She's Nothing Special 2
Itachi's character personality is based on the fictional character Marcus Flutie, from the book, Sloppy Firsts By Megan McCafferty
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or Sloppy Firts By Megan McCafferty.
Summary: ItaSakuSasu Sakura Haruno is a nobody at her junior high school and she has an impossible crush on Sasuke Uchiha, the most popular boy in school, who doesn't know she even exists. So, she vows to snag him as her boyfriend by the end of the year, and she even asks his older brother Itachi for advise, to win over Sasuke...
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" Like the old saying, a way to get into a man's heart is through his stomach."
" So Sakura, the first thing, your going to learn how to do is... how to cook." He said with his mouth curling up in a half smile, and while wearing a pink apron and holding up a cooking pan.
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Chapter 2
She gaped at him, with wide eyes. "Are you serious?"
"Very much. There's nothing more than a man apperciates than a good meal. The first task, you are going to learn is how to cook a man a perfect breakfeast, and then we'll move on." Itachi replied.
Great. Sakura couldn't even cook for her life. Even, though she lives by herself, she never really cooked too much. Mostly living off frozen meals and things like that. When her mother was alive, she mostly cooked not Sakura. And before she passed away, she never got the time to teach Sakura much about cooking. Cooking was not one of her specialities.
Itachi began taking out items out of the fridge and laid them all out on the kitchen table.
"Here's everything we need to start cooking. Watch closely." he said, turning up the the heat on the stove.
"We will be making the typical american breakfeast of bacon, eggs, toast and cheese. First, we will start cooking the bacon."
"Bacon? Is'nt that a bit hard to cook?" Sakura asked Itachi, nervously. Making bacon was quite messy.
He glared at her. "You want to be to able to cook or not?"
That shut up Sakura.
Itachi opened the pakaged sliced bacon, and slid the dull edge along the ledge between the strips, gently rocking to separate slices. "The first step is, if the packaged sliced bacon is cold from the refrigerator, slowly slide the dull edge of a butter knife along the length between the strips. Towel off the slices before cooking to avoid excess splattering. Usually, take out the bacon 30 minutes before cooking, but in this case it wasn't possible. "
He poured some oil into the pan. "The second step is to add a little oil in the pan. Wait about five minutes, until the pan is hot, and then start laying out the bacon in the pan. That is the most important step to make sure the pan is hot enough, or the bacon won't cook properly, which would be a problem."
The pan began to crackle and he began to lay out strips of bacon on the pan.
"Cook slowly, turning often, to render out the most fat and help reduce shrinkage. Use medium to medium-low heat. Pour or baste off the fat as it accumulates in the pan. When frying bacon, it's important to keep a close eye on it and turn it often. It can burn in the blink of an eye. Older bacon will cook and burn almost twice as quickly as fresh bacon. If strips overlap they won't cook evenly." Itachi explained.
Itachi started turning over the bacon and over around strips. " Turn bacon regularly as it cooks. Because pans have hot spots, move the strips around, switching ones in the middle with those on the outside. The bacon will take 5-10 minutes to cook, depending on the bacon, the pan and the heat."
After seven minutes, Itachi off the heat and start to pile the bacon on a plate. Then he poured the bacon fat from the pan into a container. " The fat rendered from the cooked bacon is highly-prized as a cooking oil for its flavor. After cooking the bacon, cool the rendered oil to room temperature and then pour through a fine sieve into a glass container. Cover and store in the refrigerator or freezer for future use. If you don't want to use the the bacon fat, let it cool to room temperature and then pour it into a disposable contair, seal, tie it in a bag and throw it out in the trash. Don't ever pour it down the drain, for it will clog it."
"We are done making the bacon. Now we will make the eggs." Itachi said.
He took out a new pan and set it up on the stove, he removed the pan he used to make the bacon and placed in the sink.
"Eggs can be cooked in different, fried, poached, baked or steamed. We will be making poached eggs, which isn't a fattenting as the typical ommelete or fried eggs. In most cases you would stir and beat the egg until it's a smooth liquid, but not this time."
Itachi rummaged through his kitchen cabinets until he found a measuring cup. Then he filled it with water and poured into the pan and added pinched of salt before turning up the heat on the stove.
"First, fill the pan or skillet with three inches of water. Add a pinch of salt and bring the water to boil. Now, in a seperate shallow bowl, crack the egg."
He cracked the eggs expertatly in the shallow bowl and then slowly added the egss to the skilled.
"Now reduce the heat of the skillet before adding the eggs. Gently slide the egg out of the bowl into the skillet. Set the heat of the skittle just enough so that the heat keeps the whites tender and the yolks moist. Leave the eggs to cook. Three minutes for medium firmness, 2 minutes for runny eggs and four to five minutes for a firm eggs. I like firm eggs, so in this case the eggs will cook for five minutes."
Sakura peered over Itachi's shoulder and watched the eggs cook. It was amazing. They look like floating angels or ghosts or a jellyfish."
