know?" Lorelai mumbled into Rory's shoulder.
"I know." Rory said, rubbing her mother's back. "Do you want me to talk to him? Explain?"
"No, I should do it." Lorelai said, pulling back. "If he'll ever talk to me again."
"I don't think you have to worry about that." Rory said. "He looked really concerned when the nurse told us what was going on."
"He's still here?" Lorelai asked, a small light appearing in her eyes.
"Sure he is, and he didn't look like he was going anywhere." Rory revealed. "He still cares about you."
"I wouldn't be too sure about that." Lorelai said. "I was pretty mean to him when we got here."
"What did you do?" Rory asked in a stern voice.
"I just... the nurse that took me up here, he was about to ask if he was the dad, and I sort of cut him off, saying Luke had only given me a ride to the hospital." Lorelai said, looking a little embarrassed.
"Mom!"
"I know, I was just really angry with him." Lorelai explained and Rory sighed.
"Well, if there's no baby arriving today, I should really get back to school." She said, standing up. "I still have a couple of finals left, gotta study."
"You do that." Lorelai agreed, returning the kiss Rory gave her. "Good luck."
"Do you want me to call Grandma?" Rory asked, putting her coat on.
"No, there's no need to worry them." Lorelai shook her head.
"Yeah, you're right, they'd just panic." Rory nodded.
"Kind of like you?" Lorelai teased.
"Give me a break, I thought you were having the baby."
"I know, I'm just teasing a little." Lorelai replied. Rory paused before opening the door. "Could you call Sookie, though? Looks like I won't be going back to work today."
"Sure." Rory agreed, hesitating for a moment. "Do you want me to send him in?"
"If he's still here, sure." Lorelai said, hoping that he would be.
"He's still here." Rory said, leaving the room.
xxxxx
"Hey, you still in there?" Rory waved her hand in front of Luke's face. He was staring into space and hadn't heard her when she called him. Now he snapped out of the daze and looked up at Rory.
"How is she? Is she OK? Is everything OK?" He asked, standing up. Rory held up a hand to stop him.
"She's fine, just complaining as usual." She assured him, and he let out a breath.
"You're leaving?" He asked, and Rory nodded.
"Gotta get back to school, finals" She explained.
"Oh, sure, I should have realized that." He said, sitting back down in the chair.
"You gonna stay there all night?" Rory asked, raising an eyebrow.
"I have to know they're OK." Luke replied, looking at his feet.
Rory smiled to herself. Oh yeah, Luke still had a major thing for her mother. Now if she could only get the two of them to realize they were perfect together.
"You can go see her, if you want to." She said, and he looked up.
"You sure? She didn't seem to happy to have me here earlier." He replied.
"I'm sure. She actually asked me to tell you to go in." Rory lied a little. "She was just upset earlier."
"Are you sure it's OK?" Luke stood up hesitantly.
"I'm positive." Rory insisted. "She's in room twelve, just down the hallway."
"Thanks." He offered her a small smile before walking down the hallway.
"And Luke?" Rory called after him, and he turned around. "I'm glad you're back."
"Glad to be back."
xxxxx
Lorelai nervously twisted the sheet in her hands as she waited. Maybe he had left. It had been a couple of minutes since Rory left, it wouldn't take him that long to get there. And why would he stay? She had practically told him to leave.
"Hey." She heard from the door and looked up to find Luke standing awkwardly in the doorway.
"Hey, come on in." She replied, and he seemed to relax at her words. He closed the door behind him and walked over to her bed.
"You feeling better?" He asked, and she nodded.
"Much better, thank you." She said, indicating the chair next to the bed, and he sat down.
"And everything's OK with the...?" He gestured to her stomach.
"Everything seems fine." Lorelai said, glancing at the monitor next to the bed that kept track of the baby's heart beat. "The doctor said it was just a safety precaution to keep me overnight."
"That's good." Luke nodded. The silence between them was thick, and Lorelai decided to break it.
"So, when did you get back?" She asked.
"About a minute before you saw me." Luke said. "You didn't think I had managed to keep my return a secret in Stars Hollow, did you?"
"I guess not." Lorelai smiled a little. "So, why now?"
"Christmas is coming up, I wanted to spend the holidays with April." Luke explained.
"That's nice." Lorelai nodded. "So is this temporary?" She didn't look at him, knowing he would see the uncertainty in her eyes if she did.
"No, I'm staying." He replied, surprising himself since he hadn't decided if he was leaving after the holidays or not.
"Really?" She asked, looking up at him with a hint of hope in her eyes.
