Title: Don't forget me, beloved.

Chapter 3: Living death and dying life.

Note: Uh, since I so totally can't remember what made my dates for our puzzleshipping pair sappy…or even important, I'll just speed things along.
In other words, I'm sorry, but due to my screwed up memory, I limited their -written- time. You'll just have to use your imagination.

THERE WILL BE AN EPILOGUE! YOU MUST READ IT!

...don't hurt me, please.

Thanks to: Valine, Spicey Babe, Darkgold, Yami-hikari lover13,Masami Mistress Of Fire, and dragonlady222...

YOU GUYS ROCK!

(dragonlady222 reply: Eh. I don't like to be obvious, but Yugi wasn't an option.)

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It's amazing how much time two weeks really isn't. After all, most people simply can't wait for the week to end or the time to pass and yet, if it's the last two weeks you'll ever know…they can't ever go slow enough.

Yugi and Atemu had spent every moment together that they could possibly have, creating their last moments and reliving the old ones—anything, from their first meeting, to their first kiss…

Nearly both weeks had come and gone, flown like the light of hope against the looming shadow of cruel reality.

They had about three days left now and Atemu had felt the intense burden crash down on him. His mind, body and soul were all weary to the breaking point and he knew that the ritual would not be a moment too soon, however ever dreaded the day was.

Yugi woke up early that morning then got up and out of bed before Atemu. His lover, however, refused to be awakened, so Yugi gave him a kiss and let him sleep.

After a very decent amount of time had passed, Yugi entered Atemu's bedchambers and promptly frowned. Atemu was still in bed? The pharaoh never slept this late. True, they loved to curl up under the warm sheets together and neither was particularly a morning person, but…it was awfully late to still be sleeping.

Trotting over to Atemu's side of the bed, he leaned over and gently shook Atemu's arm, trying to ease him out of a deep slumber. The fact that he didn't response concerned Yugi, but thankfully, he was breathing. Yugi tried again. And again.

Finally Atemu opened an eye of smoldering embers to gaze up at his lover. "Hrm? Yu…gi…?" He muttered inquisitively, a small smile on his face. "What're you doin'…up so early?" Atemu yawned and stirred just a bit.

'Early? He thinks it's still early?' Yugi thought, amazed as he observed Atemu with an almost fearful concern. "But, love…it's very late."

Atemu opened the other eye lazily and raised an eyebrow; eyes still glazed with the intoxication of sleep. "It…is?" He yawned again, and though he was trying to wake up, Yugi could tell that the only thing the pharaoh really wanted to do right now was bury himself within his bed.

Honestly, Atemu looked exhausted…very horribly exhausted.

Sadly, Yugi understood. Atemu wasn't tired because of yesterday or their previous evening together…he was tired because of the heavy burden he carried. One that constantly grew as his strength shrank. Yugi smiled gently and pityingly at his beloved.

There was really only one thing to do.

Yugi crawled up on the bed and slipped beneath the warm, silky covers that still radiated body-heat. "Actually, maybe we should just rest today, Atemu. Go back to sleep." He murmured, cuddling up to his pharaoh.

Yugi had wanted them both to be awake and to spend time together, after all, their time was growing shorter by the minute. But his lover needed rest badly and all he could do was try to allow Atemu peace. It was all he had to offer the weary ruler.

Atemu knew of Yugi's thoughts almost as if he'd heard them. He didn't want to sleep either, but the soothing darkness called to him. 'I'm sorry, Yugi.' He thought sadly, drifting off into the world of dreams.

----

The second to last day had finally come and it began oh-so slowly, only couple of kisses from both males and bittersweet words spoken. They were both painfully aware that tomorrow evening, Atemu would have to complete the ritual of sealing. He got out of bed a little easier then before, but it didn't stop Yugi from worrying. All the same, time went on and they spent some of it enjoying the courtyard. Atemu sat near the flowers that his mother had planted so long ago, only a year before her untimely death…Yugi quietly joined him.

Neither felt too terribly energetic and there was little they could do but simply bask in the presence of their significant other. The slave was the first to break the solemn silence.

"Atemu, I'll see you again…won't I?" Yugi asked softly, trying to bury himself inside Atemu's chest, cuddling as close as he could. His gem eyes revealed his insecurities, his fears—fears that were mirrored in Atemu's eyes.