The eggs were changing shapes, bubbling and popping, and flowing strands of white seemed to appear from the yolk.
After 5 minutes, Itachi gently picked up one of the eggs with a slotted spoon and felt it with his finger.
"After the time you set your eggs to cook, lift one egg on a slotted spoon, so the water can drain and feel the egg with your finger to check if it's done. If the egg is little more runny than you want it, carefully set it back down in the water. In this case, the eggs are nice and firm."
He began to set the eggs one by one on paper towl.
"Finally the last step, is to place the eggs on a paper towl to remove all excess liquid. Now, it's time to make the toast and cheese, the easist part."
Itachi removed a loaf of bread and some cheese slices from the fridge.
He took two pieces of bread and put the in the toaster.
"Take two pieces of bread slices and place it in the slots of the toaster. Set it on light, so you don't burn the toast, but make it cripsy enough. You will know when the toast is done, when the toaster makes a sound and the toast slices pop out."
Soon enough, the toaster make a sound and the toast popped out. The toast was perfect and crispy. Itachi put the toast on a plate and placed a slice of cheese on each piece. Then he put the toast in the microvave.
"Place a slice of cheese on the toast and put the toast in the microvave. In this case, generally a convetional microvave oven would work, but I don't have one. Set the microvave for 35 seconds on HIGH for the cheese to melt."
The microvaved beeped and the toast was done, sizzling with melted cheese.
Itachi placed some bacon and eggs on a piece of toast on a plate.
"All done. Now eat." he said.
Sakura looked at him if he was crazy. "You want me to eat it? Aren't I suppose to be learning how to make the food."
"Just eat it."
Sakura sat down and ate a piece of bacon. It was good crispy and not very oily. She wolfed everything down in seconds.
That was good! Who knew he was such a good cook? Most males can't even cook.
"Was it good?"
"That was delicious! Where did you learn how to cook?" Sakura asked him.
Itachi stared at her. "When I was young, I watched my mother cook."
"Oh." Sakura could tell he didn't want to talk about it anymore.
He smirked.
"I hope you payed attention, because now it's your turn to make the food, repeating me exactly. While, I take a ciggerate break. When your done, I'll come back and taste the food. "
Sakura's eyes widened.
Oh shit. That wasn't what I was expecting.
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Tendrils of smoke swirled around Itachi as he puffed on his ciggerate.
I can only imagine what she's doing in the kitchen. Probably making a mess.
He smirked. This is going to be fun. Be ready my foolish younger brother, I'm going to knock you out of your shoes.
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Meanwhile, Sakura was flustered.
How long was I suppose to cook the bacon? Was is it fifteen minutes? She thought panickedly, while cooking the poarched eggs in water.
Suddenly the kitchen started to smell like something was burning.
Sakura whipped around, and checked the bacon, which was cooking in another pan.
She slapped her forehead. The bacon was burned, extremly oily and not crispy at all. She set aside the skillet with the bacon in it and focused on her eggs.
She gently tried to lift an egg with a slotted spoon, except she forgot a very important step: she had to check if the eggs were actually done before lifting one up and placing it on a plate.
SPLAT! The runny not done egg fell from the spoon and back into the pan, the yolk splashing everywhere, ruining and splattering the other eggs with yolk and white.
Sakura wanted to bang her head against a table. Nothing is working for me, she thought miserably.
Then she remembered, that she had the toast in the toaster.
Oh no!
She rushed towards the toaster, but it was too late. The bread was burned and too cripsy.
Sakura groaned. She would have to start all over again.
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Itachi outlit his ciggerate and smushed it with his shoes. It was time to go back inside and see what Sakura was doing.
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Sakura was exhausted.
She had finished cooking the bacon, but the bacon was far from crispy, was very oily and didn't cook done. But Sakura thought it was passable.
She was also was almost done with the toast, which was currently toasting in the toaster.
Now, it was time to cook the eggs. She didn't want to make poached eggs and decided to make fried eggs instead.
Sakura wiped her sweaty forehead. She rushed to the skillet carrying the bowl, sloshing with the stirred and beated eggs yolks.
SMACK! was the sound as Sakura smashed into a hard wall of flesh, falling down on to the floor face-frist, splattering stirred egg yolks every where.
She looked up and saw Itachi; face covered in gooey stirred egg and his onyx eyes were looking at her in amusement and irritation.
Then she blushed. She had brought Itachi down with her too. Her body was on his, her almost non-exsistent breasts were smushed against his hard torso.
To make things even worst, the fire alarm went off and the kitchen was filled again with a burning smell.
"I'm assuming, you didn't get too much done. Am I right?" he asked her.
Sakura just wanted to die then and there.
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a/n: I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Let me tell you, it is extremly hard to write about Itachi teaching Sakura, well... how to cook. That's not really Itachi style... to cook.
So, yeah. But let me tell the rest of the chapters, which I got planned out are hilarious. Can imagine Itachi as a fashion advisor? And Itachi asking Sakura to pee in a yogurt cup? Well, you can now.