Chapter Six
Carlos was up early the next morning, and just as Hop Sing started breakfast, he came inside from feeding the animals and strode towards Raquel's room. He knew she'd still be sleeping, but when she awoke, he needed to talk to her.
He shut the door quietly behind him and looked at her, asleep on the bed. She looked better already; some of the color had returned to her face. She also looked relaxed while she slept, and Carlos wasn't about to wake her, not after what had happened the last time she'd awoken suddenly.
He quietly picked up a chair that was set against the wall and placed it, backwards, about a foot and a half from the bed. He straddled it and rested his arms on the back of it as he watched her.
He wasn't sure how to bring up the whole subject of the day before. He didn't want it to be true, - he still hoped it wasn't – but he knew there was no other explanation. Still, he wanted to hear Raquel's side of the story.
Something banged in the kitchen, and Carlos flinched. He listened as Little Joe apologized to Hop Sing about something or other. These walls really were paper-thin.
He looked down at Raquel as she blinked and looked at him with a smile.
"Buenos dias," she greeted him, and he wished he could return the smile.
"Raquel, we need to talk about yesterday."
She frowned as she carefully sat up, but she didn't say anything. She just watched him.
"Why was he looking for you?" He paused, waiting for her to reply. She didn't, she only dropped her gaze. "Raquel, are the things he told us true?"
Raquel glanced in the other direction, but this time she replied. "Some of it is."
"Some of it?"
"Most of it." she sighed and looked back at him. "I am sorry. I wish you hadn't learned of it this way."
Carlos was slightly irritated at her for putting her answers off. "Raquel, I need to know the truth. As do the Cartwrights…we have the right to know."
She nodded and sighed again. "Alright, I will tell you. It started right after the fire. I was so angry, so enraged, Carlos. I had to take it out on someone besides myself. I traveled south and started stealing things…first it was just to survive; I took food from stores, and money from people's pockets. But when I was not getting caught, I decided that I deserved more.
"I stole a horse and continued southeast, towards Texas. I was in a town near Santa Fe one night when I heard shooting from an alleyway. When a large man ran from the shadows, I went to investigate. Lying in the middle of the alley was a dead man, and in his right hand was a pistol. I decided that I needed it more than he did, and that he would not miss it. So now I was armed, but it only took seconds for me to find out that the gun was empty.
"So I searched the man over until I found some ammunition in his coat pocket. In the box of bullets there was also a twenty dollar gold piece, which I quickly relieved him of." Raquel took a deep breath and looked away from Carlos's disapproving stare.
"The next morning I went to the town's clothing store and bought some men's clothes, claiming they were for my husband. Then, dressed in those clothes with my hair in the hat, I went to the livery stable and sold the horse I had stolen. Then, I set my eyes on the General store and the six bay horses tied in front of it.
"Yes, I robbed the General store and stole the first horse I saw when I ran back outside. I galloped that horse until he could barely stand. Only then did I stop. I didn't sleep at all; every sound I heard I thought was a Marshal there to hang me.
"But either no one came after me, or I had lost them entirely. So…when I got to Texas, I tried it again. And it worked." Raquel looked up at him, but once again had to look away. "By that time I figured that I had tried my luck for awhile. I hid in a shack in Texas for nearly a month before I moved on.
"And I continued on like that for the last few years." She finally looked him in the eyes and didn't look away. She reached up and placed her hand on his arm. "Carlos, please don't be angry with me…I'm not proud of what I've done. I'm trying to change."
Carlos resisted the urge to push her hand away. "You are not finished."
She looked down and removed her hand. "No, I am not. The time I returned, looking for you, I could not find Isabella either. She wasn't at Rancho Rivera, so I assumed her to be either with family, or dead. About a year ago, I decided to find out what had happened to her. I was in Mexico at the time, so I began for home. Although…I suppose it is not home anymore. However, somewhere in the Arizona Territory, I discovered that someone was following me. I managed to get him off my trail, but I had to head back to Mexico to do that. When I began again, it was not until nearly a week ago that I realized someone was following me again. I think it was the same person as the first time.
"About six hours before I came upon the Ponderosa, he caught up to me. I recognized Marshall Collier because we had met before, in Texas. He held a gun on me and told me that he was going to take me back to Texas, but I managed to knock the gun from his hand and get on my horse. Minutes later he shot the horse out from under me, and we began to shoot at each other for a little while. When his fifth shot landed in my side, I spooked his horse with my last two shots by spraying dirt in his face. This delayed him long enough for me to escape. And then, well, I came here by chance. In the dark and all, I at first thought that I'd found Rancho Rivera."
Both Carlos and Raquel were silent for awhile after that. Carlos couldn't believe what she had just told him. The woman he had loved was an outlaw.
Raquel stared off towards the wall again as she spoke. "I know that is not what you wanted to hear, Carlos, but it is the truth. I could not lie to you and tell you that Collier was after me for the wrong reasons. I am sorry."
Carlos couldn't help but think that her tone seemed to be asking for pity. She'd deceived him, and now she was asking him to pity her? He couldn't do that. "Raquel, you have changed." He said, as he stood.
She looked up at him with a bit of surprise. "I know I have, Carlos, but seeing you alive…you've got to believe me!" Raquel pleaded as Carlos walked to the door. "Please, Carlos, I love you…I cannot change the past, but I can change the future!" but her words fell on deaf ears as Carlos stormed out of the room, through the kitchen, past the looks of the entire Cartwright family, and out the front door.
He still couldn't believe what Raquel had told him. How could she have done so much wrong? How many people had she killed in the process of taking money that didn't even belong to her?
Then again, did it really matter at this point? What had been done was done; there was no way to fix it now. But that seemed worse; should she get what was coming to her or should she be spared?
Carlos paced back and forth in the barn. That was what he couldn't figure out. She had said herself that she'd done things that were illegal…she wouldn't lie about that. Not to him. So that meant that she deserved government punishment and that meant turning her over to Collier.
But Carlos didn't want to do that to her.
Despite what he told himself, he loved her, and nothing could change that.
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