"I…I don't know, love." Atemu sighed, gently stroking Yugi's mauve-tipped hair.

Yugi peered up at Atemu warily, almost fearfully. "Why not? When I die, won't we…?" He couldn't finish. All the thoughts of death, losing Atemu, being alone and lost without his lover…his heart wrenched painfully.

Atemu mournfully shook his head, the same grim thoughts on his own mind. "Actually it's—well, technically, I'm not really going to die. My soul is going to be removed and confined in my puzzle. I'm going to be…trapped between life and death."

"So you're saying…" Yugi faltered for a moment, nearly choking on his words, "that I may never see you again. Not even in death."

"Not for a very long time, at the very least, Yugi." Atemu admitted, wishing once again that there were another way. It would not be the last time, either. "I'm sorry."

Yugi felt numb with pain, if that was even possible. He wanted to cry, to scream or sob, but he couldn't. It was too painful. How could life be that cruel? Why did fate hate them so? He had hoped, however morbid it might seem, that death would reunite them.

He could only lie against Atemu, hold and be held. Neither needed to say another word, really. There was a quiet understanding that passed between them. How Yugi was in pain and Atemu understood, how neither wanted this moment to end…it was all silently acknowledged as their broken hearts grieved.

----

That night was almost fiercely passionate and filled with a mutual desperation to be close. It was both fast and slow. An eternity and a moment. Salty tears were exchanged with clinging embraces, loving caresses and endless kisses.

No amount of words could sooth the pain, but were spoken with such need and love that they could believe—if only tonight—that they could.

Promise after promise of faithfulness and love, names breathed and cried in love and need and pain…

Those three little words could never be said enough, heard enough. They needed to be together, they needed to be whole, needed it as desperately as air. Forever, they would drift apart. They cursed fate, cursed death, but they could not change it.

Finally exhausted from their passion and no longer able to continue, the lovers lay in each other's arms, panting and letting the tears simply flow freely. Yugi clutched Atemu to him and managed to whisper his words of love again.

Atemu nodded, nuzzling his neck and sighed back the same, barely able to open his eyes to gaze back into Yugi's. He stroked Yugi's cheek lovingly. "I will always love you, Yugi. No matter what happens to me."

"And I you…no matter…where I go." Yugi breathed. They both lay still beneath the sheets, listening fondly to each other's heart as they drifted far away into dreams of what once was and would never be again.

-------

That morning was the most solemn and horrible morning that ever dawned in the history of humanity—as far as Yugi was concerned. He dragged himself out of bed in full-knowledge that these were their last hours together. He turned his eyes to Atemu and smiled whimsically.

The bed was a complete wreck after last night and Atemu was pretty much in the same state. Yugi was very sure he looked about as messy, but it hardly mattered. Especially with how cute Atemu looked, curled up like that and his hair all splayed…

Yugi wanted to wake Atemu up, but he knew it would be just like before. Atemu would need as much sleep as possible for the evening. The ritual would take everything his lover had in him to complete. With a pained look of utter longing, Yugi left the pharaoh to his dreams.

----

At about three or so in the afternoon, Atemu awoke, no longer able to take solace from the lonely bed. He got up, but just barely cared enough to get dressed. There was so little purpose in anything anymore. He found Yugi gazing up to the sky, perhaps praying one last time…he didn't know and didn't ask. Atemu merely wrapped his arms around Yugi in an almost practiced motion and rested against him.

Yugi didn't have to guess and didn't have to speak; he only returned the affection by leaning into the embrace. Neither dared to breathe a word.

Neither could bear to talk about what was going to happen and nothing else had any meaning or any point in being said. The quiet affection was enough, and if it wasn't, nothing ever would be. So they stayed there in silence, a few tears between the two, but nothing more…

Evening drew near quickly and Egypt's days were getting shorter in more ways then one. It was only more proof that destruction was coming and the shadows would not wait any longer.

Seth approached the pair and announced the ominous and inevitable statement they had both been expecting. "My pharaoh…it's time."

Atemu sent a nod to his cousin and looked back at Yugi, giving him another gentle, affectionate squeeze. All three exited and a dark cloud settled over them all…anyone who saw them would get the distinct impression that they were all going to a funeral…and they might as well have been.

