002. Back Alley

Evasion Tactics

House slouched down in a booth at the back of the bar and eyed the beer he'd bought. He didn't really have any intention of drinking it; he'd just wanted the excuse for being in here. He was mostly trying to avoid Cuddy and after being nearly found in his office, the clinic, Wilson's office, coma guy's room and the obstetrics lounge, he'd fled the hospital. He knew what she wanted him for – a high profile but extremely boring case that he had no intention of taking. Now if it had been high profile and interesting, he might have let her find him but for boring he was definitely out of the office.

"Why are we here?"

House's head shot up at the sound of Foreman's irritated voice and he carefully peered over the back of the booth.

"Because Dr Wilson said House occasionally comes here and since he isn't at home or anywhere else Dr Wilson thought he might be, this is kind of the last resort," Chase replied patiently.

"You know, if he's going to these kinds of lengths to avoid this case, maybe he's got a point."

Cameron sounded tolerantly amused when she said that and House mentally gave her a day off being heckled in response, both for being right and her tone of voice.

He saw that the unholy trio were heading towards the bar and he took the opportunity to slide out of the booth and head towards the back door. He pushed it open and limped out into the back alley, letting the door shut quietly behind him. He leaned against the wall for a moment then turned towards the entrance of the alley to find Wilson leaning against the wall as well, hands shoved into his pockets, looking amused and slightly triumphant.

"You squealed," House said with a scowl.

Wilson looked vaguely repentant. "Well, in my defence, I didn't actually think you'd be here. Speaking of which, why are you here?"

"Cuddy wants me to take a patient," House grumbled.

Wilson looked confused. "She…can do that."

House limped towards Wilson. "This one's famous apparently," he said in tones of disgust.

House came to a halt in front of Wilson and leaned against the wall again.

"You've treated famous patients before," Wilson replied.

"They were interesting," House snapped. "This one's boring. Blind Freddy and his dog could treat him. She doesn't need me."

"So…you're avoiding her," Wilson said slowly.

"Yep," House said smugly then he scowled again. "And I was doing really well until you opened your trap to the three amigos in there."

Wilson snickered. "They're inside? I'm surprised you've stayed here this long then. At least one of them is going to think to check the back exit."

House froze for a moment then a smile grew on his face that could only be described as evil. He pushed off the wall and advanced on Wilson.

"Then I'm going to have to make sure they never come looking for me again," he said wickedly. "And while I'm at it, I intend to make sure you don't ever tattle on me again."

Wilson raised an eyebrow and started looking slightly worried. "Oh? How?"

House moved a bit faster and had his body plastered against Wilson's, pressing him into wall, before Wilson could react. He leaned in a little harder, smiling at Wilson's indrawn breath, and leaned his cane against the wall. He then slid his hands under Wilson's jacket and kissed him.

Wilson was still for a moment then, with a tiny whimper, he gave in and returned the kiss, his hands gripping House's hips tightly. House hummed his approval and worked his good leg between Wilson's, pressing their hips together as he deepened the kiss. With the small fraction of his mind that wasn't consumed by what he was doing and how it felt, he heard the back door of the bar open.

"Maybe he went out…" came Foreman's voice in tones that ranged from bored to a startled yelp as he broke off his sentence then he said weakly, "here."

This statement was closely followed by Chase's "Holy crap!" and a gasp that had to come from Cameron.

House could feel Wilson tensing and he slid the hand that was hidden from view from the door around until he could scrape his fingers over Wilson's nipple through his shirt. The moment he did he felt the tension flow out of Wilson and the other man moaned into his mouth, one hand shifting to clench in his shirt.

"Uh, I think we should go," Foreman said, his voice rippling with laughter.

"Yeah, we'll just tell Cuddy that we couldn't find him," Chase added, his amusement also plain in his voice. "'Cause I'm sure as hell not telling her about this."

"Yeah," Foreman said then he spoke a little louder. "And you two need to get a room."

House heard the door close on the laughter of Foreman and Chase with a bang. The sound seemed to get through to Wilson because a moment later he felt hands on his chest pushing him back. He drew backwards obediently but kept his body pressed against Wilson's as he looked at his lover's face, expecting to see a little irritation amongst the lust. Instead he was surprised to find exasperated amusement.

"Did you have to do that?" Wilson said dryly.

"Yes, because it worked," House replied with a quick grin.

Wilson gave a small quirk of a smile. "So what now?"

"Well, I thought Foreman had a good idea," House said, letting his thumb brush over Wilson's nipple again.

Wilson's eyes fluttered for a moment then he grinned. "That happens from time to time."

House reached out and grabbed his cane before stepping away. He gestured towards the entrance of the alley with a jerk of his head and said, "Let's go."

Wilson cleared his throat and straightened his clothes before joining him. "And they say romance is dead," he observed.