034. Not Enough

In Need of Silence

Sometimes all his diversions were just not enough to quiet the incessant pain. He knew that Cuddy and to a certain extent Wilson thought much of the pain was in his mind, psychosomatic. That he made it worse in order to drown out the parts of his life that caused him pain. That he sublimated the pain caused by Stacy into his leg so that he had an excuse, so that he wouldn't have to think about what her leaving meant to him. So that he could just say his leg hurt and the rest of him was fine.

He'd conceded deep in his own mind that they might be right but that didn't help when his leg was screaming and the Vicodin just wasn't working. On days like that, nothing would work to silence the pain. Not watching bad soaps, listening to music, playing games, baiting his colleagues, snarking at patients, nothing.

All he could do was lie still, hope like hell the Vicodin would finally kick in and try to distract himself. Or better still, hope that Wilson would come in and distract him…because nobody did it better. Because even when everything else wasn't enough to silence the pain, Wilson worked best of all.