-----

A three-person procession walked down a dark, candle-lit corridor. There was not a single sound of life between them, save the sound of breath. Quiet as the tomb—an image all tried to avoid. Atemu originally hadn't wanted Yugi to come, but…as painful as it would be—neither one of them could bare the separation in these last few moments. Yugi walked behind Atemu as his eyes stung and burned with unshed tears and his throat was strangled with relentless sobs; yet the silence was maintained.

When they had reached the ritual room at the end of the hallway, Yugi noted that it contained only the millenium puzzle, an old book, four restraints and…a dagger. A dagger?

Yugi looked to Atemu with concern and watched the pharaoh breathe a shaky sigh. His sad crimson eyes burned into the floor for a moment, as if seeking strength to continue. Perhaps finding it, Atemu glanced up at Seth, nodded and gave Yugi a weak smile.

Yugi's heart wrenched. He could not even find the strength to smile back. 'Atemu…'

His lover turned away and solemnly walked over to the wall with the shackles on it, then Seth helped him lock himself in place. Yugi cringed at the sight. 'Why?' He could not bear to ask.

Atemu now understood what real chains felt like. Their cold embrace welcomed him readily. For a moment, Atemu's thoughts turned to his prisoners. Wouldn't they love to know that their pharaoh was receiving such treatment? It didn't matter now. He could feel his energy slipping away. He had to finish the ritual soon. He brought back the words of the spell to his mind and his eyes slipped shut to block out the world as he began to chant them.

Seth followed Atemu's words in the book. There was no room for mistakes, but then, this was his cousin's forte. There wouldn't be any. Atemu was playing his part and Seth had to attend to his. He faltered for a moment, just a moment. Then he slowly picked up the dagger.

The priest approached his pharaoh and Yugi caught a small flash of metal. His eyes flew from his lover to Seth and when they landed on the weapon in his hand, Yugi's heart screeched to a halt. Atemu felt Seth's presence as he drew nearer. His eyes opened and met Seth's as the priest silently begged forgiveness for his next action. Crimson spoke only of grave understanding.

Gathering up his strength, Atemu continued his casting and inwardly braced himself, knowing that no matter what—he had to complete his objective, no matter how painful.

Seth drew the dagger from its sheathe and with one fluid movement, he slashed Atemu's wrist. Atemu grimaced in pain as he felt the ticklish sensation of oozing blood crawling down his hand and dripping to the floor. He continued chanting despite the mind-numbing pain.

Yugi was unable to look away, in spite of the horror he felt. Tears slipped from his gem eyes and splashed to the ground, as he watched the life drain away from Atemu.

Seth slit Atemu's other wrist, releasing more blood. Atemu faltered, temporarily losing focus and having to force himself to keep going. Yugi sobbed softly, seeing the pain in those beautiful ruby eyes.

It went on for a while, only blood and tears and endless words. But there came a sudden change when Atemu got to mid-spell. His eyes dimmed and his chest began to glow as a small orb of light formed. Yugi didn't understand why, but neither Atemu nor Seth seemed surprised.

Atemu felt his mind and body slowly going numb. As the orb grew, his consciousness and strength slipped away. As the light grew brighter, his eyes continued to darken. The chanting became hard pressed and breathy. Atemu vision began to blur and he quickly went through the last of the incantation, merely praying now for the strength to finish.

A fear that the end would never come seized Atemu's heart for an instant, but it was unjustified, for as the last words escaped his lips…he knew.

It was over. Surely, only a few last breaths remained in his body. He turned to Yugi and saw the tears streaming down his beloved's face. He managed a fragile smile. Yugi's eyes met his. Both saw so much pain.With the last of his strength, Atemu managed the breathe the words: "I love you."

But no matter how desperately he wished to, Yugi never had a chance to return the sentiment.

With a finally jerk, the light orb was removed from Atemu's chest and his whole body went limp like a rag doll. The chains that had once held him captive now held him protectively. Atemu's soul, which is what that orb had really been, was drawn inside the puzzle and it began to glow, receiving the pharaoh's soul. No one heard the shadows' scream of agony as it drifted across the desert sands. Eventually, the light died away, just as the memory of Atemu's sacrifice would one day.

