Disclaimer: They aren't mine, got it! Godammit! Punk!

RATED R (seriously)

Another one of my one-shots. Enjoy!

A Day Without Yuki

I'll be gone for the day. Don't try to find me or I'll kill you.

- Yuki

Shuichi read the note Yuki had left for him on the side table over and over again.

Where had he gone?

Why had he left him all alone?

"Yuki! WHERE ARE YOU!" Shuichi cried, remembering the last time Yuki had left him and had run off to marry Ayaka, the girl Yuki was engaged to. And even though their parents had arranged the engagement, it still didn't change the fact that Yuki would soon belong to someone else.

Yuki had said since he couldn't even make Shuichi stay away from him within a 5 feet radius, Yuki would instead stay away from him. Shuichi remembered how he had run into Eiri Yuki's former home and screamed, "FUCK YOU, EIRI YUKI!" into the quiet, empty room. Of course, being the drama queen that he was (and still is), Shuichi had had a very negative side effect to Yuki's lack of recognition towards him.

"You just used me and now you're gonna go off and get married!! Give me back my innocence and my virginity, you asshole!!"

In all his commotion, he had grabbed a can of spray paint (who knows where he got it) and had proceeded to vandalize Yuki's old house.

"I'm gonna fuck up your house!! How do you like that?! I'll bet you'll hate this!!"

He continued to blab on and on to the Yuki he had drawn on the wall and sobbed, putting his ear against the wall and waiting to hear the Yuki Drawing respond to his questions.

He had almost lost him that time, but thanks to Ayaka herself, he had had (with a little help from Yuki's brother, Tatsuha) time to create an ingenious plan that had Yuki's father eating out of Shuichi's palm, at least for the short time the plan had worked.

The mission: PRETEND TO BE AYAKA.

Now, Yuki's father hadn't seen Ayaka since she was a child, so he had no idea that Shuichi was indeed an imposter of his future daughter-in-law.

Naturally, the plan had failed in less than 5 minutes when Shuichi had decided to tell Yuki's father that he was his son's lover, lifted up his skirt and showed him his exposed manhood.

Yeah...those were the days...

But not today! Today was horrible! Yuki was nowhere to be seen and today was Shuichi's only weekend off from work!

"What a crappy day..." Shuichi mumbled to himself as he dressed, dried his tears and walked slowly out of the bedroom.

He went into the kitchen yawning loudly and scratching his head with puffy eyelids half opened as he opened the refrigerator door to take out the milk. Overtime, he had developed enough cell brains to cease attempting to cook anything, especially if it involved a knife, and decided to have cereal this morning. It seemed that no matter how much Shuichi attempted to please Yuki, he would always fail disastrously.

Shuichi stared into the fridge for ten minutes before realizing there was no milk.

"Godammit! Where's the milk? I just bought some yesterday!"

If he had had more patience and used more than 5 of his brain, he would have had enough sense to move the juice carton to one side to reveal the milk carton.

But of course, he didn't, and so Shuichi got his keys and proceeded to walk out the door to go buy some milk for his cereal.

"THERE HE IS!"

"DON'T LET HIM GET AWAY!"

As soon as Shuichi locked the door behind him, a violent riot of reporters and fans raced towards him, madly screaming questions at him and trying to prevent him from escaping.

"Oh SHIT!!" Shuichi cried, dodging the microphones, tape recorders and bras that were mercilessly thrown at him. "GODAMMIT! GO AWAY!" he whined.

"DID YOU HEAR THAT? HE SAID GODAMMIT!!"

"HE CUSSED!"

"THIS IS GOLD! KEEP THE CAMERA ROLLING ABRAHAM!"

"It's Tina"

"WHAT-EVER!"

This continued on for ten more minutes, until Shuichi had screamed, "HEY LOOK! IS THAT 'EIRI YUKI' I SEE WAYYYYYY," he pointed his finger to the other side of the street, "OVER THERE!?" This statement made every single reporter and fan sharply turn his or her head back to try and catch a glimpse of the hot young novelist.

Shuichi took this brief opportunity to successfully escape from the claws of publicity and ran for it.

"Where'd he go!"

"I could have sworn I saw him run this way."

"Maybe he went inside..." the girl looked around the area, "that house!"

"LET'S GO!" they all screamed in unison.

Shuichi watched as his crazed fans forced their way into a random house as they obliterated anything or anyone that got in their way.

"What a bunch of idiots...they look so stupid." He murmured.

"Like you don't."

Shuichi screamed as he looked up at Hiro.

"WAAAHHHHH! HIRO! DON'T SCARE ME LIKE THAT DAMMIT!"

"What the hell are you doing in that trashcan?"

"Hiding! What else!"

"And you couldn't have picked a more sanitary location to hide in?"

"I can't help it" Shuichi protested, brushing off the banana peal on his head, "all the good spots were taken."