"I wasn't sure before, but I can't leave. Not now." He said, looking at her intently.
"You don't have to stay because of this, not if you really don't want to." Lorelai told him.
"I want to." He assured her. "Unless you don't want me around."
"No, I do, I really do." She hurriedly said.
"Good."
"Good."
They were quiet for a moment, but it was more comfortable this time around. After a few minutes, Luke broke the silence.
"I'm sorry." He blurted out. "I'm sorry about everything that happened before I left, and I'm sorry for leaving and for the way I talked to you earlier. I had no right to question you like that, to yell at you. This is all my fault."
"What's all your fault?" Lorelai asked, frowning.
"You being in here, and the... the baby, something's wrong and it's my fault because I yelled at you and I..."
"It's not your fault!" Lorelai cut him off. "Don't think that. This would have happened anyway, the doctor said that it's perfectly normal. I just overreacted."
"I'm so sorry." Luke repeated, meeting Lorelai's eyes, and she could see tears forming in his. "I am so sorry. For everything."
"So am I." She replied. "For saying what I said before, and for everything back then too. I should have told you how I was feeling, we should have been able to talk about it."
"It wasn't your fault. I should have noticed you weren't happy." Luke said. "I should have told Anna that she had nothing to do with you seeing April or not, I should have made sure that you were both included in my life. And I shouldn't have postponed the wedding."
"Can we just settle on both of us being sorry and maybe start over?" Lorelai suggested. "I mean, there is a kid involved, after all. Or will be." She desperately needed him to be a part of her life, even if it was only as the father of her child and, someday hopefully, her friend again.
"I'd like that." Luke said, wondering what she meant. Did she want to get back together?
"So, friends?" She said, holding out her hand to him, hoping he would say something, anything, to give her the slightest hint that he wanted more.
Luke felt his heart drop to his knees, but didn't let it show. She wanted to be friends? Well, if it was the only way he would be able to be involved in her and the baby's life, he would take it.
"Friends." He agreed, taking her hand in his.
Lorelai felt tears starting to rise in her eyes, and willed them away. If he only wanted to be friends, then they would be friends. As long as she got to see him.
"There's just one thing..." Luke started, looking at her cautiously. "...and I don't mean it in an accusing way or anything, I just need to know."
"I am sure." She said, emphasizing every word.
"But can you really be a hundred percent positive? Isn't there always a chance?" Luke insisted. It wasn't that he didn't want the baby to be his, it was that he really, really did.
"I'm sure, because nothing happened that night with Chris." Lorelai said, holding her breath waiting for his reaction.
"Nothing happened? But you said..."
"I said we spent the night together." She cut him off. "And I said that because I wanted you to think that something happened, because I was angry, and hurt, and probably a million other things at the same time, and I said what I knew would make you leave. I just didn't know you'd leave that much." She finished with a joke.
Luke only looked at her for a moment. She hadn't slept with Christopher, nothing had happened. This baby inside her was his. His and Lorelai's. Their child.
"Now, I get that you're mad, and maybe you don't believe me, and that's fine." Lorelai started to ramble. "We can do a DNA test, cause I don't want you to have any doubt, OK?" She looked at him, not sure what he was going to say. Was he angry?
"We don't have to do that, I believe you." He said, and Lorelai sighed in relief.
"Really? Cause we can..."
"I believe you." He cut her off, more forcefully. "I really knew right away, I was just... scared that I would get my mind set on this and then have it ripped away."
"You won't, I promise." Lorelai shook her head. "So you're happy about this?"
"Happy? I know that I've missed a lot, but I get to be here for everything from now on, I get to see our child grow up... I don't think happy begins to cover it." He said, and Lorelai smiled at him.
"Good." She replied, moving a little in the bed to get more comfortable. All of a sudden, she gasped a little.
"What is it, what's wrong?" Luke instantly wondered, but Lorelai only smiled.
"Give me your hand." She said, reaching for it.
"What? Why?" He wondered, but she only grabbed his hand and placed it on her stomach.
"Do you feel that?" She asked.
"No, what am I supposed to..." He started, but then he felt a flutter against the palm of his hand. "Is that...?"
"He's kicking." Lorelai smiled. "I guess he know's his daddy."
"He? Is it a boy?" Luke asked, feeling excitement rising. A son.
"Oh, no, I'm sorry." Lorelai gave him an apologetic look. "I don't know that for sure, I want it to be a surprise, but I really think it's a boy, so I've just gotten used to saying 'him' instead of 'it'. sorry."
"Don't be." Luke reassured her. "It doesn't matter, boy or girl."
"Really?"
"Really."