Yugi broke down and flung himself at Atemu's lifeless body, clutching onto him and sobbing into his chest. He couldn't hold back his cries and didn't have any reason to. He breathed the pharaoh's name, over and over, but knew all too well that Atemu was far beyond the reach of his voice now. Lost to him was his lover…

Seth watched in grave silence as his cousin's beloved mourned his loss. A loss to be mourned by all of Egypt. The blood red sunset…Ra's death. Yet, there would be no rebirth for Egypt's Morning and Evening star. (2)

The brunet priest walked over to the heart-broken slave before him and placed a hand on his shoulder. Yugi stilled for a moment, though his tears would not. They refused to be held back any more then the life-giving Nile. He clung to his pharaoh, as trying to bury himself within his lover's chest.

Seth used a small key to unlock the restraints on Atemu and tried to pry Yugi off the pharaoh so he could carry him. At first, Yugi adamantly refused to release his death grip…
"He can't stay like this." Seth explained gently, coaxing him into letting go. "Atemu needs to be put to rest now, with the respect he deserves."

No matter how much Yugi wanted to plead with the priest to just leave him there, he did let go after that…though not before giving Atemu a salt-stained kiss. He would have given anything at that moment just to have Atemu kiss back.

Seth carried the former pharaoh from the room with Yugi following, his eyes on Atemu's face. It seemed pale, in spite of his tan. So lifeless—it hurt. It hurt so much. Yugi felt as if were he to only look back, he would find that his own heart lay broken and shattered on the ground.

Not even time, the greatest of healers, could cure such a wound…

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Yugi stood beside his pharaoh, who lay in solemn silence on his deathbed. He stroked Atemu's cheek lovingly… 'His face is so peaceful.' Yugi thought, with a bittersweet smile.
Peaceful—such a contrast to the agony raging inside of his slave lover. Yugi leaned down to place one last kiss upon the pharaoh's lips—one final goodbye.

Yugi rose quietly and turned to see that Seth had quietly joined them. Seth and Yugi stared into each other's eyes, each sensing each other's pain: Cold, solemn cobalt and mournful, dimming amethyst.

"Seth…" Yugi began, now staring hard into the floor as his heart throbbed with unbearable pain. "I—I love him. I can't live without him. Even if I could, I wouldn't want to."

Seth gazed at his cousin's lover with pity, placing himself in Yugi's sandals for a brief, contemplative moment. He knew why Yugi was telling him this. The slave was making a grave request. 'He's asking me not to stop him.'

Seth knew the options. Caught between a miserable life and an uncertain death. Seth's eyes darkened, realizing that he probably would have chosen the same. He answered only with a short nod, not knowing what else to do, and left quietly.

Yugi watched the priest leave with bittersweet relief. He had no wish to leave his beloved's side, but he left the room and searched for one last thing. Grasping it in his hand solemnly, he returned to Atemu's bed. "Someday, my pharaoh, I will find you again."

As this final promise fell from the slave's lips, he clutched the dagger in his hand—the very dagger that had slit Atemu's wrists. Yugi did not flinch as he raised it and thrust it into his own chest. (Forgive me, Yu-chan.)

And there, within his heart, the blade found a new sheath.

The pain was overwhelming and Yugi collapsed as his robes were quickly dyed the color of his lover's eyes. He made one last attempt to reach out to Atemu and with the last of his strength, he grasped the tanned hand in his own.

'Goodbye…'

-------------------------------------------

That evening, the entire palace was filled with the piercing silence of sorrow and mourning. Regrets and memories were shared without words, but by a sort of quietness, which spoke louder then any scream. As the day died away into a numbing blackness, a lone figure carried a small bundle in his arms, somber and grave were his strides. And to the grave he went, as befit his manner.

At the end of the longest walk in his life, he stopped to gaze at a form bellow: a shrouded body in whose welcoming arms he placed his burden. An eternal embrace, even in death. 'Together forever.'

"Atemu and Yugi would have wanted it this way…" Seth muttered gravely, cobalt eyes fixed upon his friend and his pharaoh. This was the only way they could be together—for now.
He left Yugi in Atemu's arms and went back to face the dark future of Egypt and her great loss…

----

Pain…

That's what he felt. Pain…everywhere. In his head and in his chest and in his arms and all over his entire body and it was driving him crazy! He opened his mouth to groan out his displeasure, but he heard nothing. He tried to blink, but he saw nothing. He tried to move and felt nothing.

