This chapter is dedicated to my imagenary friend Susie, who I killed in a bloody rampage, after she decided to get anti-brest implants. Ungratful bitch! How dare she reject what I have given her? ... I know, I have problems.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything in this fanfic, so fuck off Pat! Update for Jebus's sake!
Matt awoke to Nana's sobbing.
Matt, slowly walking down stairs: This is why I don't fuck depressed chicks.
Matt then went downstairs, following a good smell. He was about to see what it was when he was confronted by GIR, Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura.
Naruto: Why didn't any of us have lines last chapter?
Matt: Because The Author forgot!
GIR: Let's make biscuits!
Peach, standing over a pot: Sure! They'll taste great with this stew!
GIR, wagging his tail: YAY!
Matt, smelling the pot: The smell's great! What kind of stew is it?
Peach: I made it from some skinny ass animal I found in that cage over there.
Matt: What ca... NO!
Matt noticed the empty cage that had held Pat.
Matt, gulping down the stew: Oh well.
Suddenly, a snorlax ghost appeared.
Pat: Hey, what's up?
Matt: GHOST!
Matt then created a giant wormhole and shoved the ghost inside. Pat ended up right next to a crying, half-pregnant Misty.
Pat: Semi-sweet!
Matt: Ok, time for the main storyline of this chapter, three... two... one... now.
Zelda, coming down the stairs: I've got good news! I'm switching back to men!
Link, WW. Link, and Ganondorf: FUCK YEAH!
Link's Fairy, snapping fingers: Oh man!
Zelda, cunt vibrating: Uh, I... gotta take a shit!
Zelda ran off to the bathroom. Suddenly a bus pulled up in front of the house.
Matt: NEW CHICK!
Matt ran outside to see the bus's door open. Then a dude steeped out wearing grey.
Matt, snapping fingers: Oh man!
Sheik: Hi! I'm Sheik!
Matt: Whatever, Zelda can show you your room.
Sheik: Uh,... Zelda, right. I'll just, uh, watch TV.
Matt: Your right! Dora the Explorers on!
Sheik: What?
Matt: All the cool people watch Dora!
Sheik: If you say so...
Matt and Sheik sat down on the couch.
Matt: Hey! Dora's on!
Link, Ganondorf, WW. Link, Kagome, Aang, Katara, Yoda, Inuyasha, Pikachu, Naruto, Sokka, Kirby, Mario, Peach, GIR, King Boo, Mewtwo, and Lucario ran down the stairs and sat on the couch.
Dora: Boots! Let's find a condom! Can you say condom?
Boots: Say condom! Say condom!
Smashers: Condom!
Dora: That's right! I think one's in my backpack!
Boots: Say backpack! Say backpack!
Smashers: Backpack!
Dora's Backpack: Hey everyone! Which one is the condom? Is it the sexy cat costume, the high-powered vibrator, or the condom?
Smashers: The condom! You fucking moron!
Dora: Yay! The condom! Let's commit bestiality!
Boots: Yay!
Dora and Boots then had hot monkey sex. The ending credits went by.
Matt: How the hell did Nick Jr. allow this on the air?
Peach: I don't know, but lunch is ready!
Matt: FOOD!
Matt knocked out the other contestants on the way to the pizza Peach had made.
Later,...
Link, eating pizza: If I didn't know better, I'd say Sheik was a chick.
Link's Fairy: NO DIP, YOU FUCKING R-TARD!
Link: How do you know?
Link's Fairy, blushing: You can tell by her various... features.
Link, reebering Sheik's man chest and crotch buldge: I don't know.
Sheik, skipping by, hands swaying from hip to hip: Tra-la-la! Time to go shopping!
Matt, getting up: I'll settle this!
Matt got up and ripped off Sheiks top, revealing two huge tits.
Matt: HOLY FUCK!
Sheik: That's right, I'm Zelda.
Matt slowly reached out and poked Sheik's tit.
Matt: Poke
Sheik/Zelda: YOU FUCKING PERVERT!
Zelda slammed Matt with the triforce, sending him through the roof, into his room, where he fell uncincious.
What I didn't end the chapter? Yes I did! Now just review lik good mindless slaves! I like pie! Meeps!