Shuichi pointed out random celebrities who were hiding in trees and bushes.

"I see..." said Hiro as he looked around from the top of his sunglasses.

"Hiro! Let's go before those icky girls come back!" urged Shuichi, "Besides...I'm hungry!"

"Okay. Just hurry up and get out of there." He said.

Shuichi started to lift his right foot out of the trashcan, but since, by some twist of fate, his shoe laces were untied, he stepped on his shoe lace and tripped inside the trashcan, which in turn started to roll down the empty street.

"GYAAAHHHHHH! HELP MEEEEEEEE!"

Shuichi rolled down the street miserably, waiting for someone or something to stop him.

"Hey! That makes great target practice!" someone yelled.

Then Shuichi saw a bullet hole go through the trashcan, narrowly missing his nose.

"OH SHIT! I'M GONNA DIEEE!"

Many more bullets went through the fast moving trashcan, all of which narrowly missed the traumatized singer beyond belief.

"K-SAN! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING! SHUICHI IS IN THERE!" cried the voice of Hiro.

"What! Well that changes everything!" said K.

K shot the car tire of a poor soul that happened to be driving by and it skidded out of control before coming to a complete stop, standing in the way of Shuichi's path.

Shuichi crashed into the car and flew out of the trashcan, landing in the hard concrete floor. He sat up dumbfounded, wondering why all the miniature looking Yukis were rotating around his head.

"Shuichi! are you okay!" said Hiro, running towards his young friend.

"Hey, hey Shuichi!" What's up?" said K cheerily and slapped Shuichi hard in the back. "I didn't know you liked to roll down the streets in trashcans too!"

"I'm hungry" was all Shuichi said before he passed out.

SOME HOURS LATER...

Shuichi was sleeping peacefully, steady inhales and exhales of oxygen filled his lungs as he dreamt of Yuki...Yuki...Yuki...

"What do you want?"

Shuichi snapped his violet eyes open. Was it true? Or was it just a dream? He pinched Yuki's cheeks.

"Ow!"

No! It was real! Yuki was finally here! Joy to the world!

"YUKI!!" screamed Shuichi, hugging the disgusted writer.

"Hey! Get off! You stink!"

"YUKI! WHERE'D YOU RUN OFF TO? I MISSED YOU SO MUCH!!"

"You don't have to scream. I'm sitting right here!" he said, rubbing his right ear and trying to erase Shuichi's grating voice from his brain. "Jeez dude. I'm gone for a little more than half the day and you get yourself mobbed, canned, shot and run over by a stationary car. What the hell is wrong with you?"

"I didn't get run over!" he yelled. "OW!" He looked at his right index finger and saw that it was cut, probably from the car crash.

"Aaaghhhhh! I'm bleeding!" he screamed.

"Damn it! Shut up, punk!" groaned Yuki as he held his head. "Remember my stress."

"Oh! Sorry Yuki!"

"I said shut up!"

Yuki looked at Shuichi and sighed.

Why did he always make him feel bad?

"Your finger." He said.

"Huh?"

"You said you're bleeding. Let me see."

Shuichi made a mushy face and extended his arm towards Yuki.

"Are you going to kiss it for me?" Shuichi asked.

"I'll bite it off." Said Yuki and bandaged up the singer's finger.

Then Shuichi asked, "Yuki...I'm hungry. Do you know where the milk is?"

FIN ................................................................................................................................................

Well that's it! Tell me what you think! By the way, the 'finger' incident is from the manga. I guess I should include it in the disclaimer but I'm writing it here so who cares. Besides, most of this is from the manga. Well, whatever. If you read the manga, you know which parts. If you don't, well then it doesn't really matter now does it? Check my bio for updates on more Gravitation stories! I only write them when I'm in writer's block for my other stories, and that is now becoming a tiring routine. Okay, I'll shut up now. So review you little punk!

Adios!

THESE ARE REVIEWS FOR THIS STORY WHEN IT WAS POSTED AS AN INDIVIDUAL STORY. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THOSE PEOPLE WHO REVIEWD!

From: PerfectCell17
Wow, that was soo funny! I especially liked: "I can't help it" Shuichi protested, brushing off the banana peal on his head, "all the good spots were taken."

Shuichi pointed out random celebrities who were hiding in trees and bushes.

Hehehe, this fic was priceless! Good job!

From: clari chan
Lol..very funny...lol...:D

From: Yakari Taito
I think this is the best part:

Shuichi pointed out random celebrities who were hiding in trees and bushes.

I laughed my head off when I read that!

From: Kitty in the Box
this is cute esp the part when yuki sed "I'll bite it off." that was so cool!

From: Tate Soyker
OMG. THis was the funniest thing i have read in a long time! I love gravation, but i haven't gotton a chance to read any of the mangas yet. Anyways great story it really made me smile!

From: "cleek" ...um..yeah anyways looking forward for those other stories...ok...love and peace "cleek"