…Except pain, that is.

Where was he? Why was it so horribly dark?

Dark and painful and cold.

He didn't know why. He couldn't remember why. His head hurt. His head hurt a whole lot and he wanted a massage now, because it hurt so much. Maybe Yugi could…

Yugi!

…It finally all flooded back to him, but even that was hazy. He was…well, actually, technically the point was that he wasn't—but he was in the puzzle right now. Well, at least, near as he could tell. His soul was supposed to have been put there during the spell of sealing. (3)

He vaguely remembered Seth and other people and what he was doing there. Not much seemed important right now, really. Especially considering the fact he was stuck there for Ra only knew how long. He kept feeling he'd forgotten something, though.

What had he forgotten? He just sort of sat…no, wait, he wasn't sitting. Standing? No. Not really. Hanging? Maybe. There was…a floor. He thought so, anyway. Well, he…was there in the dark, trying to remember. Let's see…

He knew he was a king or some such thing. And that he loved Yugi. And his cousin Seth annoyed him. And, he of course knew that he was…was…was…

…Was who?

He couldn't remember? He couldn't remember his name! That was awful! …Right? It was awful wasn't it? He was supposed to care—probably. But at the moment, in the dark, with that horrible ache...

Distantly, he could hear voices, as if they were far away in a tunnel or something. He tried desperately to listen.

"It's a pity, you know. He was a good king." One man said, a bit sadly and grunted softly, with some sort of effort as if he was doing something difficult.

"Mmm. It really is." Another man agreed with a sigh. "But, to add to it, I heard his lookalike died too. I believe his name was…Yugi?"

"What? Really?" The other seemed aghast. "He's dead? But how?"

"Well, I heard from a servant girl that Yugi couldn't take the pharaoh's death and he killed himself, poor thing. With a knife or something."

Within the puzzle, he felt his heart stop. If he had a heart still, that was. Yugi was dead? No, no—not his lover! Why? 'Oh, Yugi, I—wait, Yugi? Yugi…who? No! No, Yugi is…my beloved. I can't forget him.'

"How awful. Poor little guy. He was always so nice and cheerful." The second one sighed in agreement. "Such a tragedy. Still, it…had to be…I guess."

"I guess…" The other muttered and the voices vanished.

And so, he was now left to his thoughts. He'd wish they had said his name at least once so he could remember. 'Wait, that's NOT what's important, it's that Yugi…uh…what? What happened to—?'

Slowly the memories were ripped from him as he felt his headache increase tenfold. It eventually escalated to a point where he could have screamed if only he could open his mouth. Names vanished in his mind and years were shattered into non-existence.

Memories and loves and self were all wiped away and only a wretched void remained. He gradually forgot that he was even losing his memories, knowing only the darkness that was left in their place.

Lastly, a beautiful face lingered in his mind and for a brief moment, a name resurfaced …like a last little ember in a fire.

But it faded just as quickly when the flood of shadows extinguished the last of all he had once been.

The last sensation he knew was someone, someone strangely familiar, like the passing déjà vu of a forgotten dream, somehow picking something around him up and he heard a loud click. Something had broken…around him the darkness grew darker and he felt the pain come back. Another scream of agony tried to tear through his mute form, but it was yet again restrained. Other voices, evil and sorrowful ones filled his ears and mind with their sanity-forsaken whispers and murmurs in the blackness.

A desire in the deepest part of his being remained, one he could not name, a light he no longer knew, now unable to part with the darkness that had consumed him.

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I'M REALLY SORRY FOR SCARRING YOU ALL MENTALLY! DON'T HATE ME YET, KAY? READ THE EPILOGUE! SERIOUSLY!

Egyptian theology is good for a laugh.

Number notes:

1: Ra is supposedly the sun, really. The strongest force in Egypt, if you think about it. Which is probably why he's the Egyptian equivalent of Zeus. He's suppose to be born, travel across the sky, die when he completes his journey and then be reborn the next day.

2: A pharaohic title. "The morning and the evening star" was used to refer to the pharaohs, being earthly deities and such. I have yet to portray pharaoh Atemu in the historic sense. It's too cavalier, I know.

3: It's a pun. A stupid one. He's thinking that "I am…" and trailing off, because technically, the point is that he is no longer anything—because he's kind of dead. Get it?