Fear and Love Chapter 4: Conquering Fear, a star wars fanfic

Well, this is the last and final chapter of this tale. This chapter is all about Jacen and his fear of proposing to Tenel Ka. I could've had one of the other segments as the ending for this story but I felt that Jacen's segment( the way it flows and ends) was a more fitting as an ending than the Jag and Ben's segments.

Here it is. The conclusion to this story.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I have faced many challenges. Have overcome incredible odds. Have gone toe-to-toe with deadly foes…so WHY THE HECK AM I AFRAID OF THIS!? Jacen thought to himself as he slowly walked up the steps that lead to Theed Castle's entrance. Maybe because I know this is an automatic lose situation.

Within Jacen, confidence was nowhere to be found. Fear and lack of confidence dominated him. He wasn't even near Tenel Ka yet and already he felt incredibly nervous. He hadn't felt this nervous since the day he took Tenel Ka out on their first real date and sadly, that night didn't go as perfectly as he had hoped. Now he feared that today was going to end in disaster.

I might as well as put this down as one of the worst days of my life. The moment I propose to her, she's going to turn me down quicker than I can say 'Ewok'. Why am I even doing this? Jacen thought sadly to himself.

Jacen was almost to the entrance, but frankly he wasn't in a hurry. He loved Tenel Ka with all his heart, but he knew that not even the power of love could overcome the laws of royalty. The fact was, she was a queen mother of Hapes and he was just a poor little Jedi Knight. Even though she was a force user herself, Jacen highly doubted that she'd want to marry a guy who makes Force using his main and only profession.

Why would she marry a guy like me? She probably prefers marrying someone of royalty. Someone suave, classy, and dangerously handsome…okay, maybe I fit into the 'dangerously handsome' category. But still, a prince or a king would be more to her liking for marriage. Jacen thought as he walked up the final steps.

As he approached the entrance, two royal guards, whom automatically knew who he was just by looking at him, immediately greeted him.

"Greetings, master Jedi. Please state your business inside the castle." The first guard said in a polite tone.

That was one thing about the Nubians. They were always very polite, which explains why they never had many wars.

Now if only every planet could be like Naboo and its residents. We wouldn't have so many dumb wars. Jacen thought as he politely replied. "I came to see Queen Mother Tenel Ka."

"Queen Mother Tenel Ka is currently speaking with the Queen. But you may still precede on forward, Master Jedi." Said the second guard.

Jacen gave a nod then proceeded on forward into Theed Castle. He walked down a few hallways then stopped and reached out with the Force. He could feel Tenel Ka's presence emitting from somewhere outside.

Jacen folded his arms and thought for a second. Outside…hmm…she and the queen must be in the garden.

He breathed out a sigh then continued down the hall, which would eventually lead him to a path to the garden. As he strolled down the giant halls of Theed Castle, several frightful thoughts of what could happen when he proposes appeared in his mind. She was going to turn him down for sure, but what made him more frightened was the mere thoughts of how she was going to do it.

Jacen knew it was going to sting real badly when she says 'no' to his proposal. It was actually starting to make him feel downright depressed. In fact, the fear inside him started to deplete and be replaced by pure sadness.

He really wished he could be Tenel Ka's husband. A perfect one that would love her, comfort her, and just, well, spend every minute of everyday with her. But no matter how much he wished, he knew that such a wish would never come true.

It only took him about a minute to get to the garden. He took a few steps then stopped and looked around the colorful but quite beautiful environment. He finally spotted Tenel Ka and Queen Teraia walking and chatting happily side by side with…three handmaidens following behind them.

Oh no. Jacen thought miserably to himself. It was one thing asking Tenel Ka for a private chat with one woman around, it was another thing asking her with four women around watching. It was going to be extremely uncomfortable and Jacen knew it.

Maybe I should wait until later. Or better yet, just call it off since I already know what her answer is going to be. Jacen thought as he took a retreating step backwards, which ended up being a huge mistake.

Jacen was so wrapped up in his thoughts that he didn't even notice it through the Force. While he had been scanning the area for Tenel Ka and thinking to himself, one of the queen's white Nubian cats had snuck by and laid itself a foot away from Jacen's foot.

So the moment his foot stepped on the cat, the feline gave out a very loud and pain filled cry.

"Woah!" shouted Jacen.

The cat's cry of pain startled Jacen so much that it caused him to stumble side ways, fall backwards off the path, and land smack into a flowerbed. Jacen just laid there flat on his back wondering what did he do to the universe to deserve this.

Can the day get any worst? Jacen thought to himself miserably.

"Jacen!" a worried Tenel Ka shouted as she, the queen, and the handmaidens rushed over to where Jacen was.

Yep, it gets worst. Thought Jacen.

The five women stopped and that's when Tenel Ka reached down and helped Jacen out of the flowerbed.

"Jacen, are you alright?" Tenel Ka asked in a concerned tone as she gently placed her hand on his arm.

"Uh…yeah, I'm…just fine." Jacen said awkwardly as he flicked off a pink flower petal.

The three handmaidens giggled as he tried to get the remaining few pink petals out of his hair. Their giggles just made Jacen feel even more humiliated.

"I'm glad you're alright, Master Jedi." Said the 20-year-old black haired and brown eyed Queen Teraia.

Jacen gave a quick thin smile then looked to his left and saw the small white cat sitting on the branch of a nearby tree.

Thanks a lot, buddy. Jacen thought sarcastically as he glared at the cat.

"Jacen, what are you doing here anyway?" Tenel Ka asked curiously as she folded her arms across her chest.

Jacen looked at Tenel Ka and the four women then said. "Oh, I uh…uh…"

The five women were staring at him and it was making him feel really nervous and uncomfortable. In fact to Jacen, it felt like their stares were making him shrink to the size of an atom.

He breathed out a sigh then finished. "I came here because I needed to talk to you about something."

"Really? About what?" Tenel Ka asked.

Jacen briefly looked at Queen Teraia and her handmaidens then back at Tenel Ka. "Um…in private." He said uncomfortably.

"Oh." Replied Tenel Ka.

Queen Teraia and her handmaidens smiled and gave each other knowing looks.

"We understand." Said Teraia. She then looked at her handmaidens. "Come, ladies. Let's leave these two lovers to their privacy."

The handmaidens giggled while Jacen and Tenel turned red at that statement. Jacen, however, was redder. The handmaidens, who still had smiles on their faces, gave a nod then turned and began making their way towards the exit.

Queen Teraia looked back at the couple and said. "I'll talk to you later, Queen Mother. And you too, Master Jedi."

"See yah, your Highness." Said Tenel Ka with a smile.

"Yes, good bye, your Highness." Jacen said very politely.

Queen Teraia smiled then turned and walked towards the exit.

Sadness was once again rising in Jacen for he knew it was soon going to be time to propose……and get rejected.

Tenel Ka looked at Jacen then asked in an interested tone of voice. "So what did you want to talk to me about?"

"I, uh…just wanted to, uh…uh…" Jacen said as he looked at Tenel Ka with a nervous expression on his face.

Tenel Ka gave Jacen a funny look then walked closer to him. She was waiting for him to finish his sentence but she was also getting concerned.

At this point, fear and sadness were swirling in Jacen like a violent tornado. He was afraid of rejection and sad because he knew that he was going to get rejected. And that's when his nervous expression became one of sadness.

He wished that things could go like in his dreams. Where he proposes to Tenel Ka and she happily accepts. But sadly in reality, the worst-case scenarios always have a high chance of occurring.

No matter what I do or say right now, it's going to end on a sour note. Despite all the love I give her, she'll never love me enough to be my wife. Jacen thought sadly. Let me get this over with.

Jacen looked Tenel Ka with sadness in his eyes. For a while, he just stared into the eyes of the 37-year-old Hapan queen mother. To Jacen, Tenel Ka was the most beautiful woman in the cosmos. She had long red hair and stunning gray eyes. She had a slim figure and was currently wearing one of her green Hapan outfits that showed off a little bit of her skin and cleavage.

Tenel Ka didn't break eye contact with Jacen. With love and care in her eyes, she walked closer to Jacen and gently placed her hand on his cheek.

"Jacen…what's wrong?" she asked with concern in her voice.

Jacen took her hand and without thinking, leaned down and kissed her on the lips softly and lovingly. Tenel Ka was a little surprised by his actions but she soon kissed him back with the same fervor. He let go of her hand then immediately wrapped his arms around her and deepened the kiss.

As soon as Tenel Ka placed her hand behind Jacen's head, their kiss had become more intense and full of emotion. Every bit of love that Jacen felt for Tenel Ka, he expressed in that one kiss. He was kissing her like as if it was the last time he'd ever get to hold her and kiss her. This was his way of telling her that he loved her more than anything.

Jacen didn't know how long he and Tenel Ka had been kissing intensely and passionately. All he knew was that it felt like bliss.

Tenel Ka finally broke their intense tongue-dancing kiss slowly and then took several breaths.

"Wow…"Tenel Ka said as she took a few more breaths. "Talk about a kiss that can take a woman's breath away. Wow."

Jacen looked at her with an expression that was a mixture of sadness and love. He caressed her cheek then said sincerely. "I love you."

Tenel Ka smiled and replied softly. "I love you too."

She then asked. "Is that what you wanted to tell me earlier?"

Jacen slowly shook his head. "No." he said. "That wasn't it. It's actually more like a question that I want to ask you."

"What is it that you want to ask me?" Tenel Ka asked with an interested look on her face.

Jacen took a deep breath then took her hand.

"I know what you're probably going to say." Jacen said as he looked into her gray eyes lovingly. "But I don't care anymore. You…make my heart complete. Tenel Ka-."

He then got down on one knee with her hand in his.

"Queen Mother Tenel Ka, I love you more than life…will you be my wife?" Jacen asked sincerely and affectionately.

He didn't even attempt to look at her reaction. He just bent his head down and closed his eyes like as if he had already lost.

Tenel Ka, who had a loving smile on her face, squeezed his hand gently and said. "Jacen. Jacen Solo."

Jacen opened his eyes and looked up at her. This is it. The rejection.

Tenel Ka stared him in the eye and then added. "I would be more than honored to be your wife."

Jacen blinked. He couldn't believe it. Is this…a dream? No…it couldn't be. She really…she really said 'yes'! Jacen thought as a big happy grin formed on his face.

As soon as Jacen stood up, Tenel Ka kissed him on the lips. He wrapped his arms around her and returned the kiss. They both slowly broke their kiss then looked at each other with happy smiles on their faces.

Jacen then picked Tenel Ka up by the waist and twirled her around. She giggled and he too gave out a little laugh.

This was the happiest day of Jacen's life…well, at least until the wedding day.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

THE END
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

That was it. Jacen, Jag, and Ben conquered fear itself and are now even more intimate with the women they love. I hoped you all enjoyed this story.