Chapter 8

"Are you saying you would step back and let me have her?" Robin asked Jax

Jax hesitated. He knew Robin would be a wonderful influence on a child. Angel baby would be lucky to have her. And he could see how much Robin wanted this, yet was afraid to want this, written all over her face.

Though his body felt colder already, his life emptier, he said "Yes, I'll retract my petition. But I hope you will let me be her Uncle Jax."

"Of course!" Robin hurried over and hugged him.

Jax said, "Congrats, little mama, it's a girl."

Jax went straight home. He could have gone to work and tried to concentrate on business. He could have called Carly and let her comfort him.

But he wanted to be alone.

His mind replayed a conversation he had with Carly. They were at her house the night she first suggested adopting Angel.

Was that only a few days ago? he wondered

It felt like years now.

Carly sat next to him on the couch and took his hand. "I know you said you'd think about it but let me explain why I think you need to do this."

She took a deep breath and started to plea, "This is not about you. Although I know you want children and will be a good dad. This is about Angel Baby though. She was thrown away. And even if you think that she will never remember it since she was so young that is not true. She might not remember the feeling of being in that picnic basket. But she will always carry with her a sense that she was disposable. Even if no one tells her the truth about her birth she will feel it. I did. And then if she does not have a good man in her life, a dad she can rely on, to make her believe she is worth something she will turn to some other man when she is old enough and hope he will fill the void. You could save her from that. And maybe if another family takes her she will be okay. Maybe. But maybe is hard to sleep with at night. I need to know she is getting what she needs in order to fill up some of that endless hole she'll have, like I do, that comes when you start off life unwanted."

"But won't she need a mother?"

"I'm not going anywhere. I'll be right here for whatever she needs, if you let me. But I am not doing this for me. If you and I break up and you remarry then I won't try and stop Angel from bonding with your wife. As long as she is not a raging bitch monster or something."

"I'll try not to marry one of those."

"Good."

"I want to know that Angel is safe as much as you do."

"Then make her safe. Bring her home."

Jax walked into the spare bedroom in his apartment. This is where John, Spencer now, once slept. This would have been Angel's room.

But Robin will do right by her, Jax thought, and I couldn't deny Angel the chance to be raised by a married couple.

Robin and Patrick were alter bound, Jax believed, while him and Carly were far from it. They had thought about marriage last Christmas and decided that it wasn't in the cards for them. Dating was enough for now.

And I can still be around Angel, all the time, as her Uncle Jax.

The last two words stuck in his mind. He tried to push down his disappointment but it felt like a lump lodged in his throat that would not go away.

Emily walked into the living room at Wyndermere and heard a baby laughing. She called out, "Hello?"

"Down here."

She walked around the couch and saw Nikolas and Spencer on a blanket on the floor. The sight made her heart melt. The one year old reached out for her.

Emily say down and picked up Spencer. "How has my boy been today? Good. I hope so. I missed you, Spency."

"We missed you, too." Nikolas said, his voice low and sexy.

Their eyes met. Emily and Nik had been dating for a while again but staying away from the subject of marriage.

"Thanks for the flowers." she said "I guess you're right. I shouldn't adopt right now. I need a husband before I have a kid."

Nikolas reached out and touched her leg."Stay here with us and you can have both."

Carly looked up when someone entered the nursery, expecting to see Jax, but it was Robin. Carly didn't bother to say hi. She just looked back down at Angel Baby.

"It's time for her to go home." Robin said softly

Carly looked back up. "Is Jax in the hallway?"

"No. I'm taking her home with me."

"Says who?"

"The social worker. And don't you dare get huffy and upset my daughter."

"Just like that she's now your daughter?"

"I suppose you have some ugly comment you want to throw at me about how I won't live long enough to raise her so I shouldn't have her at all?"

"Will you?"

"You are not really asking me that, are you, Carly?"

Carly stood and placed the baby in her bed. She pointed to the hall and Robin and her went out there.

Carly said, "What happened to Jax applying to adopt her?"

"I've spoken to him. He supports this decision."

Carly rolled her eyes. "You always do this stuff! Con men by batting your big brown eyes. Playing Saint Robin. Jax wanted her. He loves her already."

"And he will be part of her life."

Carly sighed and crossed her arms over her chest. "This sucks."

Robin said, "I will be good to her. She'll have a good home. Isn't that all that matters?"

"Good is not nearly good enough for her. I want the best, Robin." Carly bit her lip.

In her heart she knew Robin would provide a stable home and be a Betty Crocker mom. She would be old fashioned and strict. That was just Robin. But Carly feared she was being pushed out of Angel Baby's life.

And Carly knew she could help that child to cope with feelings of rejection.

In a soft voice, Carly added, "Don't ever let her feel not enough in your eyes. Don't let her think that because her mom threw her out that she is trash. Because she will think that if you don't tell her different. Show her she is better than that." Carly's eyes shone with unshed tears.

Robin was touched by the show of emotion from Carly. She whispered, "I promise I will."

"You better."

Robin smiled, "As long as we live in the same town I bet I'll be getting tons of this unsolicited advice, won't I?"

Carly turned and stared through the glass at the baby. "Count on it."

Author's note- Thanks for all the reviews. More chapters